Make your reader climax in 200 words or less

[AnAngelReally]

199 words

I love to read in the coffee shop near the College. Read people, that is.

I sit in the corner with my ereader, hiding behind mirror Ray Bans, head lowered, eyes roaming.

The petite brunette is a regular. We have our routine. We greet, exchange a few words, retreat in our private worlds.

I’m shy. She’s the one who said hello first.

She was sad these last days. I found her cell number, texted anonymous uplifting messages. They made her smile. Too briefly.

Today, she glows, smiles at me brightly. She beams as she reads on her cell, touches the screen to her lips.

She leans on her table, touches her breast surreptitiously. Her fingers pinch her nipple. She’s flustered. The blush reaches down in her blouse. Fantasy or memory?

She fidgets on her chair, rubs her thighs together, then comes to a decision. She looks my way. I don’t react. We’re alone in the far corner.

Hand below the table, she unzips, reaches in. She’s good, only her wrist moves.

Our soft orgasms are synchronous, we smile at each other, lick our fingers, gazes locked.

She kisses my cheek on her way out.

I can’t wait for tomorrow.

 

[Isaera]

her lover's words | 200 words

"Holly," Adrien strains with aggravation. The girl palms his bulge beginning sucking noisily on his thigh. "Give me head already."

"And why should I?" A rouge blush stains her cheeks.

"You're so good and..." His staggered words rush through her ears, fingers digging into her hips delicate as dove's wings. "I haven't... I'm so close."

Before Adrien can take his next breath, a wet heat envelopes his cock. Holly's tongue skims the underside of his length. Slow enough to drive anyone insane, she swirls around the head. Holly's doe eyes stay irresistibly trained on the squirming mess before her.

She plunges Adrien whole into her mouth, consuming him as far back as her gag reflex allows. He was teetering on the edge as the hilt smashed the back of her throat. Holly didn't stop the sin she was committing but instead she sucked harder. Adrien didn't try to hold back exploding in her mouth. She was perfectly content to milk him dry of every last drop promptly swallowing whatever she could take.

"God. You're so beautiful." He lets a last moan and she finds she leaves her voice behind. Holly's heart swallows her lover's words and there she keeps them.

 

[rawsilk]

Gentle Gang Bang

He was behind me holding my cheeks open, me lying over the ottoman. I could feel the tip of his cock running between cunt and ass, deciding which one. It really didn't matter which one, both had been well used that night. Ramming his cock in deep, my cunt raw with use. Porn running on the TV. Been invited to a porn party, new experience. Didn't think it would be just me and fifteen huge footballers.

Each would thread his way to me, past his sprawling friends in an orderly fashion, take up position and spread me open. Some liked to look for a while, pulling me wider, fingers exploring me deep. Some liked to pull my lips open wide inspecting the inside of my swollen cunt. Some started fingering my asshole. Not many had fucked a girl's asshole. They did that night, over and over, even with jel some split my asshole a little, a few had massive cocks. There was a lot of laughter, good night for the boys. Finally someone asked if I did blow jobs. I smiled and nodded, that's when the excitement really began.



Words 189

 

[AverageGary]

Why is it that 6-word lines or a 30-word story is easy, but trying to compact a story into 200 words is so hard? For instance, I would love to have an extra 20 words or so to finish this story ...

After catching his wife cheating on him, Dominic brings his wife Bella to the bedroom and pushes her naked onto the bed. He takes a blindfold out the bag he’s holding and puts it on her. He tells her he thought the items in the bag could have been used for fun role-play, but now they’re going to be used to punish her infidelity. He puts her face down and uses fur-lined wrist restraints on her. Then he raises her ass in the air and gives it several swats with a rubber paddle. She winces with each hit as her ass is turning bright red. ‘Please don’t hurt me Dom’ she begs. He stays silent and takes out a whip. He runs it along the crack of her ass several times before giving her lower back several swats. She starts to cry. He then takes out a butt plug teasing her ass and pussy, which he notices is moist. He eases the butt plug into her ass, pumping it several times before leaving it in. Then he slams his cock into her pussy fucking her hard and fast before pulling out and cumming on her ass.

196 words

 

[rawsilk]

Why is it that 6-word lines or a 30-word story is easy, but trying to compact a story into 200 words is so hard? For instance, I would love to have an extra 20 words or so to finish this story ...

196 words

We are in a Challenging place Gary, if you can't say something in 200 words, how do you expect to say it in 2000?


It is an excellent thread, I had never come across before. It gives discipline to the writer, makes them think how they can use words and structure sentences in a different way. This is a brilliant writers tool. So many writers have long, ponderous stories. Imagine 2000 words or a whole novel written like a 200 worder. Ooooo! Hot! Action! Exciting! All you need is a good plot and interesting characters. It would have to be a best seller.

A question Gary, how did you find my story written in the first person through my eyes? Was it hot or would the third person have been better, where you could be the watcher, perhaps thinking you were one of the boys? I could rewrite it if you want, in the third person. Tell me what you think, or anyone else reading this if they want. Mind, I think the end has been blown!

...and talking about hot, yours' was great. Got there!

 

[AverageGary]

We are in a Challenging place Gary, if you can't say something in 200 words, how do you expect to say it in 2000?


It is an excellent thread, I had never come across before. It gives discipline to the writer, makes them think how they can use words and structure sentences in a different way. This is a brilliant writers tool. So many writers have long, ponderous stories. Imagine 2000 words or a whole novel written like a 200 worder. Ooooo! Hot! Action! Exciting! All you need is a good plot and interesting characters. It would have to be a best seller.

A question Gary, how did you find my story written in the first person through my eyes? Was it hot or would the third person have been better, where you could be the watcher, perhaps thinking you were one of the boys? I could rewrite it if you want, in the third person. Tell me what you think, or anyone else reading this if they want. Mind, I think the end has been blown!

...and talking about hot, yours' was great. Got there!

With mine, I'm glad you got there. I was afraid that because it was being done in anger instead of a more traditional D/S relationship that I would get details wrong or it wouldn't be as hot.
Your story was hot because I loved reading from the woman's viewpoint and thinking I was one of the guys. However did you chose that storyline because it's something you want to experience (or have experienced) or because it's something you thought would turn on your readers? Or both?

 

[rawsilk]

With mine, I'm glad you got there. I was afraid that because it was being done in anger instead of a more traditional D/S relationship that I would get details wrong or it wouldn't be as hot.
Your story was hot because I loved reading from the woman's viewpoint and thinking I was one of the guys. However did you chose that storyline because it's something you want to experience (or have experienced) or because it's something you thought would turn on your readers? Or both?

With your story, the question in the mind of this reader was, is this their way to play? Does she occasionally cheat knowing it annoys him, and he gets angry and is likely to play rougher, which is exactly what she wants, punishment and rougher sex. That was a very sexy, heightening of sexual tension in the story.

The negative was the name Dom. I missed that his name was Dominic and thought she was referring to him as Dom as in Dominant. It would have been unlikely a sub would refer to her Dom as Dom, more likely Sir or his first name, which in this case happened to be Dom. In a D/s story maybe another first name may have been a better choice. The second reading cleared that for me.

I was inspired to write mine from a thread over the way saying you couldn't write a gentle loving gang bang story. Ha! I thought. I can.

Where did the story come from you ask? I had a friend who was an enormous footballer, as were all his friends. I had met them when I went to a few football matches, to watch him play. As we say in Australia, 'built like a brick shithouse'! Meaning very big and strong.

We used to have the odd date here and there, but not constant companions. OK, fuck buddies! There I said it! One day he phoned me and said he was going to have a porn party, with a few friends and would I like to come? I doubted I was his first phone call, as we hadn't seen each other for ages. Just working through the list I guess. It took me less than a fleeting second to work out what the likely scenario might be, group sex with a bunch of massive footballers and their girlfriends. Another fleeting second went by and I said, ahh sorry Garry, I have a date that night.

It is just a fun fantasy about what might have been, which is a nice little thought for me every-so-often, I just decided I would share. I may share other adventures with Garry that are true.

 

[AverageGary]

With your story, the question in the mind of this reader was, is this their way to play? Does she occasionally cheat knowing it annoys him, and he gets angry and is likely to play rougher, which is exactly what she wants, punishment and rougher sex. That was a very sexy, heightening of sexual tension in the story.

The negative was the name Dom. I missed that his name was Dominic and thought she was referring to him as Dom as in Dominant. It would have been unlikely a sub would refer to her Dom as Dom, more likely Sir or his first name, which in this case happened to be Dom. In a D/s story maybe another first name may have been a better choice. The second reading cleared that for me.

I thought I had made it clear that this would've been their first time trying S/D play for fun, but his anger at catching her cheating turning into something rougher and she unexpectedly got turned on by it. I was unsure of calling him Dom, but thought since it was the couple's first time trying it (and my first attempt at writing it), he would be the dominant one. Looks like I missed there, I'll remember for next time.

I was inspired to write mine from a thread over the way saying you couldn't write a gentle loving gang bang story. Ha! I thought. I can.

Where did the story come from you ask? I had a friend who was an enormous footballer, as were all his friends. I had met them when I went to a few football matches, to watch him play. As we say in Australia, 'built like a brick shithouse'! Meaning very big and strong.

We used to have the odd date here and there, but not constant companions. OK, fuck buddies! There I said it! One day he phoned me and said he was going to have a porn party, with a few friends and would I like to come? I doubted I was his first phone call, as we hadn't seen each other for ages. Just working through the list I guess. It took me less than a fleeting second to work out what the likely scenario might be, group sex with a bunch of massive footballers and their girlfriends. Another fleeting second went by and I said, ahh sorry Garry, I have a date that night.

It is just a fun fantasy about what might have been, which is a nice little thought for me every-so-often, I just decided I would share. I may share other adventures with Garry that are true.

I remember reading that gentle gang-bang thread.
However, you didn't need to give the whole back story on what you wrote, just saying it was a fantasy about what might have been would've been sufficient
Since you used the term, I wish I could've had a fuck buddy in my younger days, but I was too shy and too ugly. I'm still ugly, but married and faithful, so I can't go searching for one in my late 40s.

 

[AverageGary]

A 200-word quickie that's not among my best efforts, but is similar in subject to a 29,000 word story I'm presently having edited...


During the times in his marriage when Joe went weeks without sex because his wife wasn’t interested, not feeling well, or it was her period, he escaped into a fantasy world because he wouldn’t cheat on her. He escaped into an online world of trading erotic stories with strangers. He also liked to masturbate thinking about the one that got away and how they would fuck. The one that got away was Jen, a well-proportioned blonde a couple of inches taller than him with heavy thighs, large breasts and hazel eyes. He would start with holding her long blonde hair while she blew him, gently dragging her teeth along his cock with her lips wrapped tight, her tongue running up and down the length to buying his face between her well-proportioned thighs and running his tongue along her slit, getting her wet. Then sliding up her body and easing his cock into her slowly at first, gradually picking up the pace. Eventually he would be thrusting into her hard and fast with her legs wrapped around his waist, pushing up to meet his thrusts. He would cum on his hand at the same time he pictured cumming in her pussy.

Words: 200

 

[rawsilk]

I remember reading that gentle gang-bang thread.
However, you didn't need to give the whole back story on what you wrote, just saying it was a fantasy about what might have been would've been sufficient
Since you used the term, I wish I could've had a fuck buddy in my younger days, but I was too shy and too ugly. I'm still ugly, but married and faithful, so I can't go searching for one in my late 40s.

I just thought the back story would amuse! Plus now I have put fuck buddy in your mind. You never know where that will pop up in a story.

No such thing as ugly, it is a face with character.

 

[rawsilk]

I thought I had made it clear that this would've been their first time trying S/D play for fun, but his anger at catching her cheating turning into something rougher and she unexpectedly got turned on by it. I was unsure of calling him Dom, but thought since it was the couple's first time trying it (and my first attempt at writing it), he would be the dominant one. Looks like I missed there, I'll remember for next time.

I just re-read your story and there was no mention of just being beginners. Which I think for the story did it no harm. It was very sexy with real sexual tension as I said.

 

[AverageGary]

I just re-read your story and there was no mention of just being beginners. Which I think for the story did it no harm. It was very sexy with real sexual tension as I said.

I thought it was implied when he said he bought the items for them to try for fun role play... unless I cut that out to get under 200.

 

[AverageGary]

I just thought the back story would amuse! Plus now I have put fuck buddy in your mind. You never know where that will pop up in a story.

No such thing as ugly, it is a face with character.

Need to work on eliminating the setup and getting right into the fucking for the fuck buddy story I have in mind. ;D
Thank you for the kind words, I must be quite a character. LOL

EDIT: Might try working fuck buddy into a pretzel story for the other thread

 

[rawsilk]

Thank you for the kind words, I must be quite a character. LOL

Think of it this way, you have movie star good looks that fall under 'character' actor category. There are plenty of sexy character actors out there. The late James Gandolfini did it for me and I know I am not alone there. It all depends on how you play your role!

Johnny Depp is a pretty toyboy, James Gandolfini was a man! If I had my choice......man, every time!

 

[AverageGary]

Think of it this way, you have movie star good looks that fall under 'character' actor category. There are plenty of sexy character actors out there. The late James Gandolfini did it for me and I know I am not alone there. It all depends on how you play your role!

Johnny Depp is a pretty toyboy, James Gandolfini was a man! If I had my choice......man, every time!

Thank you - but you haven't seen a picture of me LOL

 

[AverageGary]

One night while driving for Uber, Joe wound up picking up three attractive college-aged girls to drive back to their dorm. They asked Joe if he would be willing to come up to their room because they needed a body to practice on for anatomy class. A few minutes later, Joe was standing in front of them naked. Ann, a cute, thin brunette, was running her fingers along his muscles, as she named them. Karen, a full-figured long haired brunette, pointed at Joe’s cock which had grown hard at Ann’s touch, saying “that muscle is responding well.” Lisa a shapely blonde said “let’s give it some tests to make sure.” She stripped naked, got on her knees in front of him and started giving him a blowjob. Ann and Karen stripped and pushed Joe back onto a bed. Ann straddled his face and minutes later was moaning as Joe licked her pussy and clit to perfection. Karen pushed Lisa out of the way and rode his cock wildly as Lisa licked his balls. Joe didn’t last long in his first foursome as Karen was just too tight, but he recovered and spent the rest of the night with the girls.

Words: 200

 

[rawsilk]

One night while driving for Uber, Joe wound up picking up three attractive college-aged girls to drive back to their dorm. They asked Joe if he would be willing to come up to their room because they needed a body to practice on for anatomy class. A few minutes later, Joe was standing in front of them naked. Ann, a cute, thin brunette, was running her fingers along his muscles, as she named them. Karen, a full-figured long haired brunette, pointed at Joe’s cock which had grown hard at Ann’s touch, saying “that muscle is responding well.” Lisa a shapely blonde said “let’s give it some tests to make sure.” She stripped naked, got on her knees in front of him and started giving him a blowjob. Ann and Karen stripped and pushed Joe back onto a bed. Ann straddled his face and minutes later was moaning as Joe licked her pussy and clit to perfection. Karen pushed Lisa out of the way and rode his cock wildly as Lisa licked his balls. Joe didn’t last long in his first foursome as Karen was just too tight, but he recovered and spent the rest of the night with the girls.

Words: 200

Nice tight little piece in 200....and it made me laugh!

 

[AverageGary]

Nice tight little piece in 200....and it made me laugh!

Glad I could make you laugh
I was just aiming to write something tight and light-hearted.

 

[rawsilk]

Theirs was a spring and summer relationship. She was sweet, just becoming a golden-haired young beauty, he was older and well experienced. He held her head gently, looking into her soft brown eyes. He bent and kissed her tenderly without his tongue tasting her sweetness. He felt her melting and saw in her eyes, she had felt arousal. His hand began stroking her clothed breast, her eyes half closed. Carefully he unbuttoned her blouse, sliding his hand inside her bra, stroking the plump little mound, the nipple hardened.

He looked into her eyes again, they were gazing into space. He took her hand, leading her to his bedroom. He undressed her, kissing her lips and fondling her breasts. Gently guiding her to his bed and continuing to stroke her body "Do you want to make love, sweet girl?""yes" was softly whispered. He undressed and joined her on the bed, his body warm against her young skin. His fingers caressed her slit. He lifted himself over her, balanced on his arms, his legs spreading hers, cock finding its way past her lips. Gentle pushes, becoming more forceful until he claimed her virginity.


Words 194

 

[AverageGary]

Theirs was a spring and summer relationship. She was sweet, just becoming a golden-haired young beauty, he was older and well experienced. He held her head gently, looking into her soft brown eyes. He bent and kissed her tenderly without his tongue tasting her sweetness. He felt her melting and saw in her eyes, she had felt arousal. His hand began stroking her clothed breast, her eyes half closed. Carefully he unbuttoned her blouse, sliding his hand inside her bra, stroking the plump little mound, the nipple hardened.

He looked into her eyes again, they were gazing into space. He took her hand, leading her to his bedroom. He undressed her, kissing her lips and fondling her breasts. Gently guiding her to his bed and continuing to stroke her body "Do you want to make love, sweet girl?""yes" was softly whispered. He undressed and joined her on the bed, his body warm against her young skin. His fingers caressed her slit. He lifted himself over her, balanced on his arms, his legs spreading hers, cock finding its way past her lips. Gentle pushes, becoming more forceful until he claimed her virginity.


Words 194

That was highly erotic and beautiful

 

[AverageGary]

Mondays are the typical slow day at the office where Jack is sometimes the only one in the building. He was bored so he decided to throw caution into the wind. He locked the door, returned to his computer, opened up a private window on his web browser and started watching porn. He had his pants pulled down and was stroking his hard-on, lost in the movie when Becky, the buxom blonde bookkeeper had stopped in to work. She initially let out a shriek of shock when she saw what he was doing. Then she looked to his lap and grinned. "We're the only ones here and the door is locked," she said. "Give me an orgasm or I report you." Jack got up from his desk and unbuttoned her blouse burying his face in her cleavage as he undid her bra. She tugged at his cock as he sucked her nipples. He yanked her panties down, took her hand off his cock, pushed her onto a desk and plunged into her. He thrust harder and harder, moving her legs to his shoulders. Moments later, with a grunt and a moan, they came together in orgasmic bliss.

Words 198

 

[rawsilk]

Mondays are the typical slow day at the office where Jack is sometimes the only one in the building. He was bored so he decided to throw caution into the wind. He locked the door, returned to his computer, opened up a private window on his web browser and started watching porn. He had his pants pulled down and was stroking his hard-on, lost in the movie when Becky, the buxom blonde bookkeeper had stopped in to work. She initially let out a shriek of shock when she saw what he was doing. Then she looked to his lap and grinned. "We're the only ones here and the door is locked," she said. "Give me an orgasm or I report you." Jack got up from his desk and unbuttoned her blouse burying his face in her cleavage as he undid her bra. She tugged at his cock as he sucked her nipples. He yanked her panties down, took her hand off his cock, pushed her onto a desk and plunged into her. He thrust harder and harder, moving her legs to his shoulders. Moments later, with a grunt and a moan, they came together in orgasmic bliss.

Words 198

Slow day at the office? Write a 200 word quicky fantasy about a slow day at the office. Nice.

 

[AverageGary]

Slow day at the office? Write a 200 word quicky fantasy about a slow day at the office. Nice.

Thank you
Unfortunately in real life the bookkeeper is nothing like the fantasy.

 

[captainman2018]

On The Dining Room Table

It was on a rainy Friday night
that John suddenly woke up
after he heard a noise and
saw that his wife Karen was
not in the same bed with him.

That made John get out of
bed and go downstairs just
in time to see Karen sitting
naked on the dining room
table breathing heavily.

And it was no wonder for
another woman was licking
her pussy while a naked
stud was probing the
second woman's cunt.

And the whole scene was
being watched by several
figures in hooded robes
before one of them turned
and walked towards John.

Then, she slipped off the
robe to expose her body
and kneeled down in
order to suck John's
dick while he watched.

After that, John's new
fuck buddy laid herself
on top of the woman
sucking Karen's clit and
made John fuck her.

That was before John
looked at Karen's sweat
glazed tits and started
to suck on them before
she called his name.

And she gave John a
hard smack across the
face which made him
wake up in his own bed
and see the sun shining.

"Sorry to do that, John.
Time to get up.", Karen
had said.

 

[Jada59]

The heat was rising, along with his cock. I ran my fingers over the head, toying with his pre-cum before taking a taste. Then I sank down over his hardness and began fucking him slowly, picking up the pace in time with the music.

I was so aroused, it wasn't long before I began cumming fast and hard in a series of pussy clenching climaxes. He was pinned beneath me, groping at my breasts and moaning. We were both drenched with sweat and my pussy juice.

I let out a guttural moan as he pulled on my tits and made me cum even harder! That was all it took. His cock exploded inside of me, until we were both flooded with our combined juices. I reached back and began stroking his balls to milk every last drop out of him as I continued to stroke his cock up and down with the walls of my pussy.

We collapsed into each other, blissful and spent.