Sleeping on the Wing Challenge: Frank O'Hara (1926-1966)

[Liar]

Weird. This was way harder than the first two challenges. And I kinda like O'Hara, the way he can wedge in little pieces of bizarro world into the constant flow of concrete and mundane, so that you have to go back and read it again to realize you've been had.

I don't even mind the constant namedropping and narrow reference frame. I don't recognize half of it, but it provides flair anyway.

Gonna take another stab at it tonight. We'll see...

 

[UnderYourSpell]

He Laments

Your books have always been some kind
of enigma to me,
sitting in some cold corner with the heating off,
at least have the sense to put on something
warmer than a pair of woollen socks.
Immersed in Carlos Ruiz Zafon,
translated version of course!
The number one bestseller? Says who?
While you hunch one shoulder that clearly says
don't bother me now,
why can't I talk to you like books, like some
over rated Spanish plot now filling your head?

 

[normal jean]

Weird. This was way harder than the first two challenges. And I kinda like O'Hara, the way he can wedge in little pieces of bizarro world into the constant flow of concrete and mundane, so that you have to go back and read it again to realize you've been had.

I don't even mind the constant namedropping and narrow reference frame. I don't recognize half of it, but it provides flair anyway.

Gonna take another stab at it tonight. We'll see...

I am in total agreement with Liar on this one, Sis. But the challenge is what makes it fun, right? I got a real kick out of whoever said he was an emotional poet, Pat said that about me, but I have no problem writing on the philosophical or metaphysical subject now and then. Such a great idea for a challenge, I feel like I am in school again, only better.

 

[normal jean]

The Lament of ( living with) a Lazy Poet

It is not so hard, a friend of mine
once prodded, just pick up a pen
and write.

What do you know of this, you are
a slob, in every sense. Your shoes
lying by the door is proof, and what

shall I see if I enter your kitchen
space? A smorgasbord of revelry
from the night before? And who

may I presume, consumed the peaches
I purchased for dessert, oh what
will Carlos think of me? I have nothing

not even a paltry plum to offer now.
I am certain I shall perish from this
place without so much as a mention

in this week's society page. Damn you!
I have no inhibitions, when it comes
down to the writing, but where you

are concerned, I have decided, I am
resigned to be your chambermaid
and for this, I promise, in your next life

You shall be severely punished.

 

[Angeline]

It is not so hard, a friend of mine
once prodded, just pick up a pen
and write.

What do you know of this, you are
a slob, in every sense. Your shoes
lying by the door is proof, and what

shall I see if I enter your kitchen
space? A smorgasbord of revelry
from the night before? And who

may I presume, consumed the peaches
I purchased for dessert, oh what
will Carlos think of me? I have nothing

not even a paltry plum to offer now.
I am certain I shall perish from this
place without so much as a mention

in this week's society page. Damn you!
I have no inhibitions, when it comes
down to the writing, but where you

are concerned, I have decided, I am
resigned to be your chambermaid
and for this, I promise, in your next life

You shall be severely punished.

Was this intentional? Made me think of William Carlos Williams' Plums, and is great. Ok, great if not, too.

 

[normal jean]

Was this intentional? Made me think of William Carlos Williams' Plums, and is great. Ok, great if not, too.

yeah sweetie It was intentional. I was trying to do what O'hara did, only on a smaller scale, with the 'name dropping and such.

i hope you know how much it means to me, that you like my work Ange, it is so very gratifying to get a nod from someone as talented as you are.

hugs

 

[Liar]

Heh, I have no idea where this took me. (The Trabant took me to a train station, but that's another story.)


While Waiting for a White Trabant

Ten to midnight on a laser brain day,
east of the wall (possibly, probably) but surely
somewhere between Brandenburger Tor and
forever,

i popped another mint and hummed along
to Snoop Dogg oozing from a third story
cracked frame in this coal charred Stalin's
Stonehedge, and the cracks in the pavement
leered a tar and pebble grin up at me.

"Now, there's something to write a poem
about," it croaked, "Russia rots like
gangrene, and America spreads like smallpox,
where's your pen, man, where's your paper?"

"What's there to write," I hissed
into the back of my teeth, behind rigid lips,
because pavement speaks to me and me alone,
and who knows what Polizei do to random
loiteres who talks to themselves? "now
that you've already said it all?"

It spoke no more, but I could feel both
discontent and petty pride under each step,
together with the slight trembles of pent up
wanderlust that any road will radiate which
only runs around the block.

Five to midnight the music died, the
voltage hum crackled and dissapeared
and every window went black.

And I was left with the hollow obelisks
edging closer, a faint St Elmo's Fire
stretching between the roofs and very
old, very angry words rushing in to fill
every last pocket of silence with
an even deeper one.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Well I was starting to write another one but I know it could never be as good as that

 

[normal jean]

Well I was starting to write another one but I know it could never be as good as that

wow, hun, dont be like that! If we all thought like that, well, I know I for one wouldnt have written a single thing since day one when I was invited here!

I know I dont really say much, and I have a sorry attitude sometimes, I am easily wounded cause kids called me ugly when I was in the third grade because I have a chicken pox scar on my forehead, anyway, thats nothing, lol....and I have an awful stupid temper, I dont hump enough people to be fawned over, and, I dont have a frigging college degree ( and I only mention that now because you might wonder who it mattered to in the first place, I got some shitty anon feedback that really hurt when I first joined and thanks to some really awesome people here, ( ange and Pat and eve and anna) I realized that is NOT what makes a poet, some of the worst poetry I have read here was written by people who claimed to have an MFA....but hell I know a poet with potential when I see one and babe, you are one!! You have oodles and gads of poetential, not to mention you are sweet as molasses and really, like totally cute

And if you stop writing, I will track you down and spank you

okay? please, ya know, I have really been enjoying your work sweetie ( and I am pretty sure I am not the only one) and one thing people here that have been here as long as me, and I joined in 2002 ( my original Lit name is/was Maria 2394) and, I joined on Valentines day, now that is pathetic

I know maybe I am not respected as a poet that you would judge your work by, BUT, I dont really suck at it either... but you see? that is the problem, you, or any of us, for that matter, shouldnt judge your work by what others write. we all have a unique voice and yours is sweet ans a birdy call....just know this, YOU are a good writer on your way to being better and better with every line you write....

 

[Liar]

And if you stop writing, I will track you down and spank you

And I'll help.

Besides, you've already churned out a top notch poem in this thread. So what's stopping you from doing it again?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I don't know what to say and I have gone all weepy ....... oh it's just me and things from the past and all that shit I still get this not good enough thing ...... when you are told often enough as a child it kind of clings to you but I thank you both from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to bolster me up you will never know how much it means to me

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Don't let that stop the spanking tho

 

[Angeline]

I don't know what to say and I have gone all weepy ....... oh it's just me and things from the past and all that shit I still get this not good enough thing ...... when you are told often enough as a child it kind of clings to you but I thank you both from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to bolster me up you will never know how much it means to me

Doesn't everyone get that as a child? I did. My dad especially was really hard on me about learning--if I got a "B," it should have been an "A." If an "A," it should have been an "A+." I really tried not to get into this with my kids though I wanted them to meet the highest standards they could.

Remember when you came here and I said you were good? I read those first poems you submitted (showed you how to submit em, I believe), and I thought "what a lovely way she has of putting things." And I love the way you write about nature, so observant of the tiniest details.

I don't want to push anyone (I guess I'll leave the spankings to NJ and Liar lol), but please don't hesitate to post because you think you might not be "good enough." Everyone here has good days and days when they write clunkers. And we all know it, too. So just write what you feel and share the love.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I've still got it saved I will go back to it and thankyou xxx

 

[Eluard]

Great stuff NJ and UYS and Liar!

(You remind me, Liar, that I have a backlog of wandering in East Germany poems to get out! Great poem!)

 

[normal jean]

I don't know what to say and I have gone all weepy ....... oh it's just me and things from the past and all that shit I still get this not good enough thing ...... when you are told often enough as a child it kind of clings to you but I thank you both from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to bolster me up you will never know how much it means to me

oh Honey

there's some really good hearted people here. I would say a couple of them probably saved my life... and I mean that literally. I'm the resident kook

if you ever wanna talk, just let me know, i have a good and strong lady-construction-worker- shoulder you can cry on if you ever need to, k?

and as Liar said-- get to churning out them poems, you're a delightful, talented spirit to have around.

 

[normal jean]

.... m

 

[normal jean]

Great stuff NJ and UYS and Liar!

(You remind me, Liar, that I have a backlog of wandering in East Germany poems to get out! Great poem!)

Dear Eluard

just wanted you to know, I have been enjoying your additions to the challenge(s) as well. Thank you for the encouragement.

 

[Angeline]

Bye bye tomorrow

I'll be sorry to say goodbye (and unstick) Frank tomorrow. He elicited wonderful poetry from the participants. He got one of my better efforts, I know.

But move aside for the next poet, he must. I don't know who it'll be yet. I haven't looked at the book since last Sunday.

Frank will be around, albeit unstuck, if you want to read the poems or write in the thread.