Form letter for newcomers

[destinie21]

I for one want a motto

eschew obfuscation

Talk is Cheap, until you hire a lawyer.

What's another word for Thesaurus?

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing

I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?

I'm out of bed and dressed, What more do you want?

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

Where are we going? And what's with this hand basket?



A day without sunshine is like, night


"Me fail English? That's unpossible" (from the lips of ralph wiggum of the simpsons)


Ps can a question be a motto?

 

[Just-Legal]

"Watch out for KillerMuffin, she can, will, and does bite. Usually in a way that leaves you feeling half hurt and half awed."

 

[Rumple Foreskin]

Ps can a question be a motto?

---- WHY NOT? ----

Rumple Foreskin

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

Hmmmm....how about "Caveat Pre-emptor"

 

[cahab]

Re: and don't forget

"There is nothing new under the sun. Don't try to be clever. You will just annoy us all. Quasi is the only one here that is allowed to be clever."

b

I forget exactly who it was, but somebody once related their first day at Cambridge University and being told:

'Don't try to be clever. Everyone here is clever. Just try to be kind, a little kind.'

I hereby submit this for the letter.

 

[snooper]

On a serious note

The best advice for newbies ANYWHERE is:

Read the damned FAQs before posting your questions.

 

[snooper]

On an equally serious note

English comes in many dialects, the correct one and everybody else's.

Verb cases:

I write perfect English,

You make the odd mistake,

They are illiterate.

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: and don't forget

I forget exactly who it was, but somebody once related their first day at Cambridge University and being told:

'Don't try to be clever. Everyone here is clever. Just try to be kind, a little kind.'

I hereby submit this for the letter.

Oh, I really like this, Cahab.

Motto: When in doubt, leave it out.

 

[MathGirl]

Form letter to newcomers

After collating, weighing, sifting, and sorting all the input from regulars at the AH, there seems to be a consensus. The final form of the letter is as follows:
-------------------------------------
Dear Asshole,

Welcome to the Authors' Hangout at Literotica.

Bugger off.

Sincerely,
Your Friends at the Authors' Hangout
----------------------------------------

I hope this is satisfactory to everyone, and your helpful input was appreciated.
MG

 

[Guest]

 

[MathGirl]

gives me a warm fuzzy feeling.

Dear Nosey,
Good. That's just the effect I was trying for.
MG

 

[Guest]

Skill

 

[Why]

Bugger noun impolite (Oh yes?) an insulting word form some who is stupid or annoying. a. informal used for expressing sympathy about someone you like or feel sorry for the poor little bugger's broken his leg

Be a bugger: to be difficult

Bugger all: nothing at all.

Playing silly buggers: to behave in a silly way.

Bugger a'bout: to waste time

Bugger off: used for telling someone to go away

Bugger up: to spoil something

Bugger it: used for saying you are annoyed.

Buggered: broken or used for emphasizing that you won't do something or you don't know something.

Does it not amaze you that all this comes from the word Bugger, which means someone who practices Buggery......

 

[MathGirl]

Originally posted by Why which means someone who practices Buggery......

Dear Why,
Is that like .. um .. fly swatting? Studying insects?
MG

 

[Guest]

 

[Why]

Dear Why,
Is that like .. um .. fly swatting? Studying insects?
MG

Game to the lady, new balls please......

(Why tips his panama hat and offers the lady an orange juice.)

 

[oggbashan]

Motto

parva leves capiunt animas

Translated "small minds concern themselves with trifles"

But whether that is the newbies or us?

Or qui bene amat bene castigat

"he who loves well chastises well" Is that a motto for BDSM?

Or timeo Danaos et dona ferentes

"I fear the Greeks even when they are bearing gifts" i.e. Watch out! The inhabitants bite.

Og

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Dear Bastard/Bitch,

Welcome to Author's Hangout, where Great Minds stay the hell out, and Perverted Minds come to play.

In here, you may relax, take a poll, ask silly questions, be ridiculed for said questions, get into heavy fights, receive clever advice on everything Lit-related, make friends, and get your head biten off.

There are, however, a few rules you must follow:

1. Never, ever, call Svenskaflicka "Sven", unless you're looking to die a slow and painful and highly embarrassing death.
2. Don't get into fights with KillerMuffin.
3. Don't use Gerunds; they are forbidden in here. There are plewnty of Gerunding-free zones outside the Hangout.
4. Remember to pay respect to BlackSnake's Mighty Dick.
5. Never, ever, call Svenskaflicka "Sven", unless you're looking to die a slow and painful and highly embarrassing death.
6. Don't patronize Earl just because he's a little boy.
7. Don't poop in MathGirl's garderobe.
8. Don't feed the trolls.
9. Never, ever, call Svenskaflicka "Sven", unless you're looking to die a slow and painful and highly embarrassing death.
   [/list=1]
   
   Sincerly yours,
   
   Svenskaflicka
   Goddess of Vice (but you can just call me "goddess", if you want)

 

[Pop-O]

Yeah! i'm a newbie

Thought i'd better jump in and get my feet (or other body parts) wet. I've posted my 1st story in Lit. and revising some of my others before submitting them. Hope i've finally found a home.

Roger

 

[Guest]

Welcome home then, Roger. Read the first sentence of Anna Karenina then come back. We're not a happy family (that would be sooooooo boring) but we have fun.

cheers, Perdita

 

[Guest]

 

[Pop-O]

Happy is a relative term!

 

[MlledeLaPlumeBleu]

WHAT THE *@#$$@%*!! are you talking about, MOM???


Of course we're a $#@%!! happy family!


Welcome home, Roger.

 

[Wantonica]

I'm happy,

even when I run out of medication and my SO has conveniently hidden the ax, all the butchering knives and even my nail file and favorite pen. I guess he's afraid I'll write him a note.

Happy day,
Wantonica (with a moniker misunderstood in the real world to mean Chinese soup or 'want to nica'; if you don't know what nica is, please don't share your density by asking me)

 

[Svenskaflicka]

sven will we see you again?

Coming to get ya...