Can you flip an unknown switch

[Stegral]

That being said..lol. My Dom has never asked me to tie him up and beat him. So maybe I'm talking out my ass. But, I do know that I've not refused anything I didn't really want to do as of this point.I have however performed other "activities" for other people that can be seen as me being a service top. I don't get off on it. It doesn't make me all warm and tingly..lol. But, I enjoy that it gives them pleasure. I know for some people it's a big deal. I respect that. For me..it's not.

OMF.. the bold describes me perfectly.....
it is the ONLY reason I cane & crop...
(& I am working the issues out about flogging with a denim one, yes laugh..)

 

[Stegral]

Bump, bump, bump...

no more input????

Shame...

 

[marieR19]

It's not something I would enjoy, certainly, but of course isn't that kinda the point? Anyways, yeah I'd do it if my Mistress told me to... it might take some hesitation, some mental preperation, to make myself do it, but I would. I don't like the thought of tying anyone up or hurting them, but it's not a limit, so I would do it if I was told. But it certainly wouldn't be a "switch" situation, because I wouldn't be liking it or getting pleasure from it, I would be doing it to please my Mistress.

For example, I absolutely despise being on top during sex. If I'm having sex with a partner, there are only a few very extenuating circumstances in which I'll be on top, and it's always when a Dom orders me to do so. Now, a lot of subs have this idea in their heads that it's "Dom/mely" to be on top. If sex is in the equation, they would expect me to be on top. But it's not going to happen because I don't like it that way. Refusing to be on top when I tell you to do it just because you don't think it's a submissive thing to do is essentially topping from the bottom, I think. I truly don't care what you think is "submissive." I care what I think is submissive.

Ok, wow, that's an incredibly complicated paragraph. Let me try something else.

Many subs believe that they have to be very gentle and worshipful with all of Mistress's body parts. "Gentleness" in certain areas makes me feel nauseated, to be quite honest. If I tell you to be rougher to keep me from vomiting on you, and you refuse to do it because it's not "submissive," then, again, I think it's essentially topping from the bottom.

Am I making sense at all?

Oh TOTALLY making sense! *completely agrees*


Heather

 

[Stegral]

It's not something I would enjoy, certainly, but of course isn't that kinda the point? Anyways, yeah I'd do it if my Mistress told me to... it might take some hesitation, some mental preperation, to make myself do it, but I would. I don't like the thought of tying anyone up or hurting them, but it's not a limit, so I would do it if I was told. But it certainly wouldn't be a "switch" situation, because I wouldn't be liking it or getting pleasure from it, I would be doing it to please my Mistress.

Heather

Thank you for the input.
I am glad it is possible for alot of submissives to step out of the "comfort zone" to be able to please their Mistress's on a different level.

BTW... for clarification, I wasn't asking to be tied up & beaten.
THAT is a HARD limit for me when I switch & those I Top know it.
I was interested in him using the lighter stuff (to me anyway) on my back.
Such as pinwheels, light knife play, vampire gloves/mitten, fingerspikes...
Erotic touch/sensory play for Me, I am learning to crop/spank for him.
I am a soft Top/Domme & an even wussier bottom... No pain for me TYVM...

 

[unfoundiamond]

If a switch flips in the forest and no is there to hear it...

This is in no way directed at the OP, or ment to offend, but when I read the title for this, all I could think was...

"Is this one of those "tree in the forest questions?"

Sorry for the 'jack...

Ttyl

 

[bronntanas]

I don't think it is beyond possible, but nor do I think it is necessarily switching. Catalina

Same here.

I know lots of submissives who do get sadistic at their Doms, but their head space appears to be totally different than mine when they do it. For a while I was in a poly triad that started as a Dss situation, with a masochist Domme. When we (the sub and I) started to top the D (at her request), the sub was finding fulfillment in her submission. I started out that way, but after a while, I started to crave the control and the sadism. The sub and I both enjoyed the experience, but our emotional reactions and enjoyment eventually came from two totally different areas. I eventually outgrew the relationship, but all three of us are still great friends. When we started being more DsS, it wasn't really working for all three of us.

 

[twysted73]

If a tree falls on a mime in the middle of the forrest..

Ahh forget it.

It's human behavior. Which, historically, means "anyone's guess".
You'd probably be just as successful asking how to turn a gay man strait or vice versa.
Dunno.
I suppose the question to ask is: Are the inidcations and inclinations and desire there to begin with? Can they be cultivated?
If not, then the answer is an emphatic no.

 

[Stegral]

Thank you all for the input.
I have spoken to him & he has stated he is understanding it better once I explained he wouldn't be Dominating/Topping me but rather "servicing" me in a different way. It would be at My request, on My terms with Me directing him, much like if I was to direct him in they way I wanted my feet massaged or my bath drawn. In his mind we were switching roles & THAT is what made him withdraw. Now that he understands he is serving Me, & it is My pleasure he is ensuring, it is like a lighbulb went on

I will admit I did use a few of the posts & twisted them slightly.

Now to practice what I preach...

Thanks to everyone

 

[sexycaz22]

Thank you all for the input.
I have spoken to him & he has stated he is understanding it better once I explained he wouldn't be Dominating/Topping me but rather "servicing" me in a different way. It would be at My request, on My terms with Me directing him, much like if I was to direct him in they way I wanted my feet massaged or my bath drawn. In his mind we were switching roles & THAT is what made him withdraw. Now that he understands he is serving Me, & it is My pleasure he is ensuring, it is like a lighbulb went on

I will admit I did use a few of the posts & twisted them slightly.

Now to practice what I preach...

Thanks to everyone

Oh, that's brilliant news!

Be sure to tell us all the details!!