Then, Now and After -

[cgraven]

NOW


The gentle way Carole hands cup my face, the way she steps into me her body so warm and inviting. Her kiss sweet, loving, never had I been so attracted to a woman, yet it was if I had know her for a very long time. My mind was in a confused whirling state how could this be I am sure I had never met her before, but yet that nagging feeling that I did.

I swept Carole into my arms and walked out of the barn. Standing there in the sun I turn not to the house but to the small patch of woods. And the old oak tree that stood on the edge of the green wood. There in the shadows of that old oak with is ivy, the mistletoe; I gently set Carole on her feet. Our kiss breaks and I recline in the shade of that tree and extend my hand to her, my eyes shine into hers inviting her to join me there.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Now - As Carole

I’m stunned when William whisks me up in his arms, carrying me out of the yard, moving with perfect determination toward a little patch of woods. God help me, I feel like a bride. My mind is fluttering and skidding with emotion. Every image, every scent, is familiar yet new. The depth of my feelings for this man I have just met baffles me. I can’t begin to understand why. WHY?

As he releases me, setting me down, I can only stare at him. When he lays in the shade of the oak, his eyes shining with appeal, I shake my head numbly. Trying to make sense of this all, it’s impossible. Home, husband, kids, job. The litany of my responsibilities whispering in my mind fades entirely when I drop to my knees with a cry, to be in his embrace again.

 

[cgraven]

I watch as Carole stands there here eyes flash with a series of emotions then soften as she drops to her keens with a little cry. Taking her hands in mine I draw her to me an enfold her tenderly in my arms; my kisses are soft and sweet. I kiss her eyelids the tip of her nose, and then my lips brush hers, my tongue sliding along her full lower lip asking to be invited again into the sweet warmth of Carole mouth.

My hands leveling explore her body, I roll Carole on her back, my fingers toy with the 1st button on her blouse then it comes undone and I kiss the newly exposed skin, her fragrance so intoxicating. The 2nd button opens and a soft kiss. When the 3rd button surrenders my kisses lightly trace the contours of her breasts, then a slow sensual lick up that heavenly scented valley.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Now - As Carole

Yes, I abandon all thoughts of home, husband, kids, as I am enclosed again in William’s arms. His lips are a caress on my face as he kisses me, his mouth stifling my moan as I open to him. My hands seek to know him, touching him wherever I can to learn more of this man.

When he pulls me over so I am lying beneath him, I catch my breath. His fingers deftly unbuttoning my blouse, I moan again, my hands twining in his hair as I feel his lips leave an imprint of fire on my breast. With each button more kisses, then I shiver when he traces the outline of my breasts with his tongue. I watch him there, licking a slow path up my cleavage, tense with longing.

“William, what are we doing?”

 

[cgraven]

NOW

Carole abandons herself to my kisses and caresses. Her hands explore me their gentle yet demanding touch leave molten fire in their wake. I have no thoughts of family, the struggles to keep the ranch going. There is only one thing in my heart and mid and that is Carole.

I raise my head and our eyes meet I see the smoldering desire in her eyes yet there is also guilt there a guilt that now closes its ice fingers around my heart and soul.

“William, what are we doing?”

Carole’s question echoes in my mind over and over again ad tears at my soul. How can I answer her when I am not sure myself yet her question begs and answer. I swallow letting my mind go blank and speaking from my heart instead.

“Carole I know in my mind this is wrong, I am married, have a wife and child that I love dearly, Yet there is something deep in my soul, in my heart that tells me we where meant to be together, that we have always been meant to be tighter and yet some how fate has torn us apart, played the cruelest of tricks on us.”

I look away I can not stand to see the hurt in Carole’s eyes.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Now - Carole

I watch William above me, on me; his beautiful eyes speak so eloquently of his desire. When he speaks in response to a question I barely remember asking, my heart seems to stop –

“Carole I know in my mind this is wrong, I am married, have a wife and child that I love dearly, Yet there is something deep in my soul, in my heart that tells me we where meant to be together, that we have always been meant to be together and yet some how fate has torn us apart, played the cruelest of tricks on us.”

I feel the length of him, heat of him. I feel his heartbeat. He burns so bright. His words speak directly to my heart and the confusion I have felt since meeting him. This is not a random passion. Not a giggle or lark, or freak occurrence of instant lust, or love at first sight. This is a culmination of lifelong need, frenetic and utterly necessary.

To turn my, our backs on this… can we really? Without damage, without breaking into fragments, without death to that undeniable part of us? Can we stop, get up, shake it off and say, “My that was strange,” and get back to the real world?

An image of my kid’s faces and the disheveled hair of my husband in bed floats before me. I am unhappy and depressed outside of this. What right do I have to add pain to those who are loyal and loving to me? Or William, his wife and child.

At this moment, I would have given my soul to have not questioned our passion. I wish I had flowed into him, no reservations. A hurt like none other starts in my breast, my heart. It pushes up and out.

“William…” whispered with a sob as I pull him to me fiercely, holding him against me – sobbing now into his neck. Regret crushing my soul. The same soul that just soared with jubilation mere moments ago.

 

[cgraven]

The silence is crushing as I look into the sorrow in Carole’s eyes a sorrow I know must be a reflection of my own. We both had family and responsibilities, neither one of us where free. Yet my soul yearned for Carole. There was a dull ache that was becoming a sharp pain in my heart.

”William…….”

Carole soft whisper was choked off by a deep heart wrench sigh. She clung desperately to me hugging me fiercely her face buried in the crock of my next, her body shook with silent sobs. I had no words of comfort for Carole, no hope to offer her, we both knew what we must do but neither one of us wanted to voice that truth. We lay there throughout the after noon, I had the strong nagging feeling that this deep love I felt for her , the fact that we could not act on it, was the past replaying itself in some strange way.

“Carole we can’t we both now that, but if fate is kind we will meet again when we are free, if not in this life then in the future some where, some time..”

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Now - As Carole

The dry dusty afternoon under the oak. It will be seared forever in my mind. The bittersweet agonizing afternoon held against his chest. Holding me, until my sobs end, the outside sobs anyway. Holding me and trying to put a lifetime in the embrace. I held him fiercely, returning his embrace and allowing the love to flow between us for an afternoon.

His words are brutal, necessary.

“Carole we can’t, we both now that, but if fate is kind we will meet again when we are free, if not in this life then in the future some where, some time…”

Then I grasp onto the hope he provides. This life is too late, it’s obvious. But his words seem right, must be right.

We finally break our embrace and sit, searching each other’s eyes, my hands go to my neck, and remove the charm that has been around my neck for 30 years. My father, God rest his soul, put it around my neck right before his death. He’d told me the story of finding it in an overgrown meadow in England. It’s quite old he said, and he knew it was meant for me.

I hold the charm up, letting the gilt glitter in the late afternoon sun.

“This is yours William. My father called it a Virgin Blessing. He said it is very old. I don’t know if it’s possible, but I feel it is, I FEEL it is just possible to promise you we’ll be together again,” my voice shaking with emotion as I drop the charm around his neck.

"My William."

My eyes cloud again with tears as I take his sweet face in my hands and kiss him... for the last time in this life.

 

[cgraven]

Space exploration had become the priority of earth over five hundred years ago as its resources began to play out. The solar system had provided only a temporary solution. The two hungered and fifty years past the ion drive engine was finally perfected. Making first inter stellar travel possible, then inter galactic travel a reality. But planets where plundered alien races enslaved or eliminated in wars of genocide, and slowly every thing slipped in to chaos. Now local feudal lords ruled stellar systems, they ruled with an iron fist greedily protecting new worlds and there resources that came under their control.

Slowly out of selfish self interest the use of environmentalist was adopted to manage planetary resources to optimize the plundering of these new worlds, keeping them in production as long as possible. The new since of “Sensory Specialist” emerged, that where intone with the life forces. This ability was strongest among the young. It was felt that these rare humans could aid in keeping the life forces of the plundered planets in balance and the production potential lengthened.

Derek Williams was one of the best environmentalists, he had been at it now for thirty years, and at he was still a powerful man and led the exploration teams for the system lord of the crag nebula. He waited impatiently for the sensory specialist assigned to this mission. All he knew was that she was fresh out of training. He paced outside air lock 12B. This kid was already 15 minutes late and Derek was not pleased at the delay.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

After - Alyssa

Ensign Alyssa Descartes was having a bad day. Her cargo slated for delivery to coincide with her arrival at her 1st duty station was bumped by shipment of liqueur destined for the Crag Nebula’s lead environmentalist. Never mind that she had spent a third of the journey green with motion sickness. ‘You really haven’t lived,’ she thought, ‘until you can say you puked in Zero G’.

As she stood tapping her foot with impatience, waiting for the airlock to finish its cycle, her irritability grew. Who was the fool that thought his brandy was a top priority?

Alyssa had graduated at the top of her class and had led a charmed existence by anyone’s standards. Her sensory talent was discovered when she first hit her teens, and from then until now, three weeks after her 25th birthday, she has been in training. Nurtured, coddled, allowed to concentrate on honing her skills, her education entirely paid for by the System Lord’s Council. The System Lord just happened to be her mother’s cousin.

Alyssa intended to go far in her career, and didn’t take kindly to having her cargo bumped because of some idiot’s penchant for booze.

Almost humming with the need to take her frustration out on someone, her 5’7” skinny frame rather flew through the lock when it opened and abruptly collided with an imposing bulk causing her to careen off balance and land on her skinny butt.

“Imbecile! – Can’t you watch where I’m going?” she sputtered, trying to get to her feet, anger darkening her green eyes.

 

[cgraven]

AFTER

“Imbecile! – Can’t you watch where I’m going?”

Derek look down at a very attractive young woman wearing the uniform of an Ensign her gold bars still brand spanking new then the name tag just above the sensual curve of her breast Descartes

“Ensign I do not know what they are teaching now at the Academy but referring to your commanding officer as an Imbecile out here is not acceptable.”

I stood there glaring down at her, oh I was very much aware of her family connections but the overlord was 20 light years away.

“Ensign come to attention and report in, in the prescribed manner.”

This was going to be a very long two years.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

‘Great, the head rock jock himself,’ I sniggered to myself, as I dusted off the seat of my trousers and giving my shirt a tug. Giving him the name we called all the swaggering environmentalists bent on exploiting every ounce of usable ore on a planet.

“Ensign Descartes, reporting for duty Sir,” there, let him know right away who he’s dealing with. “I take it Sir, it’s you I have to thank for bumping my equipment to make way for your brandy?” and I’d be damned if I would apologize for calling him an imbecile.

“You’ve put me behind already Sir.” The old fart probably drinks it all himself, I sniff.

 

[cgraven]

I see the stiff neck pride and the air of superiority of not only a “Sensory Specialist”but also of her family. She would find out soon enough that family connections meant nothing on the outer fringes and in the UNKNOW Territories yet to be explored or mapped.

“Ensign Descartes, reporting for duty Sir,” there, let him know right away who he’s dealing with. “I take it Sir, it’s you I have to thank for bumping my equipment to make way for your brandy?”

She paused a smug smirk on her face.

“You’ve put me behind already Sir.”

I looked her up and down from the tip of her boots to her startling green eyes that where locked strait ahead as she stood rigidly at attention just oozing with pride and arrogance.

I handed Ensign Descartes a small envelop bearing the over Lords personal seal.

Captain Williams,

I have sent you a case of brandy as what is produced by the replacators is not palatable. And the privation of exploration are rigorous enough.

I am sure that it is not necessary to remind you that each member of your crew has been chosen for their skill and the fact that you are all in the end expendable when compared to the needs of the state.

May your voyage meet with success.

“Ensign Descartes do you have a first name by any chance.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Scanning the letter Captain Williams shoved at me, I read and couldn’t help but color a little. I hate the fair complexion that shows every little flush of emotion. Well, so what. Regardless if Uncle Harry sent it or this guy ordered it, I was still out of luck for the moment with no equipment.

Reading further, I dismissed the expendable bit, Uncle Harry was always a bit of a prick.

“Ensign Descartes do you have a first name by any chance?”

“Alyssa,” I answer not thinking and then looking at him really for the first time, I’m startled by his hazel eyes. Well, maybe he’s not THAT old, but still a rock jock.

Sighing, I grab my duffle, trying not to stumble at the weight of it, gravity here is awful, and ask “Okay, what next Captain? Think I can stow this and get to work?”

 

[cgraven]

“Alyssa,”……………………. “Okay, what next Captain? Think I can stow this and get to work?”

She sighs as she heaves her duffle to her shoulder. I have to admit that Alyssa is not bad on the eyes. But my policy had always been to keep work and play separate.

Come along Alyssa our departure is all ready over due.

Well that was how Ensign Alyssa Descartes and I had met three months ago on Space station ST 12. Three long months in a cramped scout ship. The rest of the crew where all season veteran and none them took kindly to our new Ensign’s smug superior attitude. I had had nothing but complaints from the crew, yet she had preformed her assigned duties well. But in the unexplored region it took more than just doing your job well. You had to act and think like a team and get along. Things had come to ahead and if I did not do something quickly I could have a mutiny on my hands.

I pressed the comm. Link.

“Ensign Descartes report to my cabin immediately.”

I was not looking forward to his as our meeting had always been heat.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Dodging crew and equipment, I make my way back to my quarters after shift. Three months. Three months on this piece of crap flying tin can. I hadn’t expected a luxury ship. But common courtesy would be nice. This crew was nothing but a bunch of crude rock jocks like their captain.

As I squeezed into my tiny quarters, I don’t even have time to pull off my sweaty tank and clean up when I hear my name on the speaker,

“Ensign Descartes report to my cabin immediately.”

Great. Just great. What this time? My attitude? My lack of team spirit? My inability to get along with the crew?

As I acknowledge the order, I wonder – should I take time and clean up? Nope, probably piss him off even worse if I didn’t get up there ASAP.

Slamming my door, I head topside and rap at the outside of his door.

“Ensign Descartes here, as ordered”, undoubedly for an butt-chewing I add silently.

 

[cgraven]

“Ensign Descartes here, as ordered”,

She stood there the ever constant smirk on her face, the expression of boredom in her starting dark green eyes, while she stood there at attention. Ensign Descartes had chosen to report to my cabin wearing her work uniform, sweaty tank top, she had not even bothered to wash her face or hands. I was livid this was the last straw I had had it with her. I rose from my desk and Stood there almost nose to nose with her.

“What is the meaning of this Ensign?”

My voice shaking with rage, and at that moment fate took a much unexpected hand in the matter. The ship violently lurched as we hit a space anomaly, thought this was a frailly common occurrence in the unexplored region, It propelled me into Ensign Alyssa Descartes our arms going around each other as we tried to maintain our footing, yet despite our effort I founds us on the deck our arms and legs tangled and I laying on top of her.

Her supple young body pressing in to mine and I was acutely aware of what a rare beauty she was. I opened my mouth to start to apologize when I found myself kissing Alyssa, no only kissing her , but kissing her in a very passionate and intimate way.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

I enter and close the hatch at his grunted “Enter” and stand at attention just inside. Well it seems that I have managed to piss him off by coming as is, as his glare takes in my appearance and his eyes narrow. That certainly isn’t anything new. I make my expression neutral and prepare for the assault.

I am just so sick of his constant riding and relentless complaint of my personality. I have never had to deal with a crew, my training was all centered on my ability and honing it. I know I don’t interact well with people here and naturally I am reserved, even shy if this fathead would bother seeing it. Well, I am certainly not going to beg for any consideration.

I can’t help but recoil slightly when he comes around his desk to stand imposingly before me.

“What is the meaning of this Ensign?” I’m in for it this time, his voice is actually shaking.

Just as I open my mouth to speak the deck disappears from under us, and the Captain and me do quite a dance to regain our balance before sprawling on the deck. The air is forced out of my lungs when he lands on top of me and as the ship regains it’s bearing, I stare up at him into those heated hazel eyes.

His mouth opens no doubt to blame this on me too, and instead his lips clamp down on mine and he is kissing me. Kissing me until my hands move to hold him on me. Kissing me until I feel his weight shift and I feel my breasts pressing into his deep chest. Kissing me until my mouth opens and I respond in kind to his passion. Kissing me until my breath is gone and I break that kiss.

“Here I was, thinking I was going to get chewed out again Captain.”

 

[cgraven]

Alyssa returns my kiss with a hot passion I never expected from this aloof beauty. She breaks our kiss and I am left breathless from its intensity.

“Here I was, thinking I was going to get chewed out again Captain.”

A coy smile bows her full ripe lips, so tempting so, and inviting, her voice a sensual, breathless whisper. All the reasons why this must stop know flash throw, my mine, I am her superior officer, sexual entanglements can only mean trouble on deep space voyages, and the list goes on and on, yet none of it means anything as the pent up tension between us from our first meet is no released in a most unexpected way.

My lips crush Alyssa, my hands are up under her tank top, exploring her lush body, Then I strip the garment from her my lips hot and passionate in their kisses, my tongue tasting the sweet, rose peddle, texture and saltiness of her skin as the trace the seductive cure of her neck to follow the gentle contour of her brassier covered breast to lick the sweet scented valley between them.

“Alyssa”

Is all I manage to whisper.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Where has he come from? Who is he? This isn’t the antagonistic bastard that has plagued and colored my last three months here. Gone were the harsh thoughts constantly directed at me. Gone the derision. In the place where these emotions once lived, I sense only a white passion and enormous need.

My fingers twine in his hair, holding his kiss to me. The moans that come from deep in my chest are mine, I realize. The hands that remove my top with such eagerness are his. His hands sear my flesh, his lips my neck, my breast.

His strangled whisper of my name is it for me. This is going to cause trouble and I don’t care.

I reach down and pull his shirt up, wanting, need to feel his flesh. Feel it against mine. I urge him up to remove his shirt, feeling the hair on his chest, touching him. When I find his neck with my mouth, I feel the shiver that travels down his body down the length of me. His weight is crushing and necessary to me, I want nothing more than to be melded into his body.

I feel the hardness of him grinding against my crotch, the excitement is almost unbearable, as I feel a new feeling coming from him in waves. I slow my movements, and look up at him, I kiss his mouth, his eyes, his chin. I let my eyes speak, offering my body, a gift. Not just to be taken in lust as we both could easily do, but as a part of me.

Now it’s my voice, strangled, that says his first name for the very first time.

“Derek, I need you.” Me. Who has never needed anyone.

 

[cgraven]

Alyssa’s fingers in my hair, her hands at my shirt the searing kiss of her soft lips on my neck sends a shiver of desire coursing through me. Alyssa, hands on my chest their gentle touch leaves fire in their wake as I strip my shirt off God the feel of her soft bare skin against me is almost more that I can stand.

Our eyes meet hers so clear, deep as bottomless as the sea the dark sea green of Alyssa’s eyes. Her lips warm passionate and giving claim mine then tender kisses bathe my face a soft longing urgency in them.

“Derek, I need you.”

In that strangled gentle whisper, something touches my soul and the pure physical need, for this young vibrant woman, some how softens to a slow burning need for her.

Alyssa I need you more than I can say.

A soft quick kiss. Standing I stretch out my hand to her. Drawing her to her feet and into my arms.

“Alyssa you look like you could use a sonic shower………..care to join me.”

Without waiting for an answer I start to strip off my uniform.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Smiling – I kick off my boots, peel off my standard issue trousers and panties, and drop my bra on my way to his bathroom before he has struggled out of one pant leg.

I let my hands touch his chest as I breeze past him, laughing, "last one in...!" The mood has lightened here, to a heady level in just a few moments.

Least the Captain gets quarters a little more spacious.

Adjusting the shower, I think I have never been so moved by a man. My emotions have ranged from disgust to anger to raging lust and passion to playfulness in what? Thirty minutes? And there is this undercurrent. I can’t put a name to it.

Hearing him at the door, I slide into the shower, and when he enters, level the hose right at his lips and thumb open the nozzle…

 

[cgraven]

Alyssa was poetry in motion a most erotic poem at that her moments sensual and seductive as she stripped out of her uniform. The touch of her long delicate fingers as she breezed by my lit a fire in my soul that I had never expected.

"last one in...!"

This strange aloof beauty’s voice light, teasing and full of merriment as she laughed, the intoxicating fragrance of her lingering in the air. I had never suspected that Alyssa had this playful side to her she had always seem so distant almost shunning any personal contact with any of the crew as if her abilities caused pain when in close contact with others. Yet al this flew from my mind with the memory of her kiss, the feel of her against me.

Hit full face with an ion stream as I entered the shower I could not help but laugh. The ion stream leaving a slight static tingle setting every nerve alive. A wicked gleam shines in my eyes as I start to wrestle Alyssa for the control of the nozzle.

“So Ensign assaulting your commanding Officer is it.”

I teas Alyssa as I wrest control of the ion nuzzle from her. Then I turn the tables on her as I spray her breast and nipples. She lurches for me and again we struggle playfully for control of the nuzzle. During that playful struggle it discharges bathing Alyssa’s sweet pussy. I have her trapped in the corner now her wrist pinned above her head, and smiling My lips meet hers and I am lost in that kiss as my arms go around her waist hugging her close to me, my body melting into hers.

 

[Annabelllee2003]

Derek’s laughter and lunge for the nozzle, is infectious. The feel of him moving against me is remarkable and the lines of his face are relaxed into the most appealing expression. One I had never thought possible to see on his normally austere face. He’s handsome, rugged and strong, not imposing. The deep hazel of his eyes shine with gold flecks. His strength is now virile - not aggressive contention as he wrestles me for control of the nozzle.

When he captures the nozzle and aims the spray at my breasts, the feeling is intensely erotic, making me lunge back into his arms to grab at it. When the spray hits my pussy and sends a jolt up my body, he clasps my wrist above my head, and kisses me.

I drown in that kiss as I feel his free arm surround me and pull me into his body. My free arm mimics his movement, snaking around his lean form to get as close as I can, my skin seeming to adhere to his. I feel him fill and stiffen on my belly and move closer still, deep in his spell.

The shower of ions spraying from nozzle forgotten in my hand is breaking and rolling over us both and no match for the sparks we give off. Our lips and bodies begin moving against each other as we start the slow dance of mating our souls cry for.

 

[cgraven]

Alyssa’s arm is around me as our kiss engulfs us both. At time our lips are crushed to each other’s as we savor the warm sweetness of our mouths at other time our tongues dance between our parted lips teasing and enticing the others to play and enjoy the sweetness of our mouth.

The ion shower nozzle forgotten our bodies move against each other my growing passion pressed to Alyssa firm flat abdomen , her pebble hard nipples biting into my chest. Our feet moving wait shifting as our mating dance commences..

My lips find the soft sensual curve of Alyssa’s neck, light kisses , soft as a butterfly’s wing, float down her neck. The tip of my tongue flutters across the tip of one, then the other of her taunt nipples. My lips suck a tender bud into my mouth, rolling it on the rough roof. I inhale deeply drawing a steady stream of cool air across the torrid, fevered bud.