Showing arousal.

[Betticus]

My wife and I apologise for bringing discord to this Board. We are old and that is the last thing we wish to do.
In Australia,our generation born between the Wars, was influenced, still, by the English and Irish, whilst the four since by the Americans.
During the past forty-odd years, my wife and I have learned much from Asia, particularly from two cultures, about the Style. Two areas of our interest are, one, how trained women may lubricate only with permission no matter the method and intensity of arousal and, two, how women like to have their males show, whether subs or vanilla..
We correspond with Europeans and South Americans, and came to this Board in order to ask how some Americans think on these matters.
Thank you for reading.

So you are possibly talking about something like the kind of mind/body control that is practiced by some Eastern religions? I also hear that Australian aboriginals, some of the ones that still live outside of much western influence can maintain their body temperatures in extreme conditions a lot like the Tibetan monks can in the snow wearing only light robes overnight.

 

[DeservingBitch]

My wife and I apologise for bringing discord to this Board. We are old and that is the last thing we wish to do.
In Australia,our generation born between the Wars, was influenced, still, by the English and Irish, whilst the four since by the Americans.
During the past forty-odd years, my wife and I have learned much from Asia, particularly from two cultures, about the Style. Two areas of our interest are, one, how trained women may lubricate only with permission no matter the method and intensity of arousal and, two, how women like to have their males show, whether subs or vanilla..
We correspond with Europeans and South Americans, and came to this Board in order to ask how some Americans think on these matters.
Thank you for reading.

I have no idea how to train a woman to lubricate only with permission (nor do I understand why you would want to do it, but that's beside the point).

As for boys, as Netzach said in a previous comment, I could care less about the 'presentation' of a dick that I have no intention of fucking. If however I'm planning on using his equipement to fuck myself with, then it does work better when it's hard.

 

[wrad]

Betticus, to reply to your question regarding the Aborigines, this was a belief handed down by my maternal family who had 10 000 acres further west, on the Central plains of the state, but in our district in the hills at 800 metres above sea level, there is evidence in caves of occupation and fires. There are drawings of people wearing kangaroo skins.
I think the latest belief is that Aborigines may have been able to withstand temperatures of only 2 degrees difference from that of other coloured men.
They were, are, a magnificent people, nomadic, knowing how to live in, and with, a difficult country for 60 000-odd years. In the early days of 'settlement', white men died in the bush where aborigines feasted.

I can offer nothing about Tibetan monks.

 

[snowy ciara]

I don't think you brought any discord really wrad; you're not responsible for all the weirdnesses the rest of us bring to your thread. Thanks for coming back and clarifying your questions.

 

[wrad]

Snowy ciara, thank you very much for your kindness. We did not wish to cause trouble but seek information.

Deserving Bitch, As you will know it is all about the Domme having complete control of her male and/or female and the sub submitting utterly to that control, delighting in his/her submission, experiencing intense pleasure from it but demonstrating that pleasure only when and if permitted by the Domme.

We practise BD with the stress on D, not SM. Pain is used, of course, but rarely passed the point when the sub's pleasure diminishes. Others disagree and rightly so since that is their philosophy.

When a Domme is displaying her female to friends, to have her remain dry even under the most stimulating arousal techniques brings much kudos, do you not think? Then, when given permission, the female floods, opens, engorges, erects, the Domme's complete control is evident.

Yes, many women like to see another female show arousal as the female pleasures them but having complete control is exquisite.

Similarly, with a male. As you write, if you need a quick fuck for pleasure and relief, an hard cock is needed. On other occasions, when the Domme has a couple of hours to be pleasured gently with tongue and finger-tip caresses, many prefer to see the cock fat and not as a 'totem pole', which can
cause some anxiety in many women, domme they may be.

If the male is being displayed to friends, the atmosphere can be less threatening for some women when he is put to caressing their arse-rounds and arse-hole, if he is fat only.

Many women, in the Style or vanilla, like watching a male fuck, like seeing the hard, glistening cock pump, the heavy balls slapping. A surprising, perhaps, number like watching a man fuck a male sub. Having two nude male bodies to watch is good. The high, tight, taut, buttocks and throbbing cock, perhaps the girlish features of the sub being well used , are stimulating as is the maleness of the rider. Muscles and good looks are a bonus.

On the occasions when the Domme is using a couple of males and a female, there can be less tension if the subs show arousal when required only.

Doms and Dommes, generally, use the mind somewhat differently and, being a male, I have not worked it out in total but the depth of a woman's imagination can be awesome. Frequently, they leave us for dead!

 

[FurryFury]

This sounds just a bit much like a fantasy to me.

I've read stories where ladies were given a drug or powder to keep them dry. They were fantasy stories not RL ones. I remember thinking, that's stupid, why would you NOT want her excited and wet?

I've read stories where men had to keep hard ALL the time. Again that was fantasy. I remember thinking, yeah, right.

I don't get it for a RL situation at all.

But each to their own, providing you can make things like this happen. That would seem to be a remote and rare possibility though.

 

[DeservingBitch]

This sounds just a bit much like a fantasy to me.

To me as well.

And while I can get behind the idea of chastety devices on boys, both for the aesthetic and control aspect of it, it does nothing to me with girls. But again, I'm not big on fucking boys, but I'll take pussy anytime!

 

[wrad]

We are sorry it is thought but a fantasy so we shall leave it there.

 

[FurryFury]

We are sorry it is thought but a fantasy so we shall leave it there.

Oh please don't just leave it there if you don't want to.

Talk about it all you want.

You might even educate some of us. You never know.

 

[DeservingBitch]

What she said.

And maybe, explain better what exactly you're looking for. You suggest that this is not only fantasy material to you but something you do in real life. So what is it exactly you were asking with this thread? Tips and advices on how to better control your subs arousal?

 

[unfoundiamond]

allright... all you people too many to name...

Okay... So I should be super careful of every sentence that I write and explain every last detail of what I mean so people cant twist my "I statements" into big proclamations about society or D/s in general...

I was careful to say I before my opinions... Why make what I said about you?? Those where general comments, most of the offense you guys pulled from the words I wrote, came from your assumptions. I didnt write it like that.

Secondly... I love how people who seek acceptance, deny others of the same thing they seek,

Yes, and I didnt say I am being picked on for being 21, I gave that info so maybe my lack of knowledge/expirience with this will make more sence...

Also, WHY WOULD YOU THINK I AM SAYING MALE SUBS ARE LESS WORTHY OF BEING SUBMISSIVE, I said I didnt understand them I never said they wherent worthy... I said I didnt understand it(and i didnt preffer it), and if we are still unclear, HAD I said that male submissives where less worthy, I DID NOT HOWEVER, The sentance would have begun "MALE SUBMISSIVES ARE... " Now, you go back to my writting and find that sentence...

I think everyone is worthy, just as I think I am worthy... I treat others how I would like to be treated... (crusify me with that one, go ahead)

Oh, And when I said the hangy creepy dick comment, that was a I statement too, the reason I found it creepy is there wasnt enought background information in the story for me, the lack of information in the question made it feel generic and the relationship unfarmiliar, thats why i felt it was creepy. Something that just occurred to me, Creepy is a synonym for scarey, and what are people usually scared of? Things they dont UNDERSTAND... makes perfect sence to me...

I can think what I want, and so can you, The only diffrence between me and you is, I will not condemn you for sharing your opinion, or lack of knowledge... all you experts where young and everyone has said something without intending it to be taken the way it may have sounded, why are you acting so holy-er than thou on me...

This site seems to say "free speech, no spam" but aparently no opinions allowed... without getting made to be the bad girl... Its okay, I like being a bad girl...

If i said to you I DONT UNDERSTAND chocolate cake, and that soft hangy chocolate cake over there is creepy and I dont know what to do with it.
DOES THAT SAY TO YOU CHOCOLATE CAKE IS UNWORTHY OF EXISTING?? DOES THAT SAY, I NEVER WANT CHOCOLATE CAKE EVER? NO... I says I dont understand it, maybe Id like the chocolate cake if I had it before... maybe you could explain it to me and I could make a educated opinion about it,


I will be more careful but, I wont be sorry for what I say or have said... Just as I wouldnt expect you to, I believe everyone has a right to their own opinion... we dont have to agree, the only diffrence between us is I wont try to twist your words and read into them.

 

[FurryFury]

Okay... So I should be super careful of every sentence that I write and explain every last detail of what I mean so people cant twist my "I statements" into big proclamations about society or D/s in general...

I was careful to say I before my opinions... Why make what I said about you?? Those where general comments, most of the offense you guys pulled from the words I wrote, came from your assumptions. I didnt write it like that.

Secondly... I love how people who seek acceptance, deny others of the same thing they seek,

Yes, and I didnt say I am being picked on for being 21, I gave that info so maybe my lack of knowledge/expirience with this will make more sence...

Also, WHY WOULD YOU THINK I AM SAYING MALE SUBS ARE LESS WORTHY OF BEING SUBMISSIVE, I said I didnt understand them I never said they wherent worthy... I said I didnt understand it(and i didnt preffer it), and if we are still unclear, HAD I said that male submissives where less worthy, I DID NOT HOWEVER, The sentance would have begun "MALE SUBMISSIVES ARE... " Now, you go back to my writting and find that sentence...

I think everyone is worthy, just as I think I am worthy... I treat others how I would like to be treated... (crusify me with that one, go ahead)

Oh, And when I said the hangy creepy dick comment, that was a I statement too, the reason I found it creepy is there wasnt enought background information in the story for me, the lack of information in the question made it feel generic and the relationship unfarmiliar, thats why i felt it was creepy. Something that just occurred to me, Creepy is a synonym for scarey, and what are people usually scared of? Things they dont UNDERSTAND... makes perfect sence to me...

I can think what I want, and so can you, The only diffrence between me and you is, I will not condemn you for sharing your opinion, or lack of knowledge... all you experts where young and everyone has said something without intending it to be taken the way it may have sounded, why are you acting so holy-er than thou on me...

This site seems to say "free speech, no spam" but aparently no opinions allowed... without getting made to be the bad girl... Its okay, I like being a bad girl...

If i said to you I DONT UNDERSTAND chocolate cake, and that soft hangy chocolate cake over there is creepy and I dont know what to do with it.
DOES THAT SAY TO YOU CHOCOLATE CAKE IS UNWORTHY OF EXISTING?? DOES THAT SAY, I NEVER WANT CHOCOLATE CAKE EVER? NO... I says I dont understand it, maybe Id like the chocolate cake if I had it before... maybe you could explain it to me and I could make a educated opinion about it,


I will be more careful but, I wont be sorry for what I say or have said... Just as I wouldnt expect you to, I believe everyone has a right to their own opinion... we dont have to agree, the only diffrence between us is I wont try to twist your words and read into them.

GREAT POST!

 

[Netzach]

You can say any damn thing you please, just as I have a right to say "hey what you said is insulting and here's why." Saying "I just believe that gay people are the devil" for example doesn't mean that I have to say "oh that's just her opinion and she's entitled." It is, and you are. I also get to weigh in on it.

That's not shutting you down, it's just not agreeing. Sorry. That's how this free speech thing works. You can either decide everyone's picking on you or take what you want and leave the rest from the disagreement.

One thing I don't get - how is dick less gross and creepy attached to Dom man than sub man? I tend to find it either just there or kind of ridiculous myself, even attached to my loved ones, just what I've got to work with.

 

[_kiana_]

I was careful to say I before my opinions...

There will always be people online who take things differently than you expected. It's the fact that there is no tone of voice or body language to be interpreted. And there will always be someone who thinks you are trying to say your opinion is the only right one.

The only diffrence between me and you is, I will not condemn you for sharing your opinion, or lack of knowledge... all you experts where young and everyone has said something without intending it to be taken the way it may have sounded, why are you acting so holy-er than thou on me...

Personally, I was sincerely trying not to be holier-than-thou or trying to 'condemn' you. I was actually trying to tell you that I have felt pretty much the same way toward male submissives as you do, that you're not alone in feeling that way, but that it is in your best interest to try to state things in a 'politically correct' or at least polite way. Strong words that evoke emotional responses are best left out as they bring out the defensive in people.

I've had to learn how to communicate on the internet. I used to quite often get the same responses as you are getting now. It led to me being not allowed to contribute at all on any kind of forum for a long time. I had to learn to write with my head instead of my heart.

---

Sorry for the hijacking wrad.

 

[Homburg]

One thing I don't get - how is dick less gross and creepy attached to Dom man than sub man? I tend to find it either just there or kind of ridiculous myself, even attached to my loved ones, just what I've got to work with.

Easy.

submaledick says "please crush this pitiful worm"

You can't hear what DomMaleDick is saying because the trumpets and angels singing its' praises are too loud.

Nuff said.

 

[Netzach]

Easy.

submaledick says "please crush this pitiful worm"

It can, and that can be fun.

It can also say "tie me up, this turgid sausage is YOUR personal sybian, yee ha."

 

[FurryFury]

It can, and that can be fun.

It can also say "tie me up, this turgid sausage is YOUR personal sybian, yee ha."

(and it's TONS cheaper too!)

 

[unfoundiamond]

I was only trying to clarify...

Nezatch, that was my whole point, and I should have made this point diffrently, I thought it was creepy because the question didn't establish the relationship as being with the "my loved ones", I said before the question sounded generic and unfarmiliar, and that was what I ment. You said it better, If the soft hangy penis belonged to my loved one I'd love it, also... I totally in agreement. I don't know how saying I don't understand something and saying something is wrong can be compared? What I said shouldn't be compared to hatred, I don't hate male subs, I don't understand them, I am with a completely alpha male type, and I just don't have a frame of reffrence... not even saying I wouldn't want a male sub, only from what I have recently read in the "ok you male subs" post, it does sound interesting... I didn't post a link to not distract from the post.

Kiana, I have learned a lesson from you and all who replied... I will be more careful. And though I said I am not sorry for what I said (since I didn't say anything with malicious intentions) I am sorry for sounding so wrong... I am sorry if I offended someone unintentionally...

I can only say I hope this missundertanding doesn't cause you to hate me... I seem to have put some on the defensive when I was clarifying my statement.

Thank you for the discourse. I should have just asked for more clarification.... I am sorry wrad...

Ill go ahead and bow out...

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Netzach]

Wrad no offense taken here... I was more confused as to how one would go about preventing a woman from natrally lubricating...

I kind of understand how male submissives can be trained to control their erections; however, I've not heard of the equivilant being done with female submissives... although I suppose if you can be trained to climax on demand, it's not that much of a stretch?

I don't question why do it - the sensations of penetration are different depending on the state of lubrication, so I can see why one might occasionally prefer one over the other, but I'm a bit lost as to how one would go about accomplishing such a thing...


(sincere and curious question ahead)

Speaking from a physiological standpoint a woman is always "wet" to a certain degree; particularly during ovulation, a woman is going to be "wet" due to physical changes to her body *over which she has no control*. There is a period of 4 - 7 days in her cycle where she's going to produce [slippery, raw egg white like] fluids, stimulated or not. It is a natural bodily function and byproduct of ovulation.

I understand creating a stimulus for arousal (for example, I can't help but get "wet" when around early books), but I'm curious how one controls such a thing dring those times when biology contradicts it?

My pussy doesn't work that way, I don't really expect my girls' to. I suppose it could be done with long term training, but I'm personally more interested in getting my boots perfectly polished, or my nails done like a pro did them, or having my name on a just-published book dedication, all things which would require that kind of time, which, as we know, is finite.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[Homburg]

It can, and that can be fun.

It can also say "tie me up, this turgid sausage is YOUR personal sybian, yee ha."

Turgid is one of my favourite words.

And I will point out that I made both images equally silly. The penis is inherently a silly looking thing IMO.

 

[Netzach]

Turgid is one of my favourite words.

And I will point out that I made both images equally silly. The penis is inherently a silly looking thing IMO.

Oh I laughed. And I'm with you. Doesn't mean I can't have a good time with it, but it does not inspire reverence.

 

[Homburg]

Oh I laughed. And I'm with you. Doesn't mean I can't have a good time with it, but it does not inspire reverence.

*shrug* For some people, it does inspire reverence.

We love those people.

 

[Netzach]

Haha, yeah. I mean in the generic. It's gotta be attached to something good, to me, anyway.