*When his eyes open, she's gone. Vanished to seek other pleasures. He can't blame her. If he were in different circumstances, she'd be what he wanted too. For now though, the only calling that beckons him is the allure of the waves. He stands and leaps into the surf, swimming out further than he has gone before. His lungs burn with his efforts. His arms and legs are tired and sore. Yet, he still treads water out there in the pull of the waves. He's not sure if he's getting closer to shore or more distant from it. The moon is high again, drawing the tide toward the beach in a long slow tug. He swims like a fish, like someone who belongs there. Eventually he grows too exhausted and he must return to dry land. He lays on his back, breathing raggedly and watching the lunar sphere drifting over the horizon.*
He is not sure what urged him to come back today... over 4 months since his last stop through. but whatever the reason he felt compelled to come here today. He sits in a chair and sips his soda as he stares out at the waves, thinking, remembering.
My feet move along the shore line, heading for the rock that I used to sit on, once upon a time. It's been months since I last made use of this stretch of sand. Not because I don't relish the quiet, I do.
But sometimes, I am not sure where I fit or even if I still do fit...so I avoid other people's places, like the plague. I am sure no one is here though and glancing up at the Outlook only serves to make sure that I am right.
So.
Strip away the clothing.
Jeans, boots, socks, beater.
Stride into the water. It's cold but I don't feel it, not really.
Dive.
Swim, toward the rock.
Cold fingers scrabble for purchase.
Climb up.
Now. Face the sun and settle.
The quiet is only interrupted by the screech of gulls and the pounding of the surf. It's not perfect but it will do.
only one more day.
My mom's birthday is tomorrow.
Only one more day.
I can do this. Maybe. But a break down is in the offing, I can tell. And when it hits...all that I am will be carried away.
One more day.
I wait it out. On the rock, in the sea, near the Outlook.
Glancing out from the darkened windows of the house, I see la belle loupe upon the rock. All at once I know that this battle is hers to fight, but that doesn't mean that the ground crew must abandon their post.
The life preserver isn't heavy, not even half the burden that the wolf carries, and though it isn't much, it's something.
Tied around a rock on the shore that I know won't ever move, I toss the life preserver out into the rocky sea, where it floats and bumps against the rock that holds one of my dearest ones.
It isn't much, but it is a way home when she's ready.
Eyes watch the wolf go, its been long since he has spoken to his friend, but he respects the wolf too much to invade her personal space, at least for now. He remains on the deck where he's passed the entire evening. He knows that she will seek company out if she wants it, silently he whispers a prayer for the wolf and blows her a kiss.
The desire had been building for days, for hours, for minutes, she had glanced out the window where out of the corner of her eye she had spotted the outdoor shower. The sun was out, warm, the waves crashed on her beach. It was hard to resist.
She wouldn't resist anymore.
Setting up her little radio, she turned it up loud, the song pumped from the speakers, warring with the waves for noisiest object around. But she didn't care, the water was turned on and she danced under the sky.
Her hips bounced to the beat, while her now wet hair swung back and forth. She smiled, laughed, and jumped up as the beat washed over her, just like the water.
Strutting to the beat, she sang a long....
"I've got the moves like Jagger, with those moves like Jagger..."
It was wonderful, the sun kissing her skin, the water tingling over her body and her heartbeat that raced with the song, matched her hips and hair which were flung, bounced and rolled to the beat.
The song finished and she felt a million times better, wrapping herself up in a towel and sauntering back up the stairs to the deck, where she laid out and let the sun dry her.
It's been a while but the sun is out and that means there's no where better than the seaside.
Bare feet carry me up the steps from the beach, towards the cliff top bar.
Waves crashing enticingly down below, a member of staff spots my approach and soon enough I'm leaning on the rail, sea breezes toying with my hair and dress, sipping something long and cool and smiling in the sunshine, blue eyes watching the sparkles dance across the ocean.