30 Poems in 30 Days

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 11

.


I
will
pretend
nothing with
you, since there is no
no no possible) way for us.

We have already decided that in the next life
we still would not meet, except for this occasional kiss, our electric contact.

We will choose again to long, forever, for this bright island, to love at a slight and beautiful distance, meeting just here, just now, just this.

 

[4degrees]

18-12

lunar interlude
slit my own throat and
gurgle out poems while
you look on
from shadows, secretly
in love with the act of dying
guilt and false pride
keep you there
not close enough
and in the dark
a trickle of red spittle
paints my mouth, doll-like
somehow, somehow
the urgency within is
curbed
you're more civilized than i-
i wouldn't even try.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 12

.

I am, o sweet, that honeyed power
the rage of generosity that
makes you dive,
I will speak
you open. My hands
will argue and persuade. We
will be civilized
but I insist. Impaled, no space
unfilled, you swallow
only me and we
plant seeds in one another, digging
deep into skin
and the maddened spaces.


.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 13

Note: I wrote a piece called "Curie" back in the 5/5 somewhere. These are continuations of that theme. Hence the numbering.


Curie 2

What she doesn't know
could kill me. Already
explosive, addictive, she shouts
as if deafened
deafening.

Do not get
too close
she is full of something
dangerous. Her pale
still skin will make you
dizzy, burn
where it touches.

Am I catching her light?
She hums and glows, a tone
high in my head, her
singing blood.




Curie 3


When the light goes out
I move the dark fabric
aside, slowly, with my hand.

The light from crescent to full
is a curved line, a border of sharp shadow
glowing, a parabola for the tongue

She gets in. She keeps getting in.
Her rays batter my rebellious cells
the glow brightens my dark hand
and through those microscopic doors
the slick white surfaces
of our bones can touch
and melt.


.

 

[4degrees]

18-13

a tall black beauty
evoked forty poems
mentally, immediately
right as i lay my eyes
upon her length
poems of only one word,
the word was
art.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 14

.


It was the usual dream
except that it was you this time
and you brought a plate of food
that I didn't have time to eat.

I knew that as soon as we were alone
It would happen, but people
kept coming to the door
and the phone kept ringing
and I needed to pack for some kind of trip
and there was no time, no time.

All through it, you were
tall, two-dimensional
like a movie poster
black and white, the way I've seen you,
leaning in the doorway
iconic, waiting
patiently. I always wake up
before it happens, the food
still on the tray, uneaten.



.

 

[4degrees]

18-14

pretend i'm in pacific
or mountain time
that my poem hasn't
become a day late
by an hour short

the entire time spent
not writing, the poem was
in my mind and right
in front of my eyes
her gestures, her laugh
the way her hair hangs
like a feathery veil
it produced and mused me
incredibly
but now, i am too tired
to re-volve all those thoughts

i wasn't about to say,
excuse me--i have to go write a poem--
its almost midnight

i hope she finds her way
and her way back here
again, sometime

i know this doesn't rhyme
but my reason is that of
nature and season
tomorrow's will be better,
i will sleep on it tonight.

 

[4degrees]

18-15

a story
twisted together
a heavy rope of
fact and fiction
and things wished upon
stars and body parts
read aloud to the wide eyed
the interested absorbing
the interesting
then,
swing the axe across
from one ear to the other, slicing
the story into two halves
the next chapter needing
some serious editing
again, discrediting the
author of
skin and bad tidings.
these writings were not
meant for the eyes
of the living
if you could just
resume the forgiving
forgoing the punishment
sparing the rod
revival of your god
be your own savior
my friend.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 15

Notes on Card VI, The Lovers


It is not as easy as you think,
the alchemy of the Twins.
One brother may kill another
one father may be a serpent
and the first stories
are about children, fighting.
This is not the Lover you know.

-will I have
another lover, then? Will the One
finally come? -

Look closely: the twin holds
a bloody hammer; he is
how we kill ourselves
with judgment, with one another.

Look also: here is hooded Mercury, the alchemist
who knows that to say Twin is also
to say Sword, and their number is Two.
His serpent stretches over him
as a cloak, the crucible
for the gemini,
the killers of One.

For any pair, there is a union
of sorts. Love and fear, acid and alkali,
X and Y, Cain and Abel.
You and I
have the word as a sword.
To make one thing into two
is a murder of numbers.

For there to be two spaces
connected by a line
is the first wrong.
I bite down
on this frustrated apple
and think of you, at a distance.


.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 16

Dog

There is nothing
more real than this: the body dies
without you, after you are gone, in stages
and properly, returning to mushrooms
as it was in the beginning, becoming earth
slowly. We cover the journey in earth
as a courtesy. We draw the curtain
to give the flesh its privacy
as the small eaters do their gentle
necessary work.

No you were not breathing
it was the chemicals
of your transformation, turning you
to air and water and earth
dismantling you, efficiently, from all directions.
As it should be. As it must be.

The Man and I took turns
being near your discarded flesh
and I found I was not bitter or sad
really, as I did that most
essential work, the oldest
and most basic task,
the digging of a space in the ground
the measuring of one we love
a hole to fit a body.

I retched out all my grief, bent there
among the trees, and came out
clean, understanding you,
knowing that you regretted leaving us
knowing it was purely necessary.

I believe
you watched us work, a little
embarrassed that you'd put us
to this trouble. I averted
my face as we rolled
your golden body in, so I would
always see the side of you with fur,
the side i knew.

It is not just
a metaphor: there is never enough dirt
to fill the hole. I brought
a wheelbarrow and we lay thick
logs along the space to mark
where you had finally made
your escape. Invisibly,
you leaned on my leg and we watched
the Man roll the last log
into place. Invisibly, you touched
your nose to my palm
to ask why I was making
that strange sad howl. Invisibly
you howled with me.

 

[4degrees]

18-16

lo-ku

locusts buzz in this
muggy midwestern cavern
they come with the heat;

heat radiates from
two wet bodies, sex-twisted
like humid weather

whether you are far
or close by, still i'm wistful
of past summer days.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 17

Notes on Card VI, The Lovers

part 2

If tarot is the book,
then this page
is a wedding hymn.

Every action has an equal.
One sword is meaningless
unless there is another sword.
Raise two swords
let the tips meet,
the red drop and the white,
and you form the bridal bower
for the alchemical marriage.

not you and another, but you
united, at last, with the internal sun,
that Brahma that rests and pulses
four fingers width above the navel

that red angel that wakes and shocks
the cock awake, the figure
of yourself in small, within your belly
the heart of the pelvis
the root of you. That
is the lover. That
is the one who comes.

Let the tips meet
above, and in the center
and Juno will bring roses
and sing, there in the arch.

 

[4degrees]

18-17

my love is a cancer
growing weary with
each new day
the black cell division
the lack of sleep
restless and soulless
watch the cast bow
after the final encore
every dead man there
showers them with roses
no flowers for my love.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 18

Notes on Card VI, The Lovers

part 3



Mercury is Science, and asks
of what are things composed?
how can we combine these things
the ingredients, the blocks
to create, to move forward?

-does it mean
I will find the other half
of myself? Will I
finally be complete?-

Of what are you, of what
is the world composed?
Of four elements, GCUA
of the sixty-four hexagrams
the ten sephiroth
the twenty-two cards of the Fool's Journey
the seven hundred and twenty names of God
or nine nights hung on a tree?
Which numbers
are the holiest?

Seven sheaths of you
and the heirarchy of your needs
and the pyramid of your mortality.
Multiply by three, the dreamstates
of waking: super, ego, id.
Of what are you and I
composed? Do the doors of our cells
open where they touch
and release us
from the prison of plane, of cube,
of flesh at two separate points?

 

[4degrees]

18-18

brown skin, sun-scented
and upturned lips
looking soft as petals

-a groan does not escape
the adoration remains silent-

nearly
dare i let a name cross
my tongue, outloud?
no way, dude
just look on from a
safe distance
and in times alone,
just make believe
it's mutual.

 

[normal jean]

1-1

..................

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 19

Notes on Card VI, the Lovers

part 4

Eros here is the pure blindfolded Will
Love under Law, the deep, universal
desire to unite, to fill and be full
in the way any two bodies are ruled
by attraction, orbit. We rush and roll
all defined by distance and momentum
mass, not speed, creates the circles we run.

Mercury has two hands, sharpening east
and declining west; the speed of idea
in the cage of Time; the limbic against
the lateral; sun, moon and their meeting.
The opposites and how they whirl and sling
contain in a single sphere the singing
of stones in circles, against unlit sky.

This is the source of fire, of the gods
of wisdom and rebellion, of the gifts
of alphabet and torch and good barley.
This is the heart and the speech in tandem,
in conjunction in the Twins. The slingshot
song of our passing, plane by plane, echoes
across the zones of time. We marry for

a moment, miles away and in midair.


.

 

[normal jean]

2-2

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

[4degrees]

18-19

a poet runs out
of time, distracted by you
a day i could miss

twelve is almost here
so a forced hiaku is all
you're going to get now.

 

[4degrees]

18-20

the real poem


yesterday's filler was caused
by the hours spent
looking into your eyes-
i could not break away
for hardly a moment,
only long enough for
the above example of
extreme distraction
you are here, so close
in physical nature
i hang on every word
and laugh sincerely
at your wit
i am charmed to death
let me charm you,
be my snake and listen
hiss as i play a hypnotic
woodwind, lock
your eyes into mine
look deeply and become aware
of how i'm adoring you

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 20

.



Pearl two

knot one
length of a leg
around your waist
and pull it tight
and wind your shoulders
in the warm loop
of my arms
your tongue
hooks mine
and draws it through
and when
in weaving you want
to stretch the cords
to their full length
then thread
your arms under
my knees
and spin me up.


.

 

[the Snood]

1 - 1

You've kissed my eyes
to wake me, and I dreamed you were a dream -
a dream I wanted to show someone.
Tonight I laugh and fall to dreaming again
of the wish to show you to everyone I love,
to move openly together
in this waking dream, this nascent future,
as it wicks away sorrow and brings warmth
on rising, lover-scented air.

 

[4degrees]

18-21

see you on the streets of gotham
go underground with me
accute sonar pulls like a super magnet
more like bela,
not batman
the lair is nothing but
a construct with purpose
a place where i become
connected, and you become
a part of me
as i feast
on your lusciousness
the lust is
overpowering, the heady
fragrance of bloodfuck
makes me reel in a drunken dream
where you are my bat queen.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Summer 08 21

.



With no one to bind me
and let me rest in
those peaceful bracelets
I enchain myself daily
Perhaps it is a way to carry
my wealth, the way
Viking women did, hammered
into bright jewelry




.

 

[the Snood]

1 - 2

as the darkness about me
embraces and extends,
nearer and more tangible
is your presence.
your knowing eyes
and mischievous face,
your voice almost prayerful.

o creature of desire,
i feel your steps... i see,
on my innermost soul,
the imprint of your feet.
you come to me, wherever i am;
you appear, smiling, to kiss me
with lips of aether.

that gentle touch
of your amorous shadow
moves me to silence
and a contemplative peace.
my life quietly floats,
ecstatic and overwhelmed,
into the loving void.