Story feedback

[CAT~~]

Kerri,
Thanks for the input and I think the reason that the Crush ended up in present tense was because it had been on my mind all day. I ended up writing the whole thing straight through that same day. I think that might have a lot with why it came out it present tense...well, most of it did any way...grin.

 

[bluntforcemama]

My favorite stories are: Hostile TakeOver series by WhisperSecret, and the Surrender series by D'Artangan (gosh I hope I spelled that right this time.... darn musketeers! ) Those stories are printed and in my "personal" drawer at home along with my unmentionables...

 

[CAT~~]

Yeah, I must admit that Hostile Takeover was one of my favorites too. Hoping to be able to write like that one day.

 

[NCmVoyeur]

2nd Person POV

I posted the following in response to another writer's request for feedback. But since this thread seems to be something of a 'second person POV' forum, I'll toss my 2 cents in once more:

My objection to second person POV is that it's a restricted voice used within a story intended for general reading. I find that confusing and annoying. SP POV (in the 'real world') is normally reserved for letters, which are not intended for general viewing. I can't think of a single book or short story I've read (outside of 'erotica') that uses SP POV. To read a story in the second person leaves me with an awkward choice. Either I assume i am the 'you' of the story (in which case the author usually does a poor job of describing me) or I assume I am not (in which case I feel excluded).

Use of second person POV also seems to compel another feature I dislike: lack of character development. The intimacy of the 'you' form assumes the author and the second person already know each other well. Character development becomes superfluous.

 

[Andra_Jenny]

Geez Laurel,
If I make the effort to clean up my spelling, then I'll start checking the grammer. then the content, re-examine the question, and probably decide I was better off not posting. The how would I ever catch up to the niteliter