Desultory and Impulsive

[y=mx+b]

I love ejaculations like this.

https://cdn011.bdsmlr.com/uploads/photos/2020/03/9653983/bdsmlr-9653983-Nw1jVxHHAG.gif
The relaxed unrushed feel of them.

There's a therapeutic nature to them I cannot quite explain.

I love it
I love watching it

I love knowing exactly how it feels.

 

[Arianthe]

The relaxed unrushed feel of them.

There's a therapeutic nature to them I cannot quite explain.

I love it
I love watching it

I love knowing exactly how it feels.

She shouldn't waste it like that.

 

[y=mx+b]

She shouldn't waste it like that.

Yes and no.

Not every ejaculation needs a home. Sometimes it just needs to come out and be left to die on the floor or wiped off and thrown in the hamper.

This might be heresy for those that are ardent swallowers. To which I tip my hat to. Your services are very much appreciated. That said; they are not required, or necessarily always desired.

 

[y=mx+b]

In celebration of warmer weather...

 

[y=mx+b]

Easy for you to say... you can always make more.
We have to wait for it.
I’m not patient.

Have you ever been smacked upside the head for fucking up a good orgasm with your impatience?

Nice shorts.
Do you usually go commando?

No. Only when I like the feel of the fabric.

 

[Beth87]

Yes and no.

Not every ejaculation needs a home. Sometimes it just needs to come out and be left to die on the floor or wiped off and thrown in the hamper.

This might be heresy for those that are ardent swallowers. To which I tip my hat to. Your services are very much appreciated. That said; they are not required, or necessarily always desired.

This is refreshing to hear. The pressure to always want to swallow ruined my enjoyment of watching cum videos a long time ago. When guys tell me about their big loads..im often just thinking ...nope im not swallowing that much. Makes me feel queasy.

Which is silly, it should be fine to not swallow or even spit and swallow if you don't want it all. I'd quite like to be able to watch clips like that and just think about how good it makes him feel...or basically anything other than my ability to swallow the load on view.

Anyway...ill go back to lurking now

 

[Arianthe]

Yes and no.

Not every ejaculation needs a home. Sometimes it just needs to come out and be left to die on the floor or wiped off and thrown in the hamper.

This might be heresy for those that are ardent swallowers. To which I tip my hat to. Your services are very much appreciated. That said; they are not required, or necessarily always desired.

Swallowing isn't obligatory. I'd almost prefer to wear it. I'd probably get my nose out of joint if I jerked my Dom off, but wasn't allowed to play in it. Damn, I'm fucked up...

 

[Arianthe]

Also: nice shorts!

 

[AngelicaS1780]

In celebration of warmer weather...

That is certainly something worth celebrating.

 

[y=mx+b]

This is refreshing to hear. The pressure to always want to swallow ruined my enjoyment of watching cum videos a long time ago. When guys tell me about their big loads..im often just thinking ...nope im not swallowing that much. Makes me feel queasy.

Reading this makes me feel both angry and guilty. Angry that such a pressure exists and is imposed upon women. And guilty because well I'm a guy and guys like the thought and feel of women swallowing and the machinery behind the porn industry has done a great job conveying the belief that every woman has a rapt fascination and dire want to swallow that's incapable to resist---all the time.

It's complete total bullshit of course. With little doubt there's quite a number of women out there like you. The fascination is there but the love of it all has been ruined by false expectation and entitlement

Which is silly, it should be fine to not swallow or even spit and swallow if you don't want it all. I'd quite like to be able to watch clips like that and just think about how good it makes him feel...or basically anything other than my ability to swallow the load on view.

Anyway...ill go back to lurking now

It should be just as fine not to swallow as it is to swallow.

I will take it a step further and say a woman's sexual capital should not be based on whether she does or not.

The thought that women are made to feel (either outright or implied) that they are sexually unfulfilling because they don't swallow (or take it up the ass) depresses me.


So I found us some clips Beth. Although I understand how and why the joy was taken away from you, the male orgasm and ejaculation is a mysterious beautiful thing to have and observe in all it's forms.



One

Two

Three

Four

 

[y=mx+b]

Swallowing isn't obligatory. I'd almost prefer to wear it. I'd probably get my nose out of joint if I jerked my Dom off, but wasn't allowed to play in it. Damn, I'm fucked up...

Sounds like you are pretty well adjusted to me.

I mean it's only fair that you get to play with the result of your effort.

 

[y=mx+b]

Sometimes...

Sometimes I'll take a dick pic

I'm not entirely sure why I do. I've no desire to show or share such pics

But I'll take a pic. Go "yep. that's a dick pic" then delete it.

Every once in awhile (and this is going to sound arrogantly narcissistic) I'll take a dick pic, get all fine photgraphy Robert Mapplethorpe with it and go "fuck... that's a great dick pic!"

And I'll wish that it wasn't my dick... or me in the picture so I could share it and be all like... "check out this excellent dick pick I took!" With zero subtext of "Hey you. Here's my dick."

At times I will think... "if only I were gay."

Gay men have this luxury of being able to show their wares in such a way that is both erotic and non-threatening to women. They also have little concern for being seen as narcissists by women because that's not the target audience per say. Women can observe them comfortably in their love for dick free of any worry or presumption on the part of the man they harbor thoughts of sucking and fucking with reckless abandon.

 

[y=mx+b]

Well, what fun is that?

I know. I really don't know why I bother.

Just another empty pursuit of mine.


Time that could have gone towards cleaning the house or playing videogames.

 

[y=mx+b]

The most recent picture in question
Was taken Saturday.

I had just gotten back to the shop and had to piss

I went into the bathroom
Unbuttoned and unzipped the fly of my work pants.

Rather than pull the elastic band down over my dick, I fished my penis and full scrotum out the slit opening of my boxer briefs.

All exposed in front of the toilet
I held onto both sides of my open pants and directed the slack relaxed body of my anatomy towards the water of the toilet and began to piss.

Looking down
The way I was holding on to my pants
The way my button down shirt was pulled up
The way my slack lazy penis somewhat swollen by the heat of the day just hung there... it all just felt so... masculine.

So I shimmied myself over to the bathroom sink and mirror for a different perspective.

And there I was
Hanging
Relaxed and to a slight left

My hands clenching my pants
The veins of my forearms
Visible to the eye

Everything... framed so perfectly.

I set up my phone... just to see what I could get.

Repositioned myself

Took the pic to the sound of work and talk being done behind the closed door of the bathroom.

It was a quickie. I didn't expect much.
I actually forgot about it.

I rediscovered it yesterday and was like... "why the fuck did I take that..." was about to delete it but convinced myself I would after I played around with the values.

I cropped it in such a way that showed my exposed body, my hands, and forearms.

I then converted it to black and white.
Increased the brightness just a bit
Then increased the contrast.

The resulting effect was the drowning out of my boxer briefs to black thus isolating my genitals to being unavoidably on display in a perfect natural state. The detail of my forearms, the veins and arm hair was drawn out...

It was all so... gritty yet average and normal. A matter-of-fact end-of-my-workday this-is-me kind of image.

 

[y=mx+b]

I have this superstitious belief
That things are shitty for me
Because my thoughts are split
Because my heart isn't pure.

Such superstitious bullshit
Is the seed that religion sprouts from

And it is not exclusive to me.

No matter
It is still very personal

Particularly during the long
Dark
Quiet commutes home
From work

Where I am the only car on the highway
Drifting across the center lane
Tired
And careless

If only I stuck to a routine...
If only I eliminated extracurricular thoughts and actions and people...

If only I (X) than (Y) would happen.

But then so many do so much worse... or so much less... and they are still rewarded with what happiness my life is and will always be deficient of.

 

[y=mx+b]

I wonder where this magical thinking comes from.

Want for meaning and purpose I suppose.

But that strikes me generic.

I'm reminded of my youth. Of reading choose your own adventure books.

I always chose the shortest path that ended the story quicker. Sometimes the path ended in my death. Punishment for having made the wrong choice.

I didn't care.

I am also reminded of hinting (and in a way begging) my mother to buy Close-Up toothpaste or Big Red chewing gum because the commercials featured women kissing guys.

I didn't even know what kissing was. But I knew I wanted it badly and if I had these tools and combed my hair a certain way it would happen.

It's easy to say "that's the magic of marketing"

But it really isn't. Marketing is what salt is to food. Brings out the flavor of what's already there.

 

[Arianthe]

The most recent picture in question
Was taken Saturday.

I had just gotten back to the shop and had to piss

I went into the bathroom
Unbuttoned and unzipped the fly of my work pants.

Rather than pull the elastic band down over my dick, I fished my penis and full scrotum out the slit opening of my boxer briefs.

All exposed in front of the toilet
I held onto both sides of my open pants and directed the slack relaxed body of my anatomy towards the water of the toilet and began to piss.

Looking down
The way I was holding on to my pants
The way my button down shirt was pulled up
The way my slack lazy penis somewhat swollen by the heat of the day just hung there... it all just felt so... masculine.

So I shimmied myself over to the bathroom sink and mirror for a different perspective.

And there I was
Hanging
Relaxed and to a slight left

My hands clenching my pants
The veins of my forearms
Visible to the eye

Everything... framed so perfectly.

I set up my phone... just to see what I could get.

Repositioned myself

Took the pic to the sound of work and talk being done behind the closed door of the bathroom.

It was a quickie. I didn't expect much.
I actually forgot about it.

I rediscovered it yesterday and was like... "why the fuck did I take that..." was about to delete it but convinced myself I would after I played around with the values.

I cropped it in such a way that showed my exposed body, my hands, and forearms.

I then converted it to black and white.
Increased the brightness just a bit
Then increased the contrast.

The resulting effect was the drowning out of my boxer briefs to black thus isolating my genitals to being unavoidably on display in a perfect natural state. The detail of my forearms, the veins and arm hair was drawn out...

It was all so... gritty yet average and normal. A matter-of-fact end-of-my-workday this-is-me kind of image.

But did you delete it? Because I would love to see. "Gritty... matter-of-fact... this-is-me..." is what you do best.

 

[y=mx+b]

But did you delete it? Because I would love to see. "Gritty... matter-of-fact... this-is-me..." is what you do best.

No.
It's been filed away along with my all time favorite pic that I really fucking wish wasn't me.

 

[y=mx+b]

Having masturbated before my shower
I am laying in bed right now.

I came on the bathroom floor
And wiped it up
With the underwear
I had shed not too long before the act

I was watching a video
Of a popular contemporary porn actress
That I've come to be rather fond of

Both as an actress
And as a human

I'm not much for studio porn
I kinda like to watch people
Who look to be within my reach
Where there's an element of awkwardness to the act of sex

But every once in awhile I need pure escapism only the professionals can give.

 

[y=mx+b]

The downside is facing the reality
That I can't fuck like that.

Of course... it's refreshing sometimes to see a professional woman being manhandle in ways that men have been lead to believe is hot and erotic, by a man with the kind of dick we are given cause to believe women; either prefer or secretly lust for, have to spit in her hand in order to lube herself up.

 

[Arianthe]

The downside is facing the reality
That I can't fuck like that.

Of course... it's refreshing sometimes to see a professional woman being manhandle in ways that men have been lead to believe is hot and erotic, by a man with the kind of dick we are given cause to believe women; either prefer or secretly lust for, have to spit in her hand in order to lube herself up.

It's all a fantasy. I've read about porn shoots and it sounds like there's nothing natural, organic or intuitive about the process. It takes mad skills to do some of that stuff AND look sexy doing it.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

I wonder where this magical thinking comes from.
Want for meaning and purpose I suppose.
But that strikes me generic.

I'm reminded of my youth. Of reading choose your own adventure books.
I always chose the shortest path that ended the story quicker. Sometimes the path ended in my death. Punishment for having made the wrong choice.
I didn't care.

I am also reminded of hinting (and in a way begging) my mother to buy Close-Up toothpaste or Big Red chewing gum because the commercials featured women kissing guys.
I didn't even know what kissing was. But I knew I wanted it badly and if I had these tools and combed my hair a certain way it would happen.
It's easy to say "that's the magic of marketing"
But it really isn't. Marketing is what salt is to food. Brings out the flavor of what's already there.

More basic than meaning and purpose, I believe that it is also the desire for understanding and control...being able to make sense of chaos and to comprehend "how things work". If you follow the rules, if you purchase that perfect tool, if you do things a certain way, then the elusive happiness should be guaranteed.

 

[AudreyMarie]

The most recent picture in question
Was taken Saturday.

I had just gotten back to the shop and had to piss

I went into the bathroom
Unbuttoned and unzipped the fly of my work pants.

Rather than pull the elastic band down over my dick, I fished my penis and full scrotum out the slit opening of my boxer briefs.

All exposed in front of the toilet
I held onto both sides of my open pants and directed the slack relaxed body of my anatomy towards the water of the toilet and began to piss.

Looking down
The way I was holding on to my pants
The way my button down shirt was pulled up
The way my slack lazy penis somewhat swollen by the heat of the day just hung there... it all just felt so... masculine.

So I shimmied myself over to the bathroom sink and mirror for a different perspective.

And there I was
Hanging
Relaxed and to a slight left

My hands clenching my pants
The veins of my forearms
Visible to the eye

Everything... framed so perfectly.

I set up my phone... just to see what I could get.

Repositioned myself

Took the pic to the sound of work and talk being done behind the closed door of the bathroom.

It was a quickie. I didn't expect much.
I actually forgot about it.

I rediscovered it yesterday and was like... "why the fuck did I take that..." was about to delete it but convinced myself I would after I played around with the values.

I cropped it in such a way that showed my exposed body, my hands, and forearms.

I then converted it to black and white.
Increased the brightness just a bit
Then increased the contrast.

The resulting effect was the drowning out of my boxer briefs to black thus isolating my genitals to being unavoidably on display in a perfect natural state. The detail of my forearms, the veins and arm hair was drawn out...

It was all so... gritty yet average and normal. A matter-of-fact end-of-my-workday this-is-me kind of image.

Sounds awfully narcissistic to me?

 

[AudreyMarie]

It's all a fantasy. I've read about porn shoots and it sounds like there's nothing natural, organic or intuitive about the process. It takes mad skills to do some of that stuff AND look sexy doing it.

The more I've learned about the industry, the less I like it.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

Sounds awfully narcissistic to me?

Self-focused is more how I would describe it, in the context of showing a bit of the process of a visual artist. Observing something, framing it in your mind, then wondering if you can actually capture what you are seeing. Doubting the quality or point of the resulting photo, but giving in to the impulse to manipulate it. Creating something different than the original image that actually expresses more.

A narcissist would be unlikely to express feelings of doubt about having taken the photo and would not use the terms "average" and "normal" to describe himself. I know that, in an earlier post, he says, "Every once in awhile (and this is going to sound arrogantly narcissistic) I'll take a dick pic, get all fine photgraphy Robert Mapplethorpe with it and go "fuck... that's a great dick pic!""

Sorry, y, but I don't think that qualifies. If you looked at the photo and said, "Fuck...I have a perfect dick and my photography rivals Mapplethorpe's.", really believed that, and proceeded to share said photo and opinion with others, then you would be a narcissist.

P.S. I think saying arrogantly narcissistic might be redundant.