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Control II

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There’s a lot of pic/gif posting in here, with some commentary on what we like or dislike, but very little discussion. Let’s try and change that, if only for a bit. I know MD would approve if she was still around.

Control.
A straightforward concept, something integral to BDSM, something we all ( obviously ) appreciate and opine on superficially. But, in that disparity of likes and dislikes, there is meaning. A reason one thing speaks to us, and another does not. Why you shudder thinking about rough fingers closing around your throat, or the implications behind each of those knots as they’re tied. Why you start drooling before the gag even touches your lips, why your heart rate picks up at the thought of cuffs being fastened, pulled tight, being locked into a chosen pose ( under or above ) until the end. Why you feel warm and squirm in your seat at the thought of that split second before an open hand/crop/paddle/cane/whip comes down and connects just as hard as you need it to, where you wanted it to. And why going about what you want and how you want it ( regardless of where you identify on the spectrum ), goes much deeper than just rough sex.

What is control to you? Why do you need it? How important is it for you? When and how did you figure it out?

Tell me. Tell each other. Tell the world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
 
_Necrosomantic_ said:
There’s a lot of pic/gif posting in here, with some commentary on what we like or dislike, but very little discussion. Let’s try and change that, if only for a bit. I know MD would approve if she was still around.

Control.
A straightforward concept, something integral to BDSM, something we all ( obviously ) appreciate and opine on superficially. But, in that disparity of likes and dislikes, there is meaning. A reason one thing speaks to us, and another does not. Why you shudder thinking about rough fingers closing around your throat, or the implications behind each of those knots as they’re tied. Why you start drooling before the gag even touches your lips, why your heart rate picks up at the thought of cuffs being fastened, pulled tight, being locked into a chosen pose ( under or above ) until the end. Why you feel warm and squirm in your seat at the thought of that split second before an open hand/crop/paddle/cane/whip comes down and connects just as hard as you need it to, where you wanted it to. And why going about what you want and how you want it ( regardless of where you identify on the spectrum ), goes much deeper than just rough sex.

What is control to you? Why do you need it? How important is it for you? When and how did you figure it out?

Tell me. Tell each other. Tell the world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
Click to expand...

Control is something I need to let go of. My grip is tight. The best feeling in the world is letting go with someone I trust.
I figured this out at an early age. What I needed. It came to fruition with you. :heart:
 
_Necrosomantic_ said:
There’s a lot of pic/gif posting in here, with some commentary on what we like or dislike, but very little discussion. Let’s try and change that, if only for a bit. I know MD would approve if she was still around.

Control.
A straightforward concept, something integral to BDSM, something we all ( obviously ) appreciate and opine on superficially. But, in that disparity of likes and dislikes, there is meaning. A reason one thing speaks to us, and another does not. Why you shudder thinking about rough fingers closing around your throat, or the implications behind each of those knots as they’re tied. Why you start drooling before the gag even touches your lips, why your heart rate picks up at the thought of cuffs being fastened, pulled tight, being locked into a chosen pose ( under or above ) until the end. Why you feel warm and squirm in your seat at the thought of that split second before an open hand/crop/paddle/cane/whip comes down and connects just as hard as you need it to, where you wanted it to. And why going about what you want and how you want it ( regardless of where you identify on the spectrum ), goes much deeper than just rough sex.

What is control to you? Why do you need it? How important is it for you? When and how did you figure it out?

Tell me. Tell each other. Tell the world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
Click to expand...


After many years of knowing something was missing, but not what I finally stumbled on the answer. I am sexually submissive and I like, no I need, to relinquish control to a man whom I trust implicitly. The act of submission in and of itself is a powerfully, symbolic event which irrevocably changes the nature of the relationship. I found comfort in knowing I could walk through 'that' door and all decisions were made for me, no choices were offered other than submit or go.
 
_Necrosomantic_ said:
There’s a lot of pic/gif posting in here, with some commentary on what we like or dislike, but very little discussion. Let’s try and change that, if only for a bit. I know MD would approve if she was still around.

Control.
A straightforward concept, something integral to BDSM, something we all ( obviously ) appreciate and opine on superficially. But, in that disparity of likes and dislikes, there is meaning. A reason one thing speaks to us, and another does not. Why you shudder thinking about rough fingers closing around your throat, or the implications behind each of those knots as they’re tied. Why you start drooling before the gag even touches your lips, why your heart rate picks up at the thought of cuffs being fastened, pulled tight, being locked into a chosen pose ( under or above ) until the end. Why you feel warm and squirm in your seat at the thought of that split second before an open hand/crop/paddle/cane/whip comes down and connects just as hard as you need it to, where you wanted it to. And why going about what you want and how you want it ( regardless of where you identify on the spectrum ), goes much deeper than just rough sex.

What is control to you? Why do you need it? How important is it for you? When and how did you figure it out?

Tell me. Tell each other. Tell the world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
Click to expand...

For me it's those moments in a loving, trusting relationships when you feel the dynamic suddenly shift, like a change in gear, like the ground momentarily falls away. Where you know he's taking control, because he simply has to have me, just the way he wants me. And giving him that control feels like a gift, and a release.
 
Well, I tried.
For those who responded,
ejredlady said:
After many years of knowing something was missing, but not what I finally stumbled on the answer. I am sexually submissive and I like, no I need, to relinquish control to a man whom I trust implicitly. The act of submission in and of itself is a powerfully, symbolic event which irrevocably changes the nature of the relationship. I found comfort in knowing I could walk through 'that' door and all decisions were made for me, no choices were offered other than submit or go.
Click to expand...
Kat1980 said:
For me it's those moments in a loving, trusting relationships when you feel the dynamic suddenly shift, like a change in gear, like the ground momentarily falls away. Where you know he's taking control, because he simply has to have me, just the way he wants me. And giving him that control feels like a gift, and a release.
Click to expand...
I appluad your articulating your feelings and thoughts on the subject, and appreciate your candor. Your words are far more enticing and valid than any picture that could be posted in here.
Especially
Farawyn said:
Control is something I need to let go of. My grip is tight. The best feeling in the world is letting go with someone I trust.
I figured this out at an early age. What I needed. It came to fruition with you. :heart:
Click to expand...
💛💙

As for the rest, I’ll return you to your steady diet of not thinking and gawking at other peoples ideas of what Control or BDSM is because it’s easy to blah blah who gives a shit anymore, internet gifs.
 
_Necrosomantic_ said:
There’s a lot of pic/gif posting in here, with some commentary on what we like or dislike, but very little discussion. Let’s try and change that, if only for a bit. I know MD would approve if she was still around.

Control.
A straightforward concept, something integral to BDSM, something we all ( obviously ) appreciate and opine on superficially. But, in that disparity of likes and dislikes, there is meaning. A reason one thing speaks to us, and another does not. Why you shudder thinking about rough fingers closing around your throat, or the implications behind each of those knots as they’re tied. Why you start drooling before the gag even touches your lips, why your heart rate picks up at the thought of cuffs being fastened, pulled tight, being locked into a chosen pose ( under or above ) until the end. Why you feel warm and squirm in your seat at the thought of that split second before an open hand/crop/paddle/cane/whip comes down and connects just as hard as you need it to, where you wanted it to. And why going about what you want and how you want it ( regardless of where you identify on the spectrum ), goes much deeper than just rough sex.

What is control to you? Why do you need it? How important is it for you? When and how did you figure it out?

Tell me. Tell each other. Tell the world.
After all, that’s why you’re here.
Click to expand...

I don't think I 'need' it. There's so many different aspects to why I like it though ... the physical sensation of pain is just ... well, I don't know - awesome, I guess. I like seeing how far we can push me, and the feeling when I reach the limit. At it's best, it's definitely a drug. That's physical, but then it's also mental/emotional as well. So that leads onto another aspect, which is about trust - I love the feeling of trusting someone that much. Of knowing that I can trust someone that much. Knowing my life, it's not rocket surgery to work out why that's a good feeling for me.
 
Kat1980 said:
For me it's those moments in a loving, trusting relationships when you feel the dynamic suddenly shift, like a change in gear, like the ground momentarily falls away. Where you know he's taking control, because he simply has to have me, just the way he wants me. And giving him that control feels like a gift, and a release.
Click to expand...

Well said. And as a guy who takes control ... it actually hardens my dick more when I sense her submitting.
 
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