VelvetSin
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2010
- Posts
- 373
I thought some more. (I promise, I'll stop doing that in a minute.)
From the dictionary -
con·sent
/kənˈsɛnt/ Show Spelled[kuhn-sent] Show IPA
–verb (used without object)
1.
to permit, approve, or agree; comply or yield (often fol. by to or an infinitive): He consented to the proposal. We asked her permission, and she consented.
2.
Archaic . to agree in sentiment, opinion, etc.; be in harmony.
I bolded the parts I wanted to emphasize, particularly the last one. The following is based on that basic definition.
I do think it comes down to the informed choice or consent of the pyl, else how can you "permit, approve, or agree" and ultimately find "harmony?" Brainwashing can make one think true harmony has been achieved, but it makes it no less damaging. No matter what pretense you want to put on D/s being about what the Master wants, a consensual relationship cannot be consensual unless informed consent has been given. I see anything else as abuse, but maybe that's just coming from my perspective? I don't know.
If the pyl has knowingly given away that freedom with the understanding of what that relinquished freedom entails, it's a consensual relationship. If the PYL makes the choice for him/her, or gets that consent without including full disclosure of what all is included *and* allows re-evaluation after a time (if this makes you truly unhappy, we'll take another look at it), it could be argued to be abuse. It isn't consent if a supposed PYL takes that liberty without giving the pyl the information and understanding of what that permission would entail.
From the dictionary -
con·sent
/kənˈsɛnt/ Show Spelled[kuhn-sent] Show IPA
–verb (used without object)
1.
to permit, approve, or agree; comply or yield (often fol. by to or an infinitive): He consented to the proposal. We asked her permission, and she consented.
2.
Archaic . to agree in sentiment, opinion, etc.; be in harmony.
I bolded the parts I wanted to emphasize, particularly the last one. The following is based on that basic definition.
I do think it comes down to the informed choice or consent of the pyl, else how can you "permit, approve, or agree" and ultimately find "harmony?" Brainwashing can make one think true harmony has been achieved, but it makes it no less damaging. No matter what pretense you want to put on D/s being about what the Master wants, a consensual relationship cannot be consensual unless informed consent has been given. I see anything else as abuse, but maybe that's just coming from my perspective? I don't know.
If the pyl has knowingly given away that freedom with the understanding of what that relinquished freedom entails, it's a consensual relationship. If the PYL makes the choice for him/her, or gets that consent without including full disclosure of what all is included *and* allows re-evaluation after a time (if this makes you truly unhappy, we'll take another look at it), it could be argued to be abuse. It isn't consent if a supposed PYL takes that liberty without giving the pyl the information and understanding of what that permission would entail.
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