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[LindsayRae]

I wonder if Ling will ever come back to read everyone's opinion (and is some case suggestions and advice!) since she started this in May and then it was bumped up. It seems she's deleted most of her (only 5) posts she's made.

 

[jennifer036]

"wrong"? not sure. I don't think so. it's a fantasy. we all have predilections. so what. it's just another body type.

 

[StrongMaster7]

I have found that there are some dominant scenarios that are more widely seen as acceptable. Most notably, in my opinion, is the black "stud" using (or abusing) the white woman, often in association with humiliating her white husband. So-called cuckolding.

I think it is an artifact of American history that reversing that is seen as racist. In fantasy, it's all fair game. If I want to imagine sexual humiliation of a woman of any race or ethnicity including using verbal epithets, that's my business. It seems to me to be an apologist point of view looking to "protect" some groups from such "exploitation". That is a form of racism, in my opinion.

I've found a lot of asian porn that involves asian men using (or abusing) asian women. Otherwise, most of the porn I've seen that has women being used (or abused) is white men on white women. Again, I think this is a wrong-headed "protection" of minority women to avoid the perception of classical white racism.

I am attracted to many asian women and could enjoy them in any scenario from extreme domme to extreme sub including verbal abuse and humiliation. The same goes for pretty much every ethnic group.

 

[BentSecrets]

I'm noticing stories involving racial abuse and humiliation are few and far between. As someone who loves reading about Asian women being racially abused by sexually dominant white men, this is sort of disappointing. In fact I've only found a handful of stories exploring this theme.

Meanwhile, there seems to be no shortage of stories about black men dominating white women but as far as stories about white men dominating women of other races (even Asian women like myself)... not so much. Why is this?

Also I'm new here so if anyone could direct me to where I can explore this interest further, please let me know.

I'd love to help you out, but having been in this precise situation before, I can tell you I'm not cut out for it.

I once dated an Asian girl who loved to be abused sexually. She enjoyed not just the basics of spanking, but of genuinely being hit--HARD. She loved being choked, loved being hit in the mouth so her lips would bleed. Doing these things to her would get her off. I once indulged her rape fantasy by "breaking" into her apartment (we'd exchanged apartment keys, there was no actual breaking) in the middle of the night, fucking her silly, choking her, smacking her face until she was bruised...and she came like there was no tomorrow.

But for me, the experience was very traumatic. Every time I "played" the way she liked, I had flashes of seeing my rat bastard father hitting my mother. I slowly grew to have recurring terrible nightmares about it, memories from childhood resurfaced and a fear that I'd become *him*. But worst of all was the feeling that I'd hurt someone I loved, and even knowing that it was for her enjoyment, even seeing her get off on it like crazy, I fell into a very hard depression. I almost never came during sex with her, instead I just faked cumming deep in her. When I'd leave to go to my own apartment I'd barely make it through the door without sobbing, I hated myself so much for it.

Eventually I broke up with her over the issue. I couldn't bear seeing her bruised, even though she loved it. I couldn't cope with seeing blood trickle down her lips or the sound of her gasping for air yet begging me not to let her breathe. It was too much, and I learned a really tough lesson about what my limits are. I can't bring myself to hurt someone, even if for them it's pleasure.

Anyway...be careful. Some people have no problem with hurting women.

 

[ProfessorCaption]

I'd love to help you out, but having been in this precise situation before, I can tell you I'm not cut out for it.

I once dated an Asian girl who loved to be abused sexually. She enjoyed not just the basics of spanking, but of genuinely being hit--HARD. She loved being choked, loved being hit in the mouth so her lips would bleed. Doing these things to her would get her off. I once indulged her rape fantasy by "breaking" into her apartment (we'd exchanged apartment keys, there was no actual breaking) in the middle of the night, fucking her silly, choking her, smacking her face until she was bruised...and she came like there was no tomorrow.

But for me, the experience was very traumatic. Every time I "played" the way she liked, I had flashes of seeing my rat bastard father hitting my mother. I slowly grew to have recurring terrible nightmares about it, memories from childhood resurfaced and a fear that I'd become *him*. But worst of all was the feeling that I'd hurt someone I loved, and even knowing that it was for her enjoyment, even seeing her get off on it like crazy, I fell into a very hard depression. I almost never came during sex with her, instead I just faked cumming deep in her. When I'd leave to go to my own apartment I'd barely make it through the door without sobbing, I hated myself so much for it.

Eventually I broke up with her over the issue. I couldn't bear seeing her bruised, even though she loved it. I couldn't cope with seeing blood trickle down her lips or the sound of her gasping for air yet begging me not to let her breathe. It was too much, and I learned a really tough lesson about what my limits are. I can't bring myself to hurt someone, even if for them it's pleasure.

Anyway...be careful. Some people have no problem with hurting women.

Aye – I've had a similar experience with an Asian woman. I'm not sure to what extent ethnicity plays a part in this, though – rape fantasies are common enough in all cultures. And some of them are just that: Fantasies. Which is fine – I like nothing better than fantasies. But indulging in them can be dangerous. I found out, soon enough, that my sexual partner had issues (as they say) which ran very deep. Sometimes a shrink's coach is a better place than a bed – though this particular woman was not willing to see that angle at all. In short, her rape and humiliation fantasies were clearly related to specific experiences in her past – and that's where I draw the line. The great thing about fantasy is that it's NOT real. Some people may be strong enough to “use” what most people would consider traumatic experiences for sheer sexual gratification, and still remain – say – mentally sound. Some. Maybe. Though I have to say I doubt it, based on my own experiences.

 

[Diana1488]

Race is a difficult issue.... it is even hard to feel able to discuss personal preferences. I am promiscuous, but if I say that I don't want sex with blacks, then I am racist, apparently. Dont I have the right of personal preference?

 

[SilverbackUK]

I think people are scared that if they indulge in this sort of thing in fantasy land they might be accused of being actually racist in real life.

It's sad because we should be able to keep fantasies and reality separate. What goes on in a story or a PM exchange or in one's own dreamland should stay there.

This.

Any white guy posting that way or seeming to like the idea is going to get jumped on by the PC brigade, big time.

Your best bet is possibly to find someone with an interest and then keep it discrete.

Cheers

 

[klippert]

I say it every time a thread like this pops-up.....

EVERYONE has a fetish

 

[haurni]

Fantasies don't always make sense or accord with our value systems, but so long as everybody involved knows that it's just play and where the boundaries are, I don't see a problem with it. If you are racist, sexist, or other -ist or -ic 'in real life', that's a problem and expect to get called on it (as you should be).

 

[dirtwrench]

Klippert is correct- everyone has some type of fetish/interest.

I think those that claim they do not, usually don't hang around Lit- they are busy at church & the local coffee shop passing judgement on the rest of us.

 

[vibes]

- they are busy at church & the local coffee shop passing judgement on the rest of us.

That's an interest too

 

[dirtwrench]

Yes, Vibes, it is. But what can I say? Deep down I'm just a pervert. lol.

 

[jmarx20102012]

Does this have anything to do with that Brad Paisley and LL Cool J song, because it is really awful.