Desultory and Impulsive
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AmazingLost
Really Experienced
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I want to post something witty -- perhaps slightly sexy. But it can't be stupid.
y=mx+b
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Be my guest.
AmazingLost
Really Experienced
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y=mx+b
___________
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JustAnotherFlower
In The Garden
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When you're used to chaos, peace is an unsettling thing.
y=mx+b
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So I wake up this morning having learned that the daughter of a good highschool friend of mine has turned 18 not too long ago.
He grew up in a dysfunctional situation. Met a woman in an equally dysfunctional situation. She became pregnant and subsequently became even further dysfunctional. He got full custody while she pursued the ever-so-struggling path to recovery.
On social media he kept his daughter mostly shielded as a good father should do.
He was and is a 100% punk rock grunge baby. As left as left can be and I absolutely love him. He fights the good fight for the disenfranchised. Always has.
Classic case of being insainly smart as fuck but lost out in the birth lottery and born in the wrong tax bracket.
Anyway yeah... he's a good dad. All through out he'd share the random pic of he and his daughter as they grew together and apart and back together. Cheap vacation outings he could afford. Christmases, birthdays etc... but they were always through the lens of his fatherly eye. "Look she's hardcore punk like me!!! I didn't teach her this!"
And she is
And he didn't
...circumstance did.
I digress
So I wake up this morning and am scrolling through my friend suggestions on the facebook as I seem to do every time this year and his daughter comes up as a suggestion.
Curious I click.
SHE'S FABULOUS! being all 18/19 traveling to Vegas being all crazy kicking ass taking names like her dad! Her dad being the good dad he is liking all her pics and adventures when she says "Dad I'm taking off for the weekend!"
And so then on her page is a link to her instagram account... Which her dad liked.
So... I clicked.
sweet mother of god hit me with a stupid stick because the woman is smoking hot
And she's a eclectic kind of hot. Like young Brook Shields, Lady Gaga, and Ian MacKaye from Minor Threat mashed all their naked body parts together in a night of violent sexual bliss thus resulting in a child--kind of hot
And I'm like GODDAMNIT!
And the whole thing feels so... organic to me. Don't feel awkward at all. Like if my friend where to have seen my reaction he'd have been like... "I KNOW! I DON'T KNOW HOW I DID THAT!"
And not in a creepy kind of way. She's doing her thing and he's proud of her
I'm sure there's some fatherly concerns for her safety, security, and preservation of her heart... but, yeah he didn't raise a fool.
Thing is... I've been reading the comments on her IG. All are like "OMG U R so HAWT! DM me for collaboration!"
And I'm like... "fuck off with your scams"
He grew up in a dysfunctional situation. Met a woman in an equally dysfunctional situation. She became pregnant and subsequently became even further dysfunctional. He got full custody while she pursued the ever-so-struggling path to recovery.
On social media he kept his daughter mostly shielded as a good father should do.
He was and is a 100% punk rock grunge baby. As left as left can be and I absolutely love him. He fights the good fight for the disenfranchised. Always has.
Classic case of being insainly smart as fuck but lost out in the birth lottery and born in the wrong tax bracket.
Anyway yeah... he's a good dad. All through out he'd share the random pic of he and his daughter as they grew together and apart and back together. Cheap vacation outings he could afford. Christmases, birthdays etc... but they were always through the lens of his fatherly eye. "Look she's hardcore punk like me!!! I didn't teach her this!"
And she is
And he didn't
...circumstance did.
I digress
So I wake up this morning and am scrolling through my friend suggestions on the facebook as I seem to do every time this year and his daughter comes up as a suggestion.
Curious I click.
SHE'S FABULOUS! being all 18/19 traveling to Vegas being all crazy kicking ass taking names like her dad! Her dad being the good dad he is liking all her pics and adventures when she says "Dad I'm taking off for the weekend!"
And so then on her page is a link to her instagram account... Which her dad liked.
So... I clicked.
sweet mother of god hit me with a stupid stick because the woman is smoking hot
And she's a eclectic kind of hot. Like young Brook Shields, Lady Gaga, and Ian MacKaye from Minor Threat mashed all their naked body parts together in a night of violent sexual bliss thus resulting in a child--kind of hot
And I'm like GODDAMNIT!
And the whole thing feels so... organic to me. Don't feel awkward at all. Like if my friend where to have seen my reaction he'd have been like... "I KNOW! I DON'T KNOW HOW I DID THAT!"
And not in a creepy kind of way. She's doing her thing and he's proud of her
I'm sure there's some fatherly concerns for her safety, security, and preservation of her heart... but, yeah he didn't raise a fool.
Thing is... I've been reading the comments on her IG. All are like "OMG U R so HAWT! DM me for collaboration!"
And I'm like... "fuck off with your scams"
y=mx+b
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This is true.
Moochienanu
Gives hot transcript
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y=mx+b
___________
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Right?
It's been 15 years and I finally almost feel as though I've reached the poise, grace and maturity level she intimidated me with back in 8th grade.
Moochienanu
Gives hot transcript
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Have you started a conversation yet? What’s your opener? Is she still as hot and intimidating? Inquiring minds need to know more!
y=mx+b
___________
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It's complicated.
In full disclosure I said she was intimidating in order to pull at the heartstrings of those nostalgic types looking to identify.
It was rather cheap and dishonest of me and to those individuals I wish to apologize.
My story isn't one of some snooty hot popular chick and some dorky awkward nerd type guy.
It's a rather boring one about small town social class dynamics. Where two kids really had nothing in common so there wasn't a need to really interact.
On the face of it
It sounds like an us against them story. It really isn't. It more of a you are over there and I am over here type story
She's smart
Pretty
Athletic
And the daughter of prominent people of the community.
She was also very nice. And very human.
Below all that she was there was a currency to her that said "I didn't ask for any of this!"
But perhaps I'm projecting that upon her.
I think she was under a lot of pressure which she assumed was normal for everyone else.
I saw her profile way back in the beginning of collecting all my "friends" I very well could have sent her a request then. Perhaps I should have. But I didn't. She of course could have done the same for me. But she didn't.
Not out of mutual spite or lack of curiosity or interest. Just more out of... I don't know. We just didn't
But then I did today. And she actually accepted like a half hour later.
All this to say; no I've not started a conversation. We've no real shared memories.
And I think that's why I never sent her a friend request. No shared memories together. She was always over there and I over here
JustAnotherFlower
In The Garden
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Or a severe case of survivor's guilt.
y=mx+b
___________
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Right?
It's a thought that's pretty much carried me through my whole work day today.
Imagine she was absolutely oblivious. Only learning the fact after his arrest. All of the sudden this otherwise perfect man and father is taken away from her. All because of her sisters.
The sister taking what they've experienced to the grave with them.
Leaving the one left out... to wonder what happened. How bad was it? What was it like? How could he? Did he really?
Why not her? Was she not pretty? Why didn't he have such feelings for her as he did for them?
y=mx+b
___________
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And so it's a story in my head.
A sexual type one
One that starts out like... by the time she was responsibly old enough to suck dick, she found herself in her room with her boyfriend. Things became heated as things do and she found herself eagerly on her knees unzipping his fly
Naked he stood before her. And it wasn't until then when she thought... "was this what it was like for them?"
A sexual type one
One that starts out like... by the time she was responsibly old enough to suck dick, she found herself in her room with her boyfriend. Things became heated as things do and she found herself eagerly on her knees unzipping his fly
Naked he stood before her. And it wasn't until then when she thought... "was this what it was like for them?"
y=mx+b
___________
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But it's not
Because like her
He is young.
His cock is young.
It is nothing like anything they had experienced.
And she's envious
And she hates that she is.
She knows that she shouldn't be
She should be horrified
But she isn't
She's angry
Angry at them
She hates them
Because of them
She grew up fatherless.
Because like her
He is young.
His cock is young.
It is nothing like anything they had experienced.
And she's envious
And she hates that she is.
She knows that she shouldn't be
She should be horrified
But she isn't
She's angry
Angry at them
She hates them
Because of them
She grew up fatherless.
