The cool clique

[TaintedB]

This story made me crack up laughing!

Pretty silly, eh?

 

[Netzach]

What is that message? That it is a punishment and bad thing to be a male submissive?

yeah, fundamentally.

 

[Netzach]

As a quasi-Dominant, I can't think of any worse punishment personally.

As a dominant I find the whole notion of submitting to punishment from some random self appointed committee completely... meaningless. I don't play that shit in my interpersonal relationships, I certainly don't play it in a social setting. I think my ego and reputation could survive submitting in a relationship. I think that I'd never have either again if I submitted to some kangaroo court.

 

[snowy ciara]

and then there's the whole self-respect thing. I'm getting shades of that Hollywood cliche, "You'll never work in this town again!"

 

[Marquis]

and then there's the whole self-respect thing. I'm getting shades of that Hollywood cliche, "You'll never work in this town again!"

Ha ha, there is a lot of that going on.

Even subs mentor each other in this little group, and I'm beginning to get the sense it's all set up to cockblock predator's like me from taking down our fair game.

I'm telling you they are going to have S&M finishing school and D/s summer camps in this new century.

 

[incubus'_sub]

And I can't imagine any REAL Dom submitting to a bunch of wankers in this way at all, or, for that matter, committing the punishable offense in the first place. Wannabees with an ego problem, yes.

Open social events will always attract those types, as well as the mildly curious, the fanatics, the truly experienced & the likely beginners. All you have to do is remain polite, use your own judgement & if it's not to your taste, leave. You can always follow up the people you did enjoy later privately.

 

[TaintedB]

yeah, fundamentally.

I wonder if they would have punished a mis-behaving submissive by making him or her be a dom? I am not sure, but if I were silly enough to appoint myself as a judge of everbody else who does bdsm in my city in the first place, I probably would lack the imagination to think of that.

 

[Esclava]

One of those kinky weekend adventurers is one of my favorite bottoms. He understands and sees through the piles of bullshit that "honor respect and trust" supposed lifestylers who can't manage a child let alone a sub often leave in their wake. It's not who's new that's creepy to me, it's what IS at the top. The more public and more recognized leadership in a community is often the most dysfunctional element.

I too, really really have a lot of scepticism where the "mentorship" ladder is concerned. Especially since many of the skilled and capable people I know are 1. really young and often written off or 2. not claiming to be 24/7 D/s and usually written off.

Give me someone who's honest about their sexuality and views SM as sexuality any day over someone who claims to be all lofty and can't walk the walk. Additionally, almost all, almost ALL the "service subs" self-proclaimed that I've known who are loudest about it are the ones who expect sex in return the most.

I've put a big big moratorium on my "group" involvement over the last couple of years. M also is not a big joiner and dares to ask the hard questions of people. When I was new to things I was not nearly as independently minded, good for him.

I can identify with being "written off" - and I agree that one can NEVER discount self-honesty, self-awareness and the ability to ask questions. My O/L Dom told me that even as a submissive, I have the RIGHT to question anyone who desired to dominate me. And I can assure you I ask hard questions - about their history, personality, character, desires, friends, family, and their entire life. He also told me, "If They won't be questioned, They are not worth your time or consideration."

Make no mistake these questions take time and I don't ask them all at once - but I sincerely believe that if more subs (of both sexes) took a bit more time to do the same, there would be much less chaos and ugliness in our world. It might also help weed out people who see "this thing we do" as a stepping stone to a higher social order. Not that I'd like to see them weeded out - to each his/her own - but I, too, much prefer to deal with people on a honest level.

Esclava

 

[Esclava]

and then there's the whole self-respect thing. I'm getting shades of that Hollywood cliche, "You'll never work in this town again!"

Yeah - and just who do they think they are, anyway - God?

lmsao

Esclava

 

[Marquis]

*putting hand over microphone and looking away from flash*

"No more questions!"

 

[s'lara]

While lots of the clique communities described have their fair share of self-described BDSM monarchs, it would be tough to try and rule a kingdom without any subjects.

People usually listen to those who talk the loudest and not necessarily to what's being said. Just as the clique-makers are responsible for creating these silly worlds, lots of people willingly join without question. Who's the bigger fool? The fool or the fool who follows him?

*shrug*

lara