Poetry Fun Corner

[UnderYourSpell]

Twilight dunked the sun
below the horizon,
even straining my ears
for that last sound
brought nothing.
Not a tyre squeal
to betray your leaving.
Far away a vixen screamed
for her mate, likewise
my heart, forlorn
forsaken.

 

[butters]

bubblewrap... hmmmmn. thankyou, i think. :blinkz:

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

OK Who needs a new subject and/or urging to finish an old one?

Me, please, if you're up to it.

 

[Magnetron]

OK Who needs a new subject and/or urging to finish an old one?

I haven 't even started my second one.

This is why I never graduated high school.

That and the fact that I was always at the bakery buying donuts during 1st period.

 

[HarryHill]

I haven 't even started my second one.

This is why I never graduated high school.

That and the fact that I was always at the bakery buying donuts during 1st period.

You just need transportation

 

[butters]

You just need transportation

omg - who be drivin' tha short bus?

and is lit playing up for anyone else or has it just got it in for me? soooooo long to load!

 

[HarryHill]

omg - who be drivin' tha short bus?

and is lit playing up for anyone else or has it just got it in for me? soooooo long to load!

Yeah, it's super slow thought it was me. lol I've got one line on my poem, but the glimmer of an idea

 

[butters]

Yeah, it's super slow thought it was me. lol I've got one line on my poem, but the glimmer of an idea

i've not even made a start. just that thought, but there've been others since.
think i'll wash up and hop into bed and switch on the laptop... see if inspiration comes more easily as i recline and imagine drooping grapes hovering near ma lips

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Me, please, if you're up to it.

I am reading a book called The distant hours so that is your title

 

[HarryHill]

Fell asleep with glasses in situ,
watching captions on the tube,
crazy dream scenes played
of commercials quite bizarre
advertising trans-dimensional tools
used on atomic cars, followed by
demonstrations of a name brand molecular rub,
far surpassing Vaseline, administered by a gloved hand
that reached out of the screen, applied the product liberally
then performed a pump and squeeze
Ah... with the usual result
I woke up sticky and wet
thought I saw a yellow gloved hand
retreating to the set
did I just see that?

 

[Magnetron]

You just need transportation

I would have driven that to school myself.

 

[butters]

Fell asleep with glasses in situ,
watching captions on the tube,
crazy dream scenes played
of commercials quite bizarre
advertising trans-dimensional tools
used on atomic cars, followed by
demonstrations of a name brand molecular rub,
far surpassing Vaseline, administered by a gloved hand
that reached out of the screen, applied the product liberally
then performed a pump and squeeze
Ah... with the usual result
I woke up sticky and wet
thought I saw a yellow gloved hand
retreating to the set
did I just see that?

rubber gloves... for hands that do dishes, harry, dishes

I would have driven that to school myself.

i can believe it

 

[butters]

:not a visual representation of me - unfortunately :

dark curls pinned
loosely
atop her head
pink-painted toes extend
caress the shiny bulbous tap
petite foot
slender ankle
sleek calf
wet and rounded as a young otter
a sinuous arm
stretching towards the light
a slow uprising
twinned perfect globes of golden skin
the promise of shadowed tips
of secret valleys
a rising of venus from the waves
a living statue draped in pearling bubbles
details eluding but hinting oh. so. sweetly...

"Cut!
It's a wrap."

 

[HarryHill]

dark curls pinned
loosely
atop her head
pink-painted toes extend
caress the shiny bulbous tap
petite foot
slender ankle
sleek calf
wet and rounded as a young otter
a sinuous arm
stretching towards the light
a slow uprising
twinned perfect globes of golden skin
the promise of shadowed tips
of secret valleys
a rising of venus from the waves
a living statue draped in pearling bubbles
details eluding but hinting oh. so. sweetly...

"Cut!
It's a wrap."

Ah ha ha! nice job, twist on a seeming obvious subject

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Fell asleep with glasses in situ,
watching captions on the tube,
crazy dream scenes played
of commercials quite bizarre
advertising trans-dimensional tools
used on atomic cars, followed by
demonstrations of a name brand molecular rub,
far surpassing Vaseline, administered by a gloved hand
that reached out of the screen, applied the product liberally
then performed a pump and squeeze
Ah... with the usual result
I woke up sticky and wet
thought I saw a yellow gloved hand
retreating to the set
did I just see that?

Oh I say

 

[UnderYourSpell]

dark curls pinned
loosely
atop her head
pink-painted toes extend
caress the shiny bulbous tap
petite foot
slender ankle
sleek calf
wet and rounded as a young otter
a sinuous arm
stretching towards the light
a slow uprising
twinned perfect globes of golden skin
the promise of shadowed tips
of secret valleys
a rising of venus from the waves
a living statue draped in pearling bubbles
details eluding but hinting oh. so. sweetly...

"Cut!
It's a wrap."

Naughty girl ........... should I :caning: or applaud ?

 

[butters]

Naughty girl ........... should I :caning: or applaud ?

neither

i don't do pain and it wasn't great as a poem to be fair - it was messing about with an idea trying to avoid the 'bubblewrap'. i've got a better idea, but it needs to be written properly, if i ever get to it. i want to do it justice, for harry, little fishy that he is

thanks, though, annie - for getting the ideas coming through the brain.

sling us another when you're ready.

 

[Tsotha]

In this harmonious place, this
Garden of Plenty, I come
to choose a gift. The herds
of gazelle part as I walk and
lions lounge in the shade. The
orange tree has five golden globes,
two perfect, purple plums are
on offer within my reach but
the apple tree, oh, the apple
at eye level is so flawless,
irresistible. But, as I reach
out to grasp, an asp unfurls,
hissing wishes, seductive
acceptance and I just had
to pluck it, bring it for you
and here it is. Sink your
teeth into the skin, let the
juice seduce you, my love,
and life will never be the same.

*Chomp, chomp — burp* Got another?

Men — messing up important moments since 10.000 BC.

Seriously, though, there is something quite enticing in the way you've written it.

This was difficult to wrap my head around. There wasn't any way I could find even a glimmer of erotic soooo instead; I have fixated on a sermonish ramble.

The Onion Continuum Theory

So many fragile shells to represent a face
shown to the universe or space
-travellers; be that one man, alien, or god.
So that is the first layer. Religion
or belief - whatever it is named is rigid,
brittle, and ever crumbling to dust
as the pressure of new information shreds
what once shielded faith from harsh truths.

Peel away faith and at last a glimmer
of pungent life escapes in all its fulsome
aroma and wetly gleaming brightness.
Peel and throw this idea to the air
and let faith lift it gently to rest over
teeming humanity; for that is the second
layer and though its presence is obnoxious,
it hides so much richness beneath its feet.

So now, stood in naked glory the fruit
of our world is exposed and ready to accept
the sharp blade of examination and question.
Sow the future in furrows cut with the edge
of plough on this third layer of fertile
earth and abundant potential. Let seedlings
of understanding seethe over a brand new
surface and soon blossom into growth.

Slice through the globe and seek singularity
at the magnetic core. See how every outer
slice expands from that infinity generator
at the centre; and even though hope keeps
us sane in the face of such largeness,
we know that with the curvature of time
and space even this point will vanish.

Up until the third stanza, I thought I knew where you were going. By the end of the third, I was lost. And by the end of the last, I was quirking my eyebrow and wondering whether you're pulling my leg. I have no idea what I just read. Oddly, that's probably how some religions got started.

Fell asleep with glasses in situ,
watching captions on the tube,
crazy dream scenes played
of commercials quite bizarre
advertising trans-dimensional tools
used on atomic cars, followed by
demonstrations of a name brand molecular rub,
far surpassing Vaseline, administered by a gloved hand
that reached out of the screen, applied the product liberally
then performed a pump and squeeze
Ah... with the usual result
I woke up sticky and wet
thought I saw a yellow gloved hand
retreating to the set
did I just see that?

*sigh* ...I wish my dreams were like that.

Twilight dunked the sun
below the horizon,
even straining my ears
for that last sound
brought nothing.
Not a tyre squeal
to betray your leaving.
Far away a vixen screamed
for her mate, likewise
my heart, forlorn
forsaken.

I like the first five lines. I imagined someone straining to hear the hissing of boiling water as the sun sinks into the ocean. Of course, reading on reveals something different, more somber, but still it's beautifully written.

dark curls pinned
loosely
atop her head
pink-painted toes extend
caress the shiny bulbous tap
petite foot
slender ankle
sleek calf
wet and rounded as a young otter
a sinuous arm
stretching towards the light
a slow uprising
twinned perfect globes of golden skin
the promise of shadowed tips
of secret valleys
a rising of venus from the waves
a living statue draped in pearling bubbles
details eluding but hinting oh. so. sweetly...

"Cut!
It's a wrap."

It's a trap?

I like that "oh. so. sweetly..." there. I think it breaks the rhythm nicely, 'cause it's coming pretty fast up until that point, with all those free flowing lines.

 

[HarryHill]

I haven 't even started my second one.

This is why I never graduated high school.

That and the fact that I was always at the bakery buying donuts during 1st period.

What was your subject again? crank up the fluff o matic

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Now I've lost count again ......... I've been away writing eulogies and stuff

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Harry your next subject is 'believing in Extra Terrestials'
Tsotha your next subject is 'walking in the forest'
Butters your next subject is 'Notting Hill Carnival'

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Think I missed Champ off that list , so Champ your next subject is including the line 'they've got a new baby next door'

 

[HarryHill]

Think I missed Champ off that list , so Champ your next subject is including the line 'they've got a new baby next door'

Don't forget Tess, and thanks for mine

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Don't forget Tess, and thanks for mine

Tess has one I believe, and you're welcome

 

[HarryHill]

Think I missed Champ off that list , so Champ your next subject is including the line 'they've got a new baby next door'

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