For Select Sophisticated Ladies in Need of Dirty Talk, Name Calling, Guided Masturbation and More

[JohnnyValentine]

Juicing and Jiggling with Jane (inspired by Mr. Penniman) - Tribute 2:

There's a big-titted woman with a two-wheeled cart
People think she's crazy but I'd say she's smart
You can see her every day going up and down the street
Always hollering out "something good to eat"
I got it, ooh baby, I got it, woo baby, I got it, I can't do without it

 

[JohnnyValentine]

"Eat my black-eyed peas and a-buttered beans"
"Drink my fresh milk for all your protein"
I got it, ooh baby, I got it

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Smoked ham, eggs and jam
Cornbread and candied yams
I got it, ooh baby, I got it

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Well, it ain't what you do, it's the way how you do it
It ain't what you eat, it's the way how you chew it
I got it, ooh baby, I got it

Ye-e-e-s, I got it, hmm baby, I got it, woo-oo-oo milky baby, I got it, ooh sweet baby, I got it, yes tasty baby, I got it, I can't do without it, Y-E-A-H

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Juicing and Jiggling with Jayne (inspired by Mr. Penniman) - Tribute 3:

(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)

If she walks by, the menfolks get engrossed
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
If she winks an eye and the bread slice turn to toast
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
If she got a lot of what they call the most

 

[JohnnyValentine]

The girl can't help it, she was born to please
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
And if she's got a figure made to squeeze
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Won't you kindly be aware, the girl can't help it
(The girl can't help it)
If she mesmerizes every mother's son
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
If she smile and beefsteak become well done
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
She make grandpa feel like twenty-one

 

[JohnnyValentine]

The girl can't help it, she was born to please
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)
And if I go to her on bended knees
(She can't help it, the girl can't help it)

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Won't you kindly be aware, that I can't help it
(I can't help it)
Because I'm hoping obviously
That someday the answer would be
The girl can't help it if she will rock with me

Love and thanks Jayne. You were the girl born to please and with a lot of what they call the most. Rest in Peace

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Miss Lucille Boasting of Her Gluttony in 1933 - Tribute 1:

I got a man I love, I got a man I like
Every time I fuck them mens, I give them the doggone claps
Ohhhhh baby, give them the doggone clap
But that’s the kind of pussy that they really like

 

[JohnnyValentine]

I told them I’ve got a good cock
And it’s got four damn good names
Rough top
Rough cock
Tough cock
Cock without a bone

Note: "Cock" was used as slang for female genitalia among some Southern country black people during the early-to-mid 1900s. However, in this case, Miss Lucille may have used the term to play around with normal gender roles.

 

[JohnnyValentine]

You can fuck my cock and suck my cock
Or leave my cock alone
Ohhhhh baby
Honey, I piss all night long
You can fuck my cock or suck my cock
Baby until the cows come home

 

[JohnnyValentine]

You know both of my men, they are tight like that
They got a great big dick just like a baseball bat
Oooooh fuck me, do it to me all night long
I want you to do it to me baby
Honey till the cows come home

 

[JohnnyValentine]

They know I'm a bitch from Baltimore
I got hairs on my cock that will sweep the floor
I got spunk from them hairs that will shet the door
And I look over your hands seeing I'm a bitch from Baltimore
Ohhhhh talking about a bitch from Baltimore
And I got hairs on my cock, sweep anybody's floor

 

[JohnnyValentine]

I got a big fat belly, I got a big broad ass
And I can fuck any man with real good class
Talking about fucking
Talking about grinding baby, all night long
And I can do it to you honey, until the cows come home

 

[JohnnyValentine]

If you suck my pussy baby, I’ll suck your dick
I'll do it to you honey till I make you shit
Ohhhhh baby, honey do it all night long
Do it to me papa
Break me if it's still tomorrow time

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Miss Lucille Demonstrating Her Dirty Jive in 1935 - Tribute 2:

I got nipples on my titties big as the end of my thumb
I got somethin’ between my legs, that'll make a dead man cum
Ohhhhh daddy, baby won’t you shave ‘em dry
Want you to grind me baby, grind me until I cry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Say I fucked all night and all the night before, baby
And I feel just like I wanna fuck some more
Ohhhhh great God daddy, grind me honey and shave me dry
And when you hear me holler baby, want you to shave it dry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

I got nipples on my titties big as the end of my thumb
Daddy, you say that's the kind you want and you can make ‘em cum
Ohhhhh daddy, shave me dry
And I give you somethin’ baby, swear it’ll make you cry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

I’m gonna turn back my mattress and let you oil my springs
I want you to grind me daddy till the bells do ring
Ohhhhh daddy, want you to shave ‘em dry
Oh great God daddy, if you can't shave ‘em baby won’t you try

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Now if fuckin' was the thing that would take me to heaven
I’d be fuckin' in the studio till the clock strike eleven
Ohhhhh daddy, daddy shave ‘em dry
I would fuck you baby, honey I'd make you cry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Now your nuts hang down like a damn bell sapper
And your dick stands up like a steeple
Your goddamn asshole stands open like a church door
And the crabs walks in like people
Wooo, baby won’t you shave ‘em dry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

A big sow gets fat from eatin’ corn
And a pig gets fat from suckin’
Reason you see this whore fat like I am
Great God, I got fat from fuckin’
Whee, shave 'em dry

 

[JohnnyValentine]

My back is made of whalebone
And my cock is made of brass
And my fuckin’ is made for working men’s two dollars
Great God around to kiss my ass
Oooh daddy, shave ‘em dry

Love and thanks Miss Lucille. Your catalogue of Classic Blues music (pre-World War II) was unsurpassed. Your songs helped lay the groundwork for black feminism but you are still inexplicably overlooked by blues scholars and cultural historians. Rest in Peace

 

[JohnnyValentine]

Strolling Up and Down the Big Town with Ronnie - Tribute 1:

Well, big town, big town
Every night's Saturday night
Anything, anywhere, anytime
That's what I like
I hear the saxes screaming
The cats are swinging
Oh, big town