Finding a new family...
- Thread starter Shankara20
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Bramblethorn
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So I got an email from new-brother late last night. Original-Mom took the news very well and is looking forward to meeting. I am going to have a phone call with new-brother later today.
Got my first email contact from new-sister expressing welcoming support and friend requests on Facebook from new-brothers wife and son - new-sister-in-law and new-nephew all last night.
So,
hooray!
Shankara20
Well, that is lovely
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Thank you everyone for your good wishes.
New Found Family Update!
I really have no idea how to approach writing up this update. Several week ago I recounting my finding and connecting with my birth family after having been adopted at birth 70 years ago. So a short version will just have to do.
The incredible part is not in my finding them as much as who these wonderful people are that have all opened up to welcome me. My two delightful siblings have been working with tenderness and care to facilitate my connecting with other family members. They visited our Mother about two weeks ago and told her of my desire to make contact. They tell me that as she sorted out the story she responded positively and wants to meet me and know about my family. She also expressed a sense of closure knowing about me. Plans are underway for a visit in March. Mother and I have started exchanging emails. Her opening response to my first email of “Hello...We meet at last” still brings tears to my eyes. Finding out today from Sister that Mother has a photo I emailed to Brother printed and framed setting next to her chair take my breath away.
Brother and Sister are working to provide me with family history going back as far as possible. I have had welcoming contact from my Brother’s wife, a sister-in-law new to me and my Sister’s husband, a new brother-in-law. Brother’s son, a new nephew, has also been in contact. I had to set up an Excel spread sheet to track all these new people - really. I also purchased family tree software to lay out people in the family history going back into the 1600’s.
And I have the name of my father.
My own two son’s and their family are taking this in as fast as they can with excitement and interest and support. I never really thought out who all might be impacted by this, or how people might react. That said, I am so totally blown away by how wonderful and caring and excited and respectful and sweet and funny everyone I am in contact with is - the long-known family and new-found family.
Emotionally I’m bouncing all over the place - there are moments of concern about what could happen. I find it is difficult to give a hoot about my “to do” lists. My attention drifts while watching TV shows. Thankfully I have started a new mystery book that can hold my attention - for awhile. If something awaking me early morning I find it difficult to get back to sleep some days. And I would not trade any of this for the “not knowing” I had all those years.
The adventure continues….
New Found Family Update!
I really have no idea how to approach writing up this update. Several week ago I recounting my finding and connecting with my birth family after having been adopted at birth 70 years ago. So a short version will just have to do.
The incredible part is not in my finding them as much as who these wonderful people are that have all opened up to welcome me. My two delightful siblings have been working with tenderness and care to facilitate my connecting with other family members. They visited our Mother about two weeks ago and told her of my desire to make contact. They tell me that as she sorted out the story she responded positively and wants to meet me and know about my family. She also expressed a sense of closure knowing about me. Plans are underway for a visit in March. Mother and I have started exchanging emails. Her opening response to my first email of “Hello...We meet at last” still brings tears to my eyes. Finding out today from Sister that Mother has a photo I emailed to Brother printed and framed setting next to her chair take my breath away.
Brother and Sister are working to provide me with family history going back as far as possible. I have had welcoming contact from my Brother’s wife, a sister-in-law new to me and my Sister’s husband, a new brother-in-law. Brother’s son, a new nephew, has also been in contact. I had to set up an Excel spread sheet to track all these new people - really. I also purchased family tree software to lay out people in the family history going back into the 1600’s.
And I have the name of my father.
My own two son’s and their family are taking this in as fast as they can with excitement and interest and support. I never really thought out who all might be impacted by this, or how people might react. That said, I am so totally blown away by how wonderful and caring and excited and respectful and sweet and funny everyone I am in contact with is - the long-known family and new-found family.
Emotionally I’m bouncing all over the place - there are moments of concern about what could happen. I find it is difficult to give a hoot about my “to do” lists. My attention drifts while watching TV shows. Thankfully I have started a new mystery book that can hold my attention - for awhile. If something awaking me early morning I find it difficult to get back to sleep some days. And I would not trade any of this for the “not knowing” I had all those years.
The adventure continues….
twister947
Childless Cat Dude
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Fabulous. Best thread on Lit! So very happy for you!
yukonnights
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So true. Shank, following you on this is like a Hallmark movie...or something like that. That you are so open and willing to allow us to hear about your journey is a true gift from you to all of us. I'm confident that you are wise enough to navigate these uncharted waters and hopefully find a safe and wonderful anchorage awaiting you ~
Bramblethorn
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hooray!
cascadiabound
MrTs barmaid
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completely awesome is this Shank! Thank you for sharing this wonderful saga.
So wonderfully happy for you as you peel back this onion.
So wonderfully happy for you as you peel back this onion.
Shankara20
Well, that is lovely
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So true. Shank, following you on this is like a Hallmark movie...or something like that. That you are so open and willing to allow us to hear about your journey is a true gift from you to all of us. I'm confident that you are wise enough to navigate these uncharted waters and hopefully find a safe and wonderful anchorage awaiting you ~
I cannot express how much joy this brings my heart! So I can only imagine how much bouncing you are doing. Thanks so much for sharing this here. It's really big stuff.
completely awesome is this Shank! Thank you for sharing this wonderful saga.
So wonderfully happy for you as you peel back this onion.
Thank you all for your lovely comments. I will keep this thread updated from time to time as events unfold. You all are my "tribe of choice" and I feel so very much at home here, how can I not share this part of my life with you all?
I was longing for a quiet calm retirement as I move into my 70's. I have a great many to-be-read books and this has turned all that upside down. And this is just fine with me, but some of my postings in other threads will just have to be a little less.
A
Angedesoleil
Guest
I wanted to thank you for this thread. We've never spoken before, but I'm so glad it worked out for you, and that it has been positive all the way around. I'm also glad that your New Mother got the chance to know you, and know you are alright. Bless you all.
F
Farawyn
Guest
I love ya, Shank, and I’m so happy for your world turned upside down.
cookiecat
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I hope you don't mind I'm bumping this, Shankara. I'm a little worried since you haven't bumped it, the path to your new-found family might have a few twist and turns?
I've been thinking of you because I met my new aunt. My dad found out about 5 years ago he had a half sister. His mom never ever told anyone she had a child at a very young age. No one knows if my Grandpa knew. This woman contacted my dad and his siblings because she wanted to know her mom and her brothers and sisters.
I met her last weekend and it was such a lovely moment. I saw traces of my Grandma in her. It was heartwarming to listen to my dad talk about his mom and see his new sister take it all in.
She'd been searching for this side of her family for 50 years.
I'm not sure some of the family is so willing to share their mom with her. It's an odd thing.
All of these feelings, this moment - it got me thinking of you and wondering how this journey is going for you??
I've been thinking of you because I met my new aunt. My dad found out about 5 years ago he had a half sister. His mom never ever told anyone she had a child at a very young age. No one knows if my Grandpa knew. This woman contacted my dad and his siblings because she wanted to know her mom and her brothers and sisters.
I met her last weekend and it was such a lovely moment. I saw traces of my Grandma in her. It was heartwarming to listen to my dad talk about his mom and see his new sister take it all in.
She'd been searching for this side of her family for 50 years.
I'm not sure some of the family is so willing to share their mom with her. It's an odd thing.
All of these feelings, this moment - it got me thinking of you and wondering how this journey is going for you??
Shankara20
Well, that is lovely
- Joined
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I hope you don't mind I'm bumping this, Shankara. I'm a little worried since you haven't bumped it, the path to your new-found family might have a few twist and turns?
I've been thinking of you because I met my new aunt. My dad found out about 5 years ago he had a half sister. His mom never ever told anyone she had a child at a very young age. No one knows if my Grandpa knew. This woman contacted my dad and his siblings because she wanted to know her mom and her brothers and sisters.
I met her last weekend and it was such a lovely moment. I saw traces of my Grandma in her. It was heartwarming to listen to my dad talk about his mom and see his new sister take it all in.
She'd been searching for this side of her family for 50 years.
I'm not sure some of the family is so willing to share their mom with her. It's an odd thing.
All of these feelings, this moment - it got me thinking of you and wondering how this journey is going for you??
Interesting you should bump this now. We met over the weekend and it was wonderful. I am still in overload and trying to get some rest before telling the story. I will post something very soon.
It is lovely to read your story of a new aunt.
cookiecat
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Interesting you should bump this now. We met over the weekend and it was wonderful. I am still in overload and trying to get some rest before telling the story. I will post something very soon.
It is lovely to read your story of a new aunt.
Oh! I'm so glad for you.
Rest easy.
Shankara20
Well, that is lovely
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In the 3 1/2 years since I posted last to this thread sorting out my family tree rather took over my life. I did DNA testing and set up accounts in every public place possible, - Ancestry, 23andMe, FTDNA, GEDmatch, FamilySearch, MyHeritage, etc.
Tracking down matches and building up my family tree became sort of an obsession - as my family will attest. It eventually became one of the reasons I dropped out of Lit for the last many months. All my energy and focus, left over from all the other things LIFE sent along, went into that Family Tree stuff.
It is now starting to settle down. The big news is that I have finely establish direct contact with my birth-fathers surviving children - my 1/2 siblings.
I will offer an overview of that experience in a few days. I must trot off now to deal with, you know, stuff.
Tracking down matches and building up my family tree became sort of an obsession - as my family will attest. It eventually became one of the reasons I dropped out of Lit for the last many months. All my energy and focus, left over from all the other things LIFE sent along, went into that Family Tree stuff.
It is now starting to settle down. The big news is that I have finely establish direct contact with my birth-fathers surviving children - my 1/2 siblings.
I will offer an overview of that experience in a few days. I must trot off now to deal with, you know, stuff.
gracie920101
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How exciting for you!
But geez, you must post here once a month otherwise we all get super crabby.
But geez, you must post here once a month otherwise we all get super crabby.
Paul_Chance
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Pretty amazing story. That you for sharing it with us.
ToPleaseHim
JtohisPB/Brooke :)
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SHANK SIGHTING!!
