Desultory and Impulsive

[y=mx+b]

Meh...

 

[y=mx+b]

My thoughts run along the lines of how each and every one of us think that we are more than what we are.

All of us the stars of our own movie
And rightfully so as we each are living it individually.

But out side of that
Outside of ourselves
We are mostly in the way.

 

[JustAnotherFlower]

My thoughts run along the lines of how each and every one of us think that we are more than what we are.

All of us the stars of our own movie
And rightfully so as we each are living it individually.

But out side of that
Outside of ourselves
We are mostly in the way.

Depends upon the individual's self worth and esteem. Some view themselves so much less than they are....

 

[y=mx+b]

She thought back to when she was younger

Back when she was still just getting used to her body.

Her family would meet every year at the lake for a family reunion of sorts

Far off the dock there was a swim platform floating on pontoons

The water there was deeper so she would make it her escape from all the younger ones while the adults drank beer, played horseshoes and do what all else parents and aunts and uncles did.

 

[y=mx+b]

Depends upon the individual's self worth and esteem. Some view themselves so much less than they are....

Self worth is a human construct meant to fool others into believing there is a greater purpose.

 

[y=mx+b]

She had a thing that she did
Where she would dive into the water
Swim around the back where the ladder was but instead of climbing back up and out she would inhale then exhale three times each with increasing amounts of air until her lungs could not take in anymore air and she would descend down the latter until she reached the bottom rung where she would hold onto and push against.

And she would hold herself there. Pushing herself as deep and as far away from the surface as she could.

 

[y=mx+b]

Grammatically that was a bit more of a rough read than usual.

Long day. Bit tired. Working on a shit ton of scattered thoughts.

 

[y=mx+b]

She liked the darkness
She liked it best on the days when it was windy and the water was choppy and no one wanted to swim.

She liked how up top it was all so busy and loud. But far below it was calm and still.


One day
It was still

Dead calm

The sun had this feeling upon her skin

Warm
Like a blanket

Like a dog laying next to you
In such a way that made you want to be spooned.

But it can't
Because it's a dog.


But the warmth was more than just on the outside

It was inside her as well
And it filled her with a dizzy kind of sense

A humming kind of sense

It made her angry
And the world seemed stupid

She looked towards the shore
Then scootched over to the other side of the platform facing away and sat on the edge


And felt pretty.

 

[y=mx+b]

Quietly
She slipped into the water
Swam towards the ladder
Paused
And began breathing

She got to the third breath of which was her diving breath

But she didn't descend

She let the breath go
And lowered herself just slightly down
To the point where the surface of the water was just above her lip but yet still below her nose.

And she felt that little line rise and fall between her lip and nose as she felt the fabric of her bikini bottoms slide along the side of her thighs and naked water take it's place unencumbered against her flesh

 

[y=mx+b]

Nevermind.

 

[y=mx+b]

I always struggle with that.

With writing something that's just a bit too personal, too intimate, too much.

Even if it's just too much of all of that to me.

But then I post it
Read it posted
And go "mmmm.... nah."

And quick edit to Nevermind


There's no way to hide the lameness of the act.

But then
At the same time
I'm kinda happy for the jonny-on-the-spots that catch the nonsense before I edit.

I like to think it's like finding $5 in their coat pocket that they forgot about.


I always like it when I catch a post like that. Be it a pic or expression of thoughts and feelings.

Oft times I'm compelled to post a comment. But commenting on another's thread causes me to feel awkward. Stupid. And sometimes (a lot of the time) like a cock block. There's always this sense of male competition with a woman's pic thread. Each guy commenting hoping she will reply. All queuing up and vying for her attention. Her being all diplomatic and responding to each one with some sort of acknowledgement so as to not hurt any feelers. Knowing herself that being ignored or overlooked or dismissed hurts the feelers. And sometimes hurts the feelers quite a bit.

So yeah. Its awkward for me. I am not a fan of competition. And I'm not a fan of having hurt feelers. And I'm not a fan of trite recognition. So I make it easy for all parties and stick to myself. Here.

That's a digression away from me saying I like finding myself catching that something intimate only to see it go *poof* oft times it's brilliant. Or beautiful.

But then I kinda end up feeling sad because it's something they want to share. Something they want to be seen. But cannot bring themselves to allow themselves to be so... open... so raw.

But I get it. Lord goddamnit do I get it.

 

[tallguy78]

I always struggle with that.

With writing something that's just a bit too personal, too intimate, too much.

Even if it's just too much of all of that to me.

But then I post it
Read it posted
And go "mmmm.... nah."

And quick edit to Nevermind


There's no way to hide the lameness of the act.

But then
At the same time
I'm kinda happy for the jonny-on-the-spots that catch the nonsense before I edit.

I like to think it's like finding $5 in their coat pocket that they forgot about.


I always like it when I catch a post like that. Be it a pic or expression of thoughts and feelings.

Oft times I'm compelled to post a comment. But commenting on another's thread causes me to feel awkward. Stupid. And sometimes (a lot of the time) like a cock block. There's always this sense of male competition with a woman's pic thread. Each guy commenting hoping she will reply. All queuing up and vying for her attention. Her being all diplomatic and responding to each one with some sort of acknowledgement so as to not hurt any feelers. Knowing herself that being ignored or overlooked or dismissed hurts the feelers. And sometimes hurts the feelers quite a bit.

So yeah. Its awkward for me. I am not a fan of competition. And I'm not a fan of having hurt feelers. And I'm not a fan of trite recognition. So I make it easy for all parties and stick to myself. Here.

That's a digression away from me saying I like finding myself catching that something intimate only to see it go *poof* oft times it's brilliant. Or beautiful.

But then I kinda end up feeling sad because it's something they want to share. Something they want to be seen. But cannot bring themselves to allow themselves to be so... open... so raw.

But I get it. Lord goddamnit do I get it.

I haven't been following your thread for long, but I really enjoy it. Overall I agree, there's an at-times desperate competition in some threads and I find myself getting drawn into it, trying to be clever but honest and accepting of all... But still wanting. I can understand the appeal of finding your own space to express, but I'm still not willing to start a thread of my own. I like yours though.

 

[y=mx+b]

I haven't been following your thread for long, but I really enjoy it. Overall I agree, there's an at-times desperate competition in some threads and I find myself getting drawn into it, trying to be clever but honest and accepting of all... But still wanting. I can understand the appeal of finding your own space to express, but I'm still not willing to start a thread of my own. I like yours though.

I was thinking something along these lines the other day.

How; as far as dedicated guy threads out there, there's only really just a handful of us.

There's a number of Guys Post Your... type threads that are great and quite popular with the ladies it seems. Sometimes even I am tempted to throw down a pic just because the exposure seems so great and admittedly I sometimes really just want to be validated. But then I'm like... I got my own goddamn thread. They can come find it here.

Although it feels like they never do. But that's on me.

But yeah. I was thinking about it. About how there's so few of us.

I find it funny given the number of random guys are out there cold calling women with random PMs hoping to hook-up, connect, send cock pics to, talk smut to etc... yet don't have the balls and or otherwise unable to maintain a goddamn pic thread.

The bitch of it is... it seems to work.

Talk to pretty much any woman that's hooked up with a guy or established an online relationship with its usually with some random with few posts and no thread of his own.

So I can testify if you are looking for pussy a thread of your own sure the fuck isn't the way to go.

Sure you might be admired but that's about it. And even then you won't really hear about it.



It's damn goddamn tough maintaining a thread. The only real upside is the lack of inner thread competition. And it feels awesome as fuck when a women does happen to come by and post because she is making herself seen for you

But is there external thread competition?

For me? I can't say that there is. I actually love my fellow brothers from other mothers. Massive Grooves etc... ADIDAS00, Willingtoshare... do I follow them? No. Do I check out what they are up to? Sometimes. Do I click their pics? Yep. Am I envious? I can't say that I am. They know how to keep their audience active and engaged (I guess I'm a bit envious of that. But hey, that's not really a strength of mine) They got good things going on.

Personally though? God... to think back to starting my first thread? Fuck.

It helped having some encouragement. Some people already interested in me with a want to coax me along.

 

[y=mx+b]

Also....

Thank you tallguy for bringing it to my attention that you enjoy my thread. It means a lot to me and I appreciate knowing that you do.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

My favorite personal/individual AmPics threads are ones like yours, where the thread owner gives the reader/viewer a glimpse into their thoughts, either through their storywriting and/or poetry (you, Moochie) or through their commentary about their experiences and what they observe in the world around them (Allia, Justa). I definitely recognize and respect the amount of work that goes into maintaining such a thread. The personal/individual threads that are primarily photos take a lot of work as well, but I don't find them as interesting or compelling.

Just my thoughts...and some appreciation for what you share with us, both in your photos and your words.

 

[Moochienanu]

I always like it when I catch a post like that. Be it a pic or expression of thoughts and feelings.

Oft times I'm compelled to post a comment. But commenting on another's thread causes me to feel awkward. Stupid. And sometimes (a lot of the time) like a cock block. There's always this sense of male competition with a woman's pic thread. Each guy commenting hoping she will reply. All queuing up and vying for her attention. Her being all diplomatic and responding to each one with some sort of acknowledgement so as to not hurt any feelers. Knowing herself that being ignored or overlooked or dismissed hurts the feelers. And sometimes hurts the feelers quite a bit.

So yeah. Its awkward for me. I am not a fan of competition. And I'm not a fan of having hurt feelers. And I'm not a fan of trite recognition. So I make it easy for all parties and stick to myself. Here.

That's a digression away from me saying I like finding myself catching that something intimate only to see it go *poof* oft times it's brilliant. Or beautiful.

But then I kinda end up feeling sad because it's something they want to share. Something they want to be seen. But cannot bring themselves to allow themselves to be so... open... so raw.

But I get it. Lord goddamnit do I get it.

I am so very guilty of this: posting and realizing it is too much of myself exposed, so removing it (and usually replacing it with music). I understand this feeling of desire to be more free and then immediately regretting the choice to try to be.

You are also aware of my “I don’t reply to everyone who posts in my thread” policy (considering you’re someone who reminds me it’s okay to have such a policy). I do know that it makes people feel excluded, which leaves me wishing I was more like the girls who can flirt and carry an audience with a simple sentence and pic of my bum... but that just isn’t who I am. It’s about substance and reason and thoughts with people like us.

*snip* It's damn goddamn tough maintaining a thread. The only real upside is the lack of inner thread competition. And it feels awesome as fuck when a women does happen to come by and post because she is making herself seen for you *snip*

It is almost like a job to maintain a personal thread, I agree... but you’re right - when a woman does waltz in and post, it can feel fucking magical.

 

[y=mx+b]

And while down there
She could think her thoughts
And remember memories
She didn't like to allow herself
To think
And remember

Above the surface

When able to be seen
And breath.


Down there
Enveloped by the weight
And the darkness
Being squeezed
By the pressure of the water
She thought about the little red hen
Being mounted by the rooster

How it happened
Right there
Violent mounting

The little hen
Just there
Being nothing more
Than a little hen

The rooster
Long red comb and waddle
Did not ask
Just took

Jumping on the back of the little red hen
Seeing what was once seen as just ugly yellow chicken feet become talons. Spur clad weapons digging into her back. Pinning her wings down. Keeping her from flapping. Keeping her from shaking him off

His beak
Sharp and angry
Pulling her head back by the little feathers on her head

How her beak
Parted as if to squawk
As if to yell
As if to say.... no

Hearing no sound from her
No objection to being taken

The arch of his back
Mashing of his parts against hers
The weight of him pushing her down

Seeing her sink in
Give in
Give up
And just take him

Not being given a chance to get up
To recover
Before another rooster mounted her
Then another

Just as grossly violent as the last

Pushed to the ground
Into the dusty dirt of the earth
Head pulled back
Talons clutching her body

Feeling the wanting to stop it all for her
But wanting more of it to happen

And wanting it to happen to her

Some how

Wanting
To be treated
The exact
Same
Way

Hair grabbed
Head pull
Back arched
Being thrusted against
Being hated
And violated

And made to cry.

 

[y=mx+b]

My favorite personal/individual AmPics threads are ones like yours, where the thread owner gives the reader/viewer a glimpse into their thoughts, either through their storywriting and/or poetry (you, Moochie) or through their commentary about their experiences and what they observe in the world around them (Allia, Justa). I definitely recognize and respect the amount of work that goes into maintaining such a thread. The personal/individual threads that are primarily photos take a lot of work as well, but I don't find them as interesting or compelling.

Just my thoughts...and some appreciation for what you share with us, both in your photos and your words.

Thank you.

I do feel like I should have more pictures though. Ones other than just my hands. Hands are easy though and history has proven I get just as many comments on them as I have on anything else

 

[y=mx+b]

I am so very guilty of this: posting and realizing it is too much of myself exposed, so removing it (and usually replacing it with music). I understand this feeling of desire to be more free and then immediately regretting the choice to try to be.

You are also aware of my “I don’t reply to everyone who posts in my thread” policy (considering you’re someone who reminds me it’s okay to have such a policy). I do know that it makes people feel excluded, which leaves me wishing I was more like the girls who can flirt and carry an audience with a simple sentence and pic of my bum... but that just isn’t who I am. It’s about substance and reason and thoughts with people like us.

I do like those girls and often feel compelled to comment. But by the time I get around to seeing their latest bum pic a cadre of guys have already told her near exactly what I want to say.

Admittedly sometimes I want to say things like "sweet jesusfuck I want mash your cheeks together and railfuck the bed of your asshole with the underside of my cock and blow my load all over the small of your back"

But therein again... competition and cockblocking. A lot of these women have longtime ardent followers and who the fuck am I to drop something like the right in out of the blue?

It is almost like a job to maintain a personal thread, I agree... but you’re right - when a woman does waltz in and post, it can feel fucking magical.

You know why it feels that way? Because women are magical.

 

[y=mx+b]

I wish I could have been the perfect experience she sought from me.

 

[y=mx+b]

Maybe I should get back to doing sit-ups.

 

[y=mx+b]

Dog barks...

 

[y=mx+b]

Every morning...

 

[y=mx+b]

At the deer eating birdseed that has fallen upon the snow covered ground.

 

[y=mx+b]

I love touching her while she sleeps

In many ways
It's the only time
I am able to do so
How I want to

With her asleep
I am careful to grab her
And hold the fat of her flesh
And clutch every bit of it
Without her insecurity
Getting in the way
Of my lustful admiration

Over the years
I've learned
Just how to go about doing it

Her breasts are too sensitive
And are best to just be cupped
No squeezing pinching or stroking

Cupped
The full weight of them
In my hand
Spilling over
And between my fingers

Her stomach
I can glide over
And stroke
In a soft petting manner
Best with the back of my fingers
Her skin there is soft
Smooth
Like warm silk

I've laid many a night and morning
Spooning her
And lightly gliding
The backs of my fingers
From the soft part of her side
Between her hip and ribs
All the way across her stomach
I love how it lays there
Slack
Relaxed
Peaceful

Doing so solicits such a desire in me
That makes me want to take the whole of her up in my arms and runaway off into the trees as though she weren't mine already and keep her all to myself.

Her hips ass and thighs... goddamnit.

My love...

MY LOVE!


Stroking
Clutching
Grabbing
Squeezing
Parting her ass cheeks to press my own thigh in and up against it

The heat of her body
The memory of my face being in that just same spot

Her breathing deepening
Kneading
Pressing
Massaging
Running the length of my arm
Along the full length of her thigh

So much nakedness


And that's what I love
The fucking nakedness of it all
The comfort of it all
The freedom to luxuriate
Against the surface of her
Taking in
The sleep smell of her sweat
The texture of her pubic hair
The cleft of her crotch
The crack of her ass
How it all hides so much of what I want
And having it all there

All of it
All of her
Against me
And in my hands
Beautifully asleep