The Thread About Your Stories

[Svenskaflicka]

The animal should be warned, in whatever system of squeaks, whistles or hand signals is deemed best, about the embarrassing and near-tragic result of a pool filtration system flirtation, which happened to a Miami man at a motel a few years ago.

He became swollen somehow and couldn't remove himself from the, uh, object of his affection, and had to scream for help at 3 a.m., to the delight of the hotel manager who called 911, the 911 operator, and the emergency rescue crew she summoned, none of whom could stop laughing. The 911 tapes of the incident were played repeatedly on local TV and radio for a week.

I think it wasn't the hole hat suck water out, but the one that sprays water in. Apparently, the dolphin enjoyed having the water rush over his dolphinhood.

 

[champagne1982]

ella, I like "dolphinhood", but then what would the female's 'down there' be called? or is it 'under there'?

If women have pussies.. then wouldn't the female dolphin.. aka "cow" have a catfishy? In the spirit of calling male human parts bird related names, wouldn't the bull dolphin have a flying fish?

p.s. it's not the parts you can see but the location of the genital slit that identifies what sex the dolphins are.

 

[pop_54]

Sounds fishy to me

It is also reputed that Dolpnins are the only animals, other than humans, who can truly recognise their own image in a mirror.

Most other creatures show fear, agression, total disinterest, or try to fuck it, when first confronted with a mirror. Dolphins, like us, immediately begin to pose and admire the image in the glass.

You'll be pleased to know though Joe, very few Dolphins smoke.

pops crap contribution to the thread. Must go have a woodbine now.

 

[Gary Chambers]

Dolphins are cool, but limited to pool filtration systems, whereas we can take up agriculture and gain access to automatic milking machines. (Ourch! That hurt. Sorry about that.)

Gary Chambers

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I'm thinking of dying my hair. What colour do you think would look good on me?

 

[Svenskaflicka]

OK, I've chosen chocolate brown. I've got the dye-mousse in my hair right now. In 15 minutes, I'll be a brunette, moahahaha!


The weird sensations of tickling and pricking in my scalp don't worry me. But is it really supposed to BUBBLE?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

The weird sensations of tickling and pricking in my scalp don't worry me. But is it really supposed to BUBBLE?

You're thinking too hard...boiling the solution with too much brain activity.

lucky

 

[Svenskaflicka]

But... but... but I haven't even reached my daily quota of thoughts yet?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

But... but... but I haven't even reached my daily quota of thoughts yet?

Just put them on pause for fifteen minutes until you rinse...and as a brunette, watch out...the thoughts will be much more plentiful and productive

lucky

Let me know if you have less fun than when blonde...

 

[Svenskaflicka]

OK, something's very wrong here. My hair doesn't look anything like the model on the front of the box.

 

[lucky-E-leven]

OK, something's very wrong here. My hair doesn't look anything like the model on the front of the box.

Forgot to read the fine print, did ya?

lucky

 

[Svenskaflicka]

It smells funny, too.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I want my money back. I'm still blond!

 

[minsue]

OK, something's very wrong here. My hair doesn't look anything like the model on the front of the box.

Don't know about hair dye over there, but in the US the cheap do-it-yourself dye (which I've always believed is the same as the expensive have a salon do it dye, but then I'm cheap. ) is generally made for dying gray out or highlighting/lowlighting your natural color. Most brown or dark red dyes say somewhere in the fine print that they are not to be used on blondes. During the years I spent denying my blondeness, my hair never came out the color on the box. It was a shocker the first couple of times, but after awhile you learn to take your light natural color into account when picking the dye color and can compensate somewhat.

- Mindy

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I went back to the shop and got my money back. I went to another store and bought a different sort of hair dye. I got home, put the stuff in my hair, and checked the time. The stuff was supposed to be in for 5 minutes.

What it DIDN'T say in the instructions, though it SHOULD have, was: "disconnect your phone, so you won't be disturbed while dying your hair".

Mum called. I tried my best to hold the phone to my ear without getting it wet from my hair, that was dripping, and I kept drying dye away from my neck and shoulders. When we hung up, the dye had been in my har almost half an hour.

I washed the dye out hoping that my hair wouldn't be damaged from this intense-dying it was subjected to. I dried my hair, and -

voila! I'm STILL FUCKING BLOND!!!!


OK, that's it. I'm booking a time at a hairdresser tomorrow. It will cost me over $80, but WTF...

 

[minsue]

What the hell kind of hair dye do they sell there? Personally, I always left it in at least an hour, but the instructions usually said somewhere between 15-30 minutes. I would not trust a product that claims it can dye your hair in 5 minutes. That just ain't right.

- Mindy, lazy so back to being blonde

 

[Guest]

When you get it done at the salon (at least here) it stays in 35 minutes after she's finished putting it on (which means some of it is on longer.) I need to get mine done again, the brown and gray are starting to peek through the red.

I don't wanna be a brunette again!!

CM