Tickling as a hard limit

[Mkmydaze]

I've noticed that many subs list tickling as a hard limit for them. In fact, it seems that some would rather take part in pain-based activities (like spanking or flogging) than experience any amount of tickling.

Just curious to hear from people what their thoughts are on this. What is it about tickling that often makes it a hard limit for folks?

 

[ToPleaseHim]

I loathe being tickled and it is absolutely a hard limit for me. I am not huge on receiving pain, but will enthusiastically take a spanking or something along those lines when he wants to play that way. The loss of control while being tickled is nothing like the freedom of letting go when submitting. It’s 100% negative for me and I’m insanely ticklish. Once accidentally tickled, it is difficult for me to even be touched. It’s like everything becomes tickling. I hate it.

 

[StockingGirlJ]

So for me the the issue with tickling compared to say spanking, caning etc. is this: tickling is like a bullwhip of intensity, difficult to modulate. The feeling from spanking, and pain in general, is more controllable, depending on the implement and force used. Nipple clamps can be tightened gradually. Flame can be held closer or farther from the body. And so on.

 

[Mkmydaze]

The loss of control while being tickled is nothing like the freedom of letting go when submitting. It’s 100% negative for me and I’m insanely ticklish. Once accidentally tickled, it is difficult for me to even be touched. It’s like everything becomes tickling. I hate it.

Wow, definitely sounds too intense if that is how you experience it. Thanks for sharing.

 

[Mkmydaze]

So for me the the issue with tickling compared to say spanking, caning etc. is this: tickling is like a bullwhip of intensity, difficult to modulate. The feeling from spanking, and pain in general, is more controllable, depending on the implement and force used. Nipple clamps can be tightened gradually. Flame can be held closer or farther from the body. And so on.

I hear you StockingGirlJ, thanks for this. Do you mean that you experience all tickling as pretty much super intense (i.e. bullwhip) or that when someone has tickled you, they have done so at a very intense level? It seems to me that it is possible to modulate the intensity (difficult as you suggest) by various means - using different materials/tools to alter the sensation, choosing different bodily areas to stimulate that are not as sensitive, starting out slow and soft vs. hard and fast, etc. I do think that being able to vary the tickling sensation to "control" the experience is important, as is respecting limits and safewords.

 

[StockingGirlJ]

I hear you StockingGirlJ, thanks for this. Do you mean that you experience all tickling as pretty much super intense (i.e. bullwhip) or that when someone has tickled you, they have done so at a very intense level? It seems to me that it is possible to modulate the intensity (difficult as you suggest) by various means - using different materials/tools to alter the sensation, choosing different bodily areas to stimulate that are not as sensitive, starting out slow and soft vs. hard and fast, etc. I do think that being able to vary the tickling sensation to "control" the experience is important, as is respecting limits and safewords.

The more that I thinks about this, the more I realize that my reply probably reflects my own lack of experience with tickling more than anything. I say this because I think that controlling one's response to intense stimulation of any kind is learned and takes practice.

 

[Goldenfinger]

My wife’s not a sub, but she hates to be tickled. I’m not ticklish.

 

[lisaharlot]

Tickling is a hard limit. I get no pleasure out of it or feeing of connection giving or receiving.

 

[Mkmydaze]

The more that I thinks about this, the more I realize that my reply probably reflects my own lack of experience with tickling more than anything. I say this because I think that controlling one's response to intense stimulation of any kind is learned and takes practice.

I think you are on to something there StockingGirlJ. I would think the ability to manage/control one's response to stimulation may improve with repeated exposures. Also, if the the one providing said stimulation helps by varying the pace, intensity and bodily locales, it may not be an altogether unpleasant experience. Any time you want to practice your response to tickling, I am happy to assist you!

 

[Mkmydaze]

My wife’s not a sub, but she hates to be tickled. I’m not ticklish.

That's a pretty common response from women I've found, thanks.

 

[Mkmydaze]

Tickling is a hard limit. I get no pleasure out of it or feeing of connection giving or receiving.

So tragic. But completely understandable. Different strokes, as they say.

 

[WillowySparkles]

I've noticed that many subs list tickling as a hard limit for them. In fact, it seems that some would rather take part in pain-based activities (like spanking or flogging) than experience any amount of tickling.

Just curious to hear from people what their thoughts are on this. What is it about tickling that often makes it a hard limit for folks?

I've read through the responses, and I see where they are all coming from. Me personally, my first husband would playfully tickle me, especially when he found out I was ticklish. He'd tickle my feet, underarms or ribs, but not for any significant amount of time, and I'd never be under any hard restraints. Maybe 10-15 seconds would be the longest he'd ever tickle me. And while he would make me laugh hysterically, it wasn't to the point where I told him to never do it to me again. We were usually in a playful mood and that and other things would always lead to sex, so I count it as part of our foreplay.

Now would I react differently if I were tied down and tickled for a longer period? That's very possible, but I can only speculate as to my reaction. But I did want to share my experiences, if somewhat limited to others here.

 

[Mkmydaze]

Me personally, my first husband would playfully tickle me, especially when he found out I was ticklish. He'd tickle my feet, underarms or ribs, but not for any significant amount of time, and I'd never be under any hard restraints. Maybe 10-15 seconds would be the longest he'd ever tickle me. And while he would make me laugh hysterically, it wasn't to the point where I told him to never do it to me again. We were usually in a playful mood and that and other things would always lead to sex, so I count it as part of our foreplay.

Thanks for sharing your experience WillowySparkles, appreciate it. I think that playful sort of tickling is pretty common amongst couples, and like you say, can often be a prelude to sex. But I have to say, from my experience, that hysterical laughter is like a drug to me and just makes me want more!

 

[WillowySparkles]

Thanks for sharing your experience WillowySparkles, appreciate it. I think that playful sort of tickling is pretty common amongst couples, and like you say, can often be a prelude to sex. But I have to say, from my experience, that hysterical laughter is like a drug to me and just makes me want more!

My husband never pushed it farther than it went. It's almost like my "hysterical laughter" was his time to stop, which he always did. Maybe that's why I look at it more fondly in that light. I'm happy to have shared my memory with you and the readers.

 

[Acktion]

Would it surprise you to know that "tickle torture" is listed in A-Z of Punishment and Torture by Irene Thompson?

That there have been deaths recorded attributed to being tickled to death? (Yes, really. Caused an aneurysm, heart attack, or asphyxia.)

The Han dynasty is where most instances were recorded. But, one of the punishments in Ancient Rome was to have lawbreakers' feet dipped in salt and then their feet licked by goats. Which would cause laughter at first, but quickly passed the threshold to pain. And it carried over to most of Europe.

**shrug** I didn't know this either at first (obviously). And tickle torture was one of my favorites to engage with a lover. As you say, the laughter sparks a desire to hear more of it and the loss of control drives our need for power and control over them. And how bad could it really be if they were laughing, right?

Fortunately, I was also trained (because of work) up to EMT cert and recognized symptoms of distress in one victim/playmate. (Notably purpling face and neck and throbbing veins.) So, I put the research cap on and went digging. And, yeah... it's actually considered as dangerous if not more so than flogging.

Oh, I still use it if she (and only ever she, sorry fellas) doesn't list it as a hard limit. I do have a rather mean stripe of Sadism in my D-mix after all. But, sparingly and with a lot of attention paid to her vitals and whether she is healthy enough to withstand a bit of my favorite torture.

Which, by the way, is also a decent indication of erogenous zones as well. I don't blame you. I didn't believe it either until I noted a young lady of my acquaintance was particularly jittery about her knees. And managed to make her minigasm just experimenting with different caresses that didn't spark the tickle response on her knees.

And, damn. I just realized I gave away another of my D-type mind reading 101 secrets for free.

 

[Mkmydaze]

Oh, I still use it if she (and only ever she, sorry fellas) doesn't list it as a hard limit. I do have a rather mean stripe of Sadism in my D-mix after all. But, sparingly and with a lot of attention paid to her vitals and whether she is healthy enough to withstand a bit of my favorite torture.

Thanks for the history lesson Acktion. I had heard of the goat licking the soles torture before, but not its use in ancient Rome. The version I read about had the victim in stocks and soles kept being coated with brine, but it is basically the same idea - I guess goats love a salty treat.

And I do agree with you about the need to be vigilant about watching for signs of distress. I think giving breaks is good, or switching up to some other activity that doesn't result in her laughing so hard she can't breathe. This way the tickling parts can be dragged on longer too.

My inner sadist likes how you think Acktion! Thanks for adding to the discussion.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Having looked at the comments on tickling stories, it's clear that there are people who very much enjoy being tickled. But if one's partner is not into it, then it's like any borderline sexual activity - No means No.

 

[Mkmydaze]

No way, no how.
“But you’re laughing!”

Nope.

Thanks Faralicious.

 

[Mkmydaze]

Having looked at the comments on tickling stories, it's clear that there are people who very much enjoy being tickled. But if one's partner is not into it, then it's like any borderline sexual activity - No means No.

Of course, no one is advocating you do anything to your partner they don't consent to. Doing so would lead to trouble I think. Thanks for the comment.

 

[Deleted member 5521640]

I hate it with a passion. Hate! Hate! Hate! One guy I dated years ago thought it'd be cool if he tickled me ("I thought it'd be a cool thing to do." his words to me afterwards). Wouldn't stop even though I screamed for him to do so. He ended up making me pee myself. Nothing like a little bit of humiliation on top of that, huh? Never fucking again!

 

[Mkmydaze]

I hate it with a passion. Hate! Hate! Hate! One guy I dated years ago thought it'd be cool if he tickled me ("I thought it'd be a cool thing to do." his words to me afterwards). Wouldn't stop even though I screamed for him to do so. He ended up making me pee myself. Nothing like a little bit of humiliation on top of that, huh? Never fucking again!

Sorry to hear how that guy wronged you. I can understand why you would hate it.

 

[Mkmydaze]

I can handle all the pain, tickling is a hard limit because I have kicked (well, more like got my feet on his stomach and launched) a very large guy across the room before after he thought it would be funny to tickle me. It was not during a session, just friends goofing off. I felt so bad about it, so, yeah hard limit for me for the partner's protection, lol. (I've also kicked my husband off the bed when he tried to tickle me.)

I'm very submissive but tickling sets me off with involuntary violence it seems. As far as I know it's the only thing I react that way to and I'm not sure why.

Thanks Erozetta. I think that is a perfect explanation of why bondage is almost always used in conjunction with tickling, otherwise one or both parties may experience some sort of injury.

 

[dirtylittlecucker]

I've considered trying it. And would need to be tied down because I would do everything possible to hurt the tickler, I am certain.


@ropertrace, I am so sorry about your experience.

 

[Mkmydaze]

I've considered trying it. And would need to be tied down because I would do everything possible to hurt the tickler, I am certain.

If you really want to hurt the tickler, you tell them afterwards you were just pretending and it really didn't tickle at all

 

[WillowySparkles]

If you really want to hurt the tickler, you tell them afterwards you were just pretending and it really didn't tickle at all

This is an interesting statement. Is there a particular reason why one would want to purposely hurt the tickler? I suppose if it were non-consensual you would do that. If it were consensual however, would this still be a consideration?