Anyone wanting hugs and random non-sex chat on the thread here?

[Crownvic]

I’ve always thought this
Now I’m realizing that perhaps it simply places you for far more painful rejection

View attachment 2452834

You are among friends...

 

[AtramentousRex]

Thank you. And agree, I’ll always be myself, as should you
But that’s different from letting yourself be vulnerable

I say that it depends on the type of vulnerability. If you put yourself at risk of physical harm, then yes, by all means protecting yourself is the right thing.

But if you can't be emotionally vulnerable, then you will miss out on all of the possibilities of joy and love. You will be giving up hope.

Human beings are terrified of vulnerability which makes it damned hard to be genuine. So now, we live in a society of very lonely people who are scared of feeling anything too deeply. You can be safe and never get your heart broken again. There is a price to be paid for that security, however.

I've had my whole heart and identity shattered by love. I'd still rather feel that than to close myself off and isolate myself with the pain.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I say that it depends on the type of vulnerability. If you put yourself at risk of physical harm, then yes, by all means protecting yourself is the right thing.

I wasn’t referring to physical vulnerability no, I thought that was wholly clear from the context of what I was saying. Clearly nobody should ever be in a situation of harm

 

[MiaBabe23]

I say that it depends on the type of vulnerability. If you put yourself at risk of physical harm, then yes, by all means protecting yourself is the right thing.

But if you can't be emotionally vulnerable, then you will miss out on all of the possibilities of joy and love. You will be giving up hope.

Human beings are terrified of vulnerability which makes it damned hard to be genuine. So now, we live in a society of very lonely people who are scared of feeling anything too deeply. You can be safe and never get your heart broken again. There is a price to be paid for that security, however.

I've had my whole heart and identity shattered by love. I'd still rather feel that than to close myself off and isolate myself with the pain.

And thanks for meaning well with the other comments, hopefully they will be of use to someone who needs that

 

[AtramentousRex]

And thanks for meaning well with the lecture, maybe it will be of use to someone who needs that

I wasn't lecturing anyone. Just saying what I feel about the subject. You have to do you.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I wasn't lecturing anyone. Just saying what I feel about the subject. You have to do you.

I just rephrased it, because I realized it was badly worded, not a lecture, my apologies

 

[Saltfountain]

Oh no, you have a cold?

Not that fun

 

[AtramentousRex]

I just rephrased it, because I realized it was badly worded, not a lecture, my apologies

It's okay. I've been where you are. Try to have a peaceful day my friend. Treat yourself kindly.

 

[MiaBabe23]

You are among friends...

If you give a wink face when you say that, I think you’ve completely misunderstood the point of the post. It’s not encouraging sex chat

 

[MiaBabe23]

It's okay. I've been where you are. Try to have a peaceful day my friend. Treat yourself kindly.

You again mean well, and I’m grateful for that, thanks, but you have no idea where I am, so perhaps I could take that shovel from you before you spout more judgments

 

[Broken_paladin]

how about instead of feeling vulnerable we form a gang and roll up on people with clubs and sticks for making us feel some type of way?

 

[MiaBabe23]

how about instead of feeling vulnerable we form a gang and roll up on people with clubs and sticks for making us feel some type of way?

How about we don’t do that

 

[Crownvic]

How about we don’t do that

Goodness No.

 

[MiaBabe23]

how about instead of feeling vulnerable we form a gang and roll up on people with clubs and sticks for making us feel some type of way?

Did you just give a sad reaction to me saying let’s not lol
I guess you could form your own gang

 

[Broken_paladin]

Did you just give a sad reaction to me saying let’s not lol
I guess you could form your own gang

honestly, broken or not, I tend to work best alone lol..
I was just trying to lift the vibe.

 

[Tallulah82]

But if you can't be emotionally vulnerable, then you will miss out on all of the possibilities of joy and love. You will be giving up hope.

Human beings are terrified of vulnerability which makes it damned hard to be genuine. So now, we live in a society of very lonely people who are scared of feeling anything too deeply. You can be safe and never get your heart broken again. There is a price to be paid for that security, however.

I've had my whole heart and identity shattered by love. I'd still rather feel that than to close myself off and isolate myself with the pain.

I'm sure you meant this post from a well meaning perspective, but I think you need to consider that for some people the safety you seem to scorn is far, far more appealing than the pain that's been experienced.

I am one. I have my own experiences and I am fully aware of what you think I'm missing out on. And I accept that. What I don't accept are people 'advising' people like me to take chances with the undertone of pity.

We don't know what each other is going through. You can speak your experience but maybe leave it at that.

 

[MiaBabe23]

honestly, broken or not, I tend to work best alone lol..
I was just trying to lift the vibe.

Lucky you
And I figured lol

 

[Broken_paladin]

I'm sure you meant this post from a well meaning perspective, but I think you need to consider that for some people the safety you seem to scorn is far, far more appealing than the pain that's been experienced.

I am one. I have my own experiences and I am fully aware of what you think I'm missing out on. And I accept that. What I don't accept are people 'advising' people like me to take chances with the undertone of pity.

We don't know what each other is going through. You can speak your experience but maybe leave it at that.

And if that dont work we can fall back on mince pies and santa porn!!

 

[Tallulah82]

And if that dont work we can fall back on mince pies and santa porn!!

Not. Mince. Pies! Stop trying to feed me awful stuff! I'll take a dollop of trifle, though. To go with the Santa porn.

 

[Broken_paladin]

Not. Mince. Pies! Stop trying to feed me awful stuff! I'll take a dollop of trifle, though. To go with the Santa porn.

You going to explain dollop of trifle or am I going to have to oogle search it again?

 

[TomTeacher19]

Some people are rightfully terrified and/or still traumatized or hurt from being vulnerable. Some people are excited and motivated and have great experiences with it. I imagine a lot of people have experienced both sides. And even within that we all have different definitions and levels of vulnerability. Lit shows us that as well as anything. I'm thankful for several people here who have been willing to hear where I am and meet me there and give me the safety and comfort I need that stage. I hope we can all do that for one another.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I'm sure you meant this post from a well meaning perspective, but I think you need to consider that for some people the safety you seem to scorn is far, far more appealing than the pain that's been experienced.

I am one. I have my own experiences and I am fully aware of what you think I'm missing out on. And I accept that. What I don't accept are people 'advising' people like me to take chances with the undertone of pity.

We don't know what each other is going through. You can speak your experience but maybe leave it at that.

Well said
And I’m sorry for whatever it is you’ve been through
I’m unfortunately aware my feelings for someone are unchanging
So it would be dumb to then decide to open myself up to hurt with someone else
Sometimes you - as in I at least - have to know when to recognize that

 

[Whiskeyjack]

I don't want to make you all jealous, but I just had a wicked good nap.
I just wish I could fall asleep at 11pm as easily as I do at 2pm.

 

[MiaBabe23]

I don't want to make you all jealous, but I just had a wicked good nap.
I just wish I could fall asleep at 11pm as easily as I do at 2pm.

I don’t know how people do that! I can’t sleep during the day unless exhaustion takes over

 

[Tallulah82]

Well said
And I’m sorry for whatever it is you’ve been through
I’m unfortunately aware my feelings for someone are unchanging
So it would be dumb to then decide to open myself up to hurt with someone else
Sometimes you have to know when to recognize that

You need to do what is best for you. I'm a huge advocate for trusting your instincts whenever possible, especially when it comes to letting people into your life. And also kicking them the fuck out if they are not healthy for you.