Does Erotic Poetry Mean Graphic?

[UnderYourSpell]

Heavy breathing,muffled sighs,
His head, buried between my wifes smooth thighs,
Her face so flushed,her nostrils flaring,
Me, full of love,full of caring,
Bed sheets scrunched,her fists,tightly gripping,
His expert tounge busy,probing,slipping

As her passion started to grow,
I sat back,watched the erotic show,
She on her back,legs parted wide,
My wife,my love,beautiful bride,
Him poised,erection big and throbbing,
Jutting out proud,erect and bobbing.

He slid inside with a smooth,steady thrust,
My wife now eager,consumed with lust,
They squirmed,jerked,writhing in mutual pleasure,
My wife the prize,the ultimate treasure,
Gliding inside so velvety,tight and slick,
She wriggled impaled upon his dick.

Then he filled her with floods of his seed,
Her legs round his waist,urging,hungry,full of need,
She milked him,drained him dry,
He gave a sobbing,drawn out cry,
My wife now inhibitions gone without a trace,
Somehow different,showing a new face.

Raised on her elbows,smiled at me and beckons,
Legs shamelessly akimbo for my sloppy seconds,
So for us this works,the excitement,passion sharing,
So close,so happy together caring,
We share our thoughts,every deep desire,
Keeps our passion alight,full of fire.

Twenty two years married and so happy together.( to the many people that will be full of scorn for us)

Why should they be full of scorn for you? Although when you put 'his' and 'he. it sounds like you are watching a third person do it to her and not yourself as in 'me' amd 'my'.

 

[bflagsst]

Heavy breathing,muffled sighs,
His head, buried between my wifes smooth thighs,
Her face so flushed,her nostrils flaring,
Me, full of love,full of caring,
Bed sheets scrunched,her fists,tightly gripping,
His expert tounge busy,probing,slipping

As her passion started to grow,
I sat back,watched the erotic show,
She on her back,legs parted wide,
My wife,my love,beautiful bride,
Him poised,erection big and throbbing,
Jutting out proud,erect and bobbing.

He slid inside with a smooth,steady thrust,
My wife now eager,consumed with lust,
They squirmed,jerked,writhing in mutual pleasure,
My wife the prize,the ultimate treasure,
Gliding inside so velvety,tight and slick,
She wriggled impaled upon his dick.

Then he filled her with floods of his seed,
Her legs round his waist,urging,hungry,full of need,
She milked him,drained him dry,
He gave a sobbing,drawn out cry,
My wife now inhibitions gone without a trace,
Somehow different,showing a new face.

Raised on her elbows,smiled at me and beckons,
Legs shamelessly akimbo for my sloppy seconds,
So for us this works,the excitement,passion sharing,
So close,so happy together caring,
We share our thoughts,every deep desire,
Keeps our passion alight,full of fire.

Twenty two years married and so happy together.( to the many people that will be full of scorn for us)

I feel scorn for your inability to use the spacebar on your keyboard.

"Legs shamelessly akimbo for my sloppy seconds," --Might be the most anti-poetic line ever written.

 

[DearEmma]

What a difference a month makes. Thank you all, as always for your insight. The discussion helped me decide where I wanted to go with the poem, what balance to strike, and from greenmountaineer's comment (thank you, thank you *hug*), I may have succeeded somewhat.

Here is the final poem, "Gasp" barely recognizable from its original conception in my initial posts, that posted today as an erotic poem (my first!):

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=462725

I appreciate any and all feedback. Thank you.