Questions about submission outside the bedroom

[tythisredheadup]

Re: Different strokes

for different folks.
I find that a 24/7 would be difficult for me let alone a sub. She has a good life, good husband and I believe that a 24/7 would hurt both our lives.
In the past I have found subs to be extremely intelligent, witty and at times smart asses. But in a 24/7 relationship long distance or anything else that doesn't become the case. I want both and I get it when it isn't 24/7
But can anyone tell me, a simple Master, why I like the smartasses??

Fallon, you and I would get along splendidly...

 

[fallon2]

Thank

Thank you kindly, ty!

But in truth it IS hard to find the "right" person who will respect your private life with the family but be able to bring out in you what you desire.

Just as the sub's desires are fulfilled so are the Master's.


Good Luck to all those who are looking and to all those who have found their "one."

 

[Learn Humility]

I find that what my submissive does outside of the bedroom, particularly in public, which demonstrates my ownership of her to be equally as pleasing to me as what she does in the bedroom.

Dressing as a trashy little slut, wearing her collar and leash, or keeping her head bowed while I deal with store clerks and restaurant waiters are like gasoline on my fire.

 

[A Desert Rose]

I think the 24/7 concept can be interpreted in other ways aside from co-habitating.

I can be a 24/7 submissive to my Dom even though we don't happen live in the same house, not to mention, the same city. In a case like this... although it may not be reality to some, it is to us. In my mind, He is be my Dom period, every hour of every day and I know I am His sub in the same fashion. When He calls, when He's in town, when we chat online or on the phone... it's a D/s relationship. And the times we are not in contact, He is still my Dom and I still serve Him and no one else.

 

[mastersproperty]

i am a sub who lives apart from my Master. But psychologically i am his even when we are apart. Outside of the bedroom or in it, i belong to him, everything i do, everything i am is about belonging to him. If he writes to me and asks me to do an assignment, it is outside the bedroom, yet totally erotic for me and totally part of being his submissive. To me there is no such thing as being a submissive only in the bedroom. It is a state of mind at all times. i am his slave and he can summon me whenever he desires and he can ask me to do anything whenever he desires. He knows what i am capable of, what i am not capable of, when to push me just a little, and when to dangle the next thing like a carrot just out of my reach. i think i do not like something and then he withholds it and talks about it first as a punishment and then speaks about it in such a way to make it sound so delicious, so enticing, that the very thing i thought i hated, i am now begging for and i really want it. All of this occurs outside the bedroom, in dialogue, in e-mail, in conversation. But whatever it is, my submission to my Master is there, even when i am working, even when i am making decisions and running the show in my career, even when i am living my life and he is not physically present. My Master is in the background and between my legs and i am aware he can take me whenever he wants. Also, as he has written on this forum, when he takes me out into the world and i am wearing his collar for all the world to see and my head is bowed and he is clearly my Master, this is entirely outside the bedroom. Yet utterly blissful. For me, it is a state of mind, or in reality, a state of being.

 

[MissTaken]

I know it sounds goofy, but I was thinking how the control can reach beyond the sexual/scene aspect and into everyday life. Do any of you experience this? If you do, can you expand on the role this plays in your D/s relationship?

It does reach beyond the bedroom for us as well. There are certain decisions that won't be made without my input or can be "vetoed" by me.

He is quick to care for or serve me whether it is to prepare a cocktail or paint my toe nails.

Conversely, I am constantly aware of him as my friend, lover, soulmate and submissive. I am vigilante of what is happening with him as with us and congnizant of his needs, which include teh control that I provide the relationship.

Neither of us are obsessing on D/s, but by nature of the dynamics and parameters in which we share our bedroom intimacy, we demonstrate our love and respect outside the bedroom.





Welcome to the forum, mastersproperty!

 

[SweetDommes]

Re: Re: Questions about submission outside the bedroom

It does reach beyond the bedroom for us as well. There are certain decisions that won't be made without my input or can be "vetoed" by me.

He is quick to care for or serve me whether it is to prepare a cocktail or paint my toe nails.

Conversely, I am constantly aware of him as my friend, lover, soulmate and submissive. I am vigilante of what is happening with him as with us and congnizant of his needs, which include teh control that I provide the relationship.

Neither of us are obsessing on D/s, but by nature of the dynamics and parameters in which we share our bedroom intimacy, we demonstrate our love and respect outside the bedroom.

While the fact that we are poly puts a different spin on this - we are about like MissT with our boys. We are in charge 24/7 - it may not be overt ... we don't make them go to the store with a leash and ballgag (although both have been threatened, hehehe), but we are in charge. If there is a disagreement, we win unless they can convince us that they are right beyond the shadow of a doubt (no matter what ghosst may say). They do things for us (housework, massages, bathing us, etc) that are not sexual, but are still D/s.

Beyond that, they are our friends, our lovers, and to the outside world, our boyfriends. We do show them respect, we care for them, we care about them - but underneath it all is an undercurrent of who is in charge.

Miss Karen