Secretary on Oxygen

[Chris_Xavier]

, i was sorely disappointed in the film and actually quite a few of the scenes bother me, the bathtub scene being one, and the last scene where she leaves the bug on the bed (so she can get "punished) being another.

See.. that's the kind of sub I'd love to have. I don't want a doormat. If I wanted that I'd go to Lowes and buy one or go get a dog.

 

[@}-}rebecca----]

I think you're still asleep. Oxygen is a cable TV network, just like Fox News, CNN, the Turner networks, TVLand, Spike TV, whatever.

Oxygen has other shows on besides movies, but they are all kind of woman oriented. And the movies seem to be geared more to women's interests, too. You don't have cable TV down there? Or maybe yours doesn't offer the Oxygen network.

Don't ask me where the name Oxygen comes from, other than the air we breathe. Using it as a network name, I'm lost.

Heeeeeeeeey I'm awake : chuckles : and years ago we had Foxtel. There have simply been times when considering making monthly payments for cable TV was very low on my list on desired financial commitments. I never took the option in the new apartment. Considering my fluctuating income it turned out a wise choice .

DVS I rarely watch TV , I think the time I spend online is quite enough in front of a screen . To vacate one area for another is not a habit I intend on and I could see it easily happening . Better not to go there . The occasional DVD we can enjoy 'guilt free' in structured time .

As my current projects necessitate being online, it's has become inescapable. It's simply too easy to go off on another tangent ( ie not so quick browse of Lit ) . You know I have much adored family & friends that switch on the TV from the moment they wake and it stays on until lock up at night and run computer(s) as well .Never silence , never music.

I am toying with the idea of getting cable prior to Christmas , exclusively for my son's recreation room. School holidays last a month then, so it provides a good test zone in relation to the project I am part of a team working on in augmentative technology and state of the art hardware devices . An off shoot thereof being home automation features which can be tested here at home as we are pre-wired for it. C-bus can be a beautiful thing in the right circumstances and he will certainly benefit from the technology when we make it that far.

Who knows , there was a time we had no TV for 3 years by my personal choice , we survived ! I promise to keep you informed

 

[Otto26]

ugh. i didn't care for that movie at all, but much of that is my own fault due to false expectations. the thing is, i was expecting it to be a movie about a Dominant and a submissive, and it's not that at all. there's nothing submissive about Lee, and nothing Dominant about Spader's character. it's basically a mediocre story about two troubled individuals who find peace and salvation through their toppish/bottomish relationship. but because i was expecting/hoping to see a D/s situation, not a bdsm top/bottom situation, i was sorely disappointed in the film and actually quite a few of the scenes bother me, the bathtub scene being one, and the last scene where she leaves the bug on the bed (so she can get "punished) being another.

I thought it was an excellent touch, consent always remains with the submissive. So who's really in control?

 

[BiBunny]

I thought it was an excellent touch, consent always remains with the submissive. So who's really in control?

This ain't a fight you want to pick with this particular individual, ok? Just trust me on that one.

In all honesty, I thought the movie was boring. A cutter who's "saved" because she finds someone else to inflict pain on her? She needed a good therapist more than she needed a dominant, IMO. Not to mention the fact that the Dom was whiny and insecure. I'd have flipped him in a fucking heartbeat.

 

[Chris_Xavier]

This ain't a fight you want to pick with this particular individual, ok? Just trust me on that one.

In all honesty, I thought the movie was boring. A cutter who's "saved" because she finds someone else to inflict pain on her? She needed a good therapist more than she needed a dominant, IMO. Not to mention the fact that the Dom was whiny and insecure. I'd have flipped him in a fucking heartbeat.

Yeah.. but you're a switch. If you were a sub, you'd think different. At least I think you would.

 

[WriterDom]

The first bdsm movie where the Dom wasn't some leather clad serial killer and you want to critique it? Blasphemy!

 

[Netzach]

I actually really like that film. He's not Dominant material for everyone, but he is for her. He's what suits her. Yeah the cutting being "cured" thing is flimsy fiction, but I don't really care if it's not totally realistic. The film is presented as a kind of fairy tale - and I think it's OK if we get a fairy tale of our own. I don't mind that she's fucked up and he's fucked up because mentally healthy characters leading un-fucked up lives are shitty art. I don't need my art to completely reflect my reality, just resonate with chunks of it.

I also found the bath scene kind of blah, but...

when she gets asked why she can't move her hands it's because she "doesn't want to" - which I think is a really powerful statement and something we lose track of in our own self mythologizing. That's the defining moment of the whole film for me, and a damn fine one.

I think it's a better film if you see it as a film about female sexual discovery than a film about Dee Ess. And let's face it, that's a subject most films completely fail to express, where this one haltingly approaches some of the beauty of it.

 

[Netzach]

Heeeeeeeeey I'm awake : chuckles : and years ago we had Foxtel. There have simply been times when considering making monthly payments for cable TV was very low on my list on desired financial commitments. I never took the option in the new apartment. Considering my fluctuating income it turned out a wise choice .

DVS I rarely watch TV , I think the time I spend online is quite enough in front of a screen . To vacate one area for another is not a habit I intend on and I could see it easily happening . Better not to go there . The occasional DVD we can enjoy 'guilt free' in structured time .

As my current projects necessitate being online, it's has become inescapable. It's simply too easy to go off on another tangent ( ie not so quick browse of Lit ) . You know I have much adored family & friends that switch on the TV from the moment they wake and it stays on until lock up at night and run computer(s) as well .Never silence , never music.

I am toying with the idea of getting cable prior to Christmas , exclusively for my son's recreation room. School holidays last a month then, so it provides a good test zone in relation to the project I am part of a team working on in augmentative technology and state of the art hardware devices . An off shoot thereof being home automation features which can be tested here at home as we are pre-wired for it. C-bus can be a beautiful thing in the right circumstances and he will certainly benefit from the technology when we make it that far.

Who knows , there was a time we had no TV for 3 years by my personal choice , we survived ! I promise to keep you informed

See we are long lost twins.

I literally haul ass over to my sister in law's when Project Runway is in season and that's IT.

 

[northwoods_sub]

DVS and Chris, the entire movie is on youtube in 10 minute snipets. I don't know how to do a link thingy so you will have to try to find it or go to the thread about kinky movies that Marquis started and on pg 11 there is a link there.

 

[myinnerslut]

Yeah.. but you're a switch. If you were a sub, you'd think different. At least I think you would.

no, im a sub and i feel the same way.


when i said before i had a few issues with the movie, i was understating. i have many many issues with the movie, the fact that the dom being weak and whiney being one of them

 

[Evil_Geoff]

... A cutter who's "saved" because she finds someone else to inflict pain on her? She needed a good therapist more than she needed a dominant, IMO. Not to mention the fact that the Dom was whiny and insecure. I'd have flipped him in a fucking heartbeat.

My take on Secretary has been posted elsewhere, and I won't re-invent the wheel here. But I will say this:

I soooooo identify with Spader's character, the inner struggle against societal programming, the utter dis-belief that someone actually WANTS him to do to her what HE wants to do with her, the cat-and-mouse games while she educates herself (Look at the books she is reading in several scenes, she's got many of the books WE recommend to newbies!), the way she tries to get him to accept her in that role...

And just you TRY to flip me, Bunny! Hehehehehe

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I'm a freak to the core, but I hate that damn movie, LOL. The way it depicts the sub as someone with a mental illness whom only big, strong Domly man can solve makes me feel mildly nauseated. Every kinky person in the world is not fucked up in the head, contrary to popular belief.

You totally missed it Bunny. HE doesn't fix her. SHE fixes herself. Grey was a helpful tool for her self expression and discovery but it isn't because of what he does. It's because she learns to accept who and what she is and comes to peace with that. He just helps her come to that realization. It's a journey about her discovering herself, and she takes Grey along with her growth and discovery.

If anything, it's her coming into Grey's life that saves him...

Now go back and re-watch the movie.

 

[CutieMouse]

Damn you people I just stayed up way too late watching it in snippets on YouTube.

And now I miss J and his ever-lovin' [non-whiney, very self assured, totally type A personality] OCD self. Y'all suck.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

... Y'all suck.

But if you're really nice, we might even swallow!

 

[CutieMouse]

But if you're really nice, we might even swallow!

You dork; that's my job (not that I'm offering, no offense). Which I can't exactly do at the moment, because there's this whole world of stress and an ocean (and I think a tropical storm) in the way. Have I mentioned I can't sleep lately?

 

[Evil_Geoff]

You dork; that's my job (not that I'm offering, no offense). Which I can't exactly do at the moment, because there's this whole world of stress and an ocean (and I think a tropical storm) in the way. Have I mentioned I can't sleep lately?

*chuckles and says in his best Richard Nixon voice...*
I am NOT a dork! *LOL*

I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better, Cutie! {{{{{HUG}}}}}

 

[minx1]

My take on Secretary has been posted elsewhere, and I won't re-invent the wheel here. But I will say this:

I soooooo identify with Spader's character, the inner struggle against societal programming, the utter dis-belief that someone actually WANTS him to do to her what HE wants to do with her, the cat-and-mouse games while she educates herself (Look at the books she is reading in several scenes, she's got many of the books WE recommend to newbies!), the way she tries to get him to accept her in that role...

And just you TRY to flip me, Bunny! Hehehehehe

Yeah, I liked Spaders character and didn't find him particularly whiney. I liked the subtleties of his dominant nature. Infact there are aspects of the character he portrayed that I find very attractive...in terms of Dom material.

 

[MasterPhoenix]

At first I didn't like Spader's character. But having rewatched it I could see it being about his journey as well as hers...

 

[sincerely_helene]

Enjoyed the movie in general, but felt his character would have had more impact minus the closet scene.

 

[His_pita]

By the way, I found the secretary (Maggie Gyllenhaal) quite sexy. I love her facial expressions and her um...drive. Actually, I think I'm in love.

My Joe fell in love with her too.

We liked the movie a lot. I admired her in scene where she doesn't leave her chair. I would never be that strong...or pee on myself.

I really liked Spader, but did think he was a little whiny for my taste.

 

[WriterDom]

I can still see her finger crossing over his hand after the spanking.

 

[ownedsubgal]

I think it's a better film if you see it as a film about female sexual discovery than a film about Dee Ess. And let's face it, that's a subject most films completely fail to express, where this one haltingly approaches some of the beauty of it.

i agree with that, as a film about female sexual discovery, acceptance and empowerment, it's decent. as a film about anything remotely relating to D/s, it's bulldookey.

 

[neonflux]

Yeah.. but you're a switch. If you were a sub, you'd think different. At least I think you would.

*waves hand* Think this is more a matter of personal taste than role. I love this film. It is about two people discovering and coming to terms with who they are. I actually see her as being the much stronger character - when she realizes her nature, she immediately accepts it. It is her unwaivering strength and self-acceptance that allows him to find peace with himself.

<snipped>he film is presented as a kind of fairy tale - and I think it's OK if we get a fairy tale of our own.

Netz, I like your description of it as a fairy tale - all fairytales have a grain of truth. I interpret it as a film about the redemptive and healing power of sex and of whole-heartedly embracing one's sexual desires.... Neon

P.S., it is amazing how much dialogue this film stimulates anytime it comes up on these boards - love it or hate it, there is something compelling about it. to me, that's good art.

 

[ownedsubgal]

See.. that's the kind of sub I'd love to have. I don't want a doormat. If I wanted that I'd go to Lowes and buy one or go get a dog.

being obedient and non-manipulative doesn't make one a doormat, it's part of what makes one submissive. perhaps you don't want "a" submissive so much as a sexual sub or a bottom.

 

[CutieMouse]

being obedient and non-manipulative doesn't make one a doormat, it's part of what makes one submissive. perhaps you don't want "a" submissive so much as a sexual sub or a bottom.

You said it much better than I could have. That bratty little bug in the bed thing at the end (IMO) has nothing to do with being a self-aware, thinking, intelligent submissive (the opposite of a dog or doormat), and everything to do with being a brat, although it could have been something else....

Everyone else seems to interprit her smirk at the end as being willful; I watched the movie again last night and it hit me that it might have been more of a private joke between the two of them. (Says the woman who has a private joke with her Lover, with regards to the antique pistol on the side table in the living room, ever ever ever being moved to a 45 degree angle - which would result in nothing more meaningful or deep than a laughing playful swat on the ass.)