AHHH.... the AirBorn Express guy just saw me Naked!!!
- Thread starter Jade
- Start date
Originally posted by ShyGuy68:
Jade
Hmm I would love to watch you instead of the image I have in my head. It's much more interesting to watch real persons, than what my mind make up!!
ShyGuy
I'll try not to dissapoint (sp?... didn't get much sleep!)!
hmmm, Gil was it?
what would be so bad about sleeping on my stomach.... I just don't get it......
(batts eyelashes).
nurse... what a post!!
anyone I missed that made smart ass comments about wanting to be delivery-people to see someone (like me for example) naked... I love you little pervs you are the best! And oh, ya missed a good show......
whoever asked if he was cute... yeah sorta actually, kind of a wild one he was!
~Jade
(possibly not much longer.. sigh)
Svedish_Chef
On Walkabout
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Why can't I get a job let alone a job that does pay so well!
Gil I did read the Bob bashing. Found it very interesting. Not offended by it but what the hell do you do with the real ones? That's the real Bob's!
I agree that if your delivery person is the opposite sex and I guess for some people the same sex, your supposed to invite them in fuck their brains out and then write a story for Literotica.
I agree that if your delivery person is the opposite sex and I guess for some people the same sex, your supposed to invite them in fuck their brains out and then write a story for Literotica.
CreamyLady
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Many years ago, I opened the door to the telephone installer wearing a transparent nightgown; I'd been to a party the night before and wasn't quite up to thinking at 8:00 a.m.
He was a doll; tall, blonde, and -- when I discovered that my escort of the previous evening had taken my wake-up joint -- he went to his truck and brought back his own stash, rolling one for me.
The phone eventually got installed, and we saw each other off and on for a while. Wow . . . what a morning . . .
He was a doll; tall, blonde, and -- when I discovered that my escort of the previous evening had taken my wake-up joint -- he went to his truck and brought back his own stash, rolling one for me.
The phone eventually got installed, and we saw each other off and on for a while. Wow . . . what a morning . . .
Well Flying Bob, we could call them something mundane like Bob1, Bob2, etc. ...or we could just sell them all into slavery, sort of auction them off and let the girls here rename them, sort of thing.
As far as writing about our naked experience with the delivery people... just remember you asked. This is the considerably shortened version of what happened:
As I chased after the nubile UPS girl shouting, "My package...my package", I tripped over my remaining testicle <If you want to know what happened to the other one you'll have to go look it up in the past 'Phone Sex' thread.
I quickly executed a forward double tumble roll rising gracefully into a full plie, at which point the UPS girl maced me, shouting "back off, perv!" Temporarily blinded, I stumbled back into the rose bushes.
While attempting to extricate myself, my vision was restored sufficiently to witness the UPS girl sail my package off into the blue. It arched gracefully over my now profusely bleeding body, landing with a wet smack in my neighbor's newly laid concrete patio. Dismayed and squinting, I watched it slowly submerge.
"Damn", I recall thinking "there go the vibrating pink panties I planned to send Roger the Rachel for his birthday."
Finally freeing myself from the clutches of the "Trotsky's Red", hybrid thorn bush, I staggered to the sidewalk. While assessing the numerous stratches and punctures now peppering my bleeding body, I looked up with almost fully restored vision in time to see the UPS girl mount her truck and gleefully burn rubber on the asphalt end of my driveway. A single digit waving from the end of her hand depending out of the window of her vehicle, signaled her response to our brief romantic interlude.
As I slowly limped back to the house, I slipped and fell face first into a large and fetid pile of recently produced dog shit which apparently had been thoughtfully left for my perusal, by the bitch next door.
Anyway, please excuse me if I don't post the longer version of this to the story board. Frankly, this incident has left a somewhat foul taste in my mouth.
As far as writing about our naked experience with the delivery people... just remember you asked. This is the considerably shortened version of what happened:
As I chased after the nubile UPS girl shouting, "My package...my package", I tripped over my remaining testicle <If you want to know what happened to the other one you'll have to go look it up in the past 'Phone Sex' thread.
I quickly executed a forward double tumble roll rising gracefully into a full plie, at which point the UPS girl maced me, shouting "back off, perv!" Temporarily blinded, I stumbled back into the rose bushes.
While attempting to extricate myself, my vision was restored sufficiently to witness the UPS girl sail my package off into the blue. It arched gracefully over my now profusely bleeding body, landing with a wet smack in my neighbor's newly laid concrete patio. Dismayed and squinting, I watched it slowly submerge.
"Damn", I recall thinking "there go the vibrating pink panties I planned to send Roger the Rachel for his birthday."
Finally freeing myself from the clutches of the "Trotsky's Red", hybrid thorn bush, I staggered to the sidewalk. While assessing the numerous stratches and punctures now peppering my bleeding body, I looked up with almost fully restored vision in time to see the UPS girl mount her truck and gleefully burn rubber on the asphalt end of my driveway. A single digit waving from the end of her hand depending out of the window of her vehicle, signaled her response to our brief romantic interlude.
As I slowly limped back to the house, I slipped and fell face first into a large and fetid pile of recently produced dog shit which apparently had been thoughtfully left for my perusal, by the bitch next door.
Anyway, please excuse me if I don't post the longer version of this to the story board. Frankly, this incident has left a somewhat foul taste in my mouth.
GIL:
Too funny...now that is a romantic interlude that shouts "Literotica Story-Line" you could finish it off with the UPS girl's return the next day and many more trips, tumbles and falls ending in some kind of Domination delivery by her....
So sad, yet I felt like someone that laughs when you see a person trip and fall... sad and glad it is not me at the same time.
Funny.
Too funny...now that is a romantic interlude that shouts "Literotica Story-Line" you could finish it off with the UPS girl's return the next day and many more trips, tumbles and falls ending in some kind of Domination delivery by her....
So sad, yet I felt like someone that laughs when you see a person trip and fall... sad and glad it is not me at the same time.
Funny.
Magic Merlin
Literotica Guru
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You never know Thumper? A sheer nightgown along with a silly walk just might do it.
Magic Merlin
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and now for something completely different!
"How Not to be Seen"
"How Not to be Seen"
LOL @ Thumper!! My husband was doing pizza delivery for a few months, and he never saw anybody nekkid, either. He's still complaining about it! One of the other drivers saw a naked lady on his first night, though. Hubby wants to know why can't people be nicer to pizza drivers?
Gil, thanks for the explanation and the story line. I think I now understand what this is all about or do I. Kind of like country music all about the dog, a truck my ex-wife and bull riding. Or is that bull slinging? Great story> I hope the tatse is gone and that you'll have many more stories for us virgins to read? To think all this over a deliveryman!
creamy- hell of a story!!
About pizza delivery guys/gals gettin some.... anyone ever seen that cheesy 80's movie about the young college kid who is an escort disguised as a pizza delivery guy who knows it's a "special" call when the person on the other line orders "extra anchovies"?
~Jade
About pizza delivery guys/gals gettin some.... anyone ever seen that cheesy 80's movie about the young college kid who is an escort disguised as a pizza delivery guy who knows it's a "special" call when the person on the other line orders "extra anchovies"?
~Jade
Hectate... yes, well her friend recommended the "service" to her and so she went to a hotel for it and then he saw her before she saw him so he had to walk out a window and tried to get this other guy who was buff and good looking to go up there in his place!
LOL.. it was so funny!
~Jade
LOL.. it was so funny!
~Jade
Dixon Carter Lee
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Isn't Kirstie Ally in that sucker?
Magic Merlin
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Wasn't that Kate Jackson of Charlie's Angels?
<How embarrassing to know that
>