Useless Doms?

[Betticus]

I'll start to say something and then have a hard time finishing the sentences as I think and remember in pictures and visualizations. Sometimes I forget which words go with the things I'm trying to say.

I was totally drunk one time out in the evening and was flirting with a girl from Mexico that didn't speak English. I belted out one of the most eloquent things I've ever said to a girl and about seven people were just staring at me like I grew an extra arm out of my face. Then I realized that what I had just said came out in a combination of Spanish, German and French. It's been ages since I took high school Spanish, I haven't lived in Germany since I was a baby and I had only started to study the most basic French. I don't know where the hell it came from!

 

[Kailey_86]

I'll start to say something and then have a hard time finishing the sentences as I think and remember in pictures and visualizations. Sometimes I forget which words go with the things I'm trying to say.

i'm not the only one. Whew!

 

[FemdomRule]

I'd say your Dom is very insulting and knows how to make you feel insignificant. He is insisting you are the one who is inept and incapable of doing things right. I'd say he's the browbeating type.

 

[myinnerslut]

I'd say your Dom is very insulting and knows how to make you feel insignificant. He is insisting you are the one who is inept and incapable of doing things right. I'd say he's the browbeating type.

im a bit confused... who are you directing this comment to?

 

[graceanne]

LOL gracie! Though Master Gil wants to know what K is doing pulling things out of the oven in the first place - "that's the subbie's job"

Master Gil has a tendency to forget stuff. Like what he went into the kitchen for. Sometimes He just has to stand up and turn around and He's forgotten what He was going to do. He will ask me "What was I going to do?" and I will say "I don't know, you didn't tell me". I'm supposed to be a mind reader!

K likes to cook, and it's a good thing, cause their have been days that I didn't have the energy. Beyond that the stove makes me nervous, I don't always have the upper-body strength to pull the heavier things out, so he does it for me.

 

[Netzach]

I'm the Domme and I cook. I'll take anything out of the oven, too. Dishes are another issue.

 

[Betticus]

I'd say your Dom is very insulting and knows how to make you feel insignificant. He is insisting you are the one who is inept and incapable of doing things right. I'd say he's the browbeating type.

Well, women only really feel comfortable when they have a man in charge of them, keeping them safe from the world and telling them what to do and how to do it. You see, they are genetically predisposed to seek out real men and not those simpering, whiny types that worship their feet.

Sorry for having to break out that dose of reality but it sounds like your head is in a cloud. Have a cookie and a glass of milk.

 

[lil_slave_rose]

My sub said once that one of the reasons she wanted to submit to me sexually was because she had to look after me in R/L. Meaning that, left to my own devices I would probably "put the cat on the stove and the kettle out for the night" through absent mindedness, or being distracted or some such. So, here is my question: Is this a trait common to Dominant types? Sexually competent but absolutely useless in everyday situations? Or must I blame my incompetence on something else?

my Master is not incompetent quite the opposite actually. He could do the things Himself that i do for Him (except apparently make coffee but that's another story for another thread *giggles*) He is in control of Himself and His life, if He wasn't, i wouldn't have been comfortable with giving control of my life over to Him as i truly believe one must be in control of oneself in order to 'control' another. i can't say that the reason i chose to submit to Master was because He couldnt' take care of Himself, i chose to submit to Master because He showed how in control of Himself He was and how He could Dominate me quite well. i don't think what you're speaking of is a 'common trait' in Dom's at all. and i also know alot of women say things like 'what would you do without me' simply to feel important in their man's life when they know good and well the man could take care of himself if He had to. i wouldn't want to be in a relationship where my Dom could do nothing for Himself, i rather like being in the relationship i'm in because i know He could do it by himself if He wanted to, but chooses to have me do it instead. are there times that it annoys me that it's all up to me? yes, of course, i'm human and alot of times being 'reminded of my place' is not an easy thing for me, and something Master has to work on with me quite often, if He were 'helpless' i don't think He could Dominate me the way He does....i think i'm going off topic so i'll stop but wanted to put my two cents in.....

 

[lil_slave_rose]

I'd say your Dom is very insulting and knows how to make you feel insignificant. He is insisting you are the one who is inept and incapable of doing things right. I'd say he's the browbeating type.

i am wondering who exactly this post was directed to. i've read all of these posts and i'm not seeing where anyone gave this impression of their Domly One....

 

[curvacious]

my SO is not very organized when it comes to everyday things---he's getting better though. I like to be in control of life when it comes to being out of the bedroom but in the bedroom I want him to control it all.

 

[Inconsequential]

So, here is my question: Is this a trait common to Dominant types? Sexually competant but absolutely useless in everyday situations? Or must I blame my incompetance on something else?

I can't think of how many Dom/mes I know that are absentminded, scatterbrained, too busy to remember little things, overworked, overstressed and just plain IN NEED of some sub to look after the affairs of everyday life. Yes they are still Dominant, Yes they still make decisions, and control situations. But as far as details, that's up to the sub to get it right.
I don't think it's incompetance, I just don't believe one person can do ~Everything~. Even in a normal vanilla relationship it takes two people to run a household now days.
I wouldn't label yourself as incompetant, or useless, after all you made it this far in life. You just need a little sub to make sure the details in your life are comfortable.

 

[Inconsequential]

I believe I am competent in most areas - but I still do daft things!! (Now that would be a thread - daft things we Doms have done!! ).

Are there enough pages in Lit for that thread? *giggle* It would be interesting to see what would be admitted.

 

[Inconsequential]

I've been known to get totally distracted by shiny things. I tend to have more than one project going at a time so some of them sit for a while. I also tend to not eat quite right and forget to exercise.

Unless I have a subbie I care for, then things just seem to fall into place and not because she'd doing them either!

I know soo many like this! I'm even like this. It seems that once you have someone else to care for you are reminded to do the little things by telling them to remember to. It just seems more logical to do things yourself when you expect someone else to do them as well. Otherwise we start sounding like hypocrits. Does that make sense? It's getting late... I should wander...

 

[Inconsequential]

I'm the Domme and I cook. I'll take anything out of the oven, too. Dishes are another issue.

Hell ya! I'm with ya on that one.

 

[Inconsequential]

Well, women only really feel comfortable when they have a man in charge of them, keeping them safe from the world and telling them what to do and how to do it. You see, they are genetically predisposed to seek out real men and not those simpering, whiny types that worship their feet.

Maybe in your world. I don't agree with this. I know too many ~Men~ who are predisposed into letting the woman run the world. The normal society of "Mom is in charge" has trained men into believing that the only way to get things right is to do it ~Her~ way. An example of is President Clinton, even tho male, the world knows Hillary was in charge.

 

[AvaAdore]

My partner is a bit useless at times. It kind of cycles. Sometimes he's really good with keeping up with stuff (chores, looking after himself), and sometimes he slips. It's just the kind of person he is. I'm not perfect either, but I'm a bit better at doing regular household stuff than he is I certainly don't feel exploited, but I do get annoyed from time to time.

He is one of those smart but kind of absent-minded people who gets distracted very easily and also gets absorbed into things very easily, and can be kind of obsessive (eg. watching 8 seasons of Stargate SG-1 in just over a week).

He needs looking after sometimes, but I think it has nothing to do with BDSM!

 

[MasterPhoenix]

My sub said once that one of the reasons she wanted to submit to me sexually was because she had to look after me in R/L. Meaning that, left to my own devices I would probaby "put the cat on the stove and the kettle out for the night" through absent mindedness, or being distracted or somesuch. So, here is my question: Is this a trait common to Dominant types? Sexually competant but absolutely useless in everyday situations? Or must I blame my incompetance on something else?

Blame it on something else.

Part of being a Dom is being able to be in control of yourself...

I am good at most things, except making coffee... Long story for another time, which I am sure rose is dying to tell.

 

[lil_slave_rose]

I am good at most things, except making coffee... Long story for another time, which I am sure rose is dying to tell.

*giggles* it's not such a long story really, and yes rose IS dying to tell ..maybe rose will make a thread in the Cafe about that very thing..but for now, i will stop the hijack.....

 

[Betticus]

Maybe in your world. I don't agree with this. I know too many ~Men~ who are predisposed into letting the woman run the world. The normal society of "Mom is in charge" has trained men into believing that the only way to get things right is to do it ~Her~ way. An example of is President Clinton, even tho male, the world knows Hillary was in charge.

I disagree, it strikes me more that Hillary is a sub and Bill is her Dom.

 

[Betticus]

Blame it on something else.

Part of being a Dom is being able to be in control of yourself...

I am good at most things, except making coffee... Long story for another time, which I am sure rose is dying to tell.

I'm sure that there is some parallel universe where every dom is the pinnacle of perfection.

 

[Gil_T2]

LOL gracie! Though Master Gil wants to know what K is doing pulling things out of the oven in the first place - "that's the subbie's job"

Master Gil has a tendency to forget stuff. Like what he went into the kitchen for. Sometimes He just has to stand up and turn around and He's forgotten what He was going to do. He will ask me "What was I going to do?" and I will say "I don't know, you didn't tell me". I'm supposed to be a mind reader!

I was going to post something but I got up & forgot

 

[Gil_T2]

I was going to post something but I got up & forgot

Bugga just realised I didn't get what I got up for as well.

 

[graceanne]

I was going to post something but I got up & forgot

LOL

 

[MasterPhoenix]

I am a Dom, and I can grill some mean steaks....

 

[myinnerslut]

I am a Dom, and I can grill some mean steaks....

yum! can i have one?