Hey, hey, hey! Looks who's here!

[Rowdy Ted]

Confession:
I'm a claustrophobic vibrator. Last week I saw this nice lady psychiatrist and by the time the hour was up we were both on the sofa! No wonder I'm a shaking, nervous wreck.

 

[JUDO]

Mmmm... Nothing like a rousing lay to put my broken persona back together. As my psych was want to say,"And, how did that make you feel?"


- Judo

 

[WickedEve]

Sousa Gets Inspiration

"Five minutes tops...
That's how long you got, Pops."
She said, droppin' her panties
In these squalid motel shanties.

Today's hot in the shade
After the Fourth of July parade,
But times are tough.
"It's twenty! Don't give me no guff."

She hikes down striped pants
And smiles at the lance
Testing the limits of silk.
"Old man, gonna deliver some milk?"

He smiles, twirls his moustache,
Gives pert breasts a quick tongue lash,
Then bends her down low
'Til her prize winks "Hello."

Her lips glisten like shined brass
He wants to plunge it in he ass,
But considering the pleasure-pain
Decides to wait for the break strain.

On the downbeat, she shouts,
"You're not like my usual louts."
With a refined beat of baton,
He grinned from the end she sat on,

And quick-marched to one-twenty.
She laughed, but not from funny,
From the pleasure, she prayed on
As the band behind played on.

Double time, her breath blew
Between her legs the hot stew
Drove a note, right and sure,
From her lungs, high and pure.

She fell upon the spread
As he zipped and left the bed,
Throwing a Jefferson to flutter
While she finished a final shudder.

Shiny shoes and gold buttons
Silver braids and graying muttons,
White gloves and and winning grin
Left the room that she stayed within.

A remembered face that she'd seen.
"Then maybe not, perhaps a dream?"
But then outside, the band, too clever
Started "The Stars and Stripes Forever."

Hmmm... I had a dream about elves in a toy shop -- an adult toy shop. Those dildos were bigger than their little bodies. Odd thing was, those dildos were life-sized -- modeled after their own elfin genitals. And every groundhog's day the elves would deliver these magnificent toys to lonely housewives and curious men. I bet that would make an interesting poem also, Judo...

*waiting to see if another poem magically appears within the next hour... hee hee*

Ted, your confession touches me deeply... very deeply.

 

[JUDO]

Originally posted by WickedEve ]Hmmm... I had a dream about elves in a toy shop -- an adult toy shop. Those dildos were bigger than their little bodies. Odd thing was, those dildos were life-sized -- modeled after their own elfin genitals. And every groundhog's day the elves would deliver these magnificent toys to lonely housewives and curious men. I bet that would make an interesting poem also, Judo...

Uh, eating bon-bons late at night again, Eve?

It would make a much better Ralph Bakshi-esque children's animated film. Hmmm... Now, what could we call it?

"The Underground Hog Express"
"Vibrating Toys for Good Girls and Boys"
"Get Along, Little Dildo"
"Deep into the Night We Go"
"Batteries Not Included"
"The Elfin Magic Lonely Hearts' Club"

or something like that.

*waiting to see if another poem magically appears within the next hour... hee hee*

It's Judo, not Rumplestiltskin!

Ted, your confession touches me deeply... very deeply.

Pbbbt!


- Judo

 

[WickedEve]

It's Judo, not Rumplestiltskin!


- Judo

Am I too demanding?

 

[Rowdy Ted]

Am I too demanding?

You sure were last night.

I'd like to announce that I have just submitted my first poem, proving that a dildo has something to say!


Angeline, I know that was you who tried to take my batteries last night. I never thought you'd stoop to murder!

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Sousa Gets Inspiration

Freak...

 

[Disposa Girl]

Careful Plastic Boy!

I hear you've got a mighty claim
Some big buzz about your fame

Just because you're hard and pink
And that's not such a much I think

I'm here now--the goddess queen
Proctector of sweet Angeline

If I were you I'd watch my whine
Not tempt by stepping out of line

Lest you're tossed--another toy
Who knows not ins and outs of joy

 

[Guest]

what the heck..?!

Geez, I make myself scarce for 2 or so weeks and when I check the poetry threads, well, this is what I find! Sick, sick, sick! You are all just sick! ...And I've been missing all the fun!!!!! I haven't been gone THAT long... and suddenly there are talking dildos invading poetic spaces I don't know *sniff*. I feel left out *sob*.

-Xtaabay
in the spirit of this thread I present you with the following bad poetry:



Ode to a Pyrex Playtoy

Oh Glass Phallus of my palace!
Hard and smooth
you fill my groove.

Neither physical shock nor temperature extremes
compromise structural integrity.

Colored swirls, dazzling light
Twist and twirl,
What a sight!

Always confident in your rigidity
You perform most elegantly.

Glide and bump
Slide and turn

You this girl could never spurn.

Safe during day
in velvet sack

You know I'll always
invite you back.

This bad poetry brought to you courtesy of Xtaabay

 

[Angeline]

He's Everywhere....

I just got the following email:

Subj: Puppy Naming Contest - Freelance Writing Organization - Int'l
Date: 26 Jan 2003 18:13:54 -0000
From: FWO-INTL@lb.bcentral.com
----------------------------------------------------------------
Hi folks!

We've got a puppy naming contest going on to name a beautiful Lhasa Apso dog.
We're even thinking of giving away some money for the best name. If you're
interested, click here to read the details:

http://www.fwointl.com/worf.html

Take care,
Rowdy

____________________________


I'm beginning to think he's real.