jon.hayworth
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Dec 20, 2001
- Posts
- 765
Maybe I am being idealistic in saying this and maybe because I intend to be totally honest I will upset some people.
In my experience it is people into Vanilla sex, or very inexperienced Dom's who tend to use the term "own", without accepting the responsibilities that accompany "ownership".
I may be able to claim "ownership" of my sub. But in the first case my sub gifted herself to me, and in doing so she was making a positive statement about our relationship, and the degree of trust she has in me.
Ignoring the fantasies that are a part of the role playing that goes on in every Dom / Sub relationship and are indeed a part of the BDSM lifestyle. For the most of us, we live in societies where slavery is neither the norm nor legally tolerated. Therefore, our slaves are only slaves, for so long as they wish to be our slaves. They always have the liberty to say "game over - I am out of here".
In most Dom / Sub relationships it is the Sub not the Dom who holds the "kill-switch" - THE SAFEWORD - Ask yourself who at the negotiation stage of the relationship, (directly or indirectly), laid down the prescribed limits, and possibly proscribed certain activities and demanded others did happen.
To conclude I "own" my Sub with the caveat that this only for as long as she chooses to be owned. And in accepting ownership I accept a responsibility for her welfare, I accept her guilt, by freeing her from guilt. In all probability the duties of ownership probably fetter me more than the duties of being owned fetter my Sub.
jon
In my experience it is people into Vanilla sex, or very inexperienced Dom's who tend to use the term "own", without accepting the responsibilities that accompany "ownership".
I may be able to claim "ownership" of my sub. But in the first case my sub gifted herself to me, and in doing so she was making a positive statement about our relationship, and the degree of trust she has in me.
Ignoring the fantasies that are a part of the role playing that goes on in every Dom / Sub relationship and are indeed a part of the BDSM lifestyle. For the most of us, we live in societies where slavery is neither the norm nor legally tolerated. Therefore, our slaves are only slaves, for so long as they wish to be our slaves. They always have the liberty to say "game over - I am out of here".
In most Dom / Sub relationships it is the Sub not the Dom who holds the "kill-switch" - THE SAFEWORD - Ask yourself who at the negotiation stage of the relationship, (directly or indirectly), laid down the prescribed limits, and possibly proscribed certain activities and demanded others did happen.
To conclude I "own" my Sub with the caveat that this only for as long as she chooses to be owned. And in accepting ownership I accept a responsibility for her welfare, I accept her guilt, by freeing her from guilt. In all probability the duties of ownership probably fetter me more than the duties of being owned fetter my Sub.
jon
