Play or lifestyle??? I say lifestyle!!

[Beck31]

lifestyle

Everyone's relationship and/or take on it is going to be different. While I crave playtime with my Mistress, I also like strenthening the other bond too. When I first started it was constant play and as time went on a regular relationship also began. For me it is not just about play.

 

[Bette_coquette]

I'm trying to figure out how to turn our relationship into a lifestyle now that we're married. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I'm not big on communication, but for our M/s side of the relationship to flourish, communicate I must.

How does a couple who live together manage this? When my husband and I first started our relationship, it was easy to define our roles. Now that the ink is dry on our marriage certificate, I find I let him act as the Husband while I sit back and act the wife, just like my mother and her mother before her.

Ladies, how do you maintain dominance in a marriage?

 

[desertslave]

I'm trying to figure out how to turn our relationship into a lifestyle now that we're married. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I'm not big on communication, but for our M/s side of the relationship to flourish, communicate I must.

How does a couple who live together manage this? When my husband and I first started our relationship, it was easy to define our roles. Now that the ink is dry on our marriage certificate, I find I let him act as the Husband while I sit back and act the wife, just like my mother and her mother before her.

Ladies, how do you maintain dominance in a marriage?

I'm not a PYL but I have to (respectfully) ask...how did you do it before you were married? Were you living together prior to the ink?

 

[IrisAlthea]

There is more respect and trust in a that lifestyle than in a normal vanilla marriage.

You the sub\slave give 100% over to your Owner\Dom; in return He is obligated to provide and take care of you. The trust of Ownership FAR outweighs the commitment of "vows"

--- horseshit. 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. Another 25 percent probably ought to. And in the "successful D/s relationship that doesn't implode in a public brouhaha within one year" percentage, I'd say about 3.

I've seen as much idiocy perpetrated in the name of "obliged to trust and care for blah blah" and "obliged to obey" as I have in the name of marriage. People are people and their ideals are generally lofty and their execution of those ideals generally a mess.

This.
As for the bolded part, it's one of those things I sometimes wish I'd known earlier and would want to be better at remembering about myself and others.

 

[Miss_Jenni]

i believe that once a sub/master relationship starts is stronger than any marriage vows its more about total commitment of your life to your Master without question

 

[Stella_Omega]

i believe that once a sub/master relationship starts is stronger than any marriage vows its more about total commitment of your life to your Master without question

How long have you been with your master?

 

[Netzach]

I'm trying to figure out how to turn our relationship into a lifestyle now that we're married. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I'm not big on communication, but for our M/s side of the relationship to flourish, communicate I must.

How does a couple who live together manage this? When my husband and I first started our relationship, it was easy to define our roles. Now that the ink is dry on our marriage certificate, I find I let him act as the Husband while I sit back and act the wife, just like my mother and her mother before her.

Ladies, how do you maintain dominance in a marriage?

For me, it's part of burning the list of expectations on the construct "marriage."

Marriage is basically a legal privilege that people with opposite parts are unfairly allowed. Other than that, it's whatever you want it to be.

Let him be the "wife" if that's not really you, you know?

My spouse is TG, so the opportunities to remake the institution are kind of glaringly necessary for me, but I don't think you have to be that far outside the mainstream to take on that point of view, though. Also, no kids and no plans to, so I don't have to apologize to anyone else for making them the school freak.

I am happily the primary earner though we've traded on and off with that - the pants, and the smaller portion of the housework. That's how I roll, and it's being outside the norms enough that allows me to discover that. I still have days that I feel inadequate or off, and I realize that leaving "wife" behind takes a lot of thought.

 

[Kojote]

You people are comical.

They are?
Okay... That had a serious comical quality.
Almost enough to appreciate it...
Almost...

 

[Kojote]

Marriage is basically a legal privilege that people with opposite parts are unfairly allowed. Other than that, it's whatever you want it to be.

For me it's the contract which allows both of us to go to the hospital and get past the counter if something happens.
It's all about the legal stuff which could perfectly be arranged in individual... relationship contracts or whatever.

Apart of that I don’t care for marriage.
I only care for commitment. And when I commit to people I fucking mean it.
Be it adopting somebody very dear to me as a ‘sibling’ or as a partner or whatever.

But I know very well that I am not the usual type of human…

 

[Stella_Omega]

It's all about the legal stuff which could perfectly be arranged in individual... relationship contracts or whatever.

I agree, Marriage is only important to me in legal matters, but for a civil union to be as complete as a marriage takes about five hundred pages of legal contract.

That's a whole lot of arranging taken care of via one legal ceremony.

 

[Kojote]

I agree, Marriage is only important to me in legal matters, but for a civil union to be as complete as a marriage takes about five hundred pages of legal contract.

That's a whole lot of arranging taken care of via one legal ceremony.

That's right.
It's easier over here. At least as far as I know.
In my opinion it shouldn't make a difference which gender or even if the commitment is a classical (read: sexual) one or something based on friednship alone.