Why I fear the lifestyle

[UCE]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: For What It's Worth...

First who is the woman with the hair?

I think the abuse of trust that I experenced is what is bothering me the most. And if I could be this wrong about someone for so long... how can I trust myself again in repect to my choice of people ?

I will not ask where I Would find these moral women ... but I will ask ... how do I know if/when I found them?

To answer your questions, I do not know who that redhead is. She's just a pretty model I found on a free picture site online. I like to post porn images under my messages. Usually they do not have anything to do with the message itself.

I hear what you're saying about the abuse of trust and how it makes you question your own judgement. I'd be asking myself the same question if I were you, and I wouldn't know how to answer it.

Moral women: I am going to think on this and answer you at more length tommorow. Here are a couple signs I have noticed that indicate these people to me:

--They have a strong sense of what is fair and unfair in the world that goes entirely against the way things actually work. You will hear them exclaim to you when they see something awful on TV or walk past someone destitute, "That just ISN'T FAIR!" or "This is just not RIGHT!" They feel sorry for the underdog, they get outraged at injustice, they have great sympathy for those more unfortunate than them.

--They help their friends when those friends go into crisis. They don't just say "poor so and so" and then ignore them. They will also find it initially hard to believe when horrible things happen to your or their other friends. They'll be initially flabbergasted and keep saying, "but that's just not right!"

--They will have a strong sense about what is fair and unfair in a relationship with you, and if you do something that "seems" unfair to them, whether it is in the context of the relationship or not, they will not hesitate to call you on it!

--Only a person who has kept a lot of her childlike innocence alive will react in these sorts of ways, and she will probably act innocent in other ways too.

--She'll give money to the guys running the scam at the supermarket parking lot until you order her not to. She'll be a generous person, no matter what her actual state of wealth is, and will give to any and sundry who ask and may need to be taugt how to be a bit more discriminating in this area.

OK, that is for starters. As you know, not all women act like the above, so they should be fairly easy to spot. I'm going to ask my master if he has anything better to add then reply again tommorow.

Regards,
Unda

 

[nawtyleanni]

Hi there Richard. I'm sorry to hear that you are going through such a tough time. Best of luck to you.

I don't know you or your ex-wive at all, but you sound like an intelligent and considerate person in your posts. I think I kinda understand how you must feel. Either you could have seen this coming, and are therefore perhaps partially guilty of what your Ex accuses you of. Or, there was no way you could have possibly predicted that your wive would come to feel the way she does about the "lifestyle;" in which case, you feel powerless and as if you could easily make the same mistake again (in chosing mates).

I think there is a 3rd possibility though. Perhaps there were "signs" that she was in the lifesytle for the wrong reasons, but you failed to pick up on them. That doesn't make you abusive at all. It just means that the you lacked the required knowledge and experience to discern between when someone is in the lifesytle because they genuinely love it, or when someone is pretending to love the lifestyle (and perhaps convinces herself that she loves it in the process) to please and secure a mate. Now, you have more experience and might be able to better tell between the two.

On the otherhand, maybe your EX is just a lying, vengeful bitch. Or maybe her values have changed, and she feels guilty about some of the things she's done. By blaming you for it all, she can avoid responsibility for her actions.

Was she seeing a psychotherapist? When I was in therapy, my Dr. was convinced that a lot of sexuality was "acting out." I think because he found it hard to believe that a "mentally healthy" female could truly enjoy "fucking like a man." I used to call him "Psycho, the rapist" because he seemed a little wacky himself, and would charge me full price unless I cancelled an appointment 24 hours in advance.

Anyways, those are some of the thoughts I had when I read your post. I don't know your specific situation, and I'm no expert on BDSM, but I thought I would share anways. Hope you don't mind.

 

[artful]

Richard,...

...I will just add one more thing I should have included in my prior post. A marriage LICENSE can ALLOW a male, or female either one, to file divorce proceedings. Divorce in ANY flavor, is 99 % bitter, to anyone who has had an occasion to *taste* it.

Divorce courts OFTEN, rule in favor of the one who petitions for divorce. I don't feel that practicing BDSM is your *fear*, it is the financial and emotional COMMITTMENT to *marriage* that causes you tomake the statements you have made.

(JMHO),...but it's mine,...and I own it.

 

[Richard49]

Re: Richard,...

...I will just add one more thing I should have included in my prior post. A marriage LICENSE can ALLOW a male, or female either one, to file divorce proceedings. Divorce in ANY flavor, is 99 % bitter, to anyone who has had an occasion to *taste* it.

Divorce courts OFTEN, rule in favor of the one who petitions for divorce. I don't feel that practicing BDSM is your *fear*, it is the financial and emotional COMMITTMENT to *marriage* that causes you tomake the statements you have made.

(JMHO),...but it's mine,...and I own it.

I am the one that filed for the divorce at her request.