Strangest Thing You've Ever Cum On (or spot/place/object/body-part)

[sunandshadow]

Man, now I want to see a photo of someone shooting a load at a pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey poster.

 

[dSpiral]

A wedding photo. Not mine.

Short version.

In my late teens my Girlfriend leaves me for an older guy.
I start sleeping with her divorced mother.
After about six months, while giving oral, the mother asks me to cum on the wedding photo of her and her ex.
When I’m about to cum she pulls me out and finishes me off onto the picture. First couple of shots go on the picture then she takes me back into her mouth and sucks the rest out and dribbles it onto the photo.

After that I started thinking with the head on my shoulders for a change and ended the relationship.

 

[kodos9000]

Well the list is long, haha I guess the strangest thing was all over my friends sisters panties. I ended up telling her later and we dated for a short time!

Place: in the showers of a local pool, anyone could have walked in, no one did though.

 

[SweetGasps]

I like to wear my come behind my ears, rather than using perfume. I get a certain thrill riding in elevators. In such an enclosed space men can't help reacting to the smell without knowing what it is. Their eyes dilate, and they start to breathe heavily through their noses smelling something familiar that they can't quite place. I rather enjoy the confusion it causes.

This I will have to try. Thank you for the brilliant idea! I would love to try it at work, if I didn't work around so many women. Although....

 

[longslowlicks]

Freshly made bowl of ramen noodles so that I could eat it or in a urinal in the movie theater restroom. I'm going to keep thinking though, I know there have to be more.

 

[just4friends]

and?

I like to wear my come behind my ears, rather than using perfume. I get a certain thrill riding in elevators. In such an enclosed space men can't help reacting to the smell without knowing what it is. Their eyes dilate, and they start to breathe heavily through their noses smelling something familiar that they can't quite place. I rather enjoy the confusion it causes.
On occasion I have coated a lovers cutlery before setting the table. It always seems to lead to such an interesting evening.

If on said elevator, someone comments on your wonderful scent? How do you reply?

Making note... to start with kissing behind your ears as an appetizer, not that we'd ever meet, but one needs to be prepared for all possibilities.

 

[Biker_Type]

Primavera (Allegory of Spring) by Sandro Botticelli, when i was a freshman in HS. it was in a research room of the school library and, what the hell, i was 14 and had no self control.

 

[ketrell]

With my ex, she was squeamish about giving head, but one time decided she wanted to taste my cum. She gave me a fast brutal handjob with her bath lotion and I was on the verge of a massive orgasm. She made me hold it in while she cleaned the lotion off my head, but told me if I came before she was ready, she wouldn't give me head. It took every ounce of will power, which was even worse when she was cleaning the head. Then she wrapped her lips around the head and told me to cum. She choked down the first spurt, but very expertly drained the rest.

Knowing she'd never given head before (at least she claimed not to) and that I had been the second man to ever see her naked, I asked her where she learned that. She told me her co worker had taught her with a corndog while at work the night before. Her co-worker was a hot slutty chick that teased me ruthlessly and always joked about having a threesome. But the thought of her teaching my girlfriend how to pleasure me made me cum a second time.

 

[HardHornyDad]

There was a college aged daughter next door...her parents regularly invited us to parties. One night while everyone else was out back participating, I went in, found the drawer she kept her panties, swimsuits and bras in and jacked all over the contents 3 times during the course of the night.

 

[soccergurl7]

these stories are awesome. keep them cumming.

 

[HardHornyDad]

Oh! Wait! there was the time about a million years ago, I was in a sorority house, couldn't help myself, I took all the toothbrushes in the bathroom, put them in the sink, and I sprayed my cum all over them!

 

[Trimjob69]

Oh! Wait! there was the time about a million years ago, I was in a sorority house, couldn't help myself, I took all the toothbrushes in the bathroom, put them in the sink, and I sprayed my cum all over them!

You're naughty

 

[HardHornyDad]

You're naughty

*taking a bow*
Thank you very much

 

[mwmbham]

In my mom panties when I was staying at home alone.

 

[thundergod66]

i went to my friends house to feed the dogs nobody was home at the time and went into there bathroom and found a pair of his wifes panties so i took them home and had the most intense jerkoff session ever,still jerkoff in them panties till this day..

 

[thundergod66]

ohhhh also forgot.one time at work i went to get some lunch my cousin worked at the same place i did,,went to order her chicken fried steak and going back to work i stoped by local store used the bathroom to jerk off and added my cum on the gravy for her chicken fried steak..was hot know she was eating my cummm