Please Leave Your Shoes At the Door and Other Rules

[SpectreT]

The First Rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club.
The Second Rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club!

 

[WriterDom]

cym, I'd suggest you delete your sticky. You can copy and paste what you have there now, and add rules to the beginning once they are hashed out. Then rename it something like The BDSM Forum: Questions and Answers and Rules. And stick it to the top. We don't need anymore cemented stickies in my opinion.

 

[BlondGirl]

And stick it to the top. We don't need anymore cemented stickies in my opinion.

I agree. The three of them there, representing each of our mods is a perfect intro. More would qualify as clutter. Adding to or editing one of those would be best. (The title "Questions and Answers" is perfect, IMO.)

 

[KillerMuffin]

Re: my shoes are at the door and while i was there i polished yours

Rule 2 - Personal information (be it yours or that of someone else) is not permitted. Any and all posts containing any personal information will be deleted.

Rule 3 - Demeaning and/or degrading language will not be tolerated. Any and all posts using demeaning and/or degrading language will be deleted.

Rule 4 - If you do not have an open mind and an open heart you may leave this forum at any time.

Rule 5 - If you've come here to learn, to understand, to question, to laugh, to enjoy the lifestyle that you have chosen we're here for you. However, since we are a society of people who first and foremost trust, respect, and tolerate others if you are disrespectful of us or the lifestyle that we have chosen, consider this fair warning that your posts are subject to deletion.

Rule 2 - You can post your own personal information to your hearts content, you're just not allowed to post someone elses. This is a Literotica-wide rule.

Rule 3 - Demeaning and/or degrading language will be tolerated. This is a Literotica-wide rule. Censorship beyond the Big 3 (spam, personal info, physical threats) is not permitted here.

Rule 4 - This isn't a rule, it's a guideline. However, you should note that responsibility and etiquette cannot be legislated.

Rule 5 - See rule 3. Censorship is not tolerated at this site. If you can say whatever you like the corollary is that so can anyone else. It is, however, completely up to you to respond and encourage trolls or to ignore and watch them slink away.

Personal ads are not deleted, they're moved to the appropriate forum. Threads that break the Big 3 are moved to a Laurel-specific forum for Laurel's perusal. Laurel is the only person allowed to edit or delete posts at Literotica.

Any rules created must conform to the rules that run the entire discussion board.

 

[cymbidia]

One cannot rename threads. I tried with this one.

I thought we would, in fact, have a fourth sticky, one authored by "The BDSM Forum Community" or some such false nick, so newcomers might know from the beginning that we talked it all out and kicked it around, and the guidelines contained therein are community-supported.

I'm not going to delete my intro bit so that this can take its place, WD. I'm willing to add to it, but then we won't have a thread entitled "BDSM Forum Guidelines". You can unsticky your Predator thread, but i'd hate to see that. The info in there is wonderful and necessary. Same for R's stuff.

Either we have a fourth sticky or it's added into an already-stickied thread. Which do all concerned prefer?

Additonally, please keep the rules hashing-out stuff coming. It's looking and sounding really good. I'm very impressed at how much y'all care, and at how much thinking you've done toward maintaining this small bit of Lit and the larger net.

Everyone postiong to this thread has offered stuff of value. Especially noteworthy has been that posted from MissT, BG, petrel, Muffie, and AnonymousSlave. Thank you very much for doing the hard part of this, and for taking it seriously.

T has offered up a good question though. Do we need a "Hello! Welcome! Here's a few local ordinaces..." sort of thread?


Here are the points i'd like some answers to, if you will humor me:
1. Do we need a intro to the BDSM forum thread at all?

If so,
2. Do we have a fourth sticky or do we add it to an already existing sticky with the understanding that there's no title change possible.

If we add it to an already existing sticky,
3. Whose?


Please keep hashing out the rules if that's the direction we think we're going with this, okay? I'll do a consolidation sometime soon.

 

[WriterDom]

2. Do we have a fourth sticky or do we add it to an already existing sticky with the understanding that there's no title change possible.

If we add it to an already existing sticky,
3. Whose?

You can change the title by deleting, but keeping the info.

like this

BDSM blah blah blah


Rules (can be added in the beginning or at the end.)

1. blah blah blah

2. blah blah

Welcome to the Literotica BDSM Talk Forum
Hello and welcome.

This small online community is one in which anyone can ask a BDSM question and have it answered by any one of the many people who pop in and out of here on a more-or-less regular basis.

We have all kinds here: Dom/mes, Switches, subs, everyday life-experienced, seekers after theoretical knowledge, sympathetic nillas, newbies to this lifestyle, couples, singles, Tops, bottoms, masochists, Sadists, and more. At least one of us, probably more, will be able to answer your sincere questions, respond to your concerns, address your issues, and laugh, cry, and rejoice with you as you travel your own BDSM path.

Just to be clear, though, this forum is not an appropriate place to let us know that you don't like what we do with our sexual lives. Each of us has faced enough of that kind of censure already; this is a place to ask questions, get some answers, and talk over some issues.

Here, in our posts and threads, we tend toward acceptance and inclusion of those who come our way, and we possess a broad-minded tolerance for questions and concerns about kinks of all persuasions. There’ll never be much flaming or fighting here if only because most of us have felt the lashing hurt of individual and societal displeasure and fear with regard to our very-private sexuality. Likely you know this already, as a group (however loosely-defined) BDSM’ers tend to be very accepting of individual sexual differences.

This place is all about discussion and thought. We talk over issues and needs and experiences. We compare techniques and suppliers and how to make our own toys. It's sometimes a hard line to hold but we've kept to the high road. One of the methods by which we've decided to further our feeling of community is the decision to disallow personals ads in this Forum. You can ask anything that's BDSM-related, talk about anything at all, no matter how "out there" a fetish it is, but you just can't post your personals ad here.

The BDSM Talk Forum had its genesis in a single thread, one known by a variety of affection nicknames (the Mega, Monster, or Mother thread). It was first posted in July of 2001 in Lit’s How To… forum and grew to 68 pages, 1340 posts, and 31,548 reads by the time we got this spanking (ohhh!) new Forum on February 23, 2002.

It’s still available to anyone who wants to peruse it. We think of it as a gold mine, of sorts. Chronicled in the thread are many months of wonderful BDSM-flavored insights as well as information about many of us, personally, and the manner in which we became the close and supportive community we are today. (http://www.literotica.com/forum/sho...&threadid=39661)

Again, welcome to our community. Thank you in advance for respecting its atmosphere of acceptance, inclusion, and calm discussion.



__________________
BDSM blah blah blah

 

[AnonymousSlave]

as always i'm barefoot, and again i've polished your shoes


WD you crack me up! You write this very well stated, obviously well thought out statement... and you start it and end it with "blah blah blah".

 

[WriterDom]

Re: as always i'm barefoot, and again i've polished your shoes

WD you crack me up! You write this very well stated, obviously well thought out statement... and you start it and end it with "blah blah blah".

The very well stated statement was cyms. I just added the Blahs.

I don't really care how many sticks we have as long as they don't take up the whole first page. cym's sticky seems like a hello and introduction. To me, that's where the rules belong.

 

[morninggirl5]

WD has a great suggestion.

I think the "rules" should be included in the forum info. It would also probably help to put a "Please read" in the title of the sticky.

I don't think we need to have any "rules" other than the usual

1. No spam
2. No personal info
3. No threats
4. Please post personals in the proper forum

Phrasing them as community standards (requirements for belonging) rather than as rules would certainly give a more welcoming tone to newcomers, as well.


As long as we who have been here maintain the sense of community that grew from the beginning, we probably won't have to worry about the flame wars, trolls, etc. If the whole community isn't receptive to them, they will slink away before they stick their whole foot in the door.

 

[petrel]

WD has a great suggestion.

I think the "rules" should be included in the forum info. It would also probably help to put a "Please read" in the title of the sticky.


Phrasing them as community standards (requirements for belonging) rather than as rules would certainly give a more welcoming tone to newcomers, as well.

I agree with the above - and now I really must go to work!!!!

 

[iamaddog]

rules.....

okay...here's my personal to do list from Mistress so far..
being here now full time real life...24/7----
yes yes--leave shoes at front door..#1
coffee must...be on at all times or else--#2
when first greeting another Domme/Mistress, take Her hand, palm down against yours, and place top of Her hand against your forehead as sign of respect--#3
make sure sugar and creamer are always filled--#4

and of course there is the normal expected-to-be...
taking out garbage etc etc...

am I helping any here for you????
I'm trying ...

see ya..
mad dog from iowa in california now....
oh..#5--dump ashtrays for Mistress.....or else!

and don't no one say oh oh please give me or else...!
"I" ..do not...want...wish for..or need..or desire...or else.
uh uh no way jose'--I'm treading on thin ice as a new boy as it is...okee dokee????

thanks folks....
y'all been very very helpful to me so much since I've been here...

garylee...aka mad dog from iowa doing california...

everyone drive careful out there, ok?

 

[RisiaSkye]

Guidelines:
3. Please read all of KillerMuffin's fine stories.
4. Put whatever you want here.

Um, I believe there's been a typo. Number 3 should read: Please read all of RisiaSkye's fine stories.

No thanks necessary; I'm here to help.


Um, if ya'll can't find a place for it, I won't cry if you delete my sticky. I can live without the joy of seeing my name up top every day, and from what I see on the hits, it gets read far less than either of the other stickies. So, maybe someone could just post a link to the longer essay version, tack it onto the end of their new and improved sticky-thread?

Well, someone had to volunteer to be the sacrificial lamb here.

 

[DRxBlue]

Thats really NOBLE of you Risia...<sniff>

But i have a very deep emotional attachment to the SSC sticky. If it weren't for that i wouldn't be here, and my life would be much the poorer for it.

As far as the rules go...i'm inclined to go with KillerMuffin's suggestion that they be set out as "Guidelines".

You could still enforce them in extreme cases, but you could be more flexible depending on context.

i'm still thinking, and watching this thread. This is getting good.

 

[iamaddog]

RisiaSkye..such a fine Lady

aye M'Lady,....twere it be You were absent...would be I myself would not be here also..
I heartily agree with Dr.Xblue!!!!

 

[bluntforcemama]

I think the most important rule should be to respect one another's sexual choices and feelings, no matter how foreign they might be to yourself. This should go both ways, not just for the outsiders looking in.

 

[bluntforcemama]

Rules:

1. No spam
2. No posting of another's personal information
3. No threats
4. No personal ads

Any post breaking this rules will be removed.

Guidelines:

1. Please be nice to each other.
2. We do not discuss the issues and implications of the word 'nilla' on this forum. We realize that outside of the BDSM community it can be construed as insulting, but inside the BDSM community it is part of our jargon.
3. Please read all of KillerMuffin's fine stories.
4. Put whatever you want here.

I like #4.... I tried, but WD moved it.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Confession time!

When I found this forum I was looking for a sincere no crap place to place a personal ad.

I had hoped I had found it. But after reading this thread I took My mind back to the other lists I lurk on and remembered how pathetic and insincere most of the ads were that flooded the mail.

I remembered why I stopped reading most of those lists most of the time. Then I re-evaluated whether I wanted to see this very fine forum become just another dropping ground for trolls and wanna be's.

Yes of course there would still be the sincere mixed in with the drivel but I have seen so many incomprehensible requests that have come to bore Me...that I have decided I am enjoying the conversation more than the fullfillment of My original goal here.

The conversations I have begun to follow are well thought out and realistic looks at BDSM from the inside out and the outside in. What a shame it would be to cloud this bright sky!

 

[MissTaken]

Shadowsdream....

I think that lit as a community is a great place to meet people. You will, for certain, generate interest simply by posting and starting threads....and who knows who's interest will be generated?

Good Luck and enjoy....

The flipness of personals sites is exactly why the "almost" personal ad I placed was so tongue in cheek.

 

[BlondGirl]

The flipness of personals sites is exactly why the "almost" personal ad I placed was so tongue in cheek.

Some of the personals are very serious and very enticing. Mine, of course, is the most exciting one of all!

Shadowsdream, post a link to your ad in your sig line. All the regs and lurkers here will have a chance to be wowed by your thoughts and ideas will then be able to follow up and see what you are looking for in a partner.

 

[NemoAlia]

When I was very new to this forum (although maybe I still am) I didn't know what a troll was. I didn't know how to use the search function, but I knew that if I hadn't read past/other threads on the same subject before posting my own, I'd get in trouble.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think a lot of the breaches of etiquette involve new posters who don't really understand the common language that the experienced posters share. What if we just explained what a troll is and how to use the search function in order to avoid repetitious questions, gave a link to the personals forum, and wrote an official warning about posting personal information?

Well, maybe we do need rules. But if we follow them up with these explanations, we'd be able at least to save people from accidentally missing the mark.

 

[SirRobert]

I'm sure that I qualify for "newbie" status although I am familiar with chat etiquette. I'm looking for an outlet to share my ideas and creativity with other folks of similar mind.

It would be nice to have a rules page with links that give more specific information.

Oh my friends this is soooooo cool. Thanks to all involed in the creation and maintainence of this sight.