Running scared

[MastrJ]

The only thing I saw MasterJ post is that he's concerned about this, was hurt by a comment, and seems to be very understanding of just how damn difficult it is to submit and not act out in ways to protect oneself... something I find refreshing, actually.

Thanks Netzach. I appreciate that comment. *blush*


cutedemon commented in her last post about some outside influences. They have really played a large part in influencing everything. Unfortunately I've now let those influences get to me and I lost control of my temper the other night. I didn't mean to and didn't want to, but I scared cutedemon with my temper. So I now find myself in the position of having completely violating my submissive's trust. I don't know if she'll ever be able to trust me again, I hope she can, but I know it's not something that will happen overnight. We've been talking about it and I've apologized over and over for it. Even if she can't ever trust me again, I would like to see her find out more about herself and maybe find happiness in the future with someone else no matter how much that will hurt me in the interim. This isn't my way of saying there's a submissive up for grabs. That's something that she'll have to decide on her own. However I would like to offer thanks to everyone who has offered her advice and help. Please keep it coming if there's more to offer.