How do you mend a broken heart?

[MaryanneB]

You have to realize that the guidelines for grief are the same for death as they are for the loss of a relationship.

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

You could always try accepting that online relationships are bunch of phooey and vow to never ever enter into one again..

I've spent the last several months convincing myself that they're nothing but icky, yucky, mess-with-your-head, train wrecks waiting to happen.


I'm almost ready to believe it.

 

[KarenB59]

But just like with any kind of relationship that doesn't work out. You tell yourself the next one will be different and could very well the time you find the pony after digging through the manure.

 

[RubenesqueAphrodite]

But just like with any kind of relationship that doesn't work out. You tell yourself the next one will be different and could very well the time you find the pony after digging through the manure.

Honey, I've dug through enough manure online (and offline) I could feed all of Africa with organic produce... For the next century....

I do, however, wish the online lovers luck...

With their gardening...
And fertilizer.

 

[RacyWilde]

I have tried booze a good drunk but don't stay in the bottle to long. In my past I have a 30 day period I tried to drink a girl off my mind. I know I drank but can't remember more than that. A good friend kicked me in the ass and brought sanity back to me. Get mad but don't hurt others. Keep busy.
That the best I can do.
One last thing. Our relationships both good and bad help us become mostly and hopefully a better person. Mine changed me some. I think for the better. It took a special woman to break down that wall. That was 27 Years ago. I know she has her baggage too.

Yikes! I'm actually not a drinker. I stopped drinking when I was 17 And, I eat healthy so stuffing my face with cake wouldn't work either...lol.

Thanks

 

[RacyWilde]

You have to realize that the guidelines for grief are the same for death as they are for the loss of a relationship.

Yes, I'm sensing that... I'm in an out of anger, bargaining, sadness, acceptance... and then it starts again the next hour...lol.

You could always try accepting that online relationships are bunch of phooey and vow to never ever enter into one again..

I've spent the last several months convincing myself that they're nothing but icky, yucky, mess-with-your-head, train wrecks waiting to happen.


I'm almost ready to believe it.

I know... As a dancer, it is easy for me to hide my mind and heart in real life because I usually communicate with my ultra ego. But, online there gets a point when my mind and heart is exposed... that's when I become vulnerable.

But I guess it's worth going through the heartaches to find the keepers.

But just like with any kind of relationship that doesn't work out. You tell yourself the next one will be different and could very well the time you find the pony after digging through the manure.

I think it makes me vet more thoroughly...lol. I think it makes me hone into what kind of person I'm looking for... not in terms of personality, but in terms of sanity and having their shit together...lol.

Honey, I've dug through enough manure online (and offline) I could feed all of Africa with organic produce... For the next century....

I do, however, wish the online lovers luck...

With their gardening...
And fertilizer.

Hmm... I guess I have a lot of dung piles to get through on my journey. I guess just knowing that help me prepare for it.

 

[daddysbaby150]

Thank you

I'm just going to write my unconnected thoughts right here...

I'm actually glad that no one has said (yet) "There's plenty of fish in the sea." I've always believed that there is only one of each of us. I'm sure a fisherman knows the difference in each catch even though they are all marlin. It is the experience of them that is unique.

It seems unfathomable to me how humans can love and yet live without each other. Love doesn't mean you have to live inside each other's lives... it is an energy that can empower when needed - weaving in and out to create the tapestry of your existence. The only reason we have to give up a perfectly good love is because of the silly rules we must live by, rules that were made up to stop 'jealousy'. There is no jealousy if there is no possession. Possessing love is trapping it - locking it into a place. Sure it might still live but it's brightness cannot extend. The need to own things is what puts the human race in such a deplorable state.

But, I know how new love can heal, though that is a chance I'm not willing to take. I'd prefer to rely on myself, for I will always be there for me in my time of need, in my troubles and sorrow, in my happiness and peace. My first love that should heal me should be of myself. It's easy to say, but hard in practice.

I hate the fish in the sea metaphor too. We are people. With hearts and feelings. And it takes a lot more than a hook to catch us. And I also agree that new love can heal. But like you, it's not a love that I can set myself up to find. I've found just getting to a point where I love myself is the best thing I can do. One day I will get blindsided again. But I'm not about to go fishing for it.