Spirit song: the elven wanderer finally has a home.

[The_gladiator]

he nodded, "Yes. the men around here often seem to want to turn that two letter word into a three letter one... Though I am not a woman I have seen women that post lots here, I think they must get used to telling people to fuck off." here he chuckles.

"No I am not nearly that rude. And though despite my recent posts appearing very introspective this has somewhat become my journal, I do enjoy company, I always have. I am honestly surprised that someone new found me here. If anyone posted after a post like I made I expected perhaps an old friend or two, though I did not really share to draw people in so much as just a way to share a piece of me. This thread is probably the place I am most vulnerable and open on lit. I don't maintain a blog and so sometimes I post here to chronical my pain I suppose." he shrugs.

 

[sweetheart97]

"It does get old after a while. But, every once in a while you get to meet someone delightful." She smiled at him, stared at his ears for a second, then looked at her hands in her lap.


"I can identify with pain. I feel it so often that it seems like that's all there is sometimes. I don't want to live in a world of pain for however long I'm supposed to. I try to help where I can even though - Spoiler alert - I have no clue what I'm doing. So, seeing something like what you posted, it makes me want to help, even if all I do is sit and chatter for a bit." She looked out at the water, fidgeting with a loose thread on her skirt.

 

[The_gladiator]

"Sometimes that's all you can really do," he said softly. "People like me just don't like being alone. There really aren't words that can make something like death better, just letting others know we're there is about all we can do."

he nodded, "I feel the same thing about the depression and anxiety I deal with, sometimes unsure how I can go on with that pain for the rest of my life, but yet I soldier on. Listen to me don't I sound morbid," he said and fidgeted with his hands in his own lap.

He seemed like he wanted to reach out to her, but so many didn't casually touch as he did, so many took it as more than he meant it.

 

[sweetheart97]

"People like you?" Yup, still focused on the elf thing. Reminding herself gently not to be specist, she frowned and shook her head. "People don't like to be alone, but so many have no clue what to do here they don't try."

She smiled and rolled her eyes. "You don't sound morbid. I'd normally say you sound human, but, um..." She glanced at his ears. Don't say it. It's just better to not say it. She leaned against him, almost suddenly but not so suddenly that she'd hurt him.

"I think that sort of pain is more universal than anyone wants to admit," she said.

 

[The_gladiator]

he smiled at her question, "Extroverts. is what I meant by people like me.."


"Oh I am not necessarily lonely here on lit, I am quite active and have not had too much trouble connecting with people over the years. It is the real world where I struggle with that.

As she leaned against him he smiled and did not shy away from the touch, his hand laying atop hers again.

"As for me sounding human. you know, the writer is human as it were. and though this façade be that of an elf, there is a real person behind the image. This place is a delicate balance of reality and fantasy for me."

 

[sweetheart97]

If she hadn't been leaning against him, she would have facepalmed. As it was, her face did turn quite pink. "Sorry..I haven't seen many elves. I...I'm an idiot."

She didn't pull her hand away, but over the next few minutes she relaxed against him a bit. "I know that feeling. It's easy to do once, but to make and keep meaningful connection? Pretty difficult."

"True. I know it's a façade. Our fantasies are important. The real world can be a bit much."

 

[The_gladiator]

He lifted his free hand to brush her cheek, feeling the heat. He said nothing, that simple touch acknowledging her blush and hoping it conveyed that it was not needed.

he let his thumb trace over the back of her hand.

"Yeah it's hard when you do make connections and people seem to leave." he shrugged.

"For sure, fantasies are important. There are things I can be here I cannot in the real world. Things that I can let out or not by choice, where in the real world I do not have that option."

 

[sweetheart97]

She closed her eyes as he brushed her cheek. She opened them again before his hand left her face. The thumb on the back of her hand felt comforting.

"The internet and lit are like that, I suppose." She watched him, one eye closed as she looked up from his shoulder.

"Then I shall do my best to respect the balance of this place," she smiled at him.

 

[The_gladiator]

"It's the one place in the world I can not be disabled and people don't see that first," his voice was low, almost a whisper. He wasn't even sure he should say that, but yet he did. he almost shrugged, but it would push her away, and he didn't want that.

his hand began to explore hers, so much smaller than his, he had always loved hands, so much comfort in touch.

 

[sweetheart97]

"It's certainly not what I first saw." She smiled at him. "You did whisper, but you're close to my ear." She stiffened when he began to explore hers, but relaxed as it did. She watched, his hand dwarfed hers.

 

[The_gladiator]

When she stiffened he almost pulled away. "Sorry, I shouldn't do that."

His eyes moved away from her out to the water. "I created this home not too long ago letting my previous home on the PG die as it had too much information about my real world in it. I just don't want to have that anymore as I said this is my chance to escape that."

 

[sweetheart97]

"It's ok, I'm just extra jumpy sometimes." She told him, offering her hand again.

She let the hand drop into her own lap. "Well, I promise to respect your home. It's beautiful, and I'm certainly not going to mess that up."

 

[The_gladiator]

he took her hand in his this time lacing fingers with her. Just needing the contact. "Thank you," he whispered finally.

"Yes my home is beautiful," he said louder smiling as he looked around. "I am not even sure I have explored all it has to offer truly."

 

[sweetheart97]

She let him take her hand back, it was her fault he had let go, and looked out at the water. She was a little confused when he thanked her, but smiled. "Of course."

She nodded. "I just walk around here sometimes. You probably know more than me at least, being that it is your home."

 

[The_gladiator]

"Yes, and I often go down to the ocean as well. It is another place of peace for me." he gave her hand a squeeze. He had thanked her for the contact.

"Walking is good, so is swimming for me."

 

[sweetheart97]

"It's pretty to look at, but I haven't gone swimming in it." She looked out at the water and tried to not think about anything poky that would be hiding beneath the waves, or any of the many scary types of fish. A deep breath slowed her heart rate somewhat.

 

[The_gladiator]

"Maybe you'll go swimming with me sometime," he said with a quick grin.

"So are you a writer?" he asked finally.

 

[sweetheart97]

"Maybe...just not out there." She gestured with her head towards the ocean. She blushed a bit at the grin.

The other question caught her off guard. "Me? I mean, I dabble but I don't know if I would call it serious writing. You?"

 

[The_gladiator]

“Yes,” he said stroking his thumb along her hand again. “I haven’t published but I write enough here that yes, I’d probably be called a writer.”

 

[sweetheart97]

She calmed as he stroked her hand, soothed by the motion. "I'm not published either, but here, I'd get called a writer. Not that I'd mind."

 

[The_gladiator]

"I would like to publish and have some ideas, but I don't like writing on my own much I prefer a partner."

he gave her hand a squeeze. "I have one writing partner now that we have started something like a test novel in google docs, testing to see if we could really write a novel together we might be able to."

"Two different people asked me to srp today, surprised me. apparently someone likes my work.

 

[sweetheart97]

"Your work is good. In my opinion anyway. Plus, sharing the side characters is a good idea. Breaks up the development. An idea you have might be on pointe for a character, whereas I might screw that vision up." She shrugged, then nudged him gently.

"It's just your lucky day. Your SRP is that compelling." She told him, smiling.

 

[The_gladiator]

he smiled at her, "Yeah I've always found that sharing npcs is useful depending on the story. It also allows for further interaction so you can have more player interaction if one pc and an npc are interacting if it's not my player character I would gravitate to write the non player character in that moment."

"It is my lucky day in that I've not been alone, people have reached out through so many different means today. I was so afraid I'd be alone."

 

[sweetheart97]

"Well, you're not alone. And you're definitely wanted. Those who have reached out should show you that." It was her turn to attempt to push the swing, and after a series of slightly comical mishaps, she just pushed the swing by way of the side.

 

[The_gladiator]

He watched her and smiled extending down his leg to push them, not realizing he'd let them stop. "Thank you for your kind words. That's how I have felt today yes." he smiled, "Even by you though we've just met you have made me feel less alone, that's a gift."