Blood Lustre (Poetic Playground of Darkness)

[monique_minx]

Goodbye Grandad

I hope I have the strength to read this at the funeral, I hope it's not hated by my family...

Goodbye Grandad

Goodbye is never easy to say,
And harder when you’ll never say hello again.
But it’s just a question of time,
A simple matter of when.

Dying begins with life’s first breath,
And you don’t get a parade.
No thunderbolt will strike, no bell will sound.
But the love will never fade.

Love is eternal,
Love is forever
Though we are apart
We remain together

Memories will always bring about emotion,
They’ll make you laugh, smile and even cry.
But they also do something rather extraordinary,
They keep a loved one very alive.

So say how you feel about him,
Tell him how much you cared.
How you’re sad he’s gone
And didn’t get to say what you’ve shared.

For we are all in shock,
Can’t believe he’s not here.
Not telling the family stories,
Not ordering a beer.

Now to tell a special moment,
That transpired between him and I.
Though I try not to think about it,
Because it makes me cry.

I once asked grandad for his help,
With my assignment for school.
To tell me about the great depression,
About which; he was no fool.

He told me what he remembered,
How it was when he was five.
All the hard times he went through,
And how he came out the other side.

And together we wrote pages of notes,
I flew through my assignment because it was real.
Because the way grandad told it,
Really made me feel.

That’s how he was with everything,
He was a great Aussie and a good man.
A friend to everyone who knew him,
Always keen to lend a hand.

He could never fail me,
He was a hero in my eyes.
He will always be that hero,
Cause a hero never dies.

And I might cry when I think of him,
Cause I am sad that he’s not here.
But I will smile in the end,
Because a drop of joy goes with each tear.

Just for knowing him I am blessed,
And without him I wouldn’t have been born.
So I know I am grateful to him for a lot,
And for all those reasons do I mourn.

I look at Nana and I see undying love and strength,
I look at my father and see a bit of grandad.
I look at Aunty Glenda and notice the daughter in her,
And us grandkids who are all so sad.

So grandad here’s to you,
A fair dinkum Aussie no doubt.
We’ve all lost a man we treasure,
And the hard lesson is to learn to live without.

We’ll all see you someday,
Holding open a gate with a smile.
Welcoming arms waiting for each of us,
Now that’s what is worthwhile.

Goodbye Grandad, we love you.

 

[monique_minx]

All Of Me Is For Your Leisure

This is a song I wrote, I haven't had a chance to smooth out the wrinkles in it yet and no music comes with it - sorry! I hope everyone likes it please be kind, it's only the second song I've ever written and I usually stick to poetry for a reason heh.

All of me is for Your leisure

Verse One

The first words to leave your lips
Start to make me drip, drip, drip
Oh baby whenever you’re around?
I can’t control myself, you got me down.

You take your time, I hurry up
The choice is mine but you make it tough
And every sentence is a trick I know
But baby that’s just another place I need to go

When the fire starts to burn and my thighs start to ache,
You start to yearn and make me quake
Cause baby I know I’m a fool for you,
And you exploit it in everything you do!

Chorus

You make me powerless, you make me scream
You make me cum, you make me cream
You know you own just about everything.
My orgasms, my pain and pleasure
All of me is for your leisure.

Verse Two

At your wish, I sink to my knees,
Call me a whore, baby please
You make me weak in all kinds of places,
You send me running different types of races.

A vicious tug on my hair,
Makes me scream, oh how you scare.
You walk around me, swinging that belt.
You make me shiver, you make me melt

Chorus

You make me powerless, you make me scream
You make me cum, you make me cream
You know you own just about everything.
My orgasms, my pain and pleasure
All of me is for your leisure.

Verse Three

I can’t hold you back,
A strangled cry, a little crack
My head just snaps back
I want you to find my centre,
Begging you to please just enter

Fuck me hard
Take me completely
I’m crying please
And begging you sweetly

Chorus

You make me powerless, you make me scream
You make me cum, you make me cream
You know you own just about everything.
My orgasms, my pain and pleasure
All of me is for your leisure.

All of me is for your leisure!

Verse Four

Make me stumble, make me plead…
Cut me up and make me bleed
The choice is yours and I ain’t defiant
You force me to crumble, you make me pliant

Your little fucktoy begs her Master
Please don’t tease
Please go faster!
Fuck me,
Own me,
Make me yours.
Here I am, down on all fours!

Chorus

You make me powerless, you make me scream
You make me cum, you make me cream
You know you own just about everything.
My orgasms, my pain and pleasure
All of me is for your leisure.

All of me is for your leisure!

Oh yeah…your pleasure, all of me is for your leisure baby…

~ Monique_Minx 04/08/2010 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

This is a poem I wrote for my Sinful Ausus awhile back, a symbol of our friendship

My Sinful Beauty

She is light,
She is purity.
Beautiful star,
Diamond-like infinity.

My girl is loving,
My girl is warm.
She is desirable
Like the dawn.

My Sinful is precious,
A brat she may be.
But I still love her,
Even when she makes trouble for me.

My Beauty makes me laugh,
She always makes me sigh.
My girl is like the setting sun,
Or a delightful lullaby.

So my darling lady,
Delight of my day.
Whenever you are down,
You just walk my way.

I will do my best to listen,
Hug you close and dry your tears.
Tell you that you're gorgeous,
And allay your fears.

I will always have your back,
Cause I know you got mine.
I will defend you viciously,
And pull the bitches into line.

You will always be protected,
I shall forever adore you.
And if you need anything,
You know I will do that too.

I love you my sweet girl!

~ Monique_Minx, 2010 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

For the night I saw a deadly rage in my father's eyes and it was directed at me...

Relatively Merciless

So I see you wanna hit me,
Then fucking hit me.
Nothing left to see,
You left me with nothing to be.

I see the rage burn in your eyes,
Fury dripping from the skies.
Kill me cause everything fucking dies.
And you won’t have to hear my cries.

Throw the fucking plate
I won’t sit and wait
I’ll keep it up and I’ll fucking bait,
Til your shitty anger dissipates.

Jump on the grenade
No one asked for your aid
But you think I need to be saved
And then fucking flayed.

I can see how much you want me dead
How you want to bury the axe in my head
And you want to see my blood spill red
Covering the sheets on my bed

So fucking do it!
Nothing to it!
No remorse to hold you back
Watch my vision fade to the black.

I can see your mind turning,
You can hear my stomach churning
Want to spill my entrails out?
I know what you’re thinking about!

The knife’s in the draw
Just pull it out a little more
Take it and step through the door
Pressed to my throat, even the score.

You want an instruction?
Serve my destruction!
I can see what you want,
You’re so nonchalant

So can you kill me?
No, you walk away from me.
Well thanks a bunch daddy,
Sparing your daughter is lovely.

Now just fucking stab me…

~ Monique_Minx, 2010 ~
​

 

[monique_minx]

Almost Like I Have A Conscience

It grows like an urge,
An insatiable thirst.
An unmovable wisp of air,
A piece of memorabilia you can't bear to throw away and yet, you don't want it anymore.

Why can't I be rid of it and why won't it leave?
I love it and hate it all once and no one seems to know my pain,
No one seems to know my sorrow.

I turn from light because there is only dark and seem to bury me within myself.
But it's almost like I have a conscience.

~ Monique_Minx, 2004 ~ ​

 

[monique_minx]

No Voices

No voices left to scream at me,
No love left for shame.
And all this time you lied to be,
Someone with no name.

A love that's lost cannot come back,
And somewhere yours lost its way.
So one part of my heart is pitch black,
And withering away.

The feeling is rough and tearing,
Why do you not care?
How is it fearing,
What is not there?

I wish you'd let me live my life,
You're always so over-caring.
Why can't you just be dad's good wife?
And not so over-bearing.

I hate that you always yell,
And I cry myself to sleep.
You say that I can always tell
You what makes me weep?

But you are the only thing,
That really makes me cry.
I used to sing and sing and sing,
And now I only lie.

When I have done you wrong,
You make me feel so bad.
And the look you give is so strong,
I feel terribly sad.

I want to be 4 once more,
And live in your lap.
But when I reached 5 I swore,
Never again to nap.

Why can't all the pressure,
Simply disappear?
When its all good measure,
I'm shaking with fear.

~ Monique_Minx, 2004 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

Mirror Mirror the 2nd Frame

Mirror Mirror; The 2nd Frame

Mirror mirror on the wall I'm crying now, please break my fall.
I'm screaming cause I've grazed my knee,
What I wouldn't do for some company.

Its lonely now, you've gone away.
Its settled in, it's here to stay.
There is just but one word to describe it all,
It is extremely horrible.

The number of times you said you'd come back,
I hope and hope until all is black.
There is no sun but I keep on shining,
The year is young, it's all about timing.

And while I wait for you my dear,
I'll wish my wish and cry a tear.
And contemplate nothing but love,
While I wait for you here my dove.

~ Monique_Minx, 2004 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

So I Won't Fall

You make me smile as you laugh,
I sing of you in my heart.
When you hug me; I feel warm,
When you shove me; I feel torn.

A kiss is what my heart desires,
To ask me out could light some fires.
I only want love in return,
To have something so I won't burn.

So I won't fall...

~ Monique_Minx, 2004 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

Only Tears

Only Tears

I'll spend my days lonely and sad,
All because I get a little bit mad.

I'm forever crying and never smiling,
I just keep going on like I'm styling.

But things keep going wrong I just don't get,
And every time they do I get sensitive and upset.

Life's not worth living if I keep dying,
Life's not worth living every time I start crying.

~ Monique_Minx, 2005 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

Not One Of Them Will Ever Know

The grasping love in your touch,
Makes me want you oh so much.
Hopeful that you'll hold me too,
And cuddle me as you often do.

But instead you pull away,
Not a word for you to say.
Tears are falling from my eyes,
You don't explain all the whys.

I look at you with a hopeful face,
But not a flicker of your grace,
See I from your wandering lips,
Makes me wish you'd hold my hips.

But no you just turn your back,
You make my world darken black.
I don't know where I went wrong.
I just keep missing you when I hear our song.

Why do others seem to care,
When you run your fingers through my hair?
Not one of them will ever know,
The love we share is more than we show.

They cannot feel all our pain,
We look at each other with disdain.
Cries of feeling hear me now!
I cannot bear this love, it's...wow!

It hurts me here inside my gut,
But I can't escape my little rut.
So I keep running always to you,
Never knowing what I should do.

Hoping we can be together,
Someday, not now, but forever.

~ Monique_Minx, 2005 ~ ​

 

[monique_minx]

Memories Aren't Enough

Now I am in pain,
It's searing through my skin.
Tearing down the bone,
Rotting away my sin.

I cry no tears,
Just this burning sensation.
Peeling through my body,
Fixed on this location.

Physically it's tiring,
Mentally it's hard.
All this work I put in,
Somehow I was off guard.

Wretched is my spirit,
When I give and never get.
All these things you put me through,
I'll get it right just yet.

Solemn is my touch,
I'm working through this pain.
Let me do this on my own,
Else I'll go insane.

This is what I want to be,
I'm still finding myself.
Soon I will be right at home,
In entirely perfect health.

Remember how you were,
When you were my age.
Memories often aren't enough,
To help me through this stage.

~ Monique_Minx, 2005 ~ ​

 

[monique_minx]

Why Do You Do What You Do?

Don't say you care if you joke,
Don't say you understand cause you don't.

Don't try to impress me,
Or mentally undress me.

I hate how I love you,
You love that I do.

You use it against me,
Smiling happily.

I wonder if you care,
I run my fingers through my hair.

God you frustrate me,
Don't appreciate me.

Every time I cross you,
You make me sorry that I do.

Now we aren't talking,
And you have left me gawking.

You block my conversation,
And I lose my concentration.

I hate how I love you,
Why do you do what you do?

~ Monique_Minx ~​

 

[monique_minx]

I Seem To Freeze

Your lips run ice cold,
They're blue and glisten.
Not that you can't be told,
But you're unwilling to listen.

You can't be heard,
Although you aren't speaking.
You find this absurd,
And can't see what you're seeking.

Some kind of closure,
All you find is solitude.
A new kind of exposure,
With your new found attitude.

You close yourself off,
The world around you falls.
You hear a little cough,
But heed no one's calls.

It feels as though your heart is breaking,
You lay in bed as though you died.
Can nothing seem to stop this aching?
Someone said yes but they only lied.

The weeks dredge by on and on,
You scream for a lack of hope.
A letter but it's signed Anon,
And you don't think you can cope.

~ Monique_Minx ~ ​

 

[monique_minx]

I Fear It Alone

To die must be worthless,
To die must be wrong.
To die for pain of caring,
Is to sing your own song.

To march through fields of grey,
To march along to a tune.
To march til nothing's left,
And you feel you shall die soon.

To lie to your mum,
To lie to your dad.
To lie til your throat bleeds,
Couldn't feel so bad.

To fall and graze your knee,
To fall and hurt yourself.
To fall and keep some dignity,
Is to lose your health.

To suicide on drugs,
To suicide by falling.
To suicide and drown,
So you hear no one calling.

To sleep away your pain,
To sleep away your fears.
To sleep away your death,
So no one can see your tears.

~ Monique_Minx ~​

 

[monique_minx]

Can I Do Nothing?

Why am I so different now?
Why am I so strange?
What the hell has happened
To make everything change?

I feel as though I'm old,
And life is passing me by.
They all make me feel that way,
Every time I try.

I feel like I have failed,
Before I even begin.
Why don't I pass anything?
How come I can't win?

My parents scream at me,
And I read this book that said
No decent person can yell at a crier
My parents must feel dead.

So I am overly sensitive,
And so I can feel.
Is that any reason to think,
My scars will never heal?

I don't know why I cry,
I don't know why I'm in pain.
I just know I have to go.
Because I'm not that vain.

Why don't I get hungry?
And why do I feel starved?
I always know that I am,
Emotionally halved.

When I am angry with you
Why do I not fight?
Why instead do I cry
Day after day and night after night?

I write my feelings in my poetry,
But subtlety doesn't work.
No one seems to notice,
Any sort of quirk.

And the difference between you and me,
Ladies and gentlemen is this.
All you want to do is fight,
But I just want a loving kiss.

~ Monique_Minx ~​

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

From Deviant Art

Lunatic Fringe (2005)

I am trying
to keep insanity at bay
but echoes in my head
have decided tis time to play

Hundreds of voices in my head
Takes my blackness, sprays it red
Fills me with despair and dread
No choices in the voices
The many thousand dead

*A whisper of murder, mayhem and fright
Just fear deep inside in the dark of the night

I am trying
to keep this hatred locked away
though my chain does slip
at the end of the day

Yet the voices~
Still, the voices in my head
My heart beats on, though I feel dead
These voices (and choices)
work quickly to renew my dread

*The whispers of a lunatic have come on through
I still fear for my sanity, but I worry about you.

The voices say tis a good day
For the white walls to turn red
The blood I see is not from me
Uh-oh I think you're dead.

SHIT!!


Suicide Solution (2005)

A pill bottle
calling my name, offering me solace, peace
Eternal rest
a missed breath which would last forver
Solutions
that come from the red flow of an opend vein
Perhaps
the sleep that lasts for an eternity
A dive
into misery and out into the void of nothing

(which already feel like cats paws on my cheek)

A handful
of quiet contemplation followed by an end to hurt
A moment
when that which is gone, resumes it's prowl
Solutions
that come from the knowledge that no one cares enough
To stop you

(thank the gods, I was wrong)

But still, yet still
Suicide and pills
are a solution which causes a smile in my heart.


Upon My Death (2005)

Upon my death, don't weep for me
Tears won't fix this final goodbye
Upon my death, don't mourn my loss
Silent misery rides slowly by

When I am gone, forget I ever was
A part of you; a lover, a friend
When I am gone, forget my name
I have left you behind, it is the end

Upon my death, think no more
Of my smile or tears, they no longer suffice
Upon my death, think of other things
As my soul has fled, my flesh is ice


Those who have my deviant art account have seen these there...that year was VERY bad...​

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Deviant Art as well

You (2005)

Fuck you
Your snide comments, rude words, hateful ways
I have had enough
of you

Fuck you
Your lack of compassion casuses reactions
tender emotions died
from you

Fuck you
Your words, your moods, your scent
I want it gone, long gone
An end...

So yeah, fuck you
All of you, all the time
You weak willed piece of shit
Not worth the time it took to make you

Hate you, fuck you
Yea you, fuck you

 

[monique_minx]

Truly, it was a curse...

Wanted Curse

Heart to heart,
Mind to mind.
These feelings are
All so sublime.
You touch my hand,
I kiss your face.
I love your lips
And how they taste.
I hug your hips,
Your warm embrace.
Is all I want
When I touch your face.
You kiss me here,
I hold you there.
When nothing's left
And all is bare.
I love your smile,
You love my laugh.
And when we meet,
It's not by half.
You pull my hair,
I rub your arm.
Letting you know
My love won't harm.
And when we touch,
We know it's forever.
I'll never betray you,
Not now, not ever.
It's not lust,
You know as such.
I love you truly,
I love you so much.
You two are my world,
My heart and soul.
When we are apart,
I am not whole.
You two are my everything,
My entire universe.
To love you is beautiful,
My love is my curse.

~ Monique_Minx, 2007 ~​

 

[monique_minx]

http://t3.***********/images?q=tbn:9N9biBmwJkyRqM:http://www.openletters.in/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/woman_crying.jpg&t=1

When The Laughter Dies

Ever felt that sinking feeling?
When you know the jokes are done?
There's nothing left to say,
And nothing is funny, nothing is fun?
Ever felt that you were gonna die?
If only you could laugh a while
Maybe you'd recover,
maybe it won't hurt
But no one's there to smile.
When the laughter dies
And there's nothing left
So you walk back to nothing
And wish you hadn't left
So what is next you shall wonder
Endless and aimless this dance
and you wonder where you stop
But you don't, it's a trance.
When you turn around?
When the laughter dies?
And you wonder where you go?
You only hear the cries.

~ Monique_Minx ~ ​

 

[monique_minx]

27 Things I Miss About You

I miss your creepy grin,
I miss the way you always win.
I miss your great smell,
I miss the way I can never tell.

I miss your arms around me,
I miss the way you make me free.
I miss your body oh so much,
I miss the way I feel when we touch.

I miss your lips against mine,
I miss the way you look so fine.
I miss your hands as they roam,
I miss the way you make me moan.

I miss your breath on my ear,
I miss how safe I feel when you're near.
I miss how you make everything okay,
I miss the way your smile brightens my day.

I miss your everyday wit,
I miss the way we seem to fit.
I miss the way you can tease,
I miss how you make me say please.

I miss the time we'll never get back,
I miss the way you laugh like that.
I miss the way I relax around you,
I miss lying together in bed like we do.

I miss the way you can tell I lie,
I miss how you comfort me when I cry.
I miss being able to sleep through the night,
I miss the way you scratch and bite.

But most of all my darling, my lover, my guy,
I miss the three of us together, that I can't deny.

Add: Now I miss the way I don't miss you at all,
And how I will never again answer your call.
I miss another two when they're not around,
And you're not on my mind, nowhere to be found.

~ Monique_Minx, 2007 ~​

 

[princesssexci]

I Confess

I confess to missing your laughter
the way you say my name
I confess to all the teasing and the way
were not ashamed
of our love

I confess to knowing what buttons to push
to pushing them oh so well
I confess to knowing everything about you
things you didn't wish for me to tell

I confess to hating the pain I cause
the tears I've made you cry
I confess for doing those things in spite
and never needing a reason why

Lastly, I confess to my love
the thing you'll never accept
I confess to promises we made
that we never kept

~PrincessSexci 2010~

 

[Cosmic Knight]

Amy Winehouse
***
**
*


Soul blessed
By the rose of darkness
And kissed, with small silver spoon
I hide, under veil of shadow
In gaze, of ecliptic moon.

Came dawn,
Disguise of twilight
Take the pain, subside, drift away?
Did knife of thousand demons
Come and steal my life today?

Sweet peace
My solace in vapours
Rise high, with the silver tide
Mind crest, in dream unconscious
And yet, be the Devil bride

Be gone
You weed of dark lightness
Give back my night sweet caress
Pure snow is my salvation
And dark, be my wedded dress. ​

 

[monique_minx]

Nympho Bitch

Take me into the arms of hell,
Wrap me in what I love so well.
Let the flames sear it all away,
Purify this wretched creature today.

I hate her, she's completely vile,
Something to be spat on in denial.
Tear it all up and throw it asunder.
If it’s gonna be her I am under.

Do you know how you’re despised?
I can’t hear a thing above your cries.
But your screams keep echoing inside,
How I wish I could run and hide.

Try and find me then bitch,
You ain’t scratching this itch.
God you’re disgusting and pathetic,
But you’re so goddamn magnetic.

I want you to fade into nothing,
Instead it’s like you just keep coming.
More often now than you used to,
So I question what it is I do.

What has changed that makes you return?
What have I done to call you to yearn?
Where did I jump straight off the track?
Why didn’t I just walk right back?

No, I know why you come every night,
And I struggle not to let you win the fight.
But you’re a hungry addict consuming me,
I can’t see straight for what’s come to be.

You help me connect to people,
And then you leave me peaceful.
But it’s not long before you’re back again,
Because you always have to whine and complain.

You cause me such hassle and agony,
You're my eternal malady.
So how can I scratch this itch?
Won’t you tell me, nympho bitch?​

 

[monique_minx]

Delusional Inferiority

With breath that is baited,
Oh how I have waited.
Sat back in the crowd,
Watched you standing proud.

So go on and take a bow,
Cause it’s my turn now.
I will kick you off the stage,
Tear it up and watch you rage.

You’re seething in your corner,
I’m dressed as your mourner.
Eyes observe the coffin sink,
That putrid smell of how you stink.

All that manure on those flowers,
Tick tock, oh but the precious hours.
I’ll watch you scramble for a surface you can’t possibly break,
Because if no one else does, I know you’re just a fake.

I’ll rip you down and bare you to the world,
Show them your malicious intent as it’s hurled.
When the lights go out, what do you fear?
Nothing left for you but darkness, my dear.

So now I’m out to destroy you,
To return a favour or two.
Once upon a time I couldn’t take it,
Now I’m the one to make it.

I set the bar and you’ll stand or fall,
Slam you hard against a brick wall.
My reputation is undeniable,
And you’ve more than made me justifiable.

So your persona is sugary sweet,
But it will be my dust you’ll eat.
You’re a crazy psycho fucking bitch,
And I’m gonna hound your ignition switch.

I just do it better,
I wrote the book and signed the letter.
You’ll follow my lead into hallowed grounds,
Drowning in the screaming sounds.

Sounds of pain and rage and terror,
Sounds that get worse because of your error.
You made a mistake when you fucked with me,
Now open your eyes and what do you see?

Look in that mirror and take off the mask,
Do it now and do it fast.
Face yourself for what you are,
You don’t need to look too far.

The ugly inside comes out,
Asphyxiating on your doubt.
You’re a full time pity party,
Too ditsy to be a smarty.

Too good to be a whore,
Too stupid to want more.
Big fucking actress always crying,
Big fucking actress forever lying.

A plague on both your houses,
He said to fair Verona’s masses.
Well you have two, right?
One during the day and one at night.

So many psychotic personalities dwell in your interior,
You really think you’re that superior?
You’re melodramatic and off your medication,
You should see a shrink over your infatuation.

You spew so much crap and say very little,
Nothing meaningful, you’re broken and brittle.
So check it when I press my foot into your back,
Snap! Crunch! Pop! Broken back.

Consider yourself obliterated,
And let it be reiterated.
You stink, you’re psycho, you’re inferior,
I’ll always be your better, your superior.

The lights go out.
Here we go.​