Are sissies queer?

[liqueur]

—or is the whole sissy phenomenon a cruel porn-driven parody of queerdom?

(NOTE, 06/23/26): This is not my opinion. It is one I've encountered frequently elsewhere on the Internet.

(hint): I know this is not a simple yes-or-no question. I'm just interested in hearing as many perspectives as possible. And no bashing!!

I'll save my own thoughts till later.

 

[Britva415]

I’ll post mine now: Who’s to say? Some will identify that way, some won’t. Some who do will identify as queer on the basis of being sissy, and some won’t on that basis because it will be based on something else.

All will be called queer by queerphobes, if they know of someone’s sissyhood, but I don’t think that’s what the question is about.

 

[Aleisterwolfe]

I like to define queer as “someone whose sexual orientation doesn’t fit within heteronormative assumptions” and i think that would cover sissies… but by all means, everyone should choose their own labels (or refuse to be labeled.)

 

[OralAllOver]

NOBODY is queen -- until their bedroom has a duvet

https://www.marthastewart.com/what-is-a-duvet-7967435

 

[Aleisterwolfe]

I knew my duvet collection was gonna give it away

 

[panty_chap]

I asked myself this same question a year or two ago when I started realizing the line between fetish/fantasy and reality were getting blurred for me.

Long story but the gist is I am now what I've referred to as a reluctant sissy. I would have never labeled myself as one, but a certain cyberdom pointed out a few things that were hard to argue with and well, if the shoe fits?

I think what triggered the question for me was trying to decide where to post things here. BDSM? LGBT? I mean I know I get submissive, but it was also pointed out to me I wasn't exactly straight, but I'm not gay, but am I queer?

I'm still not sure I fit everyone's definition of queer but I hang out here anyway. If I have to be labled I think it fits better than any other ones. Which, I'll be the first to admit, I'm not an expert on. I have no idea what half the acronyms mean around here.

But if you force me to choose, yeah, sissie's are queer. At least the queer ones are.

 

[apantyhoselovr]

i wear pantyhose with nude guys, they feel me and hear me say it makes me want dick...it leads to me on my knees using my mouth to make his dick cum...you tell me.

 

[tristantrotsky]

i wear pantyhose with nude guys, they feel me and hear me say it makes me want dick...it leads to me on my knees using my mouth to make his dick cum...you tell me.

If you do being Sissy right, it's bound to be joyfully queer

 

[Brianna_Hope]

If one of you is wearing a dress..its not queer....lol

 

[cdstefi]

I'm not very good at navigating these terms, not even top or bottom

It's all just sex to me whether it's a man or a woman, whether I'm arse-, pussy- or face-fucking them, ejaculating on them, taking a cock up my arse or being ridden by either sex. I do like to do it wearing lingerie, but I don't feel sissy when doing so; if anything I feel more masculine than when I'm naked, because I'm more turned on. And sex with a man is definitely gay, queer, whatever term you want but it's hot, lustful and perfectly fine for it.

 

[Britva415]

"Queer" is a very huge umbrella. There are people who would define it as simply, if you think you are, then you can claim it. If you want to be, you can have it. I don't disagree with that, but I think another helpful way of looking at is is like this:

Would bigots call it queer if they knew about it? If you were uncloseted about it in the wrong bar or the wrong state or the wrong family member's house?

Living with the knowledge that that could happen is an important piece. The decisions to risk it anyway, or to judiciously closet it under certain circumstances, those decisions are acknowledgements that what you're doing or feeling or wearing or revealing is "queer" because other people will say it is.

I don't like the idea that "the queer community" or queer belonging might be defined by the very people who would use it to abuse us. And they don't define anyone's identity, they only define their own prejudices. And there are queer-identifying people who won't ever experience the bashing, the discrimination, the namecalling or the othering. But I really do feel like it can be important to look at a question like "is this queer" from the point of view which asks, "would a bigot think so?"

 

[switchitter13]

i wear pantyhose with nude guys, they feel me and hear me say it makes me want dick...it leads to me on my knees using my mouth to make his dick cum...you tell me.

Exactly

 

[coral_lipstick]

—or is the whole sissy phenomenon a cruel porn-driven parody of queerdom?

(hint): I know this is not a simple yes-or-no question. I'm just interested in hearing as many perspectives as possible. And no bashing!!

I'll save my own thoughts till later.

Interesting question, labeling something is always difficult. Don't think it is a parody along the lines of the 'Drag Queen' which seems to be the adult continuance of the high school drama class world. That is not to meant to be bashing as there is absolutely nothing wrong with a high school drama class. Really, they both sucked.
Personally, maybe it is just trying to be true to oneself and enjoying it because time on this Earth is short.

 

[ZacharyFagg]

I firmly believe that being queer, gay, or bi means that someone is sexualy attracted to the same sex.

There's plenty of sissies who are only attracted to females.

Even if they occasionally have sex with a male, they may not be attracted to males.

So I don't believe just being a sissy makes one queer.

 

[Wag_that_tail86]

Being true to yourself is the key thing. To me, queer means not 'straight' and covers a broad spectrum. And what does straight mean anyway? A lot of 'straight' people have queer fantasies or desires.

 

[Britva415]

is the whole sissy phenomenon a cruel porn-driven parody of queerdom?

I can't imagine who would think that. Does anyone? Why can't a sissy just be a sissy without being compared to how good their drag is and how gay their sex is?

Why can't a sissy just be who they are and do what they do without other people trying to make it about other queer people?

And I can't even begin to imagine why anyone would see cruelty in it. The fuck

 

[liqueur]

Why can't a sissy just be a sissy ...
And I can't even begin to imagine why anyone would see cruelty in it.

Some do, I assure you. Many within the trans community in particular have a merciless political critique of sissyhood. which was why I asked the question.

 

[ZacharyFagg]

Some do, I assure you. Many within the trans community in particular have a merciless political critique of sissyhood. which was why I asked the question.

So do some gay men...

 

[Britva415]

Many within the trans community in particular have a merciless political critique of sissyhood. which was why I asked the question.

Oh.

I don't like that. I believe it, but I don't like it.

I wonder how those very people feel about similar people who insist that transwomen make a cruel parody of feminism.

 

[BillyWalrus]

My girlfriend just thinks that they, along with drag performers, are amusing. I always admire how secure she is with her own identity.

 

[Sounding22]

I don’t think they are queer but just more feminine. I’m nowhere near masculine and fine with it.
Have a good friend (lesbian), she’s more masculine than I could ever be lol.
Her friend Elizabeth always reminds me I’m their bitch. I like it TBH

 

[Samantha47]

I'm not very good at navigating these terms, not even top or bottom

It's all just sex to me whether it's a man or a woman, whether I'm arse-, pussy- or face-fucking them, ejaculating on them, taking a cock up my arse or being ridden by either sex. I do like to do it wearing lingerie, but I don't feel sissy when doing so; if anything I feel more masculine than when I'm naked, because I'm more turned on. And sex with a man is definitely gay, queer, whatever term you want but it's hot, lustful and perfectly fine for it.

Oh god yes it is

 

[droberts44]

Oh god yes it is

My sissies are femme, but can switch fast.

 

[Samantha47]

My sissies are femme, but can switch fast.

Sounds so good to me

 

[Ciceri]

I'm a sissy and I like dressing up head to toe but it's based on my adoration for females. The men who are attracted to my female form are a lot like me. I think most men are drawn to the feminine form -I just happen to be the clothed vehicle. (I'm not attracted to males, btw)