Tales from the front lines

[MzChrista]

Hahaha. My own thoughts were more along the lines of: Jesus Christ shut the fuck up or I'm going to bite that dick of yours.

I'm always amazed that guys aren't more worried about the stuff they tell you when their dick is between your teeths.

Hahaha.

I dont let dicks near my mouth but Im sure that would work.

 

[DeservingBitch]

MzChrista, i think that may be true from both the Domme and sub escorting sides. as i was saying earlier, i'm always wary of a client snapping on me. like there's one guy (actually a lifestyle Dom) who likes to choke/strangle me as he's cumming, and he'll have his hand squeezing my neck so tightly that my eyes roll back and my head feels like it's about to explode. in those moments i'm thinking, what's to stop him from going all the way? what's to say that he won't lose all control himself (as he is in what i consider to a man's most aggressive state...the drive to orgasm) and accidentally send me to the morgue?

but at least with him i pretty much know what to expect from start to finish. what can be even scarier are the sweet, nice ultra-vanilla guys who start off treating you like they're courting the girl of their dreams and then all of a sudden during the course of things flip into Hannibal or something. for some of these guys it doesn't take much for them to just totally flip out. but my subbie wiring sort of twists the danger and fear into an aphrodisiac, otherwise i probably couldn't handle it.

See, I'm a queer Top but I'm perfectly able to fuck/be fucked by vanilla guys for money.

I could never do what you do however. I've always been fascinated by women who do pro-subbing, whether sex is involved or not. I can bottom, but I would never be able to bottom in those circumstances. For exactly the reasons you're mentioning. I'm impressed by the self-control and ability you have to spin it into something erotic for you.

 

[DeservingBitch]

Hahahaha!!



You rock, MzC. I'm glad you came back

I second that.

 

[Netzach]

No doubt.

Heres the thing though. I think there is a distinct danger in Domming that is probably less likely in escorting (If Im wrong, school me) And that is the instant freak out. See, your precautions make sense if the client is able to see that he cant get away with hurting you. But every Domme I know whos done it long as had a guy just lose his mind on them. Like, right in the middle of a whipping on an assfuck something in his brain clicks and he gets overtaken by memories of being an abused child or whatever and he lashes out. Or sometimes, its just you come across a guy who thinks he wants pain but instead of getting a release it builds into a rage inside him.

He can be the nicest guy in the world one minute and a rampaging Viking berserker the next. Theres no way to predict.

Maybe it's because I didn't work multiple scenes daily, maybe because I was a screening lunatic, maybe it's just stupid ass luck, but in 10 years of topping amateur and 3 pro, I never had this dude.

I had asshole arrogant dude. Passing out dude. Clueless dude. But not triggering freakout raging bull dude.

 

[DeservingBitch]

*Sigh* If I were thin and lived somewhere other than Alabama, I'd love to have DB's job.

You thought about Domming?

For a lot of guys looking for a Domme, the bigger the better. especially the guys into ageplay and such.

Yes Domming.

But there's also a niche in escorting for non-skinny girls. Three of the 15 girls working in my agency are wonderfully big and curvy girls, and they're always booked off every night they work.

 

[Netzach]

I can totally see that happening in the pro-Domme world. And indeed, not something that is likely to happen when escorting.

The closest that it comes to in escorting is when the guys get into a guilt trip right after they cum. The condom is still on their dick, and they start interrogating you about STDs (yes, now's the good time to worry about that stupid), or give you the 'why don't you get a real job' talk. One minute they are a horny guy who is more than happy to pay you to fuck them, probably get a thrill out of paying you to fuck them, and as soon as the juice is out, they are overwhelmed by guilt and take it on you.

But that's usually not dangerous. Just really annoying.


Actually, given the laws, the only service you are paying me for is 'companionship'. You are paying for my time, period. What you get during this time is up to me to decide. Giving me attitude or treating me like a non-human being is the surest way to NOT get what you want out of this time.

In my case, as soon as they'd jacked into their little raincoat while I berated them they'd run away.

The running away is not an option when it's their house or hotel room, so they go with the stupid more I imagine. I took it personally for a while - like they were pissed, but really it's from pre-monkey mammalian brain, I imagine. Get off and now the buck with bigger antlers will be along to kick your ass, run!

 

[Netzach]

Personal bounds are funny things.

I could pro-sub in a scene OK. It's acting. I don't think I could screw. I'm not above it, afraid of it or anything of the sort, I just know it's not in my personal makeup. I would just not be all right with it.

 

[YourCaptor]

Wow, is that how you pay for a vacation? Or a car? Or groceries? Or the spa? I gotta get in on this new economy. I'm very seldom satisfied with anything.

I think if men had the hourlong haircuts and got a manicure regularly or their butts waxed they'd be less uptight about paying 250 to get laid or for a personal service. I tossed out any client who had a hang up about the money, unless it was a great play hang up, because frankly if you're too uptight to spend money on YOURSELF and risk it being remotely different from what you want, you're not the right client. You don't hire a realtor or a shrink and then give them a script. You don't tell the hairdresser how to snip, just the look you want.

I never meant it as in now do this, now this, now this. That’s just stupid.

An escort service, in my mind, is someone you would hire to perform a specific role.

For example, the one thing I have seriously considered hiring someone for is to play out my rape fantasy.

Her role would be simple

Be waiting in bed as if sleeping, night shirt and all
Try to fight me off, (eh, no weapons)
End up liking it and wanting more

My point is, if I wanted just sex I would go to a bar, grab that 1 in 10 and go at it all night. But if I want something special that nobody is willing to do, then I would get a pro.

 

[Netzach]

I never meant it as in now do this, now this, now this. That’s just stupid.

That doesn't dissuade anyone else. Trust me.

Your example seems fairly normally open-ended.

 

[DeservingBitch]

Maybe it's because I didn't work multiple scenes daily, maybe because I was a screening lunatic, maybe it's just stupid ass luck, but in 10 years of topping amateur and 3 pro, I never had this dude.

I had asshole arrogant dude. Passing out dude. Clueless dude. But not triggering freakout raging bull dude.

Maybe I'm completely off, and do correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm wondering if your style and speciality doesn't have something to do with you avoiding this dude?

You've mentioned a few times that you are very much into mental edge play. I also seem to remember reading something from you about SSC as it relates to mental edge play. So, maybe because of your style and your personal interests and triggers, you were in some way more 'aware' of those guys and in a better position to filter them out?

Please people don't read this as me suggesting that the Dommes who do get those guys are somehow to blame for it. This is NOT what I'm saying. More something along the lines of because I'm queer, I am more likely to recognize queerness when I see it than straight people will.

 

[Netzach]

Maybe I'm completely off, and do correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm wondering if your style and speciality doesn't have something to do with you avoiding this dude?

You've mentioned a few times that you are very much into mental edge play. I also seem to remember reading something from you about SSC as it relates to mental edge play. So, maybe because of your style and your personal interests and triggers, you were in some way more 'aware' of those guys and in a better position to filter them out?

Please people don't read this as me suggesting that the Dommes who do get those guys are somehow to blame for it. This is NOT what I'm saying. More something along the lines of because I'm queer, I am more likely to recognize queerness when I see it than straight people will.

Maybe - that's a good point. I spent a LOT of pre-screening on head issues and mental space issues. I only attracted clients who wanted to talk about that stuff at length, because more physically oriented ones would often be bored by the time I was done - this was intentional and self-selecting. I don't think I'm totally unique that way, but I do know a lot of other pros who don't ask "what do I need to look for to know you're having a bad time other than you using a stop word" and things of that ilk. I dunno, that's some good food for thought looking back on it.

 

[MzChrista]

Maybe I'm completely off, and do correct me if I'm wrong, but I'm wondering if your style and speciality doesn't have something to do with you avoiding this dude?

You've mentioned a few times that you are very much into mental edge play. I also seem to remember reading something from you about SSC as it relates to mental edge play. So, maybe because of your style and your personal interests and triggers, you were in some way more 'aware' of those guys and in a better position to filter them out?

Please people don't read this as me suggesting that the Dommes who do get those guys are somehow to blame for it. This is NOT what I'm saying. More something along the lines of because I'm queer, I am more likely to recognize queerness when I see it than straight people will.

You may have your finger on something there. In any case Im glad Netzach hasnt had it happen.

Thanks for the compliment by the way.

 

[MzChrista]

Maybe - that's a good point. I spent a LOT of pre-screening on head issues and mental space issues. I only attracted clients who wanted to talk about that stuff at length, because more physically oriented ones would often be bored by the time I was done - this was intentional and self-selecting. I don't think I'm totally unique that way, but I do know a lot of other pros who don't ask "what do I need to look for to know you're having a bad time other than you using a stop word" and things of that ilk. I dunno, that's some good food for thought looking back on it.

I think this is on the right track. When Im Domming a guy Im probably WAY more of a "whos next? Shut up and bend over" type than you are, so your style must screen them better.

 

[Netzach]

I think this is on the right track. When Im Domming a guy Im probably WAY more of a "whos next? Shut up and bend over" type than you are, so your style must screen them better.

Your style is way way way better biz. The headmistress used to tear her hair out over me and this one other girl "you are making this SO MUCH MORE COMPLICATED than it has to be!" Hey, if it's not fun for me, it's not happening. She also knew who to give the white collar headcases to.

 

[DeservingBitch]

In my case, as soon as they'd jacked into their little raincoat while I berated them they'd run away.

The running away is not an option when it's their house or hotel room, so they go with the stupid more I imagine. I took it personally for a while - like they were pissed, but really it's from pre-monkey mammalian brain, I imagine. Get off and now the buck with bigger antlers will be along to kick your ass, run!

I don't take it personally. I actually look at them with pity when they go there. Jesus, I'm the one doing the whoring, and *you* are the one going into a guilt trip? Own your shit and your orgasms stupid.

Personal bounds are funny things.

I could pro-sub in a scene OK. It's acting. I don't think I could screw. I'm not above it, afraid of it or anything of the sort, I just know it's not in my personal makeup. I would just not be all right with it.

Honestly, I have a hard time understanding why I can do it so easily. I knew when I got into it that I could do it. But I thought it would be much harder than it is. And I actually never thought I could genuinely enjoy myself doing it.

It's really weird when you think about it. You wouldn't think that I have the personal makeup to do it either. But somehow, I can do it, I can enjoy it, and in all modesty, I am frickin' good at it.

I think I'm just so narcissistic and exhibitionist that I get my kicks out of performing. It's all a performance right. I like seeing myself on the stage, and I like the reaction i get from my public. It's also just so much fun to get the reaction you want from someone by just tilting your head that way, or slowly moving your legs so that the top of your stockings show and get him all bothered, or looking at him with just the right attitude, or saying the perfect word at the perfect time with the perfect voice... It's like playing with puppets often. It's my show. And I like watching my show.

 

[Netzach]

I don't take it personally. I actually look at them with pity when they go there. Jesus, I'm the one doing the whoring, and *you* are the one going into a guilt trip? Own your shit and your orgasms stupid.


Honestly, I have a hard time understanding why I can do it so easily. I knew when I got into it that I could do it. But I thought it would be much harder than it is. And I actually never thought I could genuinely enjoy myself doing it.

It's really weird when you think about it. You wouldn't think that I have the personal makeup to do it either. But somehow, I can do it, I can enjoy it, and in all modesty, I am frickin' good at it.

I think I'm just so narcissistic and exhibitionist that I get my kicks out of performing. It's all a performance right. I like seeing myself on the stage, and I like the reaction i get from my public. It's also just so much fun to get the reaction you want from someone by just tilting your head that way, or slowly moving your legs so that the top of your stockings show and get him all bothered, or looking at him with just the right attitude, or saying the perfect word at the perfect time with the perfect voice... It's like playing with puppets often. It's my show. And I like watching my show.

I know myself. There'd be some lost puppy and I'd take it home in some fashion, boundaries would blur, hearts would break, it would be this horrid mess just a six car pileup.

A jello fist in an iron glove.

 

[BiBunny]

You thought about Domming?

For a lot of guys looking for a Domme, the bigger the better. especially the guys into ageplay and such.

I've thought seriously about it. But the truth is, even though I switch fairly regularly, I don't have the experience, the equipment, the facilities, or the wardrobe. And then there's still the whole "living in Alabama" thing. It's still illegal to sell sex toys here. There's a damned good possibility I'd get my ass hauled off to jail for prostitution, even with very strict sexual contact rules in place. I would absolutely love it, though, I believe.

Yes Domming.

But there's also a niche in escorting for non-skinny girls. Three of the 15 girls working in my agency are wonderfully big and curvy girls, and they're always booked off every night they work.

That's also interesting. Again, damn this living in the Bible Belt. Like y'all said earlier, I'd look horrid in an orange jumpsuit.

Personal bounds are funny things.

I could pro-sub in a scene OK. It's acting. I don't think I could screw. I'm not above it, afraid of it or anything of the sort, I just know it's not in my personal makeup. I would just not be all right with it.

I think I'd enjoy pro-subbing, too, provided there was someone else around to make sure I didn't get killed or something.

 

[DeservingBitch]

I never meant it as in now do this, now this, now this. That’s just stupid.

An escort service, in my mind, is someone you would hire to perform a specific role.

For example, the one thing I have seriously considered hiring someone for is to play out my rape fantasy.

Her role would be simple

Be waiting in bed as if sleeping, night shirt and all
Try to fight me off, (eh, no weapons)
End up liking it and wanting more

My point is, if I wanted just sex I would go to a bar, grab that 1 in 10 and go at it all night. But if I want something special that nobody is willing to do, then I would get a pro.

OK, that's completely different from how I read your earlier comment. That I'm down with.

Sounds similar to what I've always said about all those m/f couple seeking the mythological HBB and pestering queer girls to get it on with them: if what you're looking for is a hot chick to 'spice up' your sex life and to be a prop in your fantasy-enacting, leave the bi and queer girls alone, and hire a pro.

 

[DeservingBitch]

I know myself. There'd be some lost puppy and I'd take it home in some fashion, boundaries would blur, hearts would break, it would be this horrid mess just a six car pileup.

A jello fist in an iron glove.

Bwahaha! I love this line.

Again, not fucking or having relationship with men in my personal life probably makes it quite easy for me to not blur the boundaries and bring home a lost puppy.

 

[Netzach]

Bwahaha! I love this line.

Again, not fucking or having relationship with men in my personal life probably makes it quite easy for me to not blur the boundaries and bring home a lost puppy.

Totally. I have no confusion over how lesbian women can do straight sex work and straight guys can do gay for pay porn - it makes MORE sense to me in a way.

Although that seems antithetical to the fact that my orientation and my work overlapped and did so in an OK fashion, but whatever, that's just what makes sense to me for whatever reason.

 

[MzChrista]

I don't take it personally. I actually look at them with pity when they go there. Jesus, I'm the one doing the whoring, and *you* are the one going into a guilt trip? Own your shit and your orgasms stupid.


Honestly, I have a hard time understanding why I can do it so easily. I knew when I got into it that I could do it. But I thought it would be much harder than it is. And I actually never thought I could genuinely enjoy myself doing it.

It's really weird when you think about it. You wouldn't think that I have the personal makeup to do it either. But somehow, I can do it, I can enjoy it, and in all modesty, I am frickin' good at it.

I think I'm just so narcissistic and exhibitionist that I get my kicks out of performing. It's all a performance right. I like seeing myself on the stage, and I like the reaction i get from my public. It's also just so much fun to get the reaction you want from someone by just tilting your head that way, or slowly moving your legs so that the top of your stockings show and get him all bothered, or looking at him with just the right attitude, or saying the perfect word at the perfect time with the perfect voice... It's like playing with puppets often. It's my show. And I like watching my show.

Oh yeah. I always feel like Im performing when I do a scene. (Shit its even called "do a scene"). And there is such a thing as Dom Space. For me, when I am really ON and everything is working, its almost as if I have floated out of myself and I am watching from the outside.

 

[MzChrista]

I've thought seriously about it. But the truth is, even though I switch fairly regularly, I don't have the experience, the equipment, the facilities, or the wardrobe. And then there's still the whole "living in Alabama" thing. It's still illegal to sell sex toys here. There's a damned good possibility I'd get my ass hauled off to jail for prostitution, even with very strict sexual contact rules in place. I would absolutely love it, though, I believe.



That's also interesting. Again, damn this living in the Bible Belt. Like y'all said earlier, I'd look horrid in an orange jumpsuit.



I think I'd enjoy pro-subbing, too, provided there was someone else around to make sure I didn't get killed or something.

If you get an orange jump suit Ill buy a prison guard uniform.

I get what youre saying about the law and I wouldnt talk you into trouble. (Well, not that sort of trouble)

But I just want to say that it doesnt take a big investment in equiptment to get started. I have a friend who advertises herself as a "stern auntie" type. All she does is spank ass. Shes got a hairbrush and a belt and a couple paddles and she makes good dough.

 

[Homburg]

Oh yeah. I always feel like Im performing when I do a scene. (Shit its even called "do a scene"). And there is such a thing as Dom Space. For me, when I am really ON and everything is working, its almost as if I have floated out of myself and I am watching from the outside.

Absolutely. I honestly love that feeling. I'm not in me, I'm watching me, I'm watching her, and everybody around me. My skin feels things three feet away, and every sense is sharp. I love that space.

Interesting, it usually comes only when I have an audience, or when I am doing some really serious tying.

-------------

It's my show. And I like watching my show.

Right, I would totally watch your show. Call the networks, and get this woman on cable.

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This thread kills. Easily the most interesting thread on Lit in a long, long time.

 

[MzChrista]

Bwahaha! I love this line.

Again, not fucking or having relationship with men in my personal life probably makes it quite easy for me to not blur the boundaries and bring home a lost puppy.

I just realized that we are sort of living a stereotype here. Looks like just about all the women who will fess to doing sex work are queer.

 

[MzChrista]

Absolutely. I honestly love that feeling. I'm not in me, I'm watching me, I'm watching her, and everybody around me. My skin feels things three feet away, and every sense is sharp. I love that space.

Interesting, it usually comes only when I have an audience, or when I am doing some really serious tying.

-------------



Right, I would totally watch your show. Call the networks, and get this woman on cable.

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This thread kills. Easily the most interesting thread on Lit in a long, long time.

You are right on all counts.

I love playing in front of an audience. Maybe that ought to be its own thread.