Are all subs desperate for their doms?

[Recidiva]

Desperation isn't something I experience any more. I used to. I experience longing, certainly. But desperation has passed, as I'm assured of certain truths to be upheld and created. Desperation is counter productive to the creation of security in the role I want to fulfil for myself and my partner, and the faith in what I wish to create.

I've had cycles of experiencing desperation and doubt and finding out that they were unfounded and part of my emotional spinning and drama. It usually meant I had no faith in myself or my partner and I was leaping to the lowest common denominator.

Desperation to me would now be akin to fear of starvation with a full refrigerator and a full bank account.

This isn't to say I wasn't desperate before I was able to build it to the level of experience and blessed abundance I have now. I was. In my weakest moments I still am, but I know it's fear and not reality.

Is your desperation borne of fear or reality?

 

[silent_subbie]

Thats hard to say because i am new in this, but i feel always desperate for those who i love, especialy my husband. So if i had a Dom i guess i would feel the same way about him, i always do this once i know someone too well and like him too much.

 

[twysted73]

No bearing whatsoever

There is "a love," and then there is "in love." i am the second of the two as far as my relationship goes. We have not met yet in person, though i fail to see how that has any bearing on my feelings.

I was curious as to how you maintain the connection. I've been approached by others who asked me to long distance collar them and I had to pass on their offer as I knew next to nothing about upholding desired levels of attention without direct interaction. I wonder how I'd go about doing such a thing. Is there somewhere I could look to find info on this topic?

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[HottieMama]

I was curious as to how you maintain the connection. I've been approached by others who asked me to long distance collar them and I had to pass on their offer as I knew next to nothing about upholding desired levels of attention without direct interaction. I wonder how I'd go about doing such a thing. Is there somewhere I could look to find info on this topic?

Hmmm..maintaining the connection?? Talking, spending time together on the phone, online whatever... Having little rituals that put me in the right "frame of mind" and serve as reminders for me. Lots of things that add up to a really great relationship.

If you want to make it work, you do whatever you can.

 

[SubKekiLee]

Hmmm..maintaining the connection?? Talking, spending time together on the phone, online whatever... Having little rituals that put me in the right "frame of mind" and serve as reminders for me. Lots of things that add up to a really great relationship.

If you want to make it work, you do whatever you can.

exactly.. I agree with Hottie Mama, when your in this type of relationship ( BDSM) I think distance has nothing to do with feelings. You can spend time online, phone, text, email or anything to facilitate the relationship if you love someone distance has no issue no bearing for me either, as MY D currently lives about 30 mins away but within the month we will be 2500 miles apart and nothing is going to change.. I think my feelings will deepen if anything,

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

Hmmm..maintaining the connection?? Talking, spending time together on the phone, online whatever... Having little rituals that put me in the right "frame of mind" and serve as reminders for me. Lots of things that add up to a really great relationship.

If you want to make it work, you do whatever you can.

Again, you could be speaking for me HM In addition, I remember my father telling me that absence made the heart grow fonder and I wholeheartedly believe that.

 

[HottieMama]

i think Twysted was actually trying to ask another question, but didn't put it into words...therefore i won't answer it.

 

[NALA CAYENNE]

i think Twysted was actually trying to ask another question, but didn't put it into words...therefore i won't answer it.

There you go Hottie! Answer nothing under assumption

 

[Sir_Joe]

any desperate lady with need to have online dom

feel free to contact me, i know this is the lamest trick to get anything but

[i'm only posting to get 100 posts so that i can have an avatar like others]

 

[silent_subbie]

...........

 

[twysted73]

lame trick *smiles*

at least you are honest

i think theres nuthing wrong about online Dom's

I agree. It's a good source for interraction, practice, like "R/L - Lite". (not meant to belittle the very real feelings felt and created during such exchanges mind you)
~ Ugh...I think the PC machine was one of the worst inventions ever created. It's frankenstein's monster. Way out of control.~

*notes i'm over in the bushes and way off track*
I've been thinking about online instruction to get a feel for my style. I can apply my current level of knowladge and someone could be arecipient if they so chose.
It sounds interesting until the opportunity arises where I can do so in r/l.
I once had a run at submission in r/l with the now ex wife. Dom/mes...choose your partners wisely. (didn't go so well) Live and learn.

 

[HottieMama]

I agree. It's a good source for interraction, practice, like "R/L - Lite". (not meant to belittle the very real feelings felt and created during such exchanges mind you)
~ Ugh...I think the PC machine was one of the worst inventions ever created. It's frankenstein's monster. Way out of control.~

*notes i'm over in the bushes and way off track*
I've been thinking about online instruction to get a feel for my style. I can apply my current level of knowladge and someone could be arecipient if they so chose.
It sounds interesting until the opportunity arises where I can do so in r/l.
I once had a run at submission in r/l with the now ex wife. Dom/mes...choose your partners wisely. (didn't go so well) Live and learn.

i'm gonna come over in the bushes with you....

There is a BIG difference between "online Doms" and a long-distance relationship. LD relationships are real. They exist in the vanilla world as well as the kinky world. My relationship will not be online forever, but it will probably always be long-distance of some sort. That is life. It is only because of my personal circumstances that we have not met in person yet, but will in the not too distant future.

i would never enter into a relationship where there was no possibility of taking it into real life.