✨Highlights and Bombshells💥

[SimonSex]

I watched Poltergeist with my kids and their neighborhood friends when they were around 11 or 12. It was during a hurricane, which added to the drama, but they had all eyes glued to the TV and huddled together under blankets. They still talk about it today some 12 years later. That movie has every trick in the book for scaring kids!

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

Worry Wart​

Are you a worrier? Would you say you are anxious? Or would you classify it as being a planner or thinking ahead? Is it a blessing or a curse? Would you change this quality about yourself?

This image below -hopefully it’ll stick around for a bit, but in case it disappears- is an image of two of the same man’s profiles. On one of them, there are lines emitting from his eyes to show him looking outward. And the other profile has lines pointing from his eyes to show his focus going inside his skull - or looking inward. The caption under the profile of the man looking outward says “field of vision of a normal person”, and under the other one, it says “field of vision of an anxious person.”

This made me think a lot of how when I’m feeling anxious, it’s because I’m all wrapped around the axle with my own thoughts and not paying attention to anything else. Not asking for help. Not looking at how things really are; only focusing on my interpretation of them. Perseverating on negative thoughts. It’s so hard to get out of that cycle when I find myself there.

But it can also be a blessing when I get focused on things - hyper focused. I’m on time. Prepared. Have a backup plan for the backup plan. So I guess it’s not all bad.

Where do you fall on the anxious to normal spectrum? What do you tend to worry about that wouldn’t be something that we’d find on the nightly news? (We don’t wanna talk about the news, goodness knows)

 

[hotwords229_A]

I wouldn’t classify myself as much of a worrier. I am a plan ahead kind of person, be prepared for x number of outcomes, but I do that so I don’t have to worry—because I have it covered.

I do have some obsessive thoughts that kick in sometimes when stressed, this could be categorized as worry, but I also recognize that I’m doing it and talk myself down from it. So I think I have it pretty much under control.

I would like to be one of those people who just breeze through life and let things happen, but I’m more of a control freak and that just isn’t possible. So a certain amount of worry or stress is baked into my persona. I do think it’s on the minimal side though.

 

[birdy]

Are you a worrier? Would you say you are anxious? Or would you classify it as being a planner or thinking ahead? Is it a blessing or a curse? Would you change this quality about yourself?

I've always planned ahead. I'll have backup plans for my backup plans lol. I have anxiety and worry sometimes, but I find that it helps to plan something out, even if that isn't what actually happens, I feel better having plans rather than thinking of something in the moment. I've been a worrier a lot lately with a big life change on the horizon, but am embracing it and reminding myself of the positives that I am moving toward instead of what might be holding me back. The image you posted is so accurate! I am way too deep in my head sometimes!

 

[SimonSex]

Like @hotwords229_A and @birdy, I tend to be a planner, mostly because I do not enjoy drama (in my life anyway) and plans can often be changed if needed. A bird in the hand and all that.

I think that I know what you mean @Love_Is_Blonde regarding anxious thoughts and how they can sometimes cripple your thinking process. For me, it’s worry of the future unknowns for my children and their future lives. Part of me thinks that I will never rest until I have surety that everything will be alright for them and future generations.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I should also have mentioned that I DO worry about family/friends. It’s snowing and they’re traveling—Where are they? Are they back yet? What’s taking so long? Etc.

But I think that’s pretty standard. Everyone does that unless they’re a psychopath.

 

[SalaciousMonkey22]

Worry Wart​

Are you a worrier? Would you say you are anxious? Or would you classify it as being a planner or thinking ahead? Is it a blessing or a curse? Would you change this quality about yourself?

This image below -hopefully it’ll stick around for a bit, but in case it disappears- is an image of two of the same man’s profiles. On one of them, there are lines emitting from his eyes to show him looking outward. And the other profile has lines pointing from his eyes to show his focus going inside his skull - or looking inward. The caption under the profile of the man looking outward says “field of vision of a normal person”, and under the other one, it says “field of vision of an anxious person.”

This made me think a lot of how when I’m feeling anxious, it’s because I’m all wrapped around the axle with my own thoughts and not paying attention to anything else. Not asking for help. Not looking at how things really are; only focusing on my interpretation of them. Perseverating on negative thoughts. It’s so hard to get out of that cycle when I find myself there.

But it can also be a blessing when I get focused on things - hyper focused. I’m on time. Prepared. Have a backup plan for the backup plan. So I guess it’s not all bad.

Where do you fall on the anxious to normal spectrum? What do you tend to worry about that wouldn’t be something that we’d find on the nightly news? (We don’t wanna talk about the news, goodness knows)

View attachment 2542442

I’m definitely the inward focused one.
I WISH I could plan. I have no focus or attention. I just do and trust that I’m pretty smart and will figure it out. Of course I’m also a bit anxious and really good at figuring out what can go horribly wrong. Which was somewhat useful professionally but not always personally.

Anyway I’m very familiar with the 3:30 am what ifs

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

I’m definitely the inward focused one.
I WISH I could plan. I have no focus or attention. I just do and trust that I’m pretty smart and will figure it out. Of course I’m also a bit anxious and really good at figuring out what can go horribly wrong. Which was somewhat useful professionally but not always personally.

Anyway I’m very familiar with the 3:30 am what ifs

View attachment 2542623

Aaah now I have 10 new ones!

 

[BreukelenAnima]

Worry Wart​

Are you a worrier? Would you say you are anxious? Or would you classify it as being a planner or thinking ahead? Is it a blessing or a curse? Would you change this quality about yourself?

I think being anxious is a bad trait for anyone to willingly take on. Planning is essential and helps keep anxiety at bay, but there are always going to be things beyond our control... and it helps to recognize those things can happen, can affect the best laid plans. I do worry and overthink things when it involves my children and this is also something I work on constantly because I don't want them to see me worrying... for the fear that it will affect their confidence. I would immediately change that quality about myself, but have tried to evolve into / adapt a more "chill" mindset.

Also, and I hope I'm not veering too much off-topic, but I used to be such a worrier.... I worried so much about what people thought of me... Any kind of disagreement -- I was always the one to reach out first with an olive branch or an apology. After awhile, I realized how unhealthy that was....to apologize for something I felt I hadn't done. The night my son was born.....well, at that time, I was involved in a lawsuit with a former good friend and so many of our mutual friends had taken sides and I worried about what they all thought...I even felt terrible for the friend who was suing me... like how did we even get here? But the minute I became a father for the first time, all of that worrying behavior -- I literally could feel it shedding itself from my body, my mind and especially, my heart. I became a new person and have never given a f - - - what anyone has ever thought about me...since that night... since I held him for the first time. It's allowed me to be a better father -- knowing I only had to care about the opinion of two little people in my life and that's all that would ever matter for the rest of my life. *(sorry if I strayed off topic much... it's another fascinating prompt.)

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]

I think part of it is maturation, right? Growing up, getting older, learning from experiences, and learning to trust yourself. At least, that’s why what I’ve worried about, at least, has changed.

As I was reading all of the responses above, I wondered about the people you are attracted to. Have you been attracted to people who have to plan a lot also? Or have you been more attracted to a free spirit? Have you noticed a pattern? Why do you think so?

 

[BreukelenAnima]

Yes, I agree. Maturing, learning from experiences, trusting our instincts... we learn to prioritize our worrying...and not sweat the small stuff. Plus, there's the "I'm too old to give damn..." factor.

I think being a planner has to do with being organized and some people are just naturally well organized. It comes easy to them... I think I'm more of a free spirit (which some would call being disorganized -- but "free spirit" sounds so much cooler, which is now the prism to which any attempts to get organized will be viewed. "I'll try and organize this, but keep in mind, I'm more of a free spirit.") My ex was excellent with making plans, lists, creating contingency plans in case of a mishap... I don't know if I was attracted to it, but did admire her organizational skills and I think it definitely influenced me in developing that skill-- well, at least trying to.

 

[SimonSex]

As I was reading all of the responses above, I wondered about the people you are attracted to. Have you been attracted to people who have to plan a lot also? Or have you been more attracted to a free spirit? Have you noticed a pattern? Why do you think so?

My life partner most definitely colors outside the lines more than I do. While I cannot say it attracted me to her, I have learned to embrace that quality and can now do it myself!

With past relationships, there’s no clear pattern: some had their shit together and some were a shit show. In general, I have not been attracted to planners as a lack of creativity tends to accompany that in my experience. YMMV.

…and here I am breaking this into paragraphs when I could have left a block response. I do like order.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I haven’t noticed a pattern, but I’m certainly not looking for a worry wart.
I do find organizational skills attractive and someone who is attentive and empathetic to others, but worrying about everything is not something I can tolerate.

I think in this case, opposites attract. I can be Captain Improvise and she can be Planerella. Together we’re unstoppable.

 

[SimonSex]

I see a new Marvel hero franchise on the horizon!

 

[Mei5ter]

I should also have mentioned that I DO worry about family/friends. It’s snowing and they’re traveling—Where are they? Are they back yet? What’s taking so long? Etc.

But I think that’s pretty standard. Everyone does that unless they’re a psychopath.

I can safely say that it was a serious red flag when someone didn't worry about that earlier this year.

Keep it up!

 

[Mei5ter]

Worry Wart​

Are you a worrier? Would you say you are anxious? Or would you classify it as being a planner or thinking ahead? Is it a blessing or a curse? Would you change this quality about yourself?

This image below -hopefully it’ll stick around for a bit, but in case it disappears- is an image of two of the same man’s profiles. On one of them, there are lines emitting from his eyes to show him looking outward. And the other profile has lines pointing from his eyes to show his focus going inside his skull - or looking inward. The caption under the profile of the man looking outward says “field of vision of a normal person”, and under the other one, it says “field of vision of an anxious person.”

This made me think a lot of how when I’m feeling anxious, it’s because I’m all wrapped around the axle with my own thoughts and not paying attention to anything else. Not asking for help. Not looking at how things really are; only focusing on my interpretation of them. Perseverating on negative thoughts. It’s so hard to get out of that cycle when I find myself there.

But it can also be a blessing when I get focused on things - hyper focused. I’m on time. Prepared. Have a backup plan for the backup plan. So I guess it’s not all bad.

Where do you fall on the anxious to normal spectrum? What do you tend to worry about that wouldn’t be something that we’d find on the nightly news? (We don’t wanna talk about the news, goodness knows)

View attachment 2542442

I'm trying to work out why they used a sketch of Lenin to illustrate this very interesting point. He had his strengths and weaknesses but I'm not sure he was a serial worrier.

I don't think I'm a natural worrier. I think too much, and I certainly live in my own head too much sometimes. But i don't experience anxiety in consequence, I don't think? Beyond the usual things - like @hotwords229_A 's example of someone driving and taking too long to get there. Or worrying that I'd never get a girlfriend when I was a teenager (though my school was all male so this was not such an unreasonable thing to think at the time).

I'm normally quite good at solving problems, and I'll back myself to deal with whatever comes. I don't feel the need to plan for individual, specific situations. As I've got older, I've also enjoyed the challenges that come with taking on greater responsibility for others, and it's a privilege to do so and feel i make a difference. Unfortunately, as we get older, those responsibilities mount up. I can, and have, dealt with the big stuff. But things which are half as tough are twice as hard when there are four at once (#math).

And that's when I have my 3.30am moments. I can slay an individual dragon, but it's harder fighting off four black dogs at once. That requires planning, for which I have a memo clock by my bed. Unfortunately, the pen I keep with it has invariably been batted somewhere inconvenient by my cat, but that's another story.

 

[Endless_Night]

I am definitely a worrier.

Nearly all my time is spent in my head. To the point where I'm rather oblivious to my environment. Normally that's not a problem. but my anxiety soars with situations outside of my control or when it involves trusting other people. Situation dependent it can be crippling.

I am a planner. And then I plan for the plans.

Organized. I live on lists and problem solving. Focused - selectively. Once I get on something everything falls before me. I have a fair amount of drive.

Yet I lose my keys and reading glasses ten times a day.

As I've got older, I've also enjoyed the challenges that come with taking on greater responsibility for others, and it's a privilege to do so and feel i make a difference.

Interesting how experience can be diametrically opposed. I am the oldest child in an unstable family group. I'm been taking responsibility for other people my entire life. These last couple of years I've found myself restless, and tired.

I'd rather have someone be responsible for me, at least in the submissive sense and all the ways that ripples out. Letting someone do that is an entirely different story.

Old patterns die hard.

 

[Endless_Night]

I think part of it is maturation, right? Growing up, getting older, learning from experiences, and learning to trust yourself. At least, that’s why what I’ve worried about, at least, has changed.

For me, not so much. It's not myself I don't trust.

I will say that getting older and navigating a wider variety of situations has helped tamp my general anxiety. Too, reaching a place of more financial security means I have to deal with other people less.

As I was reading all of the responses above, I wondered about the people you are attracted to. Have you been attracted to people who have to plan a lot also? Or have you been more attracted to a free spirit? Have you noticed a pattern? Why do you think so?

I seem to gravitate towards men that are calm and steady. Generally not planners, though a little more of that might not come amiss.

Why? I'm volatile enough on my own?

 

[Ash999]

I think part of it is maturation, right? Growing up, getting older, learning from experiences, and learning to trust yourself. At least, that’s why what I’ve worried about, at least, has changed.

As I was reading all of the responses above, I wondered about the people you are attracted to. Have you been attracted to people who have to plan a lot also? Or have you been more attracted to a free spirit? Have you noticed a pattern? Why do you think so?

What a lovely word---- ' Maturation'!!! First I heard of / read this Term !!?
U invented a wonderful Word!!!
Hearty Congrats!!!

 

[Lord Pmann]

I think part of it is maturation, right? Growing up, getting older, learning from experiences, and learning to trust yourself. At least, that’s why what I’ve worried about, at least, has changed.

As I was reading all of the responses above, I wondered about the people you are attracted to. Have you been attracted to people who have to plan a lot also? Or have you been more attracted to a free spirit? Have you noticed a pattern? Why do you think so?

I get attracted to people for a couple of reasons.

*makes boob hand motion*

But, the reality is, I must have someone very compatible to me and the uber free spirit and I do not mesh. I can be very structured and I like things a certain way. The rod up my ass has a rod up its ass. So I will suffocate the needs of the free spirit and they will drive me insane.

If you like a spreadsheet, let’s talk. If you like, patchouli, we can talk online. And only online.

 

[LadyLascivious1]

The rod up my ass has a rod up its ass.

I’m now picturing a prostate wand with its own prostate toy

 

[Lord Pmann]

I’m now picturing a prostate wand with its own prostate toy

I’d post a picture but… new rules.

 

[Ash999]

*Let’s go, Dad.*

Anton Chekhov writes in one of his stories :

At the bus stop, an old man and a young pregnant woman were waiting together.

The man kept staring at the woman’s round belly, intrigued. Then he gently dared to ask :
— How far along are you ?

The young woman seemed elsewhere, lost in thought. Worry was written on her tired face. At first, she didn’t answer. Then, after a few seconds of silence, she murmured :
— I’m at twenty-three weeks...

— Is this your first child ? he asked.
— Yes, she replied, her voice barely audible.

— Don’t be afraid, he added. Everything will be all right, you’ll see.

She placed a hand on her belly, looked straight ahead, her eyes shining, fighting back tears.
— I hope so… she replied.

The old man continued:
— Sometimes we let ourselves be overwhelmed by worries that, in truth, don’t deserve it...

— Maybe…, she whispered sadly.

He looked at her more closely, with more compassion.
— You seem to be going through a hard time. Your husband… is he not with you ?

— He left me four months ago.

— Why ?!

— It’s complicated…

— And your loved ones? Your family, friends ? No one to support you ?

She took a deep breath.
— I live alone with my father… He’s ill.

A long silence. Then the old man asked :
— Is he still the pillar you once knew as a child ?

Tears rolled down the young woman’s cheeks.
— Yes ..… Even now.

— Even in his condition? What’s wrong with him ?

— He no longer remembers who I am ..…

She spoke those words just as the bus arrived.
She stood up, took a few steps… Then changed her mind, came back to the old man, gently took his hand, and said tenderly :

*Let’s go, Dad*.

 

[SimonSex]

Most likely, not Chekhov.

 

[Love_Is_Blonde]