A non sexual question for the guys

[Samuari]

If "not nice" = evil then cool!

I ran off at the mouth, too. I took what for you was just a figure of speach and turned it into a problem that didn't exist. I have been so happy with the responcable way you have conducted yourself in this matter, tjhat I was really surprised by what I thought you said. I'm glad you didn't say it. Now I've troughly confused myself again...and I hope that was an invitation to get to know you better.

 

[Ezzie]

Feel free to talk to me...

I'm an open book most of the time but I occasionally close up and don't talk but I'm always willing to try. Feel free to ask me anything, I'm always up for making new friends.

 

[Samuari]

freinds then it is. see ya arround.

 

[MinkSoul]

Thank you for saying you're proud of me. That's one thing not many people will tell me. They call me iresponsible and immature because I won't "force" the father of the baby to commit to me. I make ends meet on my own, I don't need him if he chooses to not be a part of his child's life. Like you said before, it's all about choices and whatever he decides to do is something HE has to live with. Anyway, thank you again. I'm proud of me too.

Irresponsible??? Immature??? WHAT????? Those people who said that should pull their heads from out their Butts. Bringing a new life into the world and taking on the responsability of raising a childdon't sound all that immature to me. I don't know how old you are but ...... Lady you have a whole lot of respect from me.



by the way..... i STILL think pregnant women are Sexxy...

 

[Samuari]

See! I KNEW that I wasn't the only one. now stop that fussing and let me rub your aching feet, er back, er...

 

[Ezzie]

I'm 25, Mink

And that's why I'm being called immature. My family and some of my friends think I'm stupid for bring a baby into the world knowing that there is a chance the father won't be around. For a while, I was starting to think I was stupid too. But then I realized who are they to tell me what to do? They don't pay my bills or give me a place to live. I do that on my own. They don't have to deal with the emotional and physical strain this puts on me and my body. I don't ask them for special treatment. I know for a fact that I can do this, with or without the father or them. I don't need additional problems from them. I have my moments when I think to myself "My God, what am I doing?" and then it hits me, I'm living my life for me, not them.

But I still don't feel sexy, I feel like fat duck the way I waddle around. LOL


Now, Sammi, as for the foot or back rub? It's my lower back, can you rub it for me? hehehe

 

[Samuari]

Your wish is my comand

But I still don't feel sexy, I feel like fat duck the way I waddle around. LOL


Now, Sammi, as for the foot or back rub? It's my lower back, can you rub it for me? hehehe

Well waddle over here you sexy duck. Here let me help you on to the message table. I'm going to pull your shirt up enough to expose your lower back (don't want you getting cold).

Revell's Bolero comes on to the sound system as puor the warm jasmine scented oil onto your back, and starting at your spine, begin to ease the sorness out...

 

[Ezzie]

I love this place

It's the only place I know where people would willingly rub my back without me whining or crying from the pains of my body. You guys sure know how to make a pregnant woman feel 110% better about herself. Thank you.

 

[Guest]

<Peeking my head in...>

(((((((((Ezzie)))))))) Luv ya hon.

 

[Samuari]

Re: I love this place

It's the only place I know where people would willingly rub my back without me whining or crying from the pains of my body. You guys sure know how to make a pregnant woman feel 110% better about herself. Thank you.

Glad to be of service, mamm. Call again, anytime. ssshh, I used rub Madam S's back and feet, so I have lots of practice. Seriously, if you get into that kind of blue funk again, email me...really.

 

[Cyan BloodsBane]

Well, looks like I have lots of questions to answer so here goes...

First off, yes he knows I'm pregnant and he's decided to stick by me.

He's never been married, he's only 22. I've been married and seperated/divorcing for almost 20 months.

I want the whole relationship, you know, the sleep overs, I love you's, things like that but it seems like he's a little resistant and I don't want to force him into something and then scare him off for good. I do love him, I'm not so sure I'm IN love with him (I believe there's a big difference.) but yes, I wish he would become a permanent fixture in our lives.

I guess it's a lot more complicated than I thought and I'm a little too shy to just out and tell him what I want so maybe the best thing to do is let nature run it's course and see what happens. Thank you all for the advice, it's greatly appreciated.

That could be on of the problems there... if his only 22... BUt I can't say for truth.. for I got married at 19... heheh

 

[Samuari]

Still have that oil warm...

 

[Ezzie]

Awww Sammi, you are the best!

Now Cyan, don't misunderstand me. I don't want to get married to this guy. I've been down that path before, I too was married at a young age and know how hard it can be. That's why I'm divorced. Now, as for the father of this baby, it's hard to tell what he's thinking or doing. As I've said before, he's not around much. I've pretty much given up on a relationship with him other than friendship and that's ok with me. I've been told over and over again that there are plenty of men out there willing to take on the challenges of dating a pregnant woman. And until the baby's daddy decides for sure what he wants out of this, I plan on dating and having fun while I can because everyone knows that after the baby comes, it takes a while to get back into the swing of things. I'm not about to sit around for the next 5 months being alone and feeling sorry for myself. I just need to shake the depression and hopefully I can do that soon.

 

[gordito]

The inevitabilities in life

I once had the president of a major university tell me that the cause of a lot of peoples problems came from arguing with the inevitable. In a matter of months you are going to have a child whether you and the father are ready or not. All of the posts I've read the advice has been sound and good, but as you well know all of the emotional baggage you are so worried about now will quickly go by the wayside and will go into the memory books. Even though you say you want a relationship with the father, you know in your heart of hearts that it is you that is going to have to take care of this child. The modern description of the family is the support system that you have built around you to help you in taking care of the physical and emotional needs of your family. In these times this support system is amost always those other than your blood family since our society is so mobile.

Do I ever argue with the inevitable? Yes, and every time I loose. It is just one of those things in life like the sun coming up in the morning. Obviously, it is not my place to tell you what to do but you know that there will come a time that just making it through the day will be of major concern. If you can have clean diapers, enough food on the table, a roof over your head, and all the bills paid so that when you flip the switch your lights will come on. As time goes on and the birth gets closer,you know that these things we are discussing now will fade and you will set a new list of priorities. The major events in life seem to take on a life of their own and there is nothing you can do to stop them.

What ever you decide to do, the decisions you make will ultimately make you feel better about your situation and help you in the future. There are people out there who can help you through this and will be a part of your support system.

You cannot make the father feel any differently than he does right now. If there is anything in life I have found out and that is that you cannot change another person. It is far easier for you to take care of yourself and just accept him where he is. He may or may not change. His change is not your responsibility.

As with any one who gives their advice on this board you will reach out to those who you trust in your gut. The first 20 to 25 years of anyone's life seem to be the prep for real life. You seem to have been delt a pretty good dose of reality and you are just 25. Seek help from those that have been through your situation and have come through it better people.

Sorry I have rambled on, but what is not being put into words is that this may be a real time of uncertianty for you and it sounds to me like you could use some form of anchor or stability in your life. I hope you find it.