How to ask Mom if I can fap in her room?

[Bramblethorn]

Bramblethorn said that my Mom's lack of action/talking was a sign that she was uncomfortable.

Point of fact: I did not say that at any point. I focussed on that "ugh", which is pretty much universally recognised as a sign of disgust.

Since you mention it, I certainly do think it very plausible that her silences at other times were driven by discomfort. But it's not what I said, and you've conveniently ignored the part where I highlighted a positive verbal signal of discomfort/disgust.

 

[littlecordelera]

Hey Pineapple, I think you need to approach this topic with your mom in a very delicate manner, so here is my suggestion.

First, go ask your mom if she knows a good way to clean silver jewelry.

Second, come back in here and tell me what she says.

 

[PineappleKevin]

Point of fact: I did not say that at any point

. I focussed on that "ugh", which is pretty much universally recognised as a sign of disgust.

Since you mention it, I certainly do think it very plausible that her silences at other times were driven by discomfort. But it's not what I said, and you've conveniently ignored the part where I highlighted a positive verbal signal of discomfort/disgust.[/QUOTE]

It wasn't a really disgusted '' Ugh '', it was more like a '' Oh you're doing that again? Alright go ahead and finish '' . The thing is that '' Ugh '' isn't even a proper word and it can be said in many ways. I don't even think she said that! I don't remember the exact words used in that situation I just remember the overall attitude.

And no she wasn't laughing because she was uncomfortable. I know what an uncomfortable laugh sounds like. She was laughing like '' Haha look at you sitting there doing the nasty! ''. But there's no point in talking, its not like you're going to believe me. You apparently know more about the situation than the guy who was actually there.

 

[Bramblethorn]

Also I'm curious but what do you think of the Louis CK sexual assault scandal? A lot of people defamed him

because he once

(repeatedly)

masturbated in front of 2 women,

(Five women reported similar incidents to NYT). LCK admitted that their stories are true.

even though he asked them beforehand if he could do it.

...so, if I *ask* you if I can punch you in the face and take your money, that's okay? It's just the "asking" that matters, not whether you agree?

"As soon as they sat down in his room, still wrapped in their winter jackets and hats, Louis C.K. asked if he could take out his penis, the women said. They thought it was a joke and laughed it off. “And then he really did it,” Ms. Goodman said in an interview with The New York Times."

Another of the women states that she could hear him masturbating on the phone as they spoke - there's no indication that he asked for or received consent.

One of the women who spoke to the NYT did say yes. But at the time she was in her early twenties, working in production on a show where LCK (about ten years older) was a writer and producer. It's not clear whether he was directly in her line of management, but at the very least he was in a senior position that creates a power imbalance.

The NYT article implies that she felt pressured to say yes - "he abused his power" - and if you've been paying any attention at all to the Harvey Weinstein scandal, there are good reasons for that. An influential man can easily break the career of a young woman who says "no" to him.

Even LCK's own "apology", for all its self-serving excuses, acknowledges this: "These stories are true... when you have power over another person, asking them to look at your dick isn’t a question. It’s a predicament for them".

It is not ethical for a guy in a position of power to make that sort of invitation for a woman in the workplace when he has the power to wreck her career. Not even if he asks and she says "yes".

And yet a lot of people are calling him the bad guy in the situation. What do you think of him?

Jesus fuck, YES, he's the bad guy, and it's creepy as fuck that you're trying to defend a man who has at least acknowledged that his behaviour was wrong and that part of the problem was his own fans refusing to listen to these women.

And you still haven't given me a reason why she would hesitate to say '' Close your door, while you do that. ''.

Maybe she has serious concerns about your ability to understand notions of consent?

Kevin, you're a loser...a 23 yo mama's boy who I'm guessing is unemployed, living with and sponging off of Mommy. Not to let her off the hook, she is your enabler. Get a life, mate.

We're only hearing Kevin's version of events here. It's possible that his mother's would be very different.

 

[PineappleKevin]

(repeatedly)



(Five women reported similar incidents to NYT). LCK admitted that their stories are true.



...so, if I *ask* you if I can punch you in the face and take your money, that's okay? It's just the "asking" that matters, not whether you agree?

"As soon as they sat down in his room, still wrapped in their winter jackets and hats, Louis C.K. asked if he could take out his penis, the women said. They thought it was a joke and laughed it off. “And then he really did it,” Ms. Goodman said in an interview with The New York Times."

Another of the women states that she could hear him masturbating on the phone as they spoke - there's no indication that he asked for or received consent.

One of the women who spoke to the NYT did say yes. But at the time she was in her early twenties, working in production on a show where LCK (about ten years older) was a writer and producer. It's not clear whether he was directly in her line of management, but at the very least he was in a senior position that creates a power imbalance.

The NYT article implies that she felt pressured to say yes - "he abused his power" - and if you've been paying any attention at all to the Harvey Weinstein scandal, there are good reasons for that. An influential man can easily break the career of a young woman who says "no" to him.

Even LCK's own "apology", for all its self-serving excuses, acknowledges this: "These stories are true... when you have power over another person, asking them to look at your dick isn’t a question. It’s a predicament for them".

It is not ethical for a guy in a position of power to make that sort of invitation for a woman in the workplace when he has the power to wreck her career. Not even if he asks and she says "yes".



Jesus fuck, YES, he's the bad guy, and it's creepy as fuck that you're trying to defend a man who has at least acknowledged that his behaviour was wrong and that part of the problem was his own fans refusing to listen to these women.



Maybe she has serious concerns about your ability to understand notions of consent?



We're only hearing Kevin's version of events here. It's possible that his mother's would be very different.

A lot of those claims are BS. How does someone '' hear '' someone else masturbate on the phone? Could she hear the subtle sounds of the side of his hand rubbing hitting against his balls? Men usually don't make sounds when they masturbate. If he was moaning, then the woman could have said '' I heard him moaning while he was talking to me, sounded like he was masturbating. ''. But she didn't say that. She instead made a very abstract statement.

Also how is Louis supposed to know that those two women thought it was a joke? He probably asked the question seriously and thought he had gotten a serious answer. It's not that hard to say '' No, don't do that Louis. ''. And what stopped them from saying '' No '' after he started?

Yeah Louis' behavior was not classy. He's definitely a pervert (kinda like me). But AFAIK he didn't technically break any laws or hurt anyone. If he did, he'd be in jail.


'' Maybe she has serious concerns about your ability to understand notions of consent? '' Do you really think a mother doesn't understand her own son and is unsure of how to approach him? That's what sounds like a fantasy to me. If she wants to send a message across to me, she sends it hard. Really hard. I've seen her angry side. She's not afraid to whack the sh*t out of me.

 

[twister947]

We're only hearing Kevin's version of events here. It's possible that his mother's would be very different.

You're right, and Kev's version is probably the fevered imaginings of a 14 year old. I think we're being tooled.

 

[Bramblethorn]

A lot of those claims are BS.

LCK said they were all true.

How does someone '' hear '' someone else masturbate on the phone? Could she hear the subtle sounds of the side of his hand rubbing hitting against his balls? Men usually don't make sounds when they masturbate.

Ah, I see you didn't bother reading the article you're responding to. For the benefit of those too lazy to click a link, the answer to your question is:

"She said she heard the blinds coming down. Then he slowly started telling her his sexual fantasies, breathing heavily and talking softly. She realized he was masturbating, and was dumbfounded."

Please take it from somebody who's actually had sex with other human beings, both in-person and over the phone: when somebody's trying to talk while masturbating, it's pretty recognisable, especially when they're talking sexy fantasies.

Also:

"In 2009, six years after their phone call, Ms. Schachner received a Facebook message from Louis C.K., apologizing. “Last time I talked to you ended in a sordid fashion,” he wrote in the message, which was reviewed by The Times. “That was a bad time in my life and I’m sorry.” He added that he had seen some of Ms. Schachner’s comedy and thought she was funny. “I remember thinking what a repulsive person I was being by responding the way that I did,” he wrote."

And then he admitted the allegation again, in his response to the NYT. This isn't even a he-said-she-said thing; he and she are agreeing on the exact same version of facts, you're the only one trying to pretend it didn't happen.

If he was moaning, then the woman could have said '' I heard him moaning while he was talking to me, sounded like he was masturbating. ''. But she didn't say that. She instead made a very abstract statement.

"He slowly started telling her his sexual fantasies, breathing heavily and talking softly". That seems pretty specific.

Honestly, if she had said "he was moaning", I bet you'd be telling us all about how moaning doesn't mean anything and maybe he had a toothache or his pet hamster just died and it's all a big plot against the dude.

Also how is Louis supposed to know that those two women thought it was a joke? He probably asked the question seriously and thought he had gotten a serious answer.

It's pretty fucking simple: if you aren't sure that you have consent, you don't fucking do it.

It's not that hard to say '' No, don't do that Louis. ''. And what stopped them from saying '' No '' after he started? Yeah I know...the thought that they can use the incident to gain fame and put Louis on the chopping block. That's probably what stopped them.

Yes, because showbiz is FULL of women who have managed to build a career out of making accusations against famous men. Absolutely full of them. Like, ah... what's her name... and that woman, you know, the one from that place...

And you're seriously claiming that their master plan was to let him jerk off and then wait fifteen years to go public and cash in on the incident? This is the stupidest thing I've heard all week.

It's tragic - and very revealing - just how far you're willing to contort yourself and make up fantasy scenarios rather than admit the possibility that some dude might actually have been a creepy sexual predator. Without even bothering to read the article that details the allegations against him. In the face of the response where he admits that the allegations are all true.

Yeah Louis' behavior was not classy.

No. Wearing a T-shirt to a corporate interview, asking for ice cubes in your red wine, that's "not classy". Jerking off in front of women at work, especially when you are in a position of power, that's predatory.

But still he didn't technically do anything wrong.

Pro tip: any time you find yourself using the word "technically" in a discussion about issues of sexual consent, chances are good that you should delete the entire sentence and go stick your johnson in an ice bucket while you think about the error of your ways.

And its really stupid that you compared the incident to a mugging scenario. In a mugging scenario, the mugger is forcing you to give them your money. There was no forcing here.

Dude, your assertion was that it's okay because he asked. The principle is the same whether it's masturbation or a punch in the face: "asking" doesn't actually establish consent.

Stop defaming men just for exercising their right to free speech.

Jizzing yourself in front of women who didn't invite it is not "free speech". Not even if you're talented enough to spell something out with it.

People can say whatever the hell they want.

Dude, you can demand that people "stop defaming men" or you can insist that "people can say whatever the hell they want", but you probably shouldn't put those two things in adjacent sentences. Do I really have to explain why those two positions aren't consistent?

Also, please go learn about what "defamation" is and isn't. You're making a fool of yourself.

'' Maybe she has serious concerns about your ability to understand notions of consent? '' LMFAO that's the most BS cringy thing I've heard. That's all just coming from the same B*llsh*t, MeToo movement, blame men for everything crap. Do you really think a mother doesn't understand her own son and is unsure of how to approach him?

Speaking as somebody who has actually raised a boy to adulthood, and with several good friends who are also raising boys right now: I can tell you with absolute certainty that it's VERY COMMON for a parent to have difficulty understanding their kid on some things, and to not know exactly how to approach him.

Fucksake, just read a parenting advice column or something, it's one of the most common things people ask about.

 

[bailadora]

I haven’t been here in ages, but someone told me about this thread and suggested I pop in for the laugh. Needless to say, it did not disappoint. The more things change, the more they stay the same. SMDH. Still, it’s nice to see some familiar faces taking the mouth breathers to task (I see you Rainie, Miles, Bram, Em!).

First rule of kink: make sure you have the enthusiastic, verbalized consent of all involved. This includes your audience.

Speaking as somebody who has actually raised a boy to adulthood, and with several good friends who are also raising boys right now: I can tell you with absolute certainty that it's VERY COMMON for a parent to have difficulty understanding their kid on some things, and to not know exactly how to approach him.

Fucksake, just read a parenting advice column or something, it's one of the most common things people ask about.

QFT.

 

[Jada59]

A lot of those claims are BS. How does someone '' hear '' someone else masturbate on the phone? Could she hear the subtle sounds of the side of his hand rubbing hitting against his balls? Men usually don't make sounds when they masturbate. If he was moaning, then the woman could have said '' I heard him moaning while he was talking to me, sounded like he was masturbating. ''. But she didn't say that. She instead made a very abstract statement.

<snip>

Men don't usually make sounds when they masturbate? Where is the laughing emoticon?

I heard a guy masturbating on the phone once. Once! That was enough to to tell me that I didn't particularly want to hear that ever again. And now, I'd just as soon not give details.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I haven’t been here in ages, but someone told me about this thread and suggested I pop in for the laugh. Needless to say, it did not disappoint. The more things change, the more they stay the same. SMDH. Still, it’s nice to see some familiar faces taking the mouth breathers to task (I see you Rainie, Miles, Bram, Em!).

Hey there! Good to see you.

 

[Emerson40]

A lot of those claims are BS. How does someone '' hear '' someone else masturbate on the phone? Could she hear the subtle sounds of the side of his hand rubbing hitting against his balls? Men usually don't make sounds when they masturbate. If he was moaning, then the woman could have said '' I heard him moaning while he was talking to me, sounded like he was masturbating. ''. But she didn't say that. She instead made a very abstract statement.

What?!? Are you coaxing your coagulant using some sort of stealthy dry-fist technique?

You gotta lube that bad boy up Kev! Slather on the pina cõlada flavoured water-based lube, liberally. When pumpin’ the wee peni, it should sound like when your ma vigorously mixes a fresh pot of Kraft dinner for you, with her big ol’ wooden spoon.

You keep grippin’ and rippin’ your weenus dry like that, it’s gonna look like you’ve been sticking it in a leatherback sea turtle’s mouth, by the time you’re 24.

I haven’t been here in ages, but someone told me about this thread and suggested I pop in for the laugh. Needless to say, it did not disappoint. The more things change, the more they stay the same. SMDH. Still, it’s nice to see some familiar faces taking the mouth breathers to task (I see you Rainie, Miles, Bram, Em!).

First rule of kink: make sure you have the enthusiastic, verbalized consent of all involved. This includes your audience.

La Belle Balerine!

 

[Jada59]

What?!? Are you coaxing your coagulant using some sort of stealthy dry-fist technique?

You gotta lube that bad boy up Kev! Slather on the pina cõlada flavoured water-based lube, liberally. When pumpin’ the wee peni, it should sound like when your ma vigorously mixes a fresh pot of Kraft dinner for you, with her big ol’ wooden spoon.

You keep grippin’ and rippin’ your weenus dry like that, it’s gonna look like you’ve been sticking it in a leatherback sea turtle’s mouth, by the time you’re 24.

<snip>

OMG! You said exactly what I was thinking!

 

[vibes]

You don't seem to like anyone's answer ... why don't you just fucking ask her? Maybe you find out she's been waiting for a facial forever

 

[ElectricBlue]

What?!? You gotta lube that bad boy up Kev! Slather on the pina cõlada flavoured water-based lube, liberally. When pumpin’ the wee peni, it should sound like when your ma vigorously mixes a fresh pot of Kraft dinner for you, with her big ol’ wooden spoon.

You keep grippin’ and rippin’ your weenus dry like that, it’s gonna look like you’ve been sticking it in a leatherback sea turtle’s mouth, by the time your 24.

You bastard! That's coffee on my screen, right there . Where are the tissues?

"Kevin dear, could you hand me the box of tissues, please. I've been following this great thread on Lit, and some of it's so funny... Kevin? ...oh, Kevin. Oh dear, what ARE you doing?"

 

[Jada59]

You bastard! That's coffee on my screen, right there . Where are the tissues?

"Kevin dear, could you hand me the box of tissues, please. I've been following this great thread on Lit, and some of it's so funny... Kevin? ...oh, Kevin. Oh dear, what ARE you doing?"

Poor Kevin failed Fapping 101.

 

[Bramblethorn]

You gotta lube that bad boy up Kev! Slather on the pina cõlada flavoured water-based lube, liberally.

If you like Piña Colada, and getting caught by your mum
If indecent exposure's what it takes you to come
If you like making love at midnight, in the palm of your hand
Just don't tell Literotica, 'cause they won't understand.

 

[Emerson40]

FAPPIN’ FACTS


Almost all the porn photos with spooge plastered on the face or boobs, and 99.9% of those internal, ‘cream-pie’ wank flicks are faked, using either pina colada mix, Cetaphil, or a combination of both.

Once all the pistoning peni scene is shot, a turkey baster, full of pina colada mix or Cetaphil, is used to inject fake spunk into the vagina or butt, so that media recording devices can capture copious coagulant oozing from orifice.

The same thinking is used in those gangy-bangy flicks where a few mopes pump spunk onto the eager face of the gang-bangee, leaving her looking like a glazed Krispy Kreme donut. For added effect, some creative types will even use crafty cameras angles and employ a hidden tube with a wee pump, along the underside of the schlong shaft, that can be used to ‘dispense’ pina colada mix, in generous, unimaginable creamy blasts, upon the spunky smile of the facial recipient.

 

[Emerson40]

 

[ElectricBlue]

In terms of audience engagement, it seems like good ol' Kevin and his reluctant mom get the Bronze medal, with the third highest number of posts in a thread on the current How To front page. That's got to be some kind of Literotica record, surely? It's an impressive achievement. If this was Facebook you'd be a sensation .

 

[Bramblethorn]

FAPPIN’ FACTS

Almost all the porn photos with spooge plastered on the face or boobs, and 99.9% of those internal, ‘cream-pie’ wank flicks are faked, using either pina colada mix, Cetaphil, or a combination of both.

Sheesh, dude, do you go around telling little children that Santa's really their parents?

 

[PineappleKevin]

Post of the day.

This is your 4th post on this thread. Even though I didn't reply to your first one. Go and fish for attention somewhere else. I can tell you're thirsty for it.

 

[Miles Long]

This is your 4th post on this thread. Even though I didn't reply to your first one. Go and fish for attention somewhere else. I can tell you're thirsty for it.

Hey now, be nice to Rainshine. Treat her like you would your mother. Ok maybe not exactly like that.

 

[Farawyn]

This is your 4th post on this thread. Even though I didn't reply to your first one. Go and fish for attention somewhere else. I can tell you're thirsty for it.

You’re a little douchetard, aintcha?

 

[removed9556]

 

[Emerson40]

This is your 4th post on this thread. Even though I didn't reply to your first one. Go and fish for attention somewhere else. I can tell you're thirsty for it.

Oh my.

I sure hope the Lustrous One will survive this spunky retort, ejaculated by Kev the chronic masturbator and sexual abuser of his poor, mistreated mother.