Swingers

[LMWM321]

The way she describes it is he just wasn't anything close to resembling her type and she just felt no real attraction at all. However she agreed because she didn't want to be the party pooper for everyone else, albeit reluctantly. What resulted to her surprise according to her was the best sex she'd ever had bar none and far beyond anything she'd expected.

Wow, that surprises me.. Sexual activity feels good when you're attracted to someone, if not... it feels like an invasion of your space and body.

Could it be the mojo between them changed once they were alone? Maybe his vibe and charm improved before the sex began... If not, I can't fathom commencing sex with someone who turns you off. Blechhh... Enjoyable sex happens because of physical attraction, it doesn't cause it - at least as I see it.

I can't imagine there being anything a guy, who my wife finds unappealing, could do with his mouth, fingers or dick that would change her baseline attraction to him. Hence, the notion of her "taking one for the team" would make swinging a non-starter for us. Not sure how that even works for a guy - i.e., it would be impossible to get an erection without being physically attracted toward someone. So, as I said earlier, I'd prefer just letting my wife find her hookups and me finding mine. But again, no judgment... Swinging is indeed a real thing, so I know it works for many. And that's wonderful

 

[MaturemanAJ]

I have zero ethical objections to swinging, but have to wonder.... What are the chances of two couples meeting and the sexual attraction is sufficient in all four directions? It seems somewhat remote, to me... It would seem likely that at least one of the four people isn't particularly turned on by their partner. Does this often happen and how do swinging couples deal with it?

That's why I would personally favor an arrangement where my wife finds her NSA (no strings attached) hookup, and I'll find mine. ..And the two need not be married to each other.

In my experience its easier than you think

 

[LMWM321]

In my experience its easier than you think

Well.. You may be right.

I know I can find something sexually attractive about pretty much any woman. And a horny sense of humor goes a long way. But my wife is far more finicky... If the attraction isn't strong and immediate - it's going to feel like I'm asking her to engage in an act she finds dreadful just so I can go forward with my sexual dalliance.

In any case, I'm glad it works for so many people. As I've said countless times, 100 years from now, couples giving each other the occasional space to have sex with others - via swinging, hall passes, etc.. - will be viewed quite differently. Instead of being viewed as fringe activity, it will be the norm - something people do to help keep their primary relationship strong throughout their lifetime together.

 

[MaturemanAJ]

Well.. You may be right.

I know I can find something sexually attractive about pretty much any woman. And a horny sense of humor goes a long way. But my wife is far more finicky... If the attraction isn't strong and immediate - it's going to feel like I'm asking her to engage in an act she finds dreadful just so I can go forward with my sexual dalliance.

In any case, I'm glad it works for so many people. As I've said countless times, 100 years from now, couples giving each other the occasional space to have sex with others - via swinging, hall passes, etc.. - will be viewed quite differently. Instead of being viewed as fringe activity, it will be the norm - something people do to help keep their primary relationship strong throughout their lifetime together.

I agree, humans are not built for long-term monogamous relationships

 

[CuriousinPennsylvania]

........100 years from now, couples giving each other the occasional space to have sex with others - via swinging, hall passes, etc.. - will be viewed quite differently. Instead of being viewed as fringe activity, it will be the norm........

Oh, if only I had been born 100 years from now.

 

[leicesterbiguy]

We met swinging in 2006 and are still at it having been married for a long time. I love the fact my wife has sex with other men.

 

[LMWM321]

I would imagine the sexual excitement of swinging doesn't come from being with someone who is objectively more attractive than your partner, but rather the thrill of being with someone different. ..I know that would HAVE to be the appeal for me because I find my wife to be hotter than pretty much ANY woman in our social circle and I think she feels the same way about me.

My point is, I guess you can't be especially picky when you're a swinger. Because if you are, most potential hookups will never get very far. You'll meet the couple, then one or more will say, "sorry but you're not my type."

 

[Gr82meetu2]

I would imagine the sexual excitement of swinging doesn't come from being with someone who is objectively hotter than your partner, but rather the thrill of being with someone different. ..I know that would HAVE to be the appeal for me because I find my wife to be hotter than pretty much ANY woman in our social circle and I think she feels the same way about me.

My point is, you can't be especially picky when you're a swinger. Because if you are, most potential hookups will never get very far. You'll meet the couple, then one or more will say, "sorry but you're not my type."

I think this is true

 

[LeeKee]

In my experience its easier than you think

I've got to get the inside info on that! Looking to spice things up with my wife

 

[BiWifeMyrtleBeach]

In my experience its easier than you think

We have found that to be the case as well. I especially seem to have a "knack" for finding other bi or at least bi curious women. There are alot more out there than many realize.

 

[MaturemanAJ]

We have found that to be the case as well. I especially seem to have a "knack" for finding other bi or at least bi curious women. There are alot more out there than many realize.

Exactly

 

[MaturemanAJ]

I think we go through life not paying attention to our surroundings.
When you are out look around and see who is looking your way.
I tend to be more interested in the ones that will maintain eye contact because they are not just casually interested or attracted

 

[Handydan]

We thought it would be hard to find interested couples. But my wife is quite bold and we discovered it quite easy to meet people.

 

[CuriousinPennsylvania]

"the thrill of being with someone different"

That's IT - exactly.

 

[MileHighBlackDiamond]

We are active swingers in Denver, vibrant community, usually a few parties or events each week if we want something to do.

We have traveled for lifestyle vacations, Florida, California and Mexico, Bliss Cruise coming up in Feb 2026.

I have zero ethical objections to swinging, but have to wonder.... What are the chances of two couples meeting and the sexual attraction is sufficient in all four directions? It seems somewhat remote, to me... It would seem likely that at least one of the four people isn't particularly turned on by their partner. Does this often happen and how do swinging couples deal with it?

We never go to our club or an event with expectations. I would say we're about 45/55 meeting a couple where all 4 connect and we want to play. Orgies can help if there isn't any attraction for one of us to a couple of the people. Everyone is together, move freely between those they want to play with, allowing for an experience that may not have happened if it was just 2 of the couples.

We have established a friendship with a couple that we met in California and have since hosted 2 times for 3-4 days each visit. We do play with each other if the mood strikes, it isn't necessary nor expected, as we spend most of the time at our home naked so the sexual tension is definitely high.

 

[savagetempest]

I have zero ethical objections to swinging, but have to wonder.... What are the chances of two couples meeting and the sexual attraction is sufficient in all four directions? It seems somewhat remote, to me... It would seem likely that at least one of the four people isn't particularly turned on by their partner. Does this often happen and how do swinging couples deal with it?

That's why I would personally favor an arrangement where my wife finds her NSA (no strings attached) hookup, and I'll find mine. ..And the two need not be married to each other.

I'm kind of hijacking the 1st time idea here, but I had to express my agreement. We've had quite a few threesomes with women (FFM). The obstacle to a potential MMF or another couple is this weird pressure I feel that a new man has to satisfy my husband's fantasy of who I might fuck.... So we've hit a few swingers clubs, with not much luck. With a separate NSA approach, I can just have a great time then tell the stories in a way that will make my Man rock hard and ready.

 

[EmmAgain]

My husband and I have been swinging since 2018. We both love the lifestyle and nowadays hang out with the same three or four couples. We’ve attended fairly up-market clubs and events in the US, London, Sydney, Bali etc in our travels.

It’s not for everyone. But it’s most definitely for us. We just need to figure out how to adapt everything once our family starts growing!

 

[pace_purr]

Curious to know how many here are genuine, practising swingers?

Really not interested in fantasists and wannabes. Please don't post if you wank thinking about your best mate sorting your wife out for you.

We were in the swinging lifestyle for thirty years had some great times and a few bloody awful ones

 

[LittleGreene]

We were in the swinging lifestyle for thirty years had some great times and a few bloody awful ones

We’re still very knew to actually playing rather than fantasising.
We’ve only had good experiences. Would be very curious to hear about those experiences that weren’t good? Why didn’t they work? Could things have been avoided?

 

[Kimlikes]

We were in the swinging lifestyle for thirty years had some great times and a few bloody awful ones

We have been in the life as long as you and yes we have had some moments of awful but we’ve had a lot more moments of fun