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Jamesbjohnson Is In The Building...

I should post a few of my poems, the feedback couldn't be any worse than what I get on some of my stories.:rolleyes:
 
Last night I looked for examples of the best poems and what I found was a whole page of poems by Maya Angelou and Langston Hughes. Blew my mind. Emily Dickinson kicks their asses every time, and I don't care for Dickinson, but no Dickinson was listed. Nobody I know of was listed. I predict Angelou will be as forgotten as Rod McKuen, in 5 years.

My thing is black noir. Much of whats out there sucks. Occasionally I find stories that are world class excellent. But the excellent rarely get much attention, what editors and perfessers prefer are tales of sulky, parasitic, whiny black losers with impossible demands of his white employers. The excellent stories are about the same people, who gain some insights about the nature of their circumstances, and change....a little or a lot. Great literature is about change. Great poetry is about important revelations.

This Is Just to Say
I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

WILLIAM CARLOS WILLIAMS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alLHqxJ-t_0
 
Last edited by a moderator:
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPnhaGWBnys

Maybe the most known poem set to music.

As a child I lived on Brae Burn Drive, and behind our house was the slope going to the stream, which is the translation of Brae Burn.
Click to expand...

Great words sang to a great tune.
Pity though about the pathetic performance of both. It should be a lot more rhythmically defined (not with so much free feel to it), 1st by its own use of poetic foot (iambic 15syllable in rhyming couplets) and 2nd by the rhythmic values of the tune itself which although in major 5tonic mode in the old Scotish tradition, sounds as rich as an almost 7tonic melody.
The style of performance should be a bit… piu maestoso (epic if one prefers) and certainly delivered with more robustness, not this pathetic wishy-washy, corny emotionality which makes a monkey out of both lyrics and melody.
So I would appreciate if your examples of "true poetry" and "true music" refer us to better performances of these. Let us never forget that poetry (in a lot of cases) and music (in all cases) are still in the domain of performing arts.
 
pelegrino said:
Great words sang to a great tune.
Pity though about the pathetic performance of both. It should be a lot more rhythmically defined (not with so much free feel to it), 1st by its own use of poetic foot (iambic 15syllable in rhyming couplets) and 2nd by the rhythmic values of the tune itself which although in major 5tonic mode in the old Scotish tradition, sounds as rich as an almost 7tonic melody.
The style of performance should be a bit… piu maestoso (epic if one prefers) and certainly delivered with more robustness, not this pathetic wishy-washy, corny emotionality which makes a monkey out of both lyrics and melody.
So I would appreciate if your examples of "true poetry" and "true music" refer us to better performances of these. Let us never forget that poetry (in a lot of cases) and music (in all cases) are still in the domain of performing arts.
Click to expand...

Others say theyre the best. Call it a hunch but I don't think we're gonna be friends, mostly cuz youre too fucking stupid for my taste, and too accustomed to getting plastic trophies for breathing, but have a nice day.
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPnhaGWBnys

Maybe the most known poem set to music.

As a child I lived on Brae Burn Drive, and behind our house was the slope going to the stream, which is the translation of Brae Burn.
Click to expand...
i enjoyed the wistful, thoughtful tone to this rendition, because it made me stop and listen and contemplate quietly about a piece i've only ever known a snatch of, bellowed out by loud party-goers. whilst the essence touched me at those parties, enough to bring a tear, the quieter version moves me in a different way... it's haunting.
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
Others say theyre the best. Call it a hunch but I don't think we're gonna be friends, mostly cuz youre too fucking stupid for my taste, and too accustomed to getting plastic trophies for breathing, but have a nice day.
Click to expand...

It was only a matter of time before the real JAMESBJOHNSON returned to the water's surface.

:rolleyes:
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
Others say theyre the best. Call it a hunch but I don't think we're gonna be friends, mostly cuz youre too fucking stupid for my taste, and too accustomed to getting plastic trophies for breathing, but have a nice day.
Click to expand...

Up yours, arsehole.
 
My first poem for money back in 1970.

Save for the feelings from our touch and glances
And their unconscious, unspoken revelations
A dark silence without end I do fear
If your eyes and body weren't so something sun like.
 
Tristesse2 said:
No matter how many times you flush some turds float...... :D
Click to expand...

I was actually thinking more along the lines of a shark swimming underwater waiting for an opportunity to nab a swimmer, but ...... the turd analogy works just as well.
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
My first poem for money back in 1970.

Save for the feelings from our touch and glances
And their unconscious, unspoken revelations
A dark silence without end I do fear
If your eyes and body weren't so something sun like.
Click to expand...

Someone deserves a refund.
 
I read some poems today. They remind me of the crap 4th rate Village beatniks usta write back in the 50s, the stuff people laugh at because the words are dissociated and incongruent with what honest people experience. Its melodrama.

I'd like to read one competent poem wharved at LIT.
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
I read some poems today. They remind me of the crap 4th rate Village beatniks usta write back in the 50s, the stuff people laugh at because the words are dissociated and incongruent with what honest people experience. Its melodrama.

I'd like to read one competent poem wharved at LIT.
Click to expand...

We would like for you to pull your head out of your ass.
 
JAMESBJOHNSON said:
I read some poems today. They remind me of the crap 4th rate Village beatniks usta write back in the 50s, the stuff people laugh at because the words are dissociated and incongruent with what honest people experience. Its melodrama.

I'd like to read one competent poem wharved at LIT.
Click to expand...

maybe start out by posting what you deem incompetent about the poems i linked you to before.
 
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