has this every happened to anyone else? :(

[sexigodess26]

no matter how hard i try, and no matter how good the partner im with is, i cant seem to orgasm with anyone. I can make myself orgasm time after time after time, both clitorally and gspot orgasms, but whenever im with someone i cant do it.. can anyone help?

 

[Bigg_Capone]

no matter how hard i try, and no matter how good the partner im with is, i cant seem to orgasm with anyone. I can make myself orgasm time after time after time, both clitorally and gspot orgasms, but whenever im with someone i cant do it.. can anyone help?

Maybe you just need to relax a little more, loosen up (no pun intended). Don't force yourself or get yourself worked up over the issue. Let it cum naturally.

 

[sebboh]

Have you showed anyone how to get you there? The whole 'touch here, a little to the left, down a bit, etc'? Sometimes people need a bit of coaching on what a person needs.

 

[lovechild27]

How old are you?

 

[sexigodess26]

i'm 20... im mature its not an issue of not knowing what im doing, i just cant seem to let go or something.. its very frustrating

 

[lovechild27]

has nothing to do with maturity

maybe your not ready to come with a partner...sounds weird but I dont think its that un common. Im 23 and couldnt come with a guy until i was 21!

 

[Bigg_Capone]

It's not all that uncommon for a woman during her late teens and early twenties to have sexual intercourse without experiencing orgasm themselves. Like I said, don't try to force it. Let it cum naturally and share yourself with your partner. Let them know what feels good and what doesn't. Relax. Take your time, don't rush. Good luck.

 

[JRaven]

Being open

I think it has a lot to do with truly being open and comfortable with the guy. While I didn't have problems getting myself off, it took my husband three months to get me off. Not that he was doing anything wrong. It just took time.
Jenny

 

[Cardinal]

I think it has a lot to do with truly being open and comfortable with the guy. While I didn't have problems getting myself off, it took my husband three months to get me off. Not that he was doing anything wrong. It just took time.


THREE MONTHS!!
Didn't he get tired? I bet his tounge was sore. You have one dedicated husband

 

[Lynnezertorte]

no matter how hard i try, and no matter how good the partner im with is, i cant seem to orgasm with anyone. I can make myself orgasm time after time after time, both clitorally and gspot orgasms, but whenever im with someone i cant do it.. can anyone help?

I was 33 before I had an orgasm with a man. And the bottom line was that I was too self-conscious to relax enough to let it happen. It finally happened when I was with a man I truly cared about and I knew he truly cared about me.

Communication is the key.

 

[ReadyOne]

1. Talk to him. Expressing any fears can really help them go away.

2. Do what ever relaxes you. Make him massage you (non sexual) until you melt, hot tub together, get really relaxed before you start getting aroused. Sneak up on the orgasm.

3. Try slowly building your horniness over time, at least hours if not days. The more aroused you get, the longer you should stretch it out, and then let it dwindle a bit before going at it again.

End up with you wanting him so bad you're actively trying to rape him, and he teasing you by holding your hands away from your pussy when you want to rub it, and deliberately stopping when you beg him to keep going.

4. Try totally giving up control. Put yourself in a position where you no longer have any choice at all about what will happen to you because you are tied to the bed or such.

Disconnect your senses (Blindfold, ear phones) so you can't follow what he's doing and every touch is a surprise. Your anxiety may really build up, but keep going until you break though it into surrender and acceptance.

4. Get a couple of orgasms first no matter what it takes. Have him hold you while you masturbate. (Long short; you sound too uptight to let that happen.)

5. Consider drugs, i.e. a drink to ease inhibitions. Don't get drunk, just get a very nice mellow warm buzz.

 

[jupiter lilly]

This is something that has only recently become less of a problem for me. I still have yet to come from intercourse alone...

For me, I think it really is an issue of comfort...and also getting used to another person's touch. I have no problem getting myself off...but now, after 6 months of being together I am finally able to come with decent regularity when I am with my boy...sometimes even more than once. I know it has a lot to do with my comfort level, and also with communicating with him. Even though it was hard for me to verbalize sometimes, I have been able to help him learn what sort of things I like and what feels good to me...and now he does just that.

 

[Zergplex]

Zergplex Says

This is something that has only recently become less of a problem for me. I still have yet to come from intercourse alone...

For me, I think it really is an issue of comfort...and also getting used to another person's touch. I have no problem getting myself off...but now, after 6 months of being together I am finally able to come with decent regularity when I am with my boy...sometimes even more than once. I know it has a lot to do with my comfort level, and also with communicating with him. Even though it was hard for me to verbalize sometimes, I have been able to help him learn what sort of things I like and what feels good to me...and now he does just that.

Just teach us what you want and we obey ^_~

-Zergplex

 

[Bigg_Capone]

This is something that has only recently become less of a problem for me. I still have yet to come from intercourse alone...

For me, I think it really is an issue of comfort...and also getting used to another person's touch. I have no problem getting myself off...but now, after 6 months of being together I am finally able to come with decent regularity when I am with my boy...sometimes even more than once. I know it has a lot to do with my comfort level, and also with communicating with him. Even though it was hard for me to verbalize sometimes, I have been able to help him learn what sort of things I like and what feels good to me...and now he does just that.

Comfort is a major issue. It makes sense that you'd want your lover to open him/herself up to you and relax enough to enjoy the act of sexual intercourse. If your partner doesn't really feel open, you should try to ease his or her conscience and pay attention to the subtleties of his or her mannerisms, body language, and all of that to see what needs to be worked on. This works both ways, in my opinion.