What type of humiliations led to your SPH fetish?

[policywank]

Interesting. . . I’ve definitely encountered those who were like “finally! I get to be mean!”. . . Which can be hot in the moment but doesn’t always translate to healthy boundaries.

Well I think that when playing a dominant or top role there is some element of that. You don't want to get too deep into that mindset, but it helps your partner enjoy the experience if they know that you are enjoying it too. It is a matter of allowing myself that indulgence without losing sight of the well being of the man I am compelling to submit. I don't want to be a bitch or destructive, but sadistic is a bit of a different thing.

 

[whenagain]

Well I think that when playing a dominant or top role there is some element of that. You don't want to get too deep into that mindset, but it helps your partner enjoy the experience if they know that you are enjoying it too. It is a matter of allowing myself that indulgence without losing sight of the well being of the man I am compelling to submit. I don't want to be a bitch or destructive, but sadistic is a bit of a different thing.

Oh for sure. As the recipient of this play I want my partner to enjoy themselves as well, so a bit of sadism works wonders.

What I think some people don’t realize (but you clearly do) is that like most fetishes, there’s a lot of ways to do it. And one size (see what I did thee) doesn’t fit all.

 

[policywank]

Oh for sure. As the recipient of this play I want my partner to enjoy themselves as well, so a bit of sadism works wonders.

What I think some people don’t realize (but you clearly do) is that like most fetishes, there’s a lot of ways to do it. And one size (see what I did thee) doesn’t fit all.

Yes. And in my opinion a "good" Dom or Top is very dialled into what there partner wants. There is a degree of self indulgence and perhaps sadism, but it needs to fit into what works overall for both parties. I will take the lead and I will take it in a direction that appeals to me, but only if I know it appeals to my partner too. We are indulging a non-traditional type of stimulation, not hurting one another even if the casual observer doesn't quite get that.

 

[irishblade]

Not sure what it was for me. I’ve always known I was small. When I was in jr high and high school, I lived in a small town so I’d just go home to shower after gym.

When I was 24 or so, I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me while I was away for a week. I got home while she was at work and found a pair of extremely wet panties on the floor. That definitely turned me on but I don’t know how big the guy that made them so wet was.

SPH just kind of developed I think. Also, I was diagnosed with gynecomastia at a young age so I knew I had more estrogen than other males. My tits are nice though ;-) Lol

 

[NancyPan]

I have always (since teenage) been aroused by women who I perceive as “haughty,” superior, and dismissive of me, especially attractive and intelligent, capable women. I believe this started by being rejected and teased by the “popular girls” in early teenage when I was tall, gangly, and awkward. Then, when I started having the desire to wear panties (and started doing so), I started imagining what these types of desirable girls and women would think if they knew. The thought aroused me. Part of me was petrified about discovery, part of me wanted girls/women to know.

Then I started to realize (read about) penis size and realize that mine was smaller than average. I had some SPH fantasies, but got married, had kids, had sex on a fairly regular basis with my wife. I lived with the illusion that she was okay with it. And I felt lucky that I had married one of those bright, attractive women that had intimidated and aroused me in teenage. But, she was naturally dominant. After empty nest we had some open conversations about sex (leading to the FLR we have now and my wearing panties 24/7), and she told me that she preferred my tongue/mouth to my penis because of my size and my tendency to PE.

I was at first devastated. But, as she understood that I was aroused by erotic humiliation, she has used it to control and arouse me. I am now accepting of it, but still aroused when she makes me tell her why it is not worthy of her pussy and I must ask to cum in some other humiliating way.

So, it wasn’t one or two experiences, it was an evolution. But it fits with my submission.

 

[PapaRomantic]

I have always (since teenage) been aroused by women who I perceive as “haughty,” superior, and dismissive of me, especially attractive and intelligent, capable women. I believe this started by being rejected and teased by the “popular girls” in early teenage when I was tall, gangly, and awkward. Then, when I started having the desire to wear panties (and started doing so), I started imagining what these types of desirable girls and women would think if they knew. The thought aroused me. Part of me was petrified about discovery, part of me wanted girls/women to know.

Then I started to realize (read about) penis size and realize that mine was smaller than average. I had some SPH fantasies, but got married, had kids, had sex on a fairly regular basis with my wife. I lived with the illusion that she was okay with it. And I felt lucky that I had married one of those bright, attractive women that had intimidated and aroused me in teenage. But, she was naturally dominant. After empty nest we had some open conversations about sex (leading to the FLR we have now and my wearing panties 24/7), and she told me that she preferred my tongue/mouth to my penis because of my size and my tendency to PE.

I was at first devastated. But, as she understood that I was aroused by erotic humiliation, she has used it to control and arouse me. I am now accepting of it, but still aroused when she makes me tell her why it is not worthy of her pussy and I must ask to cum in some other humiliating way.

So, it wasn’t one or two experiences, it was an evolution. But it fits with my submission.

Has your wife taken to enjoying men with larger cocks than you? If so, does that help you play into your arousal?

 

[NancyPan]

Has your wife taken to enjoying men with larger cocks than you? If so, does that help you play into your arousal?

No, we have a totally monogamous relationship. That has never been something she has had an interest in doing. She prefers her vibrator and oral worship. And, the power of my incredible unmet desire for her pussy!

 

[SPARTAN047]

I think it's having my clitty being called small by guys and a few girls who turned me down, looking for gangbangs or being a genuine slut.

 

[TooSmallDave]

My dick is 3 inches when hard and a (circumsized) button when soft. I think I was always aware it was small but tried not to think about it. At 16 my first real girlfriend was older than me, she was my first and she soon complained that she couldn't feel much when we had sex, and that I kept slipping out. She cheated on me and got cross with me because I couldn't satisfy her and we broke up. After that I went out with girls who hadn't been with a guy before but they soon became frustrated and found that I was very small and slept with other men while we went out then left me. I was still in denial in my 20 years and had some humiliating experiences; once as a nude model for art students who giggled and tittered all through the 2 hour session, some of them were friends of my brother's girlfriend, skinny dipping and even taking a role in a play that I had to be naked on stage and there were gasps of shock from the audience. I lived with a girl who had always been a self confessed size queen. She was very open about how small I am compared to other men. We tried a threesome with another man which was the first time I'd seen what a man with a big dick can do to a woman, I didn't get a look in while they fucked but she let me go on top of her when they'd finished and poke my dick in her and smiled when I came quickly. They fucked again in the night but I just lay with my back to them. We also invited another couple back to swap partners. This was awful, she and the guy fucked all night while i came very quickly and had to apologise to his disappointed girlfriend. She cheated on me, had affairs, brought someone home from the pub on her birthday as a special treat. I became aware that the pain and humiliation was intensely erotic and I began to masturbate to scenes of my humiliation and cuckoldry. It was when she went on holiday with a girlfriend with a large box of condoms in her suitcase that I really became aware that my reality was developing into a fetish; I spent the week wanking, I told some girls at work that she was cheating on me and why. I discovered some stories in porn mags that involved wives cheating with men with bigger cocks. However it was still painful and we split up.
When I met my wife she had come out of a relationship with a guy who was known for his big cock and his wild behaviour. She said she wanted to settle down with someone gentle like me. When we first had sex she told me I needed to go deeper and faster if I wanted to make her cum. She didn't seem to mind and told me I was considerate because I would use my mouth to make her cum after I'd finished. Just before agreeing to get engaged she spent a weekend with the ex. She said it was to get her addiction to his big cock out of her system. She never cheated on me or teased me or mentioned how small I am afterwards. We played some femdom games to spice our sex life up before we had kids. Our sex is poor. When we do fuck it's the knowledge that she can't feel me inside her that arouses me to orgasm. Now I play all my humiliating experiences in my mind and jerk my little dick to them. I still find it intensely erotic, better than the perfunctory 'real sex' ever was.

 

[CuckinTx]

For the guys who have SPH fetish, how many humiliations did you suffer before developing this fetish?

My first time happened in my early 20's, it caught me completely by surprise. I was standing at a urinal in a restaurant bathroom and there was an older black man using the urinal to the right of me. I noticed he was making weird faces and he seemed to be staring at my penis. He got finished urinating before I did, and as he was walking toward the exit door, he stopped and turned around back in my direction. He started laughing loudly and he taunted me by chanting, "He got a little dick! He got a little dick!"

When I realized he was mocking my small penis size, my face turned red with embarrassment, but I didn't dare utter a word. In the heat of the moment, I was afraid he might hurt me if I said anything mean back to him or defended myself. I think that aspect was one of the triggers that eventually resulted in my SPH, that I hadn't defended myself to him, I just stayed silent and he got the feeling of a full ego victory over me.

For the next few months, I kept remembering that event and pondering if I was really small. I did some research and read that the average US male has a flaccid size of 3.6 inches. I found a cloth tape measure and measured my penis. I was shocked by how small I was when flaccid, just 2 inches. I was already naturally a very shy person so finding out I had a small penis made me feel even more submissive.

I soon stumbled into the online world of SPH and forced feminization. It began to make sense to me that small dicks like mine belonged in panties.

Started with my best friend. He wasn't much taller but was much bigger than me. I was 4.5 inches at best and he was 8-9 inches. When we hung out with girls he would refer to me as little Logan and him big Logan, as we were both named Logan. So all the girls we knew would call me little Logan. One time we were in the hot tub and my buddy suggested we all get naked. It was him and I and three girls. We all got naked and within 5 min he asks if anyone needed a drink. The girls said yes and he then said hey Logan...do you mind getting us some drinks. I had no choice but to get out naked. I walked to the fridge grabbed the drinks but I couldn't hide my small penis. With my hands full with beers I was exposed. As I walked back with beers in hand he said he guys- it's Little Logan with even smaller Logan. They all laughed but in that moment I knew that everyone knew I had a small penis. It's nearly nub size when I am soft. It's so small it doesn't hang down. Later that night at home I thought of the moment and got excited and kinda relieved the girls saw me so small. That point in I get excited when someone sees my small penis and they make comments about it. He ended up fucking 3-4 of my girlfriends.

 

[Lucy_Lastic]

I'm 6.5 long by 6 around, so not really small. But she was with a black guy many years ago who was maybe 9 inches and thick. When we're fucking she tells me how much bigger and better he was.

While we're actually on the job it arouses me like crazy. But after I feel jealous and humiliated.

You should tell her how you feel after. She should be giving aftercare and reassurance.

 

[subdudeme13]

You should tell her how you feel after. She should be giving aftercare and reassurance.

There are dildos that go over the cock for a strapon. You could give her 12" of hard pounding cock.

 

[NancyPan]

It is difficult for most women to comprehend the psyche of a guy who is into sph or any form of erotic humiliation. My wife did not understand it, verbalized confusion about it, did not want to hurt me by saying the “wrong” ting. She initially felt similarly about orgasm denial, didn’t understand why I wouldn’t want to cum as often as possible. Then, as she experimented, she saw the POWER. She saw how excited and utterly helpless I would become when she teased me and denied me her pussy because of my inadequacy… SHE has learned all too well, and I love her for it! I am pussy-whipped and I live to worship HER pussy.

 

[Jerryteroga]

I was 15 the first time i was laughed at by 4 women, 16 turned down by one women because she felt me and said she would never feel me,17 had sex with 2 other women of which both were extremly dissapointed and showed no signs of even feeling me, and then my wife seemed to work for many years until she told me that i am alot smaller than she would like and she struggles to orgasm with me. She basically told me 2 times my size would be her ideal prefference. This is what set me over the top and realized i enjoyed her honesty and now i love being humiliated for my small penis.

 

[NancyPan]

I was 15 the first time i was laughed at by 4 women, 16 turned down by one women because she felt me and said she would never feel me,17 had sex with 2 other women of which both were extremly dissapointed and showed no signs of even feeling me, and then my wife seemed to work for many years until she told me that i am alot smaller than she would like and she struggles to orgasm with me. She basically told me 2 times my size would be her ideal prefference. This is what set me over the top and realized i enjoyed her honesty and now i love being humiliated for my small penis.

What did you do about sex in your marriage after your wife told you? After we had “the talk,” we moved more towards FLR and oral worship and use of a vibrator and dildo. Now, I have not been allowed PIV sex for years and she controls my orgasms to keep me aroused and obedient.