Approach to very unpleasant events in story

[TheWritingGroup]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

 

[grey228]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

Try making it a police report (the detective is discussing it with a coworker, but make sure no HIPAA violations are involved), or a social case worker, or a medical assistant / vocational nurse / registered nurse (again, remember HIPAA ... maybe have the nurse write to her diary, IDK LOL).

Some details are a must to make a story work; compromising yourself to fit publication standards slowly kills your inner creativity.

 

[WCSGarland]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

I don't have enough context on your story to make a guess as to whether it is too unpleasant to read. Sometimes, the story needs the nitty gritty to provide context to what happens in the rest of the story and you just can't get around it. As Grey228 said, it might be worth it to leave it as is and see if it is approved or if you need to 'buff the edges off' so to speak.

 

[ElectricBlue]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

What's the purpose of the story? Gratuitous titillation or serious commentary on a serious issue?

If the former, then I'd ask why are you writing it? If the latter, then you probably should be doing a lot of homework, because if you get the telling wrong, that will cause distress for some readers. And if you think it possibly pushes again Lit guidelines, then maybe you already know the answer to that one.

What's the core and heart of the story? Why is it being told? Have you sought advice from someone who knows abuse first hand? There's folk here who could help with that.

Sounds like the degree of remove is the least of your problems.

 

[JGittes]

Mel Gibson envisioned and filmed an ending to Braveheart that explicitly showed precisely what was done to execute William Wallace. When people started vomiting at the previews, even Mel Gibson had to admit he'd gone too far.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Are the details necessary to the story? What would you lose if you cut it to one sentence that said "That summer, she suffered a brutal violent attack including rape and broken limbs. As a result, she ... " and then the rest of your story.

Lit is unlikely to have a problem unless it looks like you're writing to titillate certain readers with gory detail.

I've got a story where the protagonist says "let's just say my only sexual experiences were non-consensual" and gets on with the plot, which is mainly her having panic attacks every time she tries penetrative sex. No more detail needed.

 

[NuclearFairy]

My chaptered story has the protagonist suffering repeated onscreen abuse, and I've never had to censor it. Of course there is far more abuse that is simply alluded to. So I think as long as you aren't writing the abuse to be arousing, and maybe if you put up some trigger warnings to let readers know where in the story the abuse is going to happen it should probably be okay.

 

[NotWise]

Relating the event during therapy is going to be a lot more comfortable for your readers. Maybe you want to make them uncomfortable. If not, then you already have your alternative.

 

[AwkwardMD]

Explore your art. The only reason to include serious trauma is to make it pay off seriously.

 

[Lifestyle66]

...
The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

That's how I handled the wife's abduction and rape in "Aftermath, Just Loving You."

The story describes their loving marriage before the abduction, then goes into details of her experiences and changes afterwards.

The original version of the story, "Aftermath, or I Can't Go For That" was from her husband's POV, and didn't go into any details of her experiences. But one comment asked for a sequel with details, saying there was much left unsaid by her about her ordeal.


EDIT: Emotionally provocative stories like that get quite the reaction. My original version of the story has 66 comments, and the second version 45 comments. (Of course, this is in Loving Wives, which is rather easy to get a reaction.)

 

[AG31]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

The same answer to all such questions. It depends. It depends mostly, I think, on who's doing the reading. You need to do what works for your story. You can't know who your readers will be.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Explore your art. The only reason to include serious trauma is to make it pay off seriously.

This.

Without saying you shouldn't, I might suggest that you consider how necessary it is to include the details when the event could be referred to and quite possibly have the same effect.

 

[ShelbyDawn57]

In Sucker Bets, I handled it like this:

"Hey, Ted. I'm home and the lights are all out..." I called him to leave a message on his phone.

"I told you, bitch, nobody tells Dante no." Dante grabbed my arm and spun me around.

"Dante, what the hell?!" was all I got out as his massive fist hurtled toward my face.

I woke up in the hospital. My left eye had a cold bandage over it, and I could tell Dante hadn't treated me gently. From the way my ass hurt, I was pretty sure he got what he came for. Trembling, I couldn't hold the tears back.

"She's awake. Ted, she's awake." I heard Maggie's voice.

"Miki, I'm here. I stopped him. You're going to be ok. I promise." He took my hand. I had to turn my head to see him. He looked like he had been crying, too. "I stopped him. Miki, I stopped him."

It registered what he was saying. "But it hurts."

"He was using his fingers when I got there, but I stopped him before he could..." He couldn't say it.

"You stopped him. How?"

"Never underestimate a man in love with a baseball bat." Eddie sat down next to me on the other side of the bed. Maggie stood behind him. I tried to smile, but my face hurt too much. "I talked to the arresting officer in the hall. Dante won't be bothering anyone for a long time. Breaking and entering, aggravated assault, attempted rape, and violating a restraining order. Plus, I think he parked illegally. Your boyfriend had the whole thing recorded on his phone."

 

[TheWritingGroup]

Thanks, all.

The details do matter, but that doesn't mean they have to be explicitly described. I'm going to have to toss a few thousand words, but I believe I'll just have her describe what happened a shortened, somewhat abstract way later.

-Annie

 

[AlexBailey]

If you want to include your own analysis of such abuse have the character tell the story to another character, whether it’s a friend, a therapist, a lover, a cop, or even an attorney.

The listener can ask questions and be supportive, they can say what you’re thinking and console her the way you would do for someone else.

You could easily cover horrific situations while only sharing as much or as little as your traumatized character would be inclined to do. Any reader with similar trauma could then relate to the situation without being dragged through the worst details.

 

[pink_silk_glove]

In a WiP, I have my heroine pretty seriously abused. That's part of the plot and won't be changing.

As currently written, it's told directly, in tight third-person from the heroine's point of view. It's really harsh, and I'm concerned that it's too unpleasant to read and might even be a bit much for Lit's guidelines.

The other way it can fit into the story is as told by the heroine to a therapist, after the events. That puts it at one remove.

Thoughts?

-Annie

If the abuse is meant to be arousing, technically you are breaking the rules but it takes a lot to get rejected so you're probably still okay in that regard.

This is what you do - you write the story, publish it, and expect a lower score. If you wish to avoid a lower score, do not publish it here (unless the victim is a cheating wife, then you can post to LW).