Describing Sex in Stories

[CoyoteTales]

It's an art, or it's not.

My writing mentor once told me this:

"There's a difference between writing erotica and stroke stories. The former is something that captures the imagination. The latter is just an assist towards masturbation."

Erotica is about the story around the sex scenes -- you have to make them want your characters to jump into bed (or the couch, or the back of their SUV). You have to get inside their heads. Get involved.

Some of the best writing I've done (not on this site) is, in a lot of ways, cheating. I think about some of the best sex I've had in my life, and some of the worst sex I've had in my life; that whole adage, 'write what you know' holds true. If you were to describe either of those things, what sorts of words would you use? Would it be loving or forceful? Is the POV of the main character nervous or confident? Lick, or bite? Suck or blow? Caress or scratch? Every event, every action, must follow the arc of what has come before.

Close your eyes and envision the scene about to unfold on your page. Remember to use all of your senses -- sight, sound, smell, touch, taste, where appropriate.

Sex is an instinctual thing. It is not mechanical, even if the moving parts are. It is awareness that creeps up on you that you've gone from being behaved and in control to holding on to your self-control, but barely.

It is opposing forces and attractive forces. It is life and a little death. It is music without lyrics and euphemisms with a side of purple prose.

If you've been following along -- pause a moment. Notice a sort of indrawn breath feeling, there? That is anticipation.

Create anticipation and you create desire. Sexual tension. And then the words won't matter as much as the flow.

That's how I see it, anyway.

Hope this helps...

-CT

 

[cocput]

I understood most parts of the post above (#28) except the following:

If you were to describe either of those things, what sorts of words would you use? Would it be loving or forceful? Is the POV of the main character nervous or confident? Lick, or bite? Suck or blow? Caress or scratch? Every event, every action, must follow the arc of what has come before.

The ones that baffled me most is in DarkRed above. Is there more to the words above than their dictionary meaning?

Are you talking about making every sexual act, an effect of something that happened before the sex scene?

How do you add a pause in the scene? I tried to make the characters think/say something to manufacture the pause. But it looks a bit odd, when I use it every time. I mean, there has to be a better way of doing it.

--scorpio

 

[CoyoteTales]

Ah, I was working with a stream of consciousness, late at night.

More simple than that -- if you think of sex as something that gathers momentum from an inertia point, each action that your characters take can either raise the stakes, be neutral, or be a turnoff to the other.

Lick vs. Bite: A lick is slow. Could be playful. Could be sloppy. Could be sensual. A bite is a little more directly forceful. Might be kinky depending on how hard you bite, and if you draw blood, definitely so, or in the realm of vampire stories.

Suck versus Blow: A little more of a double entendre. Oral stuff. Suck could be something along the lines of 'slow' if it's somewhere more or less innocent; fingertips, earlobes, wrists. Or fast if it's something like a nipple or genitalia. And blow could be 'slow' if it's just air blown lightly into an ear or across skin, or fast if it's below the beltline.

Caress versus scratch: Caress is definitely gentle and slow. Scratching is right in the realm of kink or self-defense, no doubt about it.

Essentially, once you start the coaster ride you can't slow down; it's a matter of recognizing when you want to transition from slow to fast.

And I originally meant pause as you were reading the post I wrote last night.

But since you asked:

Literally, have the characters pause to breathe, like right after one of those really deep kisses where someone needs to come up for air, panting. Pause as a character realizes what they're about to do with the other person. Pause as a delicious bit of hesitation, as clothes are madly shorn off of each other. Pause as the one person gets to admire the naked body they're about to have. Pause as someone dives under the side of the bed to pull out protection -- or toys. Pause as someone realizes that they're handcuffed to the bed.

A pause is powerful because it lets the reader catch up. It's a tempo switch in the flow, something that the reader gets to use to appreciate the avalanche of words that got them to that point. Rollercoasters do it at the top of a hill: sex does it right before someone takes the plunge.

(And yes. I do write very tongue in cheek; I love characters with a sense of humor.)

Hope this clears things up...
-CT

 

[HeyAll]

Great thread.


http://www.literotica.com/s/holiday-blackmail-ch-01

^^

I was reading one of my favorite stories last night, and it made me think about (as already mentioned in this thread) that the sexy stuff has to reflect the theme of the story.

If it's a blackmail story, the sex can't be fun and sexy. It should constantly remind you that it's degrading, nasty, and how much she hates it...but at the same time, a part of her secretly enjoys it.

If it's an incest story, in my opinion, it has to keep reminding you that it's taboo and that one or both characters are reluctant at first. And even when it gets to the point where it's playful, it's nice to have fun reminders that what they're doing is naughty, such as "God, I'm can't believe I'm doing this with my ____. I never thought this would ever happen."

 

[cocput]

Thanks CT.

It seems that I have to learn about tempo as well. As each day passes by, I am reminded of how much more I have to learn. Writing is not that much different from life!!


I don't know whether the author has to reinforce the notion of taboo that much in incest. I want to see if someone can bring out the conflict without saying it explicitly. If someone has already done it, then please share the story link. If not, can some experienced person make an attempt?
I would have done it myself, if I was confident enough with my word play..


--scorpio

 

[snoopercharmbrights]

... Caress versus scratch: Caress is definitely gentle and slow. Scratching is right in the realm of kink or self-defense, no doubt about it. ...

Sometimes caress becomes scratch as the person doing it becomes more excited, as in nearing a climax. For an author this is a good way of indicating the increase in emotional entaglement without needing to say, "(S)he felt a climax approaching."

Yes it's the old "show, don't tell" again.

 

[cocput]

Sometimes caress becomes scratch as the person doing it becomes more excited, as in nearing a climax.

Thanks for the pointer. I had used the change in the intensity of sound to indicate approaching climax. I should try to use all senses and sensations.