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[Richard49]

Re: Re: Re: Damn, Shadowsdream...Ya beat Me to it!

No sexual submissiveness is not a D/s thing. the labelling of it is a d/s thing.

All over the world there are men and women who prefer to either take control or be controlled in the bedroom. They are not into D/s, and they would be appalled at being called a member of the lifestyle.

And what does pain have to do with being sexually submissive? That is just an assumption.

The need to receive pain in a sexual context is masochism, the need to inflict pain in a sexual context is sadism.

The two does not necessarily have anything to do with sexual submission.

but they can and do

 

[Richard49]

Re: Once again i am transfixed...

Jewels and Gold and Silver!
Precious Stones and Pearls on Strings!
Wheeee!

i love decorating my mind,
Blue

I wish I had one left to decorate

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Damn, Shadowsdream...Ya beat Me to it!

but they can and do

They do sometimes, but not always. Just because someone erroneously makes that assumption, that still does not make it true.

The fact is that you do not have to be involved in D/s or BDSM to be sexually submissive.

You can and many are, but not all. That is my point.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

My my I leave to go sleep and lots of messages hehe.

This is going to take me a time to respond to each.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

DRxBlue: hehe awww thats very sweet of you. Thank you! *Smiles*


ebony: labels are just that. Labels. Being called something doesnt make the person. Its who you are that does. A label is just a word. Granted words can be pretty powerful. You can call a beautiful person ugly.. but it wont make it any truer.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

You've hit it on the money! well almost hehe your right about several things. and no hes very sweet and romantic but he can be selfish. No ones perfect eh? And for the first time in my life. I compromize LOL Before it was always my way or no way. Still is. around my house. but not with him. I'm not trying to define myself I am trying to understand him and I better as a relationship. So that I can make it better. I hate being wrong and doubting myself and after the last incident a few days ago. well I keep being refered to come here to ask questions LOL so I have. and we definatelty experiment!! he claims he was taking it easy on me last visit.. I Fear he was LOL He says he wants to do a little more extreme things next time. Now I'm puzzled. Knowing him should be interesting. Told him I was a ltitle worried cause I didnt find the stuff we did in that month so "taking it easy". I dont regret anything and I had alot of fun thought. His answer to my worry is "do you trust me?" of course I do I trust him with my life. and so hes like "no worries then" Should be interesting! lol I know better then asking. And I very much want to get over my shyness I think thats why hes pushing me a little. What I want... Him HERE RIGHT NOW LOL but he lives far away.. I have to wait till this summer *Sighs* I'm SO learning to be patient. I love how he touches me with his big strong hands. mmm hehe that is so him LOL its when he wants to LOL Geez. althought I must say he rubbed himself to the point of tearing just cause I didnt tell him to cum. I so cried.Well I learned something. I lead 99% of the time and I need to not forget to tell him to cum cause he waits LOL at least NOW I know. I've noticed lately I'm the one whos more in charge. if it goes on that way I'll need to talk to him. It could be that hes encouraging me. But yeppers he flipped me over LOL but thats the most tamest incident lol He doesnt want to have my in charge all the time it seems.. He has no problem being the agreesor LOL yumm Which is good for me cause thats not really what I like. well its that I'm shy. its not that I dont want to. I would so love to be able to just grab him and say that he just better fuck me right now. But shyness doesnt just go away. I need to talk to him about that.

Two things, Pixie: Make sure that you are not the only one who needs to make all the changes. It seems as if the language he uses makes it seem like he is trying to change for you - but is that so? As you keep saying you wish he didn't like aggressive women so much. It seems he is projecting his desires on you. I am not saying he is a bad man, as all relationships have issues in one arena or another, but normally it's truly something that takes a bit of change on both parts - compromise, experimentation.

Also, since this is your first sexual relationship I would encourage you not to get too caught up in defining yourself through BDSM, either being Domme or submissive. All people have dominant and submissive traits but the majority of people are not necessarily a hardcore Dominant or submissive. On the other hand, some roleplaying may be helpful in overcoming your shyness, if it appeals to you. But I am thinking back to Shadowdream's comment about babysteps, and not even necessarily into BDSM, but simply in being sexual with someone else. What do you want and like - aside from pleasing him? Or is that the overwhelming desire sexually for you? Is it because that really turns you on or is it because you really aren't sure what to do because of your inexperience? These are mainly rhetorical questions.

The thing is, if he really wants to be a sub, then he can't call the shots too - lol. You have said he is rather domineering in the relationship, and it seems he is also controlling in the roleplaying as well. Even if he wants to give up control sometimes sexually, it is when he wants, without your full knowledge/consent, and is pushed even though it makes you uncomfortable. A submissive would not be allowed to flip his Domme over to take her while she is watching TV.

Sounds like you are both doing a fair amount of exploring and experimenting, and that you care for eachother a great deal. Best wishes to you!

 

[Pixie Mischief]

For the little I know here is my 2 cents on the whole pain deal.. BF seems to like it more then I do lol
didnt see me asking for harder! he wasnt gentle with me with the bitting and pinching! me I Was kinda testing.. I didnt know how hard he liked and stuff.
boy the man bites in usual places!

I agree with ebony... it doesnt excatly have to do with sexual roleplaying. Can but not excatly part of it.

To us.. its forplay LOL

<- doesnt mean little nibbles

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Re: Once again i am transfixed...

*raises eyebrow* you want to bury me?

i hope you sneak into all the treasure troves around here. Pixies are so CUTE when you bury them up to their neck in treasure...

 

[DRxBlue]

Yup! i want to bury you!

Not like 6 feet under! It'd be like being buried in the sand at the beach, but with Emeralds, Diamonds, Rubies, Star Sapphires, Obsidian, Tiger's Eyes, Opals as big as your fist....

The Gold can get a little heavy if you get buried too deep, so stay close to the surface. Let parts of your body poke through the Ocean of Riches.

All encased in a huge chest, as big as a bus, with tufted silk on the inside and Steel Spikes and Black Leather on the outside.

i'll bring along my camera for some photo opportunities, i mean it... you're gonna look CUTE!

i'll resist the urge to make you a green felt hat with a feather.

Do have fun darlin'
Blue

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Re: Yup! i want to bury you!

cute ACK the word always bugged me. I'm no kitten or puppie. you see a kitten and go "Awww soo cute" LOL black leather uh?? wicked I love black

well being buried in all those stones and crystals doesnt sound so bad... hehe But I would think would be quite expensive to accomplish!

Not like 6 feet under! It'd be like being buried in the sand at the beach, but with Emeralds, Diamonds, Rubies, Star Sapphires, Obsidian, Tiger's Eyes, Opals as big as your fist....

The Gold can get a little heavy if you get buried too deep, so stay close to the surface. Let parts of your body poke through the Ocean of Riches.

All encased in a huge chest, as big as a bus, with tufted silk on the inside and Steel Spikes and Black Leather on the outside.

i'll bring along my camera for some photo opportunities, i mean it... you're gonna look CUTE!

i'll resist the urge to make you a green felt hat with a feather.

Do have fun darlin'
Blue

 

[DRxBlue]

Hmmm....

Maybe i should shop around for a Discount Treasure in which to bury you...to look elegant, impish, ritzy, bodacious, curvacious, darling, wistful and radiant.

NEVER cute*gag*

The real treasures are the people who share their lives here. And now you're locked in with all us weirdohs.

i think you'll be safe though.

Blue

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Re: Hmmm....

Maybe i should shop around for a Discount Treasure in which to bury you...to look elegant, impish, ritzy, bodacious, curvacious, darling, wistful and radiant.

NEVER cute*gag*

The real treasures are the people who share their lives here. And now you're locked in with all us weirdohs.

i think you'll be safe though.

Blue

LOL BIG discount hehe

as for weirdos.. lets just say I attrack alot of..unusual people. Probably due to my being disabled. when I was 17 I had this drunk 70 year old or so man.. he was staring at me and not the usual way that people do cause I'm disabled. I Didnt like how he stared at me. he made a motion with his hand (jerkin off motion) and I am petty sure he said "how much sweetheart" but he was so drunk so hard to understand.. But the lady me and mom where with asked us to go for a walk with her and she told us she thought he was trying to preposition me. when 2 people think the same thing.. usualy are right.. he ended up following me and my mother partway hoe.. now THATS a weirdo LOL

 

[DRxBlue]

Yeah...guys like that give weirdohs a bad name...

i like to think of myself as a Gentleman Weirdoh

The kind who wears a tuxedo with engineer boots

Blue

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Re: Yeah...guys like that give weirdohs a bad name...

i like to think of myself as a Gentleman Weirdoh

The kind who wears a tuxedo with engineer boots

Blue

awww hehe

I'm a cool weirdo.. if someone says I'm weird or something I take it as a compliment because it means I'm unique and not one of the sheeps in the sheep crowd. Most people are sheeps. they just go along with all the other sheeps. BAHHHH

 

[NemoAlia]

Pixie, don't listen to Blue. He just wants to give you a pearl necklace.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

Pixie, don't listen to Blue. He just wants to give you a pearl necklace.

yes he wants to bury me in them.. and other jewels LMAO

I must admit I like the idea of having something buried INTO me. but not BEING buried LOL

 

[Ebonyfire]

ebony: labels are just that. Labels. Being called something doesnt make the person. Its who you are that does. A label is just a word. Granted words can be pretty powerful. You can call a beautiful person ugly.. but it wont make it any truer.

I have posted that many times.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

I have posted that many times.

*smiles* Glad you are then.


as he would say "Just because someone calls someone something. Doesnt make it true"

A person may call themself something but it is only a word. Unless they act it and put power behind the word it is meaningless.

 

[Ebonyfire]

*smiles* Glad you are then.


as he would say "Just because someone calls someone something. Doesnt make it true"

A person may call themself something but it is only a word. Unless they act it and put power behind the word it is meaningless.

This is my favorite quote:

"It does not matter what you call me; but what I answer to."

I have been called many things in this forum, in PMs, in the GB, and the Playground. None of it matters one iota. I know what I answer to. No one here can touch Me.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

This is my favorite quote:

"It does not matter what you call me; but what I answer to."

I have been called many things in this forum, in PMs, in the GB, and the Playground. None of it matters one iota. I know what I answer to. No one here can touch Me.

Thats what hes trying to get me to learn. I'm very sensitive and reguarless of the fact I glaim what people say doesnt bother me... it does. He says I need to stop caring about that if I want to move to michigan with him because people are assholes there and I wont make it if I dont start sticking up formyself. Which I am sure is why he pushes my buttons alot.

Saying one thing and doing it are 2 different things. I say it doesnt matter what people think what matters if what I think. But.. it still bothers me.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

<- doesnt want a "pearl necklace"